I hate people like you, no matter how little the gift might be, you should have accepted it, I don’t reject gifts even if it’s gari and pure water

PuZZyNegro:


It's not about it being local or little. The Bread was gotten from Market Square super market. I just find it awkward giving bread to your son-in-law to be on the first meeting.

Gifts are symbolic you know.

This is total unintelligent. You showed them the type of in law you'll be. I collect such gifts and discard them on my way if I was scared.

There's some element of abnormal pride in you.

FalseProphet1:
That marriage will not hold.

This I have seen.

FalseProphet1:
That marriage will not hold.

This I have seen.

Calm down

What did your family member that accompanied you say?

PuZZyNegro:
I traveled from Lagos to Port Harcourt to see my future in laws family. My girl wasn't around as she's still in Lagos schooling.

I went there with a family member and got them some items like shortcake biscuits and juice.

They offered us food and we ate. After the meeting and normal questioning, we were set to go when surprisingly, this people brought out two loaves of bread and gave us. I told them that the food we ate was enough, that we don't need the bread.

We haven't even gone far when my girl started texting me on WhatsApp angrily asking me why I rejected her mother's gift. That she gave it out of love, this and that.

I told her that bread is the wrongest gift the mother could give me. I am supposed to buy them bread and not the one way round. I intentionally refused to buy bread for them because I assumed bread is an everyday food that people buy and eat, so I decided to go with the package biscuits instead and here they are offering me bread.

If it were something produced locally by them like coconut or something, I can understand but bread?

Please, did I do anything wrong rejecting the bread?

PuZZyNegro:
I traveled from Lagos to Port Harcourt to see my future in laws family. My girl wasn't around as she's still in Lagos schooling.

I went there with a family member and got them some items like shortcake biscuits and juice.

They offered us food and we ate. After the meeting and normal questioning, we were set to go when surprisingly, this people brought out two loaves of bread and gave us. I told them that the food we ate was enough, that we don't need the bread.

We haven't even gone far when my girl started texting me on WhatsApp angrily asking me why I rejected her mother's gift. That she gave it out of love, this and that.

I told her that bread is the wrongest gift the mother could give me. I am supposed to buy them bread and not the one way round. I intentionally refused to buy bread for them because I assumed bread is an everyday food that people buy and eat, so I decided to go with the package biscuits instead and here they are offering me bread.

If it were something produced locally by them like coconut or something, I can understand but bread?

Please, did I do anything wrong rejecting the bread?

U shouldn't have rejected d bread bro

You are emotionally unintelligent

PuZZyNegro:
I traveled from Lagos to Port Harcourt to see my future in laws family. My girl wasn't around as she's still in Lagos schooling.

I went there with a family member and got them some items like shortcake biscuits and juice.

They offered us food and we ate. After the meeting and normal questioning, we were set to go when surprisingly, this people brought out two loaves of bread and gave us. I told them that the food we ate was enough, that we don't need the bread.

We haven't even gone far when my girl started texting me on WhatsApp angrily asking me why I rejected her mother's gift. That she gave it out of love, this and that.

I told her that bread is the wrongest gift the mother could give me. I am supposed to buy them bread and not the one way round. I intentionally refused to buy bread for them because I assumed bread is an everyday food that people buy and eat, so I decided to go with the package biscuits instead and here they are offering me bread.

If it were something produced locally by them like coconut or something, I can understand but bread?

Please, did I do anything wrong rejecting the bread?

Yes & No.
Yes, you could have just taken it along with you back.
No, why take it when you wouldn’t eat it . That would be a waste.

OP you lack wisdom. You shouldn't have rejected her gift. Your girl was right to get angry with you. You just sent a very wrong message to your In-laws that you are a very proud person. If you were the one that got your mother-in-law something and she welcomed you with rejection, what will be your reaction then?

1. The lady should have informed her "husband to be" about the "tribal" significance attached to gift items

2. Both parties (in law) and the young man, are not wrong, however, it depends on the weight of reaction from both sides

3. The supposed "breach of protocol" is not sufficient to threaten the union, and if it does, it simply means "someone" is not accepted.

yoniehuin:


Na man you be

You know your worth and i like your courage

Giving a visitor 2 slice of bread is an insult and not a good thing

Abeg where u see 2 slice of bread

It's 2 loaves

PuZZyNegro:


It's not about it being local or little. The Bread was gotten from Market Square super market. I just find it awkward giving bread to your son-in-law to be on the first meeting.

Gifts are symbolic you know.

And you are still arguing, instead of you to humble yourself and take correction.
It was very rude to reject such a gift.

PuZZyNegro:
I traveled from Lagos to Port Harcourt to see my future in laws family. My girl wasn't around as she's still in Lagos schooling.

I went there with a family member and got them some items like shortcake biscuits and juice.

They offered us food and we ate. After the meeting and normal questioning, we were set to go when surprisingly, this people brought out two loaves of bread and gave us. I told them that the food we ate was enough, that we don't need the bread.

We haven't even gone far when my girl started texting me on WhatsApp angrily asking me why I rejected her mother's gift. That she gave it out of love, this and that.

I told her that bread is the wrongest gift the mother could give me. I am supposed to buy them bread and not the one way round. I intentionally refused to buy bread for them because I assumed bread is an everyday food that people buy and eat, so I decided to go with the package biscuits instead and here they are offering me bread.

If it were something produced locally by them like coconut or something, I can understand but bread?

Please, did I do anything wrong rejecting the bread?

Another attended attention seeking g story. Your beb dey Lagos,you travel from Lagos come see her people without her presence. Try another stpy story line bro.

Go for proper orientation before making any step. U have alot to learn

Maybe collect one loave if you felt it was too much

PuZZyNegro:


You guys are just foaming in the mouth. These people already served us food and we ate.

