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Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Family / Why Do Men And Women In Diaspora Come To Naija To Marry (27595 Views)
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Re: Why Do Men And Women In Diaspora Come To Naija To Marry by Nobody: 8:12pm On Dec 09, 2014 |
chrisxxx: It is a lie that all or most Nigerian girls prefer white guys. 11 Likes |
Re: Why Do Men And Women In Diaspora Come To Naija To Marry by ROZZAYY(f): 8:15pm On Dec 09, 2014 |
Yawns. Lemme sleep ova it ill get d answer by tmoro. 2 Likes |
Re: Why Do Men And Women In Diaspora Come To Naija To Marry by Nobody: 8:17pm On Dec 09, 2014 |
They are tired of toys. They are tired is miserable single life. Age is telling on them. They have the cash to spend. |
Re: Why Do Men And Women In Diaspora Come To Naija To Marry by Sharksblow(m): 8:18pm On Dec 09, 2014 |
dem wan marry African woman and not a LADY. for more info, listen to abami eda's LADY 1 Like 1 Share |
Re: Why Do Men And Women In Diaspora Come To Naija To Marry by Sunbellar: 8:19pm On Dec 09, 2014 |
Because home made foods are sweeter than hoteliers! 1 Like |
Re: Why Do Men And Women In Diaspora Come To Naija To Marry by LastProphet: 8:22pm On Dec 09, 2014 |
Its mostlyan ibo thing, they dont integrate well into other cultures so they find it easier to come back home. also an ibo guy can travel with primary school cert so what kind of people do you expect him to mix with over there? He often find it easier to come back to marry his village girlfriend. 5 Likes |
Re: Why Do Men And Women In Diaspora Come To Naija To Marry by joseph1832(m): 8:23pm On Dec 09, 2014 |
ROZZAYY:Hmm I see. |
Re: Why Do Men And Women In Diaspora Come To Naija To Marry by GboyegaD(m): 8:26pm On Dec 09, 2014 |
skyprofm: Perhaps the ones you know. I have a couple of friends who went back to Nigeria to pick up their spouse. Most times, it is because it takes a while for people to get necessary documents to enable them bring someone. |
Re: Why Do Men And Women In Diaspora Come To Naija To Marry by Sunbellar: 8:27pm On Dec 09, 2014 |
chrisxxx:Hmmm! Seems you just hit the nut! 2 Likes |
Re: Why Do Men And Women In Diaspora Come To Naija To Marry by Nobody: 8:34pm On Dec 09, 2014 |
3cycle:hw old ar u? 1 Like |
Re: Why Do Men And Women In Diaspora Come To Naija To Marry by Nobody: 8:36pm On Dec 09, 2014 |
stardragon:What has age got to do with my statement? 2 Likes |
Re: Why Do Men And Women In Diaspora Come To Naija To Marry by aspirebig: 8:39pm On Dec 09, 2014 |
It is personal. Most people that come back to marry here either come back to marry their former bf,gf or the person grew up here. I haven't seen many people that were born for instance say in the US or UK and leave there to come and marry here. They either marry fellow Nigerians there or marry oyibo...Gaas kiani... In abroad too, the divorce rate is so high with very little respect for marriage.. Their values,cultures,food,belief and ours aren't the same. Most babes abroad can argue,they call it been civilised,no repsect for their spouse,they call police for their spouse anytime,sue the guy,divorce and share his properties and money,they cannot cook and do not want to learn,no thanks to their burger and fast food joints,some are way out of shape too. Also there are many crazy people in abroad,a white woman can take a gun and kill the man anytime over there because of a little misunderstanding. Another reason is because some want the children to know our culture to an extent,know their root,back to their base here in naija,learn to cook our food,speak our language and they also fear that in future,should they change their mind to return to Naija ,the Oyibo woman may disagree to return with them,or even disappear (ja lo) with the kids leaving the man maybe then in his late 60s or earlier 70s to be all alone without any kids. I have seen a man such happened to live,the man was lucky he was like 60yrs then,he married a young ,Nigerain babe that later gave birth to 3children for him. So he started all over again,we only heard that the ist wife is a white and that she disappeared with the man's 5 grown up children till date,we haven't seen those children. Many Naija kids don lost in different countries of the world unto say their parents refuse to return home after their stay abroad. They can't even come back because they don't know their families back here. So it is personal,learn from other people's experience oooo. 5 Likes |
Re: Why Do Men And Women In Diaspora Come To Naija To Marry by Amadaz(m): 8:40pm On Dec 09, 2014 |
lexdino:u never graduate for this your school ni? How many extra years wey u go get sef |
Re: Why Do Men And Women In Diaspora Come To Naija To Marry by plaetton: 8:42pm On Dec 09, 2014 |
