INFIDELITY IN MARRIAGE, IS THERE ANY CURE?

The rate of infidelity in marriage is becoming too alarming these days and mostly, men are the culprit!

Based on personal conviction I can say that 90% of married men have at one point in time engaged in extra marital affairs. Out of the remaining 10%, 8% are not caught yet and the reaming 2% are scarce if at all they exist!

Most married women, at least 50% must have caught their hubbies at one point in time and some men have confessed to their wives of their involvement with other women. At times you sit down and wonder what these men are looking for outside their homes.

A friend recently shared her experience with me. She caught her husband in the act and the man owned up to the fact that he has been dating these other girl few days after their marriage and he asked for forgiveness. At first the woman found it hard to forgive her husband but she later did. But to her astonishment four months later she saw a text message of another girlfriend asking her husband if he got home safely after spending the weekend with her in Abuja leaving the wife and two children all alone at home under the pretext of traveling on official duties. The woman could not take it any longer and packed out of her matrimonial home taking the children with her.
Another newly wedded lady said she discovered that her husband was having an affair with a married woman with kids when she hasn’t even got one as at the time!

Many homes have been broken this way because of extra marital affairs. Atimes a woman may not see packing out of her matrimonial home as a solution on her own accord but if the other woman uses diabolical means the real wife might be forced out of her home.

Moreover, your wife may not leave but you have broken her heart somehow and it may be hard to love and trust you again. Some women may not forgive but retaliate and I wonder how you will feel when you discover your wife is having an affair. Also after the discovery that they are not the only women in your life, some women would pretend as if all is well but within them my brother you are on your own! All the love, care, attention, devotion e.t.c given to you when they feel they have no rival would be reduced or totally withdrawn and be diverted to their children. Is that a home? A place where there is no peace, harmony and unity.

Unfortunately that is the kind of home many men are building. You may think you don’t have anything to lose, after all if she is not cooperating you can find solace outside from a woman who is more beautiful than your wife and somebody who can even help you financially. But, listen to me you cannot go far without the support of your wife because she is the only helper God created for you and it is with her support and prayer that you would have help from other people. And if you want to obtain favour from God, be true to your wife. I don’t understand why men don’t put all this into consideration before gallivanting around.

A Dr. explained that women have the same anatomy, so what are these men looking for?
Can somebody please explain to me what the problem is?
What is the position of God concerning Adultery?
Morally is it ok?
Socially is it acceptable?
Spiritually?
Is there any drug that can remove the cataract called lust from the eyes of our married men?

On a last note, my advice to our men is that they should try as much as possible to run away from infidelity because of the way God looks at adultery and the penalty for it.
for the sake of their children and home and lastly
because many destiny have been sacrificed on the altar of adultery.

@poster
b4 i can answer ur questns fully i) are u a man or woman? ii) r u married?

anyway uv already mentiond how God views Adultery
socially i think its acceptable if not why r pple no longer ashamed?
a drug? i dont think that would solve the problem
but morally & spritualy i bliev its wrong

yes there is cure,
let man marry more than one wifey.
before you trow stone at me, know that
every man is poligamous in mind

na god go intervene
but to be factual
if u are not ready then dont go into the wedlock
thats my view

@Rawphyhat true talk
Na really God fit save person
If ur not ready to stick to ur partner dont get married!
Hooha

women of today are one major problem that drives  men into adultry

1 they will not allow you to have wifey no two

2 they dont know how to take good care of their men

3 they tend to forget the husband when they have children

4 some of them dont even know how to take good care of themselves after marriage etc

rawphyat,
wellcome to nairaland

@ Ose

You have won the award as the Nairaland Sexist.

Please go to hell to collect it!

@ClimieNH89 kisses 4 u
@Osereka

well am not suprised
WOMEN HATE TRUTH

Weebee,
I think the statistic you quoted is misleading. To me it spoil a good work. Facts mingled with fantasies.

To the question, there is cure. However, it is just like sickness. If you are sick, you must admit you are sick. Else nothing the doctor do can help you. How many are willing to admit their sickness?

After acepting you are sick, and you are given prescriptions, you must use it as advised. If a man can follow those simple steps, he can be cured.