I don't really think we need bread again to take home.

Biola67:
Maybe the mama see how you quick chop the first food finish .. she see say you dey hungry

No be lie, from Lagos to ph no be small journey, the guy eyes go don go inside, abeg I no fit laugh

PuZZyNegro:


It's not about it being local or little. The Bread was gotten from Market Square super market. I just find it awkward giving bread to your son-in-law to be on the first meeting.

Gifts are symbolic you know.

Stop arguing . You are here to ask for advice . Even if they offer you akara , you collect ! You will come off as above their gift ! If you reach outside and you gift the bread to a begger , it is better than rejecting it .


PS - Biscuit and Juice ?! Like really? All the way from Lagos ?! Alaye , you fall hand small . Better to buy small fabric for the mom and a bottle of fruit wine for the papa . And you have the balls to reject the bread ! Baba you funny gan

FalseProphet1:
That marriage will not hold.

This I have seen.

Lolz! Pastor in making

PuZZyNegro:


It's not about it being local or little. The Bread was gotten from Market Square super market. I just find it awkward giving bread to your son-in-law to be on the first meeting.

Gifts are symbolic you know.

Lol what is the symbol of the bread dey gave to you lol.? Did they force you to eat the bread? Maybe you should have told her to go and bring locally produced bread....ITK

You should have just collected it, many times we pretend and and show happiness for little gifts, even gifts we do not like, to show appreciation and to make the other person feel good.

Marriage is for those who are mentally mature.
You're already destroying this Marriage before even the wedding.
Brother, go and learn from the Elders.

Just imagine. You went to visit your in laws for the first time with biscuit. WHAT!
Then you rejected their own gift. WHAT!!. Highest f up bro.

You did the right thing because actually you supposed to buy bread and them gifting you bread doesn't go well. Are they expecting you to go back to Lagos with bread? Don't they've something like garri

PuZZyNegro:
I traveled from Lagos to Port Harcourt to see my future in laws family. My girl wasn't around as she's still in Lagos schooling.

I went there with a family member and got them some items like shortcake biscuits and juice.

They offered us food and we ate. After the meeting and normal questioning, we were set to go when surprisingly, this people brought out two loaves of bread and gave us. I told them that the food we ate was enough, that we don't need the bread.

We haven't even gone far when my girl started texting me on WhatsApp angrily asking me why I rejected her mother's gift. That she gave it out of love, this and that.

I told her that bread is the wrongest gift the mother could give me. I am supposed to buy them bread and not the one way round. I intentionally refused to buy bread for them because I assumed bread is an everyday food that people buy and eat, so I decided to go with the package biscuits instead and here they are offering me bread.

If it were something produced locally by them like coconut or something, I can understand but bread?

Please, did I do anything wrong rejecting the bread?

You never ready to marry. Go and marry symbols. How old are you though

The fact that you refused to BUY THEM BREAD, is the reason they offered you bread while you were leaving.
you should at least seek advises from Elderly and experienced men whenever matters of marital affairs comes up.
You don't assume or use your city knowledge in doing things alone.
Most of our city life styles is archaic to these village dwellers.
Many village dwellers love bread, especially when the bread is sliced or coming from inter state.
Till date, whenever am visiting my in-laws, i still buy them bread and they appreciate it so much.

you need to grow up and be matured.
to me, you never ripe for marriage o.
you need to learn a lot of traditions.

pharmaking:
Small boy carry biscuits go in-law house on a first visit.

That also is not only weird but awkward to me.

Yeye dey smell.Better call mama and apologise.

Wrongest gift indeed

He dey look for supporter luckily he don get one up there.

Kajaard:
You did not apply emotional intelligence at all.

Yes, you should have collected the bread.

Most African parents/ In laws et al might think you are disrespectful by rejecting their gift.

This is not the western world. You should have collected the bread no matter how local or little it looks. Cheers.

Yeah, emotional intelligence

onedayatime:
did the OP wrote that he does not like eating bread? He felt the bread was too common to be a parting gift but he thought in all his wisdom that shortcake biscuit is a rare gem gift for his potential inlaws who still accepted it from him with open mind....

the person I quoted said even if u don't like it

PuZZyNegro:
I traveled from Lagos to Port Harcourt to see my future in laws family. My girl wasn't around as she's still in Lagos schooling.

I went there with a family member and got them some items like shortcake biscuits and juice.

They offered us food and we ate. After the meeting and normal questioning, we were set to go when surprisingly, this people brought out two loaves of bread and gave us. I told them that the food we ate was enough, that we don't need the bread.

We haven't even gone far when my girl started texting me on WhatsApp angrily asking me why I rejected her mother's gift. That she gave it out of love, this and that.

I told her that bread is the wrongest gift the mother could give me. I am supposed to buy them bread and not the one way round. I intentionally refused to buy bread for them because I assumed bread is an everyday food that people buy and eat, so I decided to go with the package biscuits instead and here they are offering me bread.

If it were something produced locally by them like coconut or something, I can understand but bread?

Please, did I do anything wrong rejecting the bread?

What did you want or expect...?
Her spare daughter....?!
Could av taken the loaf and left

thesicilian:
Find a way to remedy the situation. In some cultures you rejecting a gift is almost as bad as rejecting the gift giver. And then you made it worse by telling the daughter that it was the wrongest gift they could give you. Who does that? Do you think your biscuits and juice they accepted wholeheartedly from you they couldn't afford to get them on their own if they wanted to?

No mind the kolo. I too know nai be him problem. His gift is the best and the future inlaws own is awkward. How person go buy biscuits for in-laws? Do elderly ppl eat biscuits and juice?