Hmmm, I'm only guilty of No.6 as a Jesus baby lol.

I think OP and the rest of the guys complaining should review the type of girls they're going for. I don't know any female friend of mine that would act like this.

You're actually making so much sense, but I don't expect people with the "Nigerian" mindset to agree with you or even understand in general. People hear about others who faced real hardships, yet still managed to make it but there's always "a reason" why we can't apply that same diligence and hard work and get similar results.

I don't think there is any justification for robbing someone of their possessions, regardless of the situation you're facing. But that's just my own opinion *shrugs*.

Wow guys, I can't believe I made front page with my first thread i'm overwhelmed by the responses. There was a lot of good advice and a lot of pained advice and a lot of advice that may work for others but not for me. Thanks to all that commented, I hope you find your own true partner one day. With that in mind i'd like to clarify some things:
1. I don't look down on less advantaged people, i've dated some and their mindset didn't work for me. (Insecure and low ambition, the ones I dated sha)
2. I mentioned I want someone on my level, not a rich or ready made guy, however someone with potential from a good home would do well too
3. I live in a good estate on the Island (off Chevron drive) and my family are firmly middle class, there is a certain level of spouse they are expecting from me. Did you castigate Zahra Buhari for looking for and marrying a rich guy?
4. I was born abroad(US) and have the relevant papers, I am not looking for a meal ticket or a way out of Nigeria, I can leave any time
5. I earn above 350k a month and even if I lost this job, my level wouldn't change. However, I am determined not to rely on my family's wealth.
6. I assumed people would understand that money/family background is secondary to more important things like character, personality and interests(ain't marrying no Man U supporter) but if this wasn't obvious, that's my bad
7. I am 25, I just like saying mid 20's, i like the way it sounds
8. I'm not in a rush, i'm just curious about my future, ultimately I know I should trust in God more, he has my back.
9. Is it not on this same nairaland that people were saying a person earning less than X Naira shouldn't get married, that applies here too
10. It is also here that men are crying that their women who earn more than them have turned into the ogas of the house, i'd rather avoid issues like this please

Hmm that's all I can think of for now, thanks again guys.

Rukkydelta:
Please don't settle for less. I love independent and hardworking ladies like you
Settle for someone within your financial range or someone above
And I will advise you if you are christian to pray that God should give you a rightful partner
Wishing you all the best sis

Aww thank you

truthsayer009:


Sorry to say, but let me spill this out for you.

If you hang out where lower middle class / struggling guys hang out. Those are who will come your way. Your circle of friends too also matters.

Your location also matters, if you are doing well but staying in a local area on the mainland. Who do you think you would mix with?

Your church / mosque also matters. You cannot be worshiping at House on the Rock or Redeem church in Banana island & be mixing up with Riff Raff's.

If you want to meet rich guys, you need to set yourself up.

How do you think all those Runs girls make the moves?

Lool! This is very true, but it's not 100% fool proof. I live in a nice area and attend a good church, I think I have a look that says i'm not so high maintenance (not really into weaves or makeup) which may work against me. I'm also a bit shy, which doesn't help either.

truthsayer009:


Exactly sis. Exactly.

She's rolling with lower class people and friends / co-workers and expecting a miracle rich husband.

If you Roll with chickens. More chickens would come way.

Looool chickens my chest!!

DeeTus:
LOL! Chill gurl. The right man would come for you. Meanwhile, you have just invited some desperate guys on Nairaland. They gonna bomber you with PMs.

Lol, i'm impatient I know, i'm working on it.

NCANpatroller:


It is. Been limited in nigeria is not any guys fault. Your good job is from ur parent

Actually, sometimes luck comes into play. I was lucky/blessed to get this job, but I also worked hard to make sure I had the necessary skills so that when the oppurtunity came I killed the interview!

emman44:

Sorry for being religious doh I'm not the serious type when it come to religion. But on partner issue, you should ask God for direction.

True sha, some of us like to be too independent?

IamAirforce1:
I pray you find what you're looking for

Aww thanks

NCANpatroller:
Marry your mothers husband!
Im sure is already made
Oponu
Sow and reap!
Gerrahia mehn

Bruv, it's reaaallllyyy not that deep, lol.