@topic poster, where did you get your stats from?

ClimieNH89:

@ Ose

You have won the award as the Nairaland Sexist.

Please go to hell to collect it!

seconded.
the guy osereka  needs help

Some women had had some  sort of "quick solutions" to their husbands cheating ways.
A woman here in the USA in the nineties used a sharp kitchen knife and sliced off the man's 'dangling yekini' while he slept.
and they found it in a nearby field and sewed it on.
Only God knows of what use it is

Another used superglue and glued her spouse's "abunna"  unto the his lower abdomen and the accompanying jewels to the  right and left inner thighs.
It took a team of trained doctors,nurses and paramedics to release his "things"

I'm not advocating any of the above but women out there should know they have options LOL

Osereka or whatever the hell u guys call urselves u r really bleeped up and I pray ur wivess cheat on u.
Wonder why wo0men waste time discussing issues like this.
If ur man cheats on u pay back in kind.
I assure u it feels good.

make man piss de waka, make woman piss de waka,
one person leg go wet pass the other

+osisi,

are you serious about those cases you mentioned? And what happened to the men? Hope the kini stopped terrorising the neighbourhood? Pls tell us more. Maybe a wonder lady in Naija might pick it up. What do you think?

lol osisi, Lorraine Bobitt is my hero

that issue is too one sided what about women
the 80% men do it with 80% women/Ladies
she youknow

Here is what God says on Adultery - a whole chapter prov 7 is dedicated to it and is even titled - "Warning Against the Adulteress" :

[list]
[li]Proverbs 6:32-33 ³² But a man who commits adultery lacks judgment;
       whoever does so destroys himself. ³³ Blows and disgrace are his lot,
       and his shame will never be wiped away[/li]
[li]Proverbs 7:27 ²⁷ Her house is a highway to the grave,
       leading down to the chambers of death. [/li]
[/list]

http://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?book_id=24&chapter=6&version=31

http://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Proverbs%207;&version=31;

the only cure to infidelity in marriage is God
when men and women put the fear of God first in whatsoever they, do they will reverence God and not do things that are displeasing to him.

another angle i will say is that maybe they make too much money that is why they go after other women to make them feel good and spend the money or they dont have money and they go after other women to get money to make ends meet
atimes u realy cant just pick the reason why the lust of the eye has control over man

osereka:

make man piss de waka, make woman piss de waka,
one person leg go wet pass the other

i hope u wont fall a victim of infidelity
cos its can destroy either the man or woman emotionally for life

@ olanajim,the cases are documented.
Mr Bobbit had his "John Thomas" reattached but I doubt if he's still terrorizing anybody
The other man just endured the pain of deglueing his "things"

although the rate of infidelity is actually allarming,it is not as high as u r making it appear.there are still men who will remain faithful to their wife no matter the enticement outside.it depends on what u really want to do.
to the solution- since women seems to be the one that suffer most,they should do every thing to keep their husbands.
women should not forget those things they do when in courthship that keep their husband coming back to them even when their are millions of ohter beautiful women-the numerous hugs, compliments,gifts,carefully made dishes,clean and well scented rooms,extra touches of make up etc.
above all,women should pray always pray for their homes and husbands.they should speak positively about their husband in their absence and in their presnce.

Weewee and narzert both got it wrong with their one-sided assertions on this issue. The shocking revlation is that more women are into adultery in marriage than men. Because the society frowns on that of women and wrongfully celebrates thatof men is one of the major reasons why women culprits get away with it. Most men are of the wrong opinion that their wives are saints, so they do not bother take take time to ask: what is this woman really doing behind me!

Most women also encourage thier spouses to do this due to their persistent complain when it comes to performing their matrimonial role. Head ache, I'm tired, is that the only thing you know, the pocket money is insufficient and you are asking for sex, etc. Meanwhile there are millions of women, both married & singles willing to offer the man for as little as the cost of a meal! With due regards, The features of the mummy at home are ageing, sagging and not as supple as that of the university girl out there who needs some fatcat to finance her wears, exceses and still hold some coins.

