Welcome, Guest: Register On Nairaland / LOGIN! / Trending / Recent / New
Stats: 3,158,474 members, 7,836,875 topics. Date: Wednesday, 22 May 2024 at 01:55 PM

My Wife Is Surprising Me; She Is Now A Direct Opposite Of Whom I Thought She Was - Family (7) - Nairaland

Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Family / My Wife Is Surprising Me; She Is Now A Direct Opposite Of Whom I Thought She Was (47255 Views)

Why Do Girls Turn Out The Direct Opposite Of What Their Parents Are trying to av / Swiss Woman Married To A Nigerian Thought She Would Never Have Children (Photos) / My Wife Is Adulterous: Advice Needed-long Post (2) (3) (4)

(1) (2) (3) (4) (5) (6) (7) (8) (9) (Reply) (Go Down)

Re: My Wife Is Surprising Me; She Is Now A Direct Opposite Of Whom I Thought She Was by Czarina21(f): 4:17pm On Mar 12, 2022
JONNYSPUTE:
... It's very wrong to bring in other people's kids into your home and be taking care of them when you ve not even started your own family.
Your wife is so right on that and I think she is trying to protect both you and her unborn kids.
But you can still render help to your relatives without putting her on the know.

Not letting her know can spell a lot of ruin.
Chances are that a lot of women who truly love their man can help him manage his income without being spendthrift. And many of them contribute secretly to get the wheels rolling.

1 Like

Re: My Wife Is Surprising Me; She Is Now A Direct Opposite Of Whom I Thought She Was by Richy4(m): 4:18pm On Mar 12, 2022
Hassanmaye:

Nawaoo that is why this marriage of a thing I'm still thinking I swear
Don't over think it... It's a good thing if u find a compatible lady...

Someone that completes your sentences before u even started...
Though there are sacrifices to make... EG
You wanna watch soccer and she wants to watch something else at the same time..and the TV in the sitting room is better than the one in the bedroom. Someone has to bend right?...
This might sound funny but this little minor stuffs can really escalate into big issues.. smiley

But hey buddy, don't be scared... When you see her, u will know immediately..

2 Likes

Re: My Wife Is Surprising Me; She Is Now A Direct Opposite Of Whom I Thought She Was by expert1(m): 4:19pm On Mar 12, 2022
She is obviously protecting you from a downfall.
You think if you go broke people will help you?
I am not saying you shouldn't help but don't make us think your wifey is a bad person.

Besides, your name is not El-shaddai except you want to die of helping everybody.

2 Likes

Re: My Wife Is Surprising Me; She Is Now A Direct Opposite Of Whom I Thought She Was by JONNYSPUTE(m): 4:21pm On Mar 12, 2022
Czarina21:


Not letting her know can spell a lot of ruin.
Chances are that a lot of women who truly love their man can help him manage his income without being spendthrift. And many of them contribute secretly to get the wheels rolling.
... Then,what do you want the young man to do since the wife doesn't wasn't to reason with him?
Re: My Wife Is Surprising Me; She Is Now A Direct Opposite Of Whom I Thought She Was by airsaylongcome: 4:23pm On Mar 12, 2022
Cyntie55:
At the bolded, if you read the op post very well, you would understand that he's not really financially buoyant, But with the little he has, he wants to help people.

That was why I made references to Obi Cubana and that boy. If you're kind.. You're kind naturally. Kind people don't fake it. Whether they're rich or poor you can't fake it.

Back to your question: Since his wife is not happy with him about being good to people, that was why I said he can sponsor them for distance and he shouldn't allow his wife to obstruct his blessings coming his way.

Better living conditions does not mean living in affluence. It could be living in a house with running water instead of going to a stream to draw water
Re: My Wife Is Surprising Me; She Is Now A Direct Opposite Of Whom I Thought She Was by Czarina21(f): 4:32pm On Mar 12, 2022
JONNYSPUTE:
... Then,what do you want the young man to do since the wife doesn't wasn't to reason with him?

Kind sir,
He should be honest if he can carry the financial burden without stressing anyone. I know he's trying to be helpful in times like this but the wife is seeing that there's no financial security and maybe she doesn't want those kids to come and suffer.
What if they are managing and unable to meet up the parents of those children will call them wicked and inconsiderate.

