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Why Do Most Benin Men Love Large Families? - Culture - Nairaland

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Why Do Most Benin Men Love Large Families? by Sweetlemon(f): 4:00pm On Dec 22, 2013
Hello people!

Bini people in the house (I don't know if it is common among all Edo people) why do your men love having large numbers of children? I have noticed that trend for a while now.
The average number of kids in a typical Benin family is 7. And this is irrespective of their financial status o! I know of a struggling couple of barely 4 years in marriage and the wife is heavily pregnant with their third child! My sister who is married to a Bini man is also heavily pregnant with her fourth child, but praise God her hubby can even afford to send 10 kids abroad to study she also has a solid career. I don yab am say she go born pikin tire! cheesy

So please why una like pikins like this? Is it because you hate condoms or it's like a thing of pride to have many kids? You men should pity your wives nau haba! Lol!

Also I noticed that the present generation of Benin men do not marry their fellow Benin girls. I can't remember the last time I saw a Benin husband and wife who are below 45 years. Why?

NB; For people who find it difficult understanding posts at first glance, I AM NOT IN ANY WAY WHATSOEVER MAKING FUN OF OR TRYING TO ATTACK BENIN PEOPLE.
I even feel it is a good thing that you hardly inter-marry because it shows how non-tribalistic you guys are which is a good thing I feel the rest of us Nigerians should emulate.

2 Likes

Re: Why Do Most Benin Men Love Large Families? by danio24ng(m): 5:38pm On Dec 22, 2013
Binis traditionally were into agriculture hence the large family size which serve as cheap labour for their farms. This trend cannot just die like that but the number of children is reducing by generation. For binis marrying other tribes, it depends, we are very receptive and we tend to believe in what we see and if we are ok with our spouse it is usually accepted most times by our family. Most bini men don't like asking their relatives to look for ladies for them, if they are in the north and finds an hausa lady they are ok with, the family will stand by their decision.

4 Likes

Re: Why Do Most Benin Men Love Large Families? by chronique(m): 10:04am On Dec 23, 2013
Sweetlemon,sweetest lemonade. Your sister has done well by marrying one of us. Why not follow suit? Marry me and I promise we won't have too many children. Me,I will pity you. smiley tongue. I really can't say cos I'm not bini per say;I'm esan. But I know from way back,it has always been a thing of pride for our men to father many children(since polygamy was almost like a culture to us). It used to be pretty rare to see an indigene who was born and bred in that state,who didn't have more than one wife. Guess the love for kids and a large family plays a major role in that. Most Edo men believe in their names living long after them. Hence,the large army of kids. You can imagine a family like the popular bello-osagie where most of them are doing well. Today,even those who do not belong to that family,but answer Osagie,have some kinda reputation cos most people tend to think they're from that family. All through my time in school,I was always faced with the challenge of telling people I do not belong to a certain Ighodalo family who happens to be a popular chartered accountant from my state. I'm from a large family also and my dad has as much as 15 kids(amongst which are 4 medical doctors/surgeons,1 accountant,1 lawyer,1 pharmacist,2 economists,2 engineers,2 business mgt graduates,etc) You do the maths and imagine how many grandchildren he would have. Eventually,when all his kids succeed and become popular,he would eventually become one of those popular names from the state.

I just think we like to create dynasties. wink

7 Likes

Re: Why Do Most Benin Men Love Large Families? by dapsoneh: 3:03pm On Dec 23, 2013
K
Re: Why Do Most Benin Men Love Large Families? by ichidodo: 3:04pm On Dec 23, 2013
U know Edo men love to smack that asss....Do the math

2 Likes

Re: Why Do Most Benin Men Love Large Families? by 3Dimension: 3:04pm On Dec 23, 2013
M
Re: Why Do Most Benin Men Love Large Families? by Nobody: 3:05pm On Dec 23, 2013
Wow
Re: Why Do Most Benin Men Love Large Families? by Coldfeet(f): 3:06pm On Dec 23, 2013
Its true! Why? Me can't tell.
Re: Why Do Most Benin Men Love Large Families? by ednut1(m): 3:06pm On Dec 23, 2013
let me say presticibe ie as quickly as possible ur sis husband cannot send 10 children abroad na so e easy
Re: Why Do Most Benin Men Love Large Families? by extremelygolden: 3:08pm On Dec 23, 2013
Increase and multiply, the Bible says. Binis are just obeying God!

1 Like

Re: Why Do Most Benin Men Love Large Families? by Nobody: 3:08pm On Dec 23, 2013
Sweetlemonade oya come let us also make a large family.

I believe I can get you preggers 8 times....

