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Should I Marry Her? by Gosh234: 10:39pm On Feb 16, 2022 |
I think this is the right section to post this to get the audience needed after posted earlier on Romance Section I am 25 years while she is 30years Currently doing my NYSC, while she deals on laptops and other accessories,which is going fine We have stayed for a year and few months now We are very compatible and of like minds We love each other so much Very decent Responsible And very humble all these while we have known Whatever desired in a woman she has them all On November,this started She came to my house and after eating She asked me out for a marriage and she doesn't mind footing all the bills and everything as regards to that I never expected this because our agreement is to marry when any serious suitor comes She isn't desperate because if she , I know of at least 3 of stable men with good source of income waiting just for her YES I don't have a house of mine neither any source of income She suggested I join her in business as well, as her business is my business as well while searching for a job At same time I so much love her Actually at this point I don't know where to start NB- Never knew she owns the business till months we have dated Same as age gap because she looks damn younger than her age 2 Likes |
Re: Should I Marry Her? by aanuoluwami14(f): 10:44pm On Feb 16, 2022 |
Why asking? 5 Likes |
Re: Should I Marry Her? by Gosh234: 11:02pm On Feb 16, 2022 |
aanuoluwami14:Just fear of unknown 1 Like |
Re: Should I Marry Her? by VeeVeeMyLuv(m): 11:14pm On Feb 16, 2022 |
There is one program I watched recently on DStv In the program there was this guest couple that introduced themselves, the man (husband) say 25 years the young woman (wife) says 26. They have a 4 year old son together. The host who was far older than them was stunned as in shell shocked funny man... How many times have we seen women that were once slim like "l" multiply in size immediately they put to birth? They blow out of proportion into teddy bears. Well it all depends on you sha. It is up to you! 2 Likes 2 Shares |
Re: Should I Marry Her? by thorpido(m): 11:26pm On Feb 16, 2022 |
You're obviously not ready for marriage and she is. You also say you love her but do you love her enough to wed her? 16 Likes |
Re: Should I Marry Her? by uthlaw: 11:32pm On Feb 16, 2022 |
Don't try it,I don talk my own! 12 Likes |
Re: Should I Marry Her? by Gosh234: 12:00am On Feb 17, 2022 |
thorpido:Yes, just considering no source of income yet |
Re: Should I Marry Her? by Gosh234: 12:00am On Feb 17, 2022 |
uthlaw:Your reason please |
Re: Should I Marry Her? by SeaTrade(m): 12:09am On Feb 17, 2022 |
Gosh234:The bolded is a lie sha... Financially stable guys(or rich by your description) waiting for the yes of a 30years old woman that peddles probably used laptops for small profits doesn't seem weird to you?... That girl has her fingers way up the higher echelon of your developing brain. 28 Likes 5 Shares |
Re: Should I Marry Her? by MoneyGoDrop: 12:12am On Feb 17, 2022 |
Marry her at your own peril. 1 Like |
Re: Should I Marry Her? by Kobojunkie: 12:43am On Feb 17, 2022 |
Gosh234:Your relationship is already unique as it is. So it is erroneous to assume that those who have never had your kind of experience would know how to properly advice her in these things. To begin with, no two relationships are the same and no two individuals the same, so you are the best place to know about this lady than anyone here or even in your family, I think. As to whether you are ready for Marriage,only you know that too. You know if you are mature enough for the responsibilities and intricacies of a marriage. So you need to consider the points you point forth and look in wards to decide. If you need more time, you and your gal can decide that too. 12 Likes |
Re: Should I Marry Her? by Nobody: 1:52am On Feb 17, 2022 |
. 6 Likes |
Re: Should I Marry Her? by Richy4(m): 5:28am On Feb 17, 2022 |
SeaTrade: How did you know that she was lying? <<< So a 30 yr old woman in your mindset cannot attract suitors right? <<< Was she a liability to the society?the answer is NO <<< Is she beautiful?...Based on OP statement, She wasn't bad looking... <<< Was she physically challenged... Based on what we read, she wasn't... <<< So why do you think that she was lying? <<<OP on the other hand is financially challenged, because he wasn't working... It could be that this lady was the one helping him financially at the moment... <<<So if she decides to stay away from OP, she has nothing to loose apart from the emotional and time invested in the relationship... <<< U wrote As if OP was the only graduate in the whole country hence her desperation to help him so that they can build up a family together... <<<Meanwhile, I understand that there are graduates working as gatemen, drivers etc whom many ladies were not interested in building futures with despite their qualifications and intelligence ... So what are u really saying here?... 25 Likes |
Re: Should I Marry Her? by CsRockefeller(m): 6:10am On Feb 17, 2022 |
Interesting. 1 Like |
Re: Should I Marry Her? by oldienavie: 6:21am On Feb 17, 2022 |
Gosh234:Tell your parents this and listen to their advise, especially your mom, discuss this with her. I have nothing else to say. 1 Like |
Re: Should I Marry Her? by Acidosis(m): 6:46am On Feb 17, 2022 |