1 Like

Re: My Wife Is Surprising Me; She Is Now A Direct Opposite Of Whom I Thought She Was by pansophist(m): 4:43pm On Mar 12, 2022
Listen to your wife comrade. You may detest her fake dressing of philanthropy before marriage, but the truism in her point can not be ignored. The surest path to death is choosing not to see the angle of the other just because you not agree with it. I'll fault her for faking philanthropy since it's appealing to you and probably one of the factors why you decided to wife her up, but her point is valid.

Firstly, help people from far. It seems like you operate under the idea that those in need of help are angels and harmless, may I invite you to walk under oshodi bridge at night with money, let's see if those helpless touts won't rip you apart. Infact some of the most deceitful people are those that need help, because when you're low, your threshold for morality will most likely be low as well. Would you rather live in Ajengule or Banana Island? Those below will sacrifice anything, even you, their helper just for the promise of affluence.

The analogy of a drowning man comes to mind. No matter how you want to help him, he will drag you down the water so he can breathe and escape. You're just a tool. Listen to your wife bro, women naturally have the skills of perception, and can feel things that men's logic can not rationalise. Help people but don't bring them inside your house, and burden her with the responsibility to care and perform to people who may come to harm her family later on. Its a cold world out there mate.

11 Likes 1 Share

Re: My Wife Is Surprising Me; She Is Now A Direct Opposite Of Whom I Thought She Was by pocohantas(f): 5:04pm On Mar 12, 2022
Acidosis:
All these years that you have been single (maybe 30 years), you didn't think about accommodating two homeless kids. But now that you're married (maybe less than a year in the marriage), you have suddenly realized how your philanthropic self needs to accommodate two kids. You're ma.d sir.

You want to take in two strangers so your newly married wife can start cooking and washing their clothes when she hasn't fully blended well in that marriage.

Don't expect your wife to live a dream you couldn't achieve yourself in all the years you've been single.

If you want to train two kids, take them to your mother.

Hahahahah. Thank you o.
I had to go back to read that part. He wants to start running an orphanage he didn’t run while he was single and had all the house to himself.

4 Likes 1 Share

Re: My Wife Is Surprising Me; She Is Now A Direct Opposite Of Whom I Thought She Was by MarketDispatch: 5:11pm On Mar 12, 2022
girlygirlyMain:
Why shoud you want your wife to carry the burden of another person's child? If you want to help people help them and be wise enough to keep them out of your home...
Bring 1 or 2 children into your home
What if something happens to them in your house? What if they get kidnapped or fall sick and die in your house? What will you tell the parents? It's like you've not seen problem that is why you want to use your hand to bring it upon yourself...

Unmarried women out here, PRAY that you don't marry a man who lacks wisdom.


0 vote for your comments. I am 100 % sure if those children your husband wants to care for are your siblings, you would not make the above comments.
Re: My Wife Is Surprising Me; She Is Now A Direct Opposite Of Whom I Thought She Was by frozen70(f): 5:14pm On Mar 12, 2022
ElonEmpire:
GoodMorning all ,

I will make this as short as possible.
Before marrying my wife she seems to be this very generous and accommodating fellow . I felt fall in Love with her because this is just the kind of partner I want,

I have not really stand very well financially, though comfortable and contented, but I have this great dream of, because of what I pass through to help as much people as I can.
While dating her, she told me all kinds of stories of her philanthropic and generous gestures to people.

But moving forward to today, she seems to be direct opposite of everything.
She detests people coming close or we offering any kind of help or assistance to family both hers and mine not to talk of friends.

What about suggesting to assist a relative that can't afford, with their child education na war
We have not born but I have more than enough space to bring one or two children to see them through school but my wife is not buying is at all at all.

I know who I am before I marry, this is the only thing that gives me joy, and my only reason for asking God everyday to bless me so that I can bless people.

But right now am seriously confused
it hurts me alot but I don't wanna force anything against her will.

I have tried discussing it over and over with her but she is still not buying it, with the excuse of that we have not stand enough to carry anybody .

What could be her reasons and
What should I do?