Evaberry:
Lol op sorry to ask but how old are you

I'm in my mid 20's.

pocohantas:
You are not a gold-digger or any of those plenty adjectives.

Settle for where you find love, respect and fulfilment.

The probability you would the above in a social status way below yours is low.

As I have come to notice our daily cycle, religious, social and professional association ...plays a huge influence on who we meet.

Hmmm, technically I found the respect with them. Love and fulfilment are so abstract, it's hard to determine how much is really enough. I like this answer though, thanks

Hey guys,

I'm in my mid 20's and i've been working for a few years now, my current salary is very decent and i'm striving to earn more. Obviously at my age, i'm thinking of the long term which obviously includes my career but i'm also looking forward to and marriage and kids. However, the vast majority of guys i've met are either not ready for the long term, or they're still in their 'struggling' phase.

Is it bad that I want someone who is at least on the same level as me, or maybe even slightly below? Am I a 'gold-digger' because i don't really want to 'eat garri' with a guy before he blows? I've dated these guys before but even till now their level hasn't changed much despite all their talk about potential.

I don't mind having to split the bill once in a while or even contribute but i'm a lady that's used to certain tastes. My family isn't Dangote rich but we're doing quite well, and i'd like to continue living that life or at least not drop too far below. What do you guys think? Do I keep looking for these 'almost/made guys'(can anyone tell me where to find them? lol) or do I settle for a struggler.

How do we really know they don't take light in our areas if we go to work/out of the house each day? hmmmm......

Anyways, in my area of Ajah, Lagos we have near constant light. There are times where they don't take light at all for periods of a week or so, sometimes it's a bit worse and they make take it once a day for about a few hours.

I have an inverter though so sometimes it's difficult to know which one we're on unless it's night time. At this point we haven't had to use our gen in a month, which is wreaking havoc on it's battery.

I think the problem here is that Nigerians like to use negative experiences and transform them into sweeping generalisations.

Contract staff work under a particular contract, you work X amount of months for X amount of pay and X benefits.

Being a contract staff isn't necessarily a bad thing and there are various reasons why companies hire contract staff. For example, some want to have insurance against hiring someone off the bat in case they don't perform well. In this case the contract is used as a sort of probationary period. In other cases the role is a temporary one, maybe there's a project you want to execute and you don't have the experience in house. You can contract the outstanding roles to another person or company to undertake the project for you.

Many contract workers actually get paid higher than their peers because what they are being hired for is a specialised role that is hard to fill. These workers also receive benefits that other workers may not and are not bound by office politics because they're not really part of the company.

However, some contract workers are actually company slaves who work hard and get paid badly. If this is your case, you need to do all you can to become indispensable to the company. Learn as much as you can and find a better, more permanent job when you can.

All in all, as a contract worker you have to be smart, and you have to know your rights, otherwise they'll milk you dry.

jrusky:



You have said it. Not that they don't the time but the brain is not their they are semi dullard in term of brain.

Thanks.

I'm absolutely appalled that someone that writes like this has the audacity to say that someone else is a 'dullard in term of brain'.

I guess, on the internet, anyone can say what they want.

Every area in Lagos has it's issues:

1. The pull for certain areas on the island is that they have almost constant light, good water and security. The cons are obviously the flooding and sometimes traffic and distance from the happening areas.
2. Surulere is hailed for it's location and accessibility, but some areas are dangerous and the houses are cramped.
3. Other mainland areas have cheap houses and are secure, but the traffic na die, they have no light and they are far away.
4. While on some areas of the island there's a lack of good water, bad roads and poor transportation to contend with.

All in all, people choose to live where they live, it's not for you to come and gloat over an area's misfortunes, instead we should be brainstorming to improve the situation for everyone. It's interesting to see how people living in their own houses are tagged wannabees because they live in a specific area though

They were not sacked neither were they compelled to leave. MTN allowed those who wanted to leave to do so, however some people may have felt like it was safer to leave now than find out later that they may need to be made redundant.

Hi all,

Are there any naturals here?