The bible is very clear on the issue of infidelity and adultery. So be not deceived. God does not speak idle words. Read the posts above on what God says on it. Also read Proverbs 5: 1-23.

If you want to test if your woman does it, in this era of GSM, all you need is to follow the rather petty but effective means of finding out on a cheating partner. Go through the list of regular callers (into and out) of yr lady's phone, see the details of some texts, both incoming and outgoing. Caution here: if you are not emotionally matured, don't do it, I plead with you. Call some of those names you dont know closely as her friend, you will discover that the entry tagged Janet on her phone really has a man at the other end!

When the phone rings in your presence and she suddenly cuts it for no just cause, watchout. Try getting the number, call it and you will see what I'm saying.
I would want to see the responses here. Guys over to you. I really want to share your feedbacks, so we know who is doing what.

word

goes to show that your women are mere weaklings with no respect for themselves.

@Poster

Yes, there is a cure, but it all depends on individuals.

I would like to correct an impression here and that is, It is a human thing. Infidelity is not only found or rampant amongst men, even women are also into it and it is a 50-50% rate.

Personally, i believe that there are reasons for every actions we carry. If i am infidel, what are my reasons for it. If a woman's man is becoming infidel, i guess the woman should check herself there is something that seems not right. Most times there are insensitivity between couples to the needs of their partners. We believe too much that when there are needs it should be fronted, sometimes you need to check and ask what your needs are.

I don't know if it is aceptable in the Bible/Koran
Socially its dirty from my own perspective

Well, packing out of the man's home as a sign of annoyance is bullshit. You have just granted a visa to proper INFIDELITY

Regards

May God save our marriages otherwise somebody will turn mad while thinking of the Infidelity in the world of today. In the days of our fathers it was not like this but men and women(expecially Men) nowadays are something else and i attribute it to coping the western celebrity way of life. Its only God that can save us.

A and E aired it not too long ago AGAIN, lol. osisis, I would prefer Ivana Trump's style 

Weebee,
Note and consider the following points;
1. All male creatures of God are polygamous by nature.Think of the animals-from Lizards to Lions.The arrangement is one male, sexually overseeing several females in a location called "territory".Any male intruder is fought to a standstill.One must leave for the other.Unfortunately,the same "gene" runs in Homo Sapiens.However,due to religious and social influences,man has managed to be "civilized" about his sexual conduct.But that urge to try other females lurks somewhere waiting for the opportunity to manifest.This is the truth.A married man who has plenty of cash will have several such opportunities presenting.Unfortunatley, a man's willpower is insufficient to stop him from adultery when trully challenged.The only guarantee against adultery is the power of the Holy Spirit which is given only to believers.Adultery can only be cured supernaturally and never naturally.A man who is not born again and is not commiting adultery-its either he has not been challenged enough or he does not have the requisite wherewithal.period.

2. Unfortunately also,the incidence of adultery in women has shot up recently.Its inexplicable,but its happening.It's much more common than most people think.Its just that women are much more discrete about their affairs and they tend to stick to one extramarital partner for long.

3. Finally I want to submit that even marriage is not a cure for promiscuity.If that is one's reason for getting married,he or she will be sorely disappointed.I have seen men who are thoroughly satisfied sexually by their spouses and yet they commit adultery,and vice versa.

presido1:

May God save our marriages otherwise somebody will turn mad while thinking of the Infidelity in the world of today. In the days of our fathers it was not like this but men and women(expecially Men) nowadays are something else and i attribute it to coping the western celebrity way of life. Its only God that can save us.

In the days of our grandfathers and great grand fathers it was fashionable to have several wives at the man's disposal and even make a roster for sleeping arrangements as though it were a menu.He had ukazi soup on monday and ogbono on tuesday . Rather than cheat,the odogwu married the mistress,7 women for 7 nights.
That is no better.
He's still cheating on his first wife.

another men basher. Are men really unfaithful with men or women? Change your thread to. MEN ARE CHEATS OR DOGS? Tell the whole story, men do it with women ok.

Personally I also believe some men cheat out of frustration for example job stress can make a man cheat.For all the men out there who are cheating on the wives I implore them to be very careful .