My dad was someone that did a lot of work to earn some properties, and he is always proud of that, before i got married i was staying in one of my dad's house (3bedroom flat), so when it was time for me to get married i decided to rent apartment for me and my wife, because my dad has made it clear to me, not to rely on his properties, to create a life of my own. So i was planning to rent an apartment but my dad insisted on me and my wife taking the apartment and that he will be moving out to another apartment at Lagos.

After a lot of talks, i agreed i got married and me and my wife moved into the house, but my dad did not move out, he still continue staying with us for almost 2years. I can't ask him to leave, the house belong to him, and if he is not leaving as he said, i can't force him. So we continue living with him, he was using a room and we were using two rooms and everything was going fine.

But after i gave birth to my daughter things get different, my wife got occupied with taking care of her daughter, and she is not active as when we got married, but my dad won't understand that. My dad started bringing some unusual attitude like, complaining about my wife unable to cook for him just because she was late for work, complaining about the taste of the food, complaining about her not being helpful to me. He was bringing a lot of complain to extent that my wife was frustrated and tired of living in the house. We tried severally to settle all this issues, inform the family elders but every idea to settle things is not working.

My wife said if i want peace, that we should move out. So i inform my dad of parking out and he reacted badly, he ask me to leave if i really want to leave, that my wife has washed my brain that i was not seeing thing clearly again, so i parked out and rented an apartment. Its been 1year now.

This is now the issue, my dad has left for Lagos since i parked out with my wife, the house is empty, he tried renting it out but nobody was able to rent the apartment. Yesterday he called, he begged me and ask me to move back to the house, that the house belongs to me, that he was working all this years because of me and my brother, being the first son, i need to claim the house, that the community association were complaining about leaving the house empty is not a good idea.

My wife is not in support of moving back, and i feel i should not go against my father's wish. Please help out, what do i do?

My opinion really won't change your predicament but I'll be honest with you.

First i respect you for standing up for your wife.

Your dad is not the husband, he has no reason to complain over the taste of your wife cook.

If you are capable of always meeting up with your wife wishes, and the house rent.

I don't see any reason why you need to go back.

I am a kind of man that doesn't play with my happiness

If you love your wife and she loves you.

Your dad is not seeing the happiness between you and your wife.

And your wife is not meant to please him in any way other than to respect him.


Your dad needs to know that your a man.

House shouldn't be the only legacy he thinks it's best for you.

Your wife try by living with your father in the first Instance....
DNT go back to the house, find a way to rent it out yourself since your father can't. Afterall, he said the property is yours.
Rent it out and be collecting the rent and stay where you are, you father is trying to drag you and your wife back in again.

princeemmma:
My dad was someone that did a lot of work to earn some properties, and he is always proud of that, before i got married i was staying in one of my dad's house (3bedroom flat), so when it was time for me to get married i decided to rent apartment for me and my wife, because my dad has made it clear to me, not to rely on his properties, to create a life of my own. So i was planning to rent an apartment but my dad insisted on me and my wife taking the apartment and that he will be moving out to another apartment at Lagos.

After a lot of talks, i agreed i got married and me and my wife moved into the house, but my dad did not move out, he still continue staying with us for almost 2years. I can't ask him to leave, the house belong to him, and if he is not leaving as he said, i can't force him. So we continue living with him, he was using a room and we were using two rooms and everything was going fine.

But after i gave birth to my daughter things get different, my wife got occupied with taking care of her daughter, and she is not active as when we got married, but my dad won't understand that. My dad started bringing some unusual attitude like, complaining about my wife unable to cook for him just because she was late for work, complaining about the taste of the food, complaining about her not being helpful to me. He was bringing a lot of complain to extent that my wife was frustrated and tired of living in the house. We tried severally to settle all this issues, inform the family elders but every idea to settle things is not working.

My wife said if i want peace, that we should move out. So i inform my dad of parking out and he reacted badly, he ask me to leave if i really want to leave, that my wife has washed my brain that i was not seeing thing clearly again, so i parked out and rented an apartment. Its been 1year now.

This is now the issue, my dad has left for Lagos since i parked out with my wife, the house is empty, he tried renting it out but nobody was able to rent the apartment. Yesterday he called, he begged me and ask me to move back to the house, that the house belongs to me, that he was working all this years because of me and my brother, being the first son, i need to claim the house, that the community association were complaining about leaving the house empty is not a good idea.

My wife is not in support of moving back, and i feel i should not go against my father's wish. Please help out, what do i do?

U can go back if u want to and save urself from paying rent. However, tell ur dad not to be a burden to ur wife. Weda she sabi cook or not, she is ur choice.

You should consider moving back there if:

1. He’s not coming back to the house ( which means you fully occupy all 3 rooms)
2. It helps you save money on rent
3. There are no potentially toxic situations (like nosy neighbors who could open sour wounds for your wife)

What guarantee do you have that when you move back to the house, your dad won't come visiting and from there, stay back and don't forget that the house still belongs to him?

Look into renting out the property yourself.

OP....
I wouldn't go back if I were in your shoes ...
I'd rather rent out the place and use the money to augment my finance ...

.

