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Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Family / I Told My Hubby To Stop Using My Money.am I Wrong? (38338 Views)
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Re: I Told My Hubby To Stop Using My Money.am I Wrong? by Nobody: 2:39am On Jul 20, 2015 |
Op, you made a very big mistake when you agreed to run a joint account. If he Spends his money on his projects and relatives, don't you have the right to fund your own project like the masters program you are planning for? He is the one that should provide for the entire household while the wife supports and not the other way round. You have to talk to your husband and let him know that you are not happy with his bad habit and if he doesn't desist, you will open another account. Put on your thinking cap and secure your future and that of your children otherwise, you, your husband and kids will find yourselves living in an uncompleted building after retirement. 1 Like |
Re: I Told My Hubby To Stop Using My Money.am I Wrong? by Kimoni: 2:51am On Jul 20, 2015 |
Toks2008: Pickabeau1, Coogar See my kind of man right here There are still people like him o 1 Like |
Re: I Told My Hubby To Stop Using My Money.am I Wrong? by Okeikpu(m): 2:53am On Jul 20, 2015 |
ivyT:women, una too much |
Re: I Told My Hubby To Stop Using My Money.am I Wrong? by Okeikpu(m): 2:57am On Jul 20, 2015 |
Honey y do u bring our personal matters in public Ds marriage is over
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Re: I Told My Hubby To Stop Using My Money.am I Wrong? by flyforall: 2:58am On Jul 20, 2015 |
Follow your dreams and don't let no man/woman bar you from attaining them be it your hubby/Mami |
Re: I Told My Hubby To Stop Using My Money.am I Wrong? by Nobody: 3:03am On Jul 20, 2015 |
I dont think your husband is reckless in spending money, he simply doesnt want you to do that masters. Same thing with the exam you missed. Inferiority complex i guess. But he sure knows what he is doing. Tell him you are no more interested in the exams or masters again and see if he will still be spending your money like that. If your hubby dont want you to do any more exams in your life and you want to,I guess you are the only one that knows the right thing to do cos you are the one in The marriage. 3 Likes |
Re: I Told My Hubby To Stop Using My Money.am I Wrong? by ledaman: 3:47am On Jul 20, 2015 |
First of all the meaning of a man is morning, afternoon and night! if your husband cant provide am sorry to use this word to qualify your spouse as useless man, instead of him to be the provider he is using useless excuses as being broke ! |
Re: I Told My Hubby To Stop Using My Money.am I Wrong? by noble03(f): 3:51am On Jul 20, 2015 |
You did nothing wrong at all. The thing is,most men tend to take women forgranted when it comes to d issue of money. They don't like seeing that a woman has money,so they'll spend that money to the last kobo. Wise up o my sister,take a firm stand. |
Re: I Told My Hubby To Stop Using My Money.am I Wrong? by PubLlcEnemy(m): 3:52am On Jul 20, 2015 |
sunkoye: I speak my Mind and how I see things. I don't sugar coat it, I say it as it is and I often offend people with it... I will always be me... Hence PublicEnemy. |
Re: I Told My Hubby To Stop Using My Money.am I Wrong? by Nobody: 4:52am On Jul 20, 2015 |
Kimoni: Abi what will you say before? Who doesn't like free money? Him doing all that doesn't make him more or less of a man. As long as there is balance, any jara can be taken as a nicety. But you and your "Whats mine is mine, whats yours is ours" mantra....are actually less of a woman. Because your own is not even balanced. You want a parasitic relationship and not a symbiotic one. The kind of evil that will see your FAMILY (Not your husband. Stop talking like as if you are just a phuking guest in the family) go and collect loan from bank to solve a matter when you have money there and don't really have any plans for it besides it just being "your money". You've now conveniently forgotten all the bride price and wahala he went through (especially if you are igbo). Your kind don't deserve marriage. 3 Likes |
Re: I Told My Hubby To Stop Using My Money.am I Wrong? by 3rdeye1(m): 4:56am On Jul 20, 2015 |
This is one of the best topic I have seen in NL. You are a good woman OP. But my candid advice to you is ... Please secure your marriage before securing certificates. Family is alwas first my dear. I'm happy I will be getting married to a woman like urs too... Who has taught me financial prudence. May God keep ur home. |
Re: I Told My Hubby To Stop Using My Money.am I Wrong? by jpphilips(m): 5:00am On Jul 20, 2015 |
FavorofGod: Do you know that men put up with housewives and their broke families, carter for them forever? All these guys who are looking for working class ladies to be depending on, I dey laugh! ! Your husband uses your money what is the fuss? if he earned higher, won't you be spending his? Didn't you know you earned higher when you married him? Didn't you know that the reason he couldn't make it far in his career was because he never had academic pursuit? how do you expect him to support yours? When will men understand that there is no peace when spending a woman's money? You want to do your masters when your hubby has a WASC and you expect him to support you? are you related to Buhari? just kidding. 2 Likes |
Re: I Told My Hubby To Stop Using My Money.am I Wrong? by adconline(m): 5:05am On Jul 20, 2015 |
It's OK for a woman to spend her husband's money as she pleases but it's bad for a man to spend his wife's money if he's broke?? This is 2015 guys!!! |
Re: I Told My Hubby To Stop Using My Money.am I Wrong? by onunwa21(m): 5:05am On Jul 20, 2015 |
Women nawa 4 una, bt all dis y u ve bn using his own moni. Let me ask u If u hubby no use ur moni Who go use am? |
Re: I Told My Hubby To Stop Using My Money.am I Wrong? by pickabeau1: 5:11am On Jul 20, 2015 |
Kimoni: As long as it works for you...lol |
Re: I Told My Hubby To Stop Using My Money.am I Wrong? by OAUTemitayo: 5:13am On Jul 20, 2015 |