What say you? grin
Re: Why Do Most Benin Men Love Large Families? by Sknda(m): 3:09pm On Dec 23, 2013
A wonderful daily morning devotional for You. www.gospelshower..com
Re: Why Do Most Benin Men Love Large Families? by Nobody: 3:16pm On Dec 23, 2013
.

13 Likes

Re: Why Do Most Benin Men Love Large Families? by emmawiz: 3:19pm On Dec 23, 2013
Because emmmmmm......... Wait a mint I will be back.
Re: Why Do Most Benin Men Love Large Families? by Hadeyeancah(m): 3:19pm On Dec 23, 2013
Where is my Edo girl? Our own number of children will be one squad of a team.I will be the head coach and she will be an assistant head coach
Re: Why Do Most Benin Men Love Large Families? by chelseabmw(m): 3:21pm On Dec 23, 2013
Proud to be From Edo State smiley
Re: Why Do Most Benin Men Love Large Families? by emmawiz: 3:23pm On Dec 23, 2013
I'm bak jus finished sippin g4. I tink is cos of illiteracy........ I don run o b4 sum hooligans 4 here begin.....

1 Like

Re: Why Do Most Benin Men Love Large Families? by Sweetlemon(f): 3:27pm On Dec 23, 2013
ooseven: Bini Man here..

My parents had 5 of us, my uncle had 3, my brothers have 2 each. I am planning to have 2.

Your generalization is misguided, probably by your environment / where you reside. Remember, all Bini men do not live in Benin-City.

Lastly, all tribes and cultures have certain families that are extremely large for whatever reason.So maybe you should consider changing the title to "Why do some men love large families".

Oba gha to kpere...Iseeee

Lol!

Sorry sir.

Maybe I should have said MOST.

As you can see, your fellow Binis here are not disputing that fact.
Re: Why Do Most Benin Men Love Large Families? by Sweetlemon(f): 3:30pm On Dec 23, 2013
danio24ng: Binis traditionally were into agriculture hence the large family size which serve as cheap labour for their farms. This trend cannot just die like that but the number of children is reducing by generation. For binis marrying other tribes, it depends, we are very receptive and we tend to believe in what we see and if we are ok with our spouse it is usually accepted most times by our family. Most bini men don't like asking their relatives to look for ladies for them, if they are in the north and finds an hausa lady they are ok with, the family will stand by their decision.

Ok.

But as per the Benin-Benin marriage, even the Benin men who live in Benin hardly marry their girls. I am yet to see an above 20 years marriage with both Benin spouses living in Edo (I schooled in Edo) and other states.
Re: Why Do Most Benin Men Love Large Families? by Sweetlemon(f): 3:33pm On Dec 23, 2013
chronique: Sweetlemon,sweetest lemonade. Your sister has done well by marrying one of us. Why not follow suit? Marry me and I promise we won't have too many children. Me,I will pity you. smiley tongue. I really can't say cos I'm not bini per say;I'm esan. But I know from way back,it has always been a thing of pride for our men to father many children(since polygamy was almost like a culture to us). It used to be pretty rare to see an indigene who was born and bred in that state,who didn't have more than one wife. Guess the love for kids and a large family plays a major role in that. Most Edo men believe in their names living long after them. Hence,the large army of kids. You can imagine a family like the popular bello-osagie where most of them are doing well. Today,even those who do not belong to that family,but answer Osagie,have some kinda reputation cos most people tend to think they're from that family. All through my time in school,I was always faced with the challenge of telling people I do not belong to a certain Ighodalo family who happens to be a popular chartered accountant from my state. I'm from a large family also and my dad has as much as 15 kids(amongst which are 4 medical doctors/surgeons,1 accountant,1 lawyer,1 pharmacist,2 economists,2 engineers,2 business mgt graduates,etc) You do the maths and imagine how many grandchildren he would have. Eventually,when all his kids succeed and become popular,he would eventually become one of those popular names from the state.

I just think we like to create dynasties. wink

Yea Dynasties they can brag about. lol. I guess they just like this ''clique'' thing. I know they also don't joke with their family bonds.
Re: Why Do Most Benin Men Love Large Families? by buskie13(m): 3:42pm On Dec 23, 2013
Hadeyeancah: Where is my Edo girl? Our own number of children will be one squad of a team.I will be the head coach and she will be an assistant head coach
and you guys must win de world cup or else? grin

1 Like

Re: Why Do Most Benin Men Love Large Families? by bamosagie(m): 3:54pm On Dec 23, 2013
Good observation but the choice of many children is not limited to Benin men alone, all tribes are guilty. Benin men and women are liberal, they do not have a fixation on marrying from the tribe alone, where the heart chooses that is where we go. Mostly we marry for love.
Funny as it may sound the decision on how many children to have is a joint responsibility of both couple, and the woman have greater say actually.

