I'm a south african who's been in & out of a relationship wit this Nigerian man for 5yrs. He went to get hiv tested, was happy with the results then decided to settle down that's how we got back together. Our relationship got more serious than before.

Now I recently found out that he slept wit my sister same day I was telling my sister how we were planning to get married & looking up on her seeking sisterly advise. It broke my heart they both said it was a mistake but my sister later confessed she did it intentionally because she felt she was living under my shadow. All this has passed I got back wit him but part of me still hurting,sometimes I feel that I made a huge mistake by taking him back. things got more serious than ever. We engaged & he talks about starting a family. He is kind & loving & very good wit my son he actually takes him as his own he is even plannin on changing his surname once we get married he asked me to leave my job & manages 1 of his businesses of which I did. Yet deep down I feel that I would have listened to my heart more before I made rational decisions, I still feel hurt by what happened, everynight the memories still haunt me down. I'm not yet healed & I don't know how to pull through this.

Please help.

Confused

if your not yet healed then you havent forgave him yet.do not let your thoughts get in the way of what your heart has been telling you all along.its not worth it. if your asking yourself then its not worth it.its ok to be alone and live for your child.that should be your main concern.

he cheated on you once,he'll do it again!
Forgive him if you want and can live with what he did and marry him if you think he's the best but think it through and through before you make these big decision.
Goodluck!

I will advice u think deeply b4 u continue living in grudges with this guy, from the way u present him,he seem so loving caring and all that, find a way in ur heart to 4give him of infidelity cos it very hard this days to find a man who will accept u wit ur son get on kneels and pray to God for strength to forgive him

slimyem: he cheated on you once,he'll do it again!
Forgive him if you want and can live with what he did and marry him if you think he's the best but think it through and through before you make these big decision.
Goodluck Jonathan!

silly hypothesis.
@op, if you feel you can't trust him again, you better leave.

If a man cant accept you and your child then he is no good! There are a lot of men who would treat your child as there own never fall discouraged...

blakcqueen1: I'm a south african who's been in & out of a relationship wit this Nigerian man for 5yrs. He went to get hiv tested, was happy with the results then decided to settle down that's how we got back together. Our relationship got more serious than before.

Now I recently found out that he slept wit my sister same day I was telling my sister how we were planning to get married & looking up on her seeking sisterly advise. It broke my heart they both said it was a mistake but my sister later confessed she did it intentionally because she felt she was living under my shadow. All this has passed I got back wit him but part of me still hurting,sometimes I feel that I made a huge mistake by taking him back. things got more serious than ever. We engaged & he talks about starting a family. He is kind & loving & very good wit my son he actually takes him as his own he is even plannin on changing his surname once we get married he asked me to leave my job & manages 1 of his businesses of which I did. Yet deep down I feel that I would have listened to my heart more before I made rational decisions, I still feel hurt by what happened, everynight the memories still haunt me down. I'm not yet healed & I don't know how to pull through this.

Please help.

Confused

MyNaijaLove89, please read the bolded. Thanks

find a place in ur heart to forgive him. even if the thoughts of what happened may not easily fade away. with time the happiness and joy that comes from good family living would help do away with the past. There are So many stories behind some successful families, urs' might just be a minor case compare to other. And u are fortunate it didnt result to pregnancy or child birth. There is high moral decadence every where, only few can survive

^^^I was about pointing that out to 9jaLo....










Some pple r just in a hurry to give their advise without reading d 'story' carefully.

Thank you all for your positive reply.