As if ladies are worth it. ivyT: |
Re: I Told My Hubby To Stop Using My Money.am I Wrong? by jaybee3(m): 5:24am On Jul 20, 2015 |
Why are we even debating this since he has proven his financial irresponsibility time and time again with no iota of remorse. You already know it's an issue that affects you and the family so the common sense approach is work out and agree to a family budget where both of you will transfer your monthly contributions into an account that both of you will have access to. Open a new account that only you can access so you can save your remaining share of your salary into it. You can't keep exposing yourself to his lack of financial control. If you keep allow him with putting any checks and balances in place then you will surely suffer as family going forward Please under No circumstances should you start hiding things from him as honesty has to be embedded in your relationship. Part of the honesty is you having the brutally honest conversation on how you going to approach the case going forward. He already knows what you earn and you are allowed to save and spend whatever % share of the salary as you deem fit 1 Like 1 Share |
Re: I Told My Hubby To Stop Using My Money.am I Wrong? by gbenga4my(m): 5:27am On Jul 20, 2015 |
FavorofGod: I love your courage , he is a good man nd u r a good woman, I must confess, adults only dialogue. U guyz nid to sit urself and dialogue then reach an agreement togeda. All I understand here is that you wanna run ur masters now and for him, he wants you to run it only when its convenient for him. If u had reached an agreement nd he lapses, if u deny him access to ur finance , it mite nt augur well with him, but he wud understand at d end of d day, bt as it is nw, I dnt knw wat to say dan for u to still av a gentle talk with him, making him reason along with you |
Re: I Told My Hubby To Stop Using My Money.am I Wrong? by jaybee3(m): 5:28am On Jul 20, 2015 |
enoqueen: Do you understand and accept that marriage is a partnership? Do you realise a relationship based on pretence or deliberate falsehood has no chance? You absolutely do not need to lie about your worth if you are the more financially responsible of the two. You can always say No whenever you aren't comfortable with any financial request |
Re: I Told My Hubby To Stop Using My Money.am I Wrong? by jaybee3(m): 5:39am On Jul 20, 2015 |
kilode100: How would she have been able to find that out before marriage when it's not as if he has always had access to her account Besides, why have you comfortable ignored the fact that it's OUR projects not HIS projects? The husband has obviously gotten comfortable with the idea of using her as a financial buffer hence why it's necessary to approach it with an agreed budget approach where the both parties agree on a month by month basis using needs based assessment to decide on expenditure and % contributions |
Re: I Told My Hubby To Stop Using My Money.am I Wrong? by constantchanges: 5:44am On Jul 20, 2015 |
FavorofGod: Before I contribute, Op, I saw a contradiction in your write up. You wrote that he doesn't have a means of income....meaning he is jobless. You also wrote that he cannot fund the capital projects of baby dedication and travelling with his salary alone. Well, this finance issue is a serious matter that must be well handled. |
Re: I Told My Hubby To Stop Using My Money.am I Wrong? by gentl(m): 5:46am On Jul 20, 2015 |
ivyT: No you did not...you should read your comment through before clicking the submit button..you shouldn't put everything your brain process here for us to read,some of them are are not making sense n stop being bias..*sign* some women ain't just worthy of my comment. 2 Likes |
Re: I Told My Hubby To Stop Using My Money.am I Wrong? by eromspete(m): 5:46am On Jul 20, 2015 |
Nne you've got some incredible amount of tolerance. I applaud you for that. Your husband should understand that this is an investment in your career and future. Abeg what you did is right. Wish you success in your future Masters program |
Re: I Told My Hubby To Stop Using My Money.am I Wrong? by jaybee3(m): 5:50am On Jul 20, 2015 |
Toks2008: That much pride in your own marriage, who are you competing with? So you will deliberately stop growing as a family so you can always be the MAN or how else would you navigate an income/expenditure mismatch 3 Likes 1 Share |
Re: I Told My Hubby To Stop Using My Money.am I Wrong? by ukandi1(m): 6:01am On Jul 20, 2015 |
ivyT:i was tempted to rate u very high until i saw that line. |
Re: I Told My Hubby To Stop Using My Money.am I Wrong? by Fxwarrior: 6:02am On Jul 20, 2015 |
ivyT: How can you now judge men with the actions of this mof0 and perhaps that of your own man. Quit generalizing joor. I too condemn the actions of this man and dissociate from it. He's iinsensitive and childish. How can he play with his wife's future like that? Woman you're not wrong, you don't have to tell him about your finances to avoid causing rift open a separate account and allow him play with this particular acccount as his toy. Talking about big party he can't even fund and home coming in these challennging times? He's failing as a man and should be ashamed of himself. |
Re: I Told My Hubby To Stop Using My Money.am I Wrong? by ukandi1(m): 6:07am On Jul 20, 2015 |
enoqueen: and what is wrong with that? |
Re: I Told My Hubby To Stop Using My Money.am I Wrong? by ceeethru(m): 6:10am On Jul 20, 2015 |
wisdomiskey:I feel you... wisdomiskey:I feel you... 2 Likes |
Re: I Told My Hubby To Stop Using My Money.am I Wrong? by Fxwarrior: 6:10am On Jul 20, 2015 |
enoqueen: Truly that what's marriage is about coperation, team work and a wife being a help mate and selflessness, consideration for the needs of others. I doubt you're married. My grouse with this particular man is insensitivity and selfishness. He should be man enough to carter to the needs of his ffamily not becoming a probblem |
Re: I Told My Hubby To Stop Using My Money.am I Wrong? by Nobody: 6:12am On Jul 20, 2015 |
ivyT: |
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