And I think you will marry a Benin man.
Re: Why Do Most Benin Men Love Large Families? by koolpapa(m): 4:05pm On Dec 23, 2013
@ Op Tell us the part of Nigeria you come from before we can say if truly benin men like having large family.

2.How many kids do priscribe for your sister if 4 is too large

3 are u married? If yes where is your husband from and how many kids do you have for him.

Tell NL'S these and let see the basics for your post

1 Like

Re: Why Do Most Benin Men Love Large Families? by passionate88: 4:17pm On Dec 23, 2013
Na so I hear am too
Re: Why Do Most Benin Men Love Large Families? by xp17(m): 4:18pm On Dec 23, 2013
bini men knows how to Spend money on women, so more women would not mind participating in a bini man's benevolence, hence bini men find it uncontrollable to have one lady. (many ladies, many children) . Real bini men don't patronize d use of condom.

1 Like

Re: Why Do Most Benin Men Love Large Families? by another1234(m): 4:19pm On Dec 23, 2013
hmmm,am an edo boy,e stand extraordinary d 4 dignity n o 4 originality.dats .bini men ar vry humble n diligent dats y women always folow dm ,xo d aspet of u sayin most bini men av a large family,common dat was in d last decade wen dy wantd more hand to help dm in deir farm wrk,nw dat civilisatn couple wit educatn as taken place,d large family av b reduce drasticaly.proud to b a bini boy. Rep petroleum engine .uniben. 2go id another1234
Re: Why Do Most Benin Men Love Large Families? by Sweetlemon(f): 4:30pm On Dec 23, 2013
bamosagie: Good observation but the choice of many children is not limited to Benin men alone, all tribes are guilty. Benin men and women are liberal, they do not have a fixation on marrying from the tribe alone, where the heart chooses that is where we go. Mostly we marry for love.
Funny as it may sound the decision on how many children to have is a joint responsibility of both couple, and the woman have greater say actually.

And I think you will marry a Benin man.

Naaa. My sister was fine with just two two kids.

I'm not saying that you guys must marry from your place. I am saying that most, in fact ALL the Benin men I know and heard of that are below 45 married from other tribes. This cannot be said of other tribes.

Lol @ marrying a Benin man grin
Re: Why Do Most Benin Men Love Large Families? by tpia5: 4:35pm On Dec 23, 2013
So, binis 'respect' (ie fear) calabar people.

Interesting.
Re: Why Do Most Benin Men Love Large Families? by Nobody: 4:35pm On Dec 23, 2013
I so seconded to this thread,..it's true,.my grand-father an example "ABURIME" has 23wives they successfull in all their endeavour in life,..amongs the children are stephen ikechukwu keshi's amiable wife,..Eagle-line transport company an my exclusive gorgeous mum,.so so many to list,. Another largest family in benin is "OSULA" family, "OBASEKI family.. Iselooooogbe to uuuuuu all a.k.a happy season

Re: Why Do Most Benin Men Love Large Families? by Sweetlemon(f): 4:39pm On Dec 23, 2013
koolpapa: @ Op Tell us the part of Nigeria you come from before we can say if truly benin men like having large family.

2.How many kids do priscribe for your sister if 4 is too large

3 are u married? If yes where is your husband from and how many kids do you have for him.

Tell NL'S these and let see the basics for your post

No need to sound so defensive. This thread is not to mock you guys but to just satisfy my curiosity. I have three Benin couples as neighbors, one has 7 kids (married for 9 years) , the other one has 5 (married for 7 years), the last and newest couple of not up to 4 years in marriage have 3 kids. Only one of the couples are financially ok.

In my sister's case, the man does not look like he's ok with 4 kids o (and she wanted only two at the beginning) ! She is sha lucky that her hubby is spacing the kids and they are comfortable enough to 15 kids.
Re: Why Do Most Benin Men Love Large Families? by Nobody: 4:41pm On Dec 23, 2013
Sweetlemon:

Naaa. My sister was fine with just two two kids.

I'm not saying that you guys must marry from your place. I am saying that most, in fact ALL the Benin men I know and I know and heard of that are below 45 married from other tribes. This cannot be said of other tribes.

Lol @ marrying a Benin man grin
am still single if don't mind,...we are action maker which ar hope u will be path off,.
Re: Why Do Most Benin Men Love Large Families? by Sweetlemon(f): 4:43pm On Dec 23, 2013
xp17: bini men knows how to Spend money on women, so more women would not mind participating in a bini man's benevolence, hence bini men find it uncontrollable to have one lady. (many ladies, many children) . Real bini men don't patronize d use of condom.

Ehen! I v always known they just don't like condoms! lol!

But even most of the ones with one wife have at least 5 kids. So it's not just because they marry many wives.

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