That's her nature, but she pretended to tell you that she is friendly and accommodating so that you will see her as your match
Re: My Wife Is Surprising Me; She Is Now A Direct Opposite Of Whom I Thought She Was by JONNYSPUTE(m): 5:17pm On Mar 12, 2022
Czarina21:


Kind sir,
He should be honest if he can carry the financial burden without stressing anyone. I know he's trying to be helpful in times like this but the wife is seeing that there's no financial security and maybe she doesn't want those kids to come and suffer.
What if they are managing and unable to meet up the parents of those children will call them wicked and inconsiderate.
.... I understand the angle you are going to that was why I asked him to shelve the idea of bringing kids that are not theirs into their family.
I also agree with you that the wife might be trying to protect herself and her unborn kids which is very good.
But I believe he can still help if he wants to without his wife knowing as long as it doesn't affect his resources negatively.
Re: My Wife Is Surprising Me; She Is Now A Direct Opposite Of Whom I Thought She Was by Bbbw: 5:22pm On Mar 12, 2022
Oh
Re: My Wife Is Surprising Me; She Is Now A Direct Opposite Of Whom I Thought She Was by Czarina21(f): 5:35pm On Mar 12, 2022
JONNYSPUTE:
.... I understand the angle you are going to that was why I asked him to shelve the idea of bringing kids that are not theirs into their family.
I also agree with you that the wife might be trying to protect herself and her unborn kids which is very good.
But I believe he can still help if he wants to without his wife knowing as long as it doesn't affect his resources negatively.


Well he can keep it from her, but trust me, she'll eventually find out. And then it's downhill from there.
Re: My Wife Is Surprising Me; She Is Now A Direct Opposite Of Whom I Thought She Was by blazepascal(m): 5:36pm On Mar 12, 2022
The women we had then were kind ,generous and loving .I don't know what's happening this days.
Re: My Wife Is Surprising Me; She Is Now A Direct Opposite Of Whom I Thought She Was by Acidosis(m): 5:37pm On Mar 12, 2022
pocohantas:


Hahahahah. Thank you o.
I had to go back to read that part. He wants to start running an orphanage he didn’t run while he was single and had all the house to himself.

You get grin grin
Re: My Wife Is Surprising Me; She Is Now A Direct Opposite Of Whom I Thought She Was by Exceed15: 5:38pm On Mar 12, 2022
Op, I understand how you feel. It appears what gives you joy is gradually dying, no thanks to your wife who staged herself to get what she want.

If you can't take it any longer file for divorce. Your life is bigger than marriage.

1 Like

Re: My Wife Is Surprising Me; She Is Now A Direct Opposite Of Whom I Thought She Was by JONNYSPUTE(m): 5:41pm On Mar 12, 2022
Czarina21:



Well he can keep it from her, but trust me, she'll eventually find out. And then it's downhill from there.
....Meaning he should stop it entirely?. Except he is not bouyant enough to do so,then he should stop but the truth of the matter is that we all need help as humans. Might not be physical cash,but surely we all do need help.
Re: My Wife Is Surprising Me; She Is Now A Direct Opposite Of Whom I Thought She Was by MYHUBBY: 6:00pm On Mar 12, 2022
kayperry:




Mumu, everyman has man benchmark to what he deems fit as financial strength, a man can worth 30m n still claim is not financial capable to marry cos he has a benchmark.
Did you miss the highlighted part, so who are you to doubt or think otherwise, i wil apre8 if you stop using ur wife moniker to quote me, man up




another gibberish of a low IQ, oya continue crying on my own opinion now


dude no wake the other side of me o, I no too gbadun, better go on silent mode like that. I dont have time for this rubbish talk
Re: My Wife Is Surprising Me; She Is Now A Direct Opposite Of Whom I Thought She Was by JONNYSPUTE(m): 6:04pm On Mar 12, 2022
Exceed15:
Op, I understand how you feel. It appears what gives you joy is gradually dying, no thanks to your wife who staged herself to get what she want.