Every is pretending like they don't know the simple reasons. It is just a matter a simple arithmetics. While abroad, in any country or any city, you are limited to (a) the number of blacks , then the number of Africans, then the number Nigerians, then the number of your preferred tribe. (B) Then amongst those few , you are limited by the number of the opposites that are single, unattached and within the marriageable age. (c) Still among this smaller group, you are limited by the number of those who are attractive and or educated. (d) and within this even smaller group, you are again limited by the fewer with good attitudes, humility and general compatibility. So, as one can see, a person living abroad faces a diminishing pool of available and suitable partners for the longterm commitment and marriage. Whereas, back in home in Nija, a population 160 million people gives everyone an inexhaustible pool of eligible, attractive , educated and eager males and females to choose from. It is simply a numbers game, where in Nigeria, you have a far far greater chances of choosing partner to suit your preferrences than abroad. 15 Likes |
Re: Why Do Men And Women In Diaspora Come To Naija To Marry by Goldenboy007(m): 8:47pm On Dec 09, 2014 |
My 2 cents - For a man; marrying a Nigerian lady in US is like marrying another husband! There are different categories of ladies here - those that have papers and think they are mini-gods to be worshiped and those without papers who are ready to die with any guy with papers! For those mini-gods, don't go near them except you are one desperate gigolo who needs papers!! Then you must be ready to serve like a slave or they will throw you and your nylon bags out in the middle of the night! Most of these girls end up single mothers or some as unmarried senior girls @40. The other type of girls - The visitors/student that wants green card - they avoid men with similar stay status like leprosy but 5 of them can be chasing one guy that has legal papers! The problem is that this guy also knows these girls are desperados so he maximizes his utility but won't pick any of them as wife! Men run from desperados! If you are lucky you will meet a cool headed lady, hardworking and home maker, no western gender craze, but they are very rare! Now the African American woman..another story ..to be continued! 8 Likes |
Re: Why Do Men And Women In Diaspora Come To Naija To Marry by sowhatifiamibo(m): 8:47pm On Dec 09, 2014 |
rattlesnake:Anything wrong with our men and women seeking spouses at home? I don't think it's an issue but one has to be cautious and vigilant when seeking a spouse at home. Most folks at home who are approached for marriage by foreign based partners try to use that as an easy ticket out of naija or for some other hidden agenda. It also depends on the person's character or personality. |
Re: Why Do Men And Women In Diaspora Come To Naija To Marry by 50calibre(m): 8:47pm On Dec 09, 2014 |
Mondisweets: But you weren't talking like this when I came to marry you from your local San people You were offered to me for free, have you forgotten? 2 Likes |
Re: Why Do Men And Women In Diaspora Come To Naija To Marry by curiousmind11: 8:48pm On Dec 09, 2014 |
chrisxxx: This is the bitter truth. This behavior applies to US and Canada too. |
Re: Why Do Men And Women In Diaspora Come To Naija To Marry by bigiyaro(m): 8:50pm On Dec 09, 2014 |
3cycle:in their 20s n 30s, they are still hustling n f. U. Kin oyibo ashawo. 2 Likes |
Re: Why Do Men And Women In Diaspora Come To Naija To Marry by EbolaParasite: 8:53pm On Dec 09, 2014 |
rattlesnake: Simple statistics. We know most Nigerians would like to marry Nigerians to avoid cultural issues right? Now, how many Nigerian girls/guys live in Nigeria? How many live abroad? Do you expect someone to settle for any girl/guy abroad simply because she is Nigerian? If you live in a city that has only 10 nigerians nko? From a guys perspective, the BEAUTIFUL naija babes are all in naija. The few of them that travelled out have been taken. What do you expect single guys to do? Marry someone they are not attracted to because they are Nigerian or go back home where you have 30 million beautiful black, omalicha, omoge, arewa, wey plenty well well? 5 Likes |
Re: Why Do Men And Women In Diaspora Come To Naija To Marry by Nobody: 8:55pm On Dec 09, 2014 |
3cycle:It has...as if u have finished all that is facing you or important...now want problems. |
Re: Why Do Men And Women In Diaspora Come To Naija To Marry by Nobody: 8:55pm On Dec 09, 2014 |
Hello....Everyone in the comments is talking about diasporan men. What about us? I'll tell you why, for myself: because in our culture, the woman gets taken into the husband's family. My family doesn't want to lose me to some strange culture and never see me again. I'd have less reason to visit home if my husband was not Nigerian. So to answer your question: culture and family. My grandmother reminds me not to marry an American about once every three months since I finished college. And guilt-trips me about wanting to see her great grandchildren before she dies. My mother learned how to guilt people from my grandmother... -_- But I digress. That being said, it's easier for a Nigerian man to marry a non-Nigerian woman because their culture is the one that will dominate. And that is pretty much universal. My cousin just married a foreigner, and she's there struggling to learn our language. Their children will speak it. They live in my uncle's house, in our ancestral state, surrounded by our tribesmen. She