REDUCE THE RENT AMOUNT SOMEONE WILL RENT IT AND PAY TO YOU, YOU CAN NOW ADD MONEY TO THAT TO PAY YOUR OWN RENT
JUST REDUCE THE RENT SOMEONE WILL TAKE IT

The Very day you got married automatically made you a man. And I repeat nobody should blackmail you but instead a logical discussion is what you are after. Be it your parents or your wife.
Your old man broke the deal ,and you acted right.
Now they are things you don't carry for long because we all make mistakes.
What makes you a man is how deep your pocket is. Do you think the money you use in paying rentage and service charge can be saved and you starting up your own project or can you still pay the rentage and as well start up your own project.
Determination is the key, clear your wife properly on why you need to move back, definitely she won't agree and try to blackmail you but I told you earlier on the course of my introduction, use the next Rent to acquire a land and start your own building with a fixed time of completion. Trust me you go dey alright.
And for the part you saying not going against your father wish is plain nonsense same applies to your wife , you are now a man not his boy, you better choose what suits you.

princeemmma:
My dad was someone that did a lot of work to earn some properties, and he is always proud of that, before i got married i was staying in one of my dad's house (3bedroom flat), so when it was time for me to get married i decided to rent apartment for me and my wife, because my dad has made it clear to me, not to rely on his properties, to create a life of my own. So i was planning to rent an apartment but my dad insisted on me and my wife taking the apartment and that he will be moving out to another apartment at Lagos.

After a lot of talks, i agreed i got married and me and my wife moved into the house, but my dad did not move out, he still continue staying with us for almost 2years. I can't ask him to leave, the house belong to him, and if he is not leaving as he said, i can't force him. So we continue living with him, he was using a room and we were using two rooms and everything was going fine.

But after i gave birth to my daughter things get different, my wife got occupied with taking care of her daughter, and she is not active as when we got married, but my dad won't understand that. My dad started bringing some unusual attitude like, complaining about my wife unable to cook for him just because she was late for work, complaining about the taste of the food, complaining about her not being helpful to me. He was bringing a lot of complain to extent that my wife was frustrated and tired of living in the house. We tried severally to settle all this issues, inform the family elders but every idea to settle things is not working.

My wife said if i want peace, that we should move out. So i inform my dad of parking out and he reacted badly, he ask me to leave if i really want to leave, that my wife has washed my brain that i was not seeing thing clearly again, so i parked out and rented an apartment. Its been 1year now.

This is now the issue, my dad has left for Lagos since i parked out with my wife, the house is empty, he tried renting it out but nobody was able to rent the apartment. Yesterday he called, he begged me and ask me to move back to the house, that the house belongs to me, that he was working all this years because of me and my brother, being the first son, i need to claim the house, that the community association were complaining about leaving the house empty is not a good idea.

My wife is not in support of moving back, and i feel i should not go against my father's wish. Please help out, what do i do?

Abeg where is the apartment, someone wants to rent.




@ topic, get your Dad a wife, he's lonely.

Dont look back

Your dad isn't like most fathers-in-law.

They're very mature, and devoid of petty issues as you've recounted.

*****************
I know the lure of living in a "free" house, but so long as there's the potential of your dad returning to that house, please don't return.

You're more dignified living away from that house.

Saintmary:




Abeg where is the apartment, someone wants to rent.




@ topic, get your Dad a wife, he's lonely.

He can get u for d dad

Don't go back. What if your father decides to move back in? Will you tell him not to stay in his house? Rent the house out. You don't have to live in it.

emmanuelbrown26:

He can get u for d dad

Give him your Mummy.

Saintmary:




Give him your Mummy.

Mum na old cargo na, en papa need somebody younger than mum

emmanuelbrown26:

Mum na old cargo na, en papa need somebody younger than mum

How can you describe your own mother, the woman who birthed you as old cargo?



Her old and exhausted body, was it not due to working so hard to keep you alive during your dependent years?


Even if this is a place where no one knows anyone, is it too difficult for you to place some honor on your own parents?



No one is asking you to respect strangers, but man, the name you gave your mother is horrible!



I was expecting you to insult me thoroughly just because I mentioned your mother but see what you replied with.



Well, I am not your type o, I value my parents above everything and I avoid people who don't.



So, abeg, stay away from me and my posts henceforth.

Saintmary:



How can you describe your own mother, the woman who birthed you as old cargo?



Her old and exhausted body, was it not due to working so hard to keep you alive during your dependent years?


Even if this is a place where no one knows anyone, is it too difficult for you to place some honor on your own parents?



No one is asking you to respect strangers, but man, the name you gave your mother is horrible!



I was expecting you to insult me thoroughly just because I mentioned your mother but see what you replied with.



Well, I am not your type o, I value my parents above everything and I avoid people who don't.



So, abeg, stay away from me and my posts henceforth.

Shut up

Saintmary:



How can you describe your own mother, the woman who birthed you as old cargo?



Her old and exhausted body, was it not due to working so hard to keep you alive during your dependent years?


Even if this is a place where no one knows anyone, is it too difficult for you to place some honor on your own parents?



No one is asking you to respect strangers, but man, the name you gave your mother is horrible!



I was expecting you to insult me thoroughly just because I mentioned your mother but see what you replied with.



Well, I am not your type o, I value my parents above everything and I avoid people who don't.



So, abeg, stay away from me and my posts henceforth.

I still maintain that u should grab d opportunity of becoming mother inlaw to op before its too late. Grab this opportunity while it's lasts