Gosh234: She is actually desperate and you don't know jack about those 3 "stable men". Saying "Yes" to any of those men will only get her laid. She knows this and that's why she's hell bent on funding her marriage with you. It takes nothing to tell a lady about marriage. It takes bravery to approach her family for a traditional marriage list. When it comes to the "former", she's seen it all at her age, she's experienced all the lies and disappointment and can see through the desperation of those 3 men. That's why she's never going to give them her attention. I don't know what to say about getting married to someone 5 years older but do not get married while you're jobless. Her promises and intentions to fund the wedding are from a place of desperate kindness but here is the problem, the moment a man becomes too comfortable with this system, the man will hardly want to do anything. Sooner or later, you'll begin to irritate her. I am sure her thriving business and kindness are reasons you're considering marriage at this point. You don't want to lose a "kind" woman but it's a trap in disguise. Do not push your responsibility to your woman unless the situation at hand is critical (e.g. loss of employment, sickness). Yours is not a critical case. There's nothing critical about an unmarried 25 year old boy. 36 Likes 1 Share |
Re: Should I Marry Her? by Gosh234: 6:55am On Feb 17, 2022 |
Kobojunkie:Thanks so much, you are absolutely right, we are taking more time now to fix a source of income for myself, maybe starting same Business in same city independently 3 Likes |
Re: Should I Marry Her? by Gosh234: 6:58am On Feb 17, 2022 |
InTheCloudySky:Exactly, thanks so much, the only problem having now is the source of income on my own side, working on getting a job or starting same Business in same city independently with our collective help |
Re: Should I Marry Her? by Gosh234: 7:03am On Feb 17, 2022 |
Acidosis:Thanks , getting a business of my own is the plan now, which is working out or getting a job 1 Like |
Re: Should I Marry Her? by Nobody: 7:05am On Feb 17, 2022 |
She's not in your league, unless you're ready to be the submissive one in the relationship. 7 Likes |
Re: Should I Marry Her? by Acidosis(m): 7:07am On Feb 17, 2022 |
Gosh234: Good. But having a business or job is not an automatic ticket to jump into marriage. Also, make sure you carry your family along to avoid wasting her time. 2 Likes |
Re: Should I Marry Her? by oldienavie: 7:31am On Feb 17, 2022 |
Acidosis:You took your time to really educate him, but from what I am seeing, this 25year old guy seems to have the exposure of an 18 year old. A 30 year old lady who is 5 years older than you is saying she will pay her own bride price just for you to marry her and you think it is out of love. OP should go and read about Tonto DIke and CHurchill, it will end in premium tears... 12 Likes |
Re: Should I Marry Her? by SeaTrade(m): 7:38am On Feb 17, 2022 |
oldienavie:He's blinded by the things he gets from her thinking it's free or out of love. The one weh off me na when e say 3 rich guys dey on her neck but she reject them for him that she has to invest in lol. The boy is really naive. 16 Likes 4 Shares |
Re: Should I Marry Her? by faithfull18(f): 7:46am On Feb 17, 2022 |
Oga, get a job or business. Nairaland is the worst place to ask for relationship advice. 2 Likes |
Re: Should I Marry Her? by elantraceey(f): 8:22am On Feb 17, 2022 |
I don't have any issues with the age gap but I won't advice any man to get married to anyone, even Otedola daughters without a very good stable source of income on their own. Work on that first. 3 Likes 1 Share |
Re: Should I Marry Her? by MufasaLion: 8:28am On Feb 17, 2022 |
VeeVeeMyLuv: Your story doesn't add up. 4 Likes |
Re: Should I Marry Her? by Nobody: 8:30am On Feb 17, 2022 |
Are you sure you really love her and are ready for marriage? Or is it because she's got some level of financially security and Independence you're getting all confused and thinking that's the right thing to do for now with her? You better calm down and take your time to figure out what you really want at this time in your life. You're just 25 and for a man your age, you are likely not emotionally and mentally ready just like you're obviously not financially and physically ( no house) ready. Now, let me tell you what you don't know. The lady being 30, is only interested in getting married for her own interests and personal gains which may not include you in the picture. If you know what I mean. She doesn't care whether you're set or not for marriage provided she is ok and to a large extent can sustain herself in the marriage while you're still there trying to get a life/bearing and God help you if anything goes wrong or you experience a slight delay in making something of your life before the kids start coming in ( which might be immediately after marriage), you'll not find it funny and that is when you'll know the true color of the woman you married. Don't allow yourself to be used. She might want to use what she has now to secure what she wants (you) and such intentions may render you useless because you'll be thinking you're covered, meanwhile there's a hole under the beautiful cushion you're being asked to sit on. Which comes with expiry date. Wait a little. Get a bearing and be financially equipped so you can be bold and man enough to manage your home and command some respect, instead of being a puppet husband cos that is what you'll end up as, if you let her "marry you". It is a man that marries a woman. Hope you get my drift. 6 Likes 1 Share |
Re: Should I Marry Her? by VeeVeeMyLuv(m): 8:39am On Feb 17, 2022 |
MufasaLion:Watch restaurant impossible on REALtime on dstv (I can't remember the season & episode now). 1 Like |
Re: Should I Marry Her? by MufasaLion: 8:45am On Feb 17, 2022 |
VeeVeeMyLuv: I'm gonna check but then, how could a couple that ain't up to 30 years have a 24-year-old child? 1 Like |
Re: Should I Marry Her? by VeeVeeMyLuv(m): 8:50am On Feb 17, 2022 |
MufasaLion:Bros check well what I wrote is a 4 year old boy! 1 Like |
Re: Should I Marry Her? by MufasaLion: 8:51am On Feb 17, 2022 |
VeeVeeMyLuv: Oh, my bad. It seems I saw 24. Thanks for the clarification. 1 Like |
Re: Should I Marry Her? by freddie009(m): 9:59am On Feb 17, 2022 |
There are three things to be considered when getting married to a woman. - Age -Level of education -Money You should have at least 2/3 higher than your spouse to get maximum respect. 3 Likes |
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