gon learn. I'm half-heartedly teaching myself Igbo and my bf's local dialect. Dunno where we'll live yet... it's too early for that. Anyway, you get my point. Now, while it's easier for diasporan men to marry foreigners, they prefer Nigerian wives--if they grew up in Nigeria. If they grew up in Nigeria, they grew up watching women be servile and submissive, and cooking and cleaning. So that's what they grew up thinking married life is like. It's just a foregone conclusion that their future wives will be like that. They can't do that with foreign women. It's usually the born diasporan men who are weirded out by women kneeling and watching them eat. They tend to marry foreign women or other diasporans. I got a little snarky at the end, but whatever. They start complaining when they bring their wives over and they gain some backbone. Years later, the wife is a whole new woman, much to their dismay. My house used to be a "transition stop" for newly arrived Nigerians, so I got to witness this up close and Personal since I was a child. 12 Likes |
Re: Why Do Men And Women In Diaspora Come To Naija To Marry by EbolaParasite: 8:56pm On Dec 09, 2014 |
plaetton: Thank you jare. Na like say we dey think the same thing when i type sha. Didn't see your post before i typed |
Re: Why Do Men And Women In Diaspora Come To Naija To Marry by EbolaParasite: 9:01pm On Dec 09, 2014 |
LastProphet: Look at you displaying your ignorance in public 2 Likes |
Re: Why Do Men And Women In Diaspora Come To Naija To Marry by alex406(m): 9:05pm On Dec 09, 2014 |
Their way of life is different from ours. Marrying a white woman will definitely deny a man a lot of things including communicating with his own family. 1 Like |
Re: Why Do Men And Women In Diaspora Come To Naija To Marry by MOORCHMOORE(m): 9:09pm On Dec 09, 2014 |
When U read post by zubby77 https://www.nairaland.com/1333913/there-back-time-nairaland-best and www.globalruns.com you will find fast answer to your question 1 Like 1 Share |
Re: Why Do Men And Women In Diaspora Come To Naija To Marry by alex406(m): 9:10pm On Dec 09, 2014 |
LastProphet:a fool at your age will never know wisdom. 3 Likes |
Re: Why Do Men And Women In Diaspora Come To Naija To Marry by darkman200: 9:14pm On Dec 09, 2014 |
I think some guys here have lost their girlfriends to Jand and Yankee guys..sorry oh, how come you too no get action ..Boohoohoo! |
Re: Why Do Men And Women In Diaspora Come To Naija To Marry by kilodese(m): 9:23pm On Dec 09, 2014 |
Well, this post is prejudiced. There are many reasons one will decide to return to his people to pick a partner. First, i think most of these guys want a long term relationship (as pointed earlier) the rate of divorce is minimal among fellow Nigerian couples because we believe in family. Of course, you do not have to return to Nigeria to get a Nigerian partner, but that depends on where (what country/ area) you are based. For me, I would have preferred marrying 'oyinbo' and damn the consequences but then I think that will be selfish especially to the children when the issues of marriage arises. Not as if there are no good ones to marry oh, but issue of cultural differences, on issues such as how to raise the kids, vacation in Nigeria (considering the security issues that the country is facing), religion; as most western world are secular, and lots of other issues that will make one want to return home and save some future headaches. Secondly, you want someone who shares your values and concerns. Someone to share your victories with without fear (atleast you no suppose fear Naija peeps ). Thirdly, I think going to Nigeria to marry is away of enlightening and creating opportunity for fellow Nigerian (trust me, every family is on their own in Naija). There are certain things people who live in Nigeria cannot imagine, like good roads that is free of accidents, constant power supply, good healthcare systems, better governance; where people can hold their government to account and have them take responsibility. Because people do not know what government is, is why one will say a grossly incompetent government is the best because the government of the day is from your tribe, share the same religion as you. You see a govt official resigning, even getting jailed because of unaccounted $100, then you wonder what happen to all the billions missing in naija. 3 Likes |
Re: Why Do Men And Women In Diaspora Come To Naija To Marry by Nobody: 9:30pm On Dec 09, 2014 |
50calibre:im a married woman please stop all of this |
Re: Why Do Men And Women In Diaspora Come To Naija To Marry by donLEXY(m): 9:40pm On Dec 09, 2014 |
give me their Number/phasebook page/twitter handle/FiFiEm Fin et al.... I will help you ask them what you need to know, but they have to be in the US not another country ooo rattlesnake: |
Re: Why Do Men And Women In Diaspora Come To Naija To Marry by sanspiffy(m): 9:41pm On Dec 09, 2014 |
alex406:I do not agree with your opinion. ..some white women also are loyal and submissive to our African parents, they will make sure you call your parents and check up on them. I speak from experience |
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