If you can't take it any longer file for divorce. Your life is bigger than marriage.
...Nawa ooh. The way Una dey advocate for divorce here eeh,na only God go save the next generation.
Re: My Wife Is Surprising Me; She Is Now A Direct Opposite Of Whom I Thought She Was by titusmichael27(m): 6:10pm On Mar 12, 2022
Ecclesiastes 10:10 If the iron be blunt, and he do not whet the edge, then must he put to more strength: but wisdom is profitable to direct.
Wait! Let me bring another version.
10 If the ax is dull and its edge unsharpened, more strength is needed, but skill will bring success.
You're the right person to fix this. First, you need to understand that we all have weaknesses.
Is not easy to give arms, trust me my brother, for someone who have not been trained or raised that way, she will find it difficult to do it. My friend is so good with this gift at some points I feel like I've been raised the wrong way.
So with skills much success can come . Pray for her, help her see the reason you're doing this. Be willing to be patient with her while she's going through this process. Love her with all your heart.
Re: My Wife Is Surprising Me; She Is Now A Direct Opposite Of Whom I Thought She Was by dapadawee: 6:24pm On Mar 12, 2022
ElonEmpire:
GoodMorning all ,

I will make this as short as possible.
Before marrying my wife she seems to be this very generous and accommodating fellow . I felt fall in Love with her because this is just the kind of partner I want,

I have not really stand very well financially, though comfortable and contented, but I have this great dream of, because of what I pass through to help as much people as I can.
While dating her, she told me all kinds of stories of her philanthropic and generous gestures to people.

But moving forward to today, she seems to be direct opposite of everything.
She detests people coming close or we offering any kind of help or assistance to family both hers and mine not to talk of friends.

What about suggesting to assist a relative that can't afford, with their child education na war
We have not born but I have more than enough space to bring one or two children to see them through school but my wife is not buying is at all at all.

I know who I am before I marry, this is the only thing that gives me joy, and my only reason for asking God everyday to bless me so that I can bless people.

But right now am seriously confused
it hurts me alot but I don't wanna force anything against her will.

I have tried discussing it over and over with her but she is still not buying it, with the excuse of that we have not stand enough to carry anybody .

What could be her reasons and
What should I do?
Co operate with for now until she align with your wish. Make sure your home is united. If you like give your life to people without your wife consent you will regret later
Re: My Wife Is Surprising Me; She Is Now A Direct Opposite Of Whom I Thought She Was by dapadawee: 6:26pm On Mar 12, 2022
ElonEmpire:
GoodMorning all ,

I will make this as short as possible.
Before marrying my wife she seems to be this very generous and accommodating fellow . I felt fall in Love with her because this is just the kind of partner I want,

I have not really stand very well financially, though comfortable and contented, but I have this great dream of, because of what I pass through to help as much people as I can.
While dating her, she told me all kinds of stories of her philanthropic and generous gestures to people.

But moving forward to today, she seems to be direct opposite of everything.
She detests people coming close or we offering any kind of help or assistance to family both hers and mine not to talk of friends.

What about suggesting to assist a relative that can't afford, with their child education na war
We have not born but I have more than enough space to bring one or two children to see them through school but my wife is not buying is at all at all.

I know who I am before I marry, this is the only thing that gives me joy, and my only reason for asking God everyday to bless me so that I can bless people.

But right now am seriously confused
it hurts me alot but I don't wanna force anything against her will.

I have tried discussing it over and over with her but she is still not buying it, with the excuse of that we have not stand enough to carry anybody .

What could be her reasons and
What should I do?
You know you have good intentions.
Mind you the devil might come in through good intentions too keep your home united nairaland is one hell place to take marital advice
Re: My Wife Is Surprising Me; She Is Now A Direct Opposite Of Whom I Thought She Was by KosiGee(m): 6:33pm On Mar 12, 2022
Kellzzyy:

Mumu


You called him mumu because he gave his opinion? You are the mumu here. You are gullible if you believe all that the op posted.

I’m sure if you hear the wife’s side of the story, you’ll be against this man and his philanthropy.

If you believe him, Send your account no to him, let him start making your weekend a happy one.


@op…..you can show your generosity and philanthropy here. There’s a thread about some lady and a sick child with nothing to eat. Show them love and may God bless you as you do.


I’m not sure what business the op does and the security of his job. It’s nice to show love to people but remember to put something away for the rainy day…the wife might be concerned about his habit. This woman has no child yet,maybe it’s time to focus on having your own children…I’m sure the woman would be happy to have her biological children smiling at her everyday….maybe it’ll open up her kind heart like she used to be.

1 Like

Re: My Wife Is Surprising Me; She Is Now A Direct Opposite Of Whom I Thought She Was by Nobody: 6:36pm On Mar 12, 2022
KosiGee:



You called him mumu because he gave his opinion? You are the mumu here. You are gullible if you believe all that the op posted.

I’m sure if you hear the wife’s side of the story, you’ll be against this man and his philanthropy.

If you believe him, Send your account no to him, let him start making your weekend a happy one.


@op…..you can show your generosity and philanthropy here. There’s a thread about some lady and a sick child with nothing to eat. Show them love and may God bless you as you do.


I’m not sure what business the op does and the security of his job. It’s nice to show love to people but remember to put something away for the rainy day…the wife might be concerned about his habit. This woman has no child yet,maybe it’s time to focus on having your own children…I’m sure the woman would be happy to have her biological children smiling at her everyday….maybe it’ll open up her kind heart like she used to be.
Mumu
Re: My Wife Is Surprising Me; She Is Now A Direct Opposite Of Whom I Thought She Was by Roseey0(f): 7:09pm On Mar 12, 2022
In giving, even your right hand must not know what your left hand is giving...


Na you dey call family meeting ontop giving.

Just do the thing lock up.
I do not announce anything I do for charity. Money na God get am, not me.
Re: My Wife Is Surprising Me; She Is Now A Direct Opposite Of Whom I Thought She Was by TemmyT002(m): 7:26pm On Mar 12, 2022
Most of them pretend a lot before marriage.
That's one of the disadvantages of short term courtship
Re: My Wife Is Surprising Me; She Is Now A Direct Opposite Of Whom I Thought She Was by MYHUBBY: 7:49pm On Mar 12, 2022
kayperry:




olofo ! like i said stop using your wife moniker to quote me.


is Olofo your dad surname? you're fond of using his name but do not bring the poor man to ridicule when I'm pointing out your senselessness



I'm not that civil alaye, caution your dumbness
Re: My Wife Is Surprising Me; She Is Now A Direct Opposite Of Whom I Thought She Was by kayperry: 8:03pm On Mar 12, 2022
MYHUBBY:



is Olofo your dad surname? you're fond of using his name but do not bring the poor man to ridicule when I'm pointing out your senselessness



I'm not that civil alaye, caution your dumbness


Finally, he gives the phone to his wife undecided gud riddance
Re: My Wife Is Surprising Me; She Is Now A Direct Opposite Of Whom I Thought She Was by MYHUBBY: 8:04pm On Mar 12, 2022
kayperry:



Finally, he gives the phone to his wife undecided gud riddance

kindergarten talk, you're just a dead brain attention seeker


go play with toys kid, don't have time for childish tantrum from one brain dead specimen
Re: My Wife Is Surprising Me; She Is Now A Direct Opposite Of Whom I Thought She Was by kayperry: 8:12pm On Mar 12, 2022
Czarina21:



Well he can keep it from her, but trust me, she'll eventually find out. And then it's downhill from there.


Don't just conclude like that, please men vary for instance my woman understands whatever i do with my money is my business so far i meet up with my responsibility to her ..... marriage is like bed for men, and its how you lay your bed you will sleep on it. no caps

(1) (2) (3) (4) (5) (6) (7) (8) (9) (Reply)

Three Powerful Prayers That Could Turn Your Husband Back To God. / “My Husband Is Gay, I Still Beg Him For Sex – Woman / Girl Confesses That Her Mother Gave Her Rat Poison To Put In Her Father's Food

(Go Up)

Sections: politics (1) business autos (1) jobs (1) career education (1) romance computers phones travel sports fashion health
religion celebs tv-movies music-radio literature webmasters programming techmarket

Links: (1) (2) (3) (4) (5) (6) (7) (8) (9) (10)

Nairaland - Copyright © 2005 - 2024 Oluwaseun Osewa. All rights reserved. See How To Advertise. 70
Disclaimer: Every Nairaland member is solely responsible for anything that he/she posts or uploads on Nairaland.