byvan03:




She can dye her old panties to red, he won't know .

edwife:

How much you get?

bukatyne:


If everyone who killed people in Nigeria are in jail, there would be no room in jail.

bukatyne:


@Bold:

The OP is not a power struggle... byvan painted a scenario perfectly...

The food is in front of the husband and the wife is busy... The husband still expects her to leave what she is doing and serve it

Where is the power struggle?

Why are people twisting it to suit their intentions?

zeeblamj:
Hello to u Madam.
I might not be married long enough (six months) but I've been with him long enough to know that a woman is not a maid.
Why is ur husband disrespecting u this much? It all depends on how u started the relationship. He got used to u being his maid and now he wants u to be his maid for the rest of ur lives.
The problem with us women is that while dating we pretend to be the ultimate by cleaning cooking and washing his butt when needs be. After marriage we then expect him to suddenly grow out of it??
Grab urself back up. U are are woman. His wife! Not his maid. Communication is the best thing here. In my opinion coming back here to ask doesn't help cause people's opinions differ and u might get confused in the end and maybe ruin. Ur marriage.
Let me give u an example. I once was in a long distance relationship because of schooling and working and when we got engaged I had gone to visit him for a few days. It was the worst experience of my life cause he needed a maid. Not a wife. He had no respect for me and expected me to cook him breakfast, lunch, dinner, clean and do the laundry without him helping one bit . I couldn't take that disrespect from a man and I broke off the whole thing.
My dear, talk to ur husband about this when he's in the right mood, explain to him how much u have to do around the house. With ur love and patience he will come to understand and help u do chores when he has the time. Communication is key. I have seven years with thesame man to prove it.
Please ladies, don't start the relationship by being his slave otherwise u will be that forever. Marriage is a 50/50 affair and don't let anyone tell u a man is ur lord. Man of the house? What about the woman of the house?
My husband (then fiancé) came home earlier from work and he used to cook dinner before I was back. Did that make him less of a man? I also do things for him and we make sacrifices for eachother. That's what love is.

Timbuktou:


Nne, ayam loaded. Name ya price.

SonOfEl:


madam, your marriage is still young, so don't sound to 'expert'.

nobody said a woman is a slave or must call her husband lord, the point is s woman must honour her husband deeply, its called reverence (I know you hate to hear this part).

the man too should love his wife deeply(pamper her always, but correct her when you have too, you don't expect her to tell you that, that's why you are a man, the head of the house)

anyway, wish you the best in your new married life.

naijababe:


Hubby: I prefer if you serve my food and dish it as well

Me: Ok

Hubby: Babe, hand me the spanner will you please?

Me: I can't darling, I just had my nails done and don't want to be touching any spanner.

Does that help?


I don't even understand this busy thing sef! Busy doing what exactly? How long does it take to serve food? I recall that my mum after serving my dad's food as described by the OP would sit beside him and watch him eat till he finishes.

zeeblamj:
Hello to u Madam.
I might not be married long enough (six months) but I've been with him long enough to know that a woman is not a maid.
Why is ur husband disrespecting u this much? It all depends on how u started the relationship. He got used to u being his maid and now he wants u to be his maid for the rest of ur lives.
The problem with us women is that while dating we pretend to be the ultimate by cleaning cooking and washing his butt when needs be. After marriage we then expect him to suddenly grow out of it??
Grab urself back up. U are are woman. His wife! Not his maid. Communication is the best thing here. In my opinion coming back here to ask doesn't help cause people's opinions differ and u might get confused in the end and maybe ruin. Ur marriage.
Let me give u an example. I once was in a long distance relationship because of schooling and working and when we got engaged I had gone to visit him for a few days. It was the worst experience of my life cause he needed a maid. Not a wife. He had no respect for me and expected me to cook him breakfast, lunch, dinner, clean and do the laundry without him helping one bit . I couldn't take that disrespect from a man and I broke off the whole thing.
My dear, talk to ur husband about this when he's in the right mood, explain to him how much u have to do around the house. With ur love and patience he will come to understand and help u do chores when he has the time. Communication is key. I have seven years with thesame man to prove it.
Please ladies, don't start the relationship by being his slave otherwise u will be that forever. Marriage is a 50/50 affair and don't let anyone tell u a man is ur lord. Man of the house? What about the woman of the house?
My husband (then fiancé) came home earlier from work and he used to cook dinner before I was back. Did that make him less of a man? I also do things for him and we make sacrifices for eachother. That's what love is.

edwife:


I have always been curious to know,how long does it takes to cook and serve an individual....one o.

According to NL your mum has a slave mentality. watching him eat?

edwife:


I have always been curious to know,how long does it takes to cook and serve an individual....one o.

According to NL your mum has a slave mentality. watching him eat?

zeeblamj:

Watching him or eating together could be a sign of love and support. But being busy and still be expected to come and serve him when u probably haven't eaten urself cause u are sorting the kids out for school or preparing for work is absurd. Some people are not understanding at all.

Ewuro4:




#1 ,2,3,4,5 &7 ALL CHECK!

As for #5, Nah. Afro Canadians will never provide an Octogenarian a soapy hand washing water. You walk up to the sink and DIY.

Good early momo morning from my Crib.

naijababe:


In my books, you have no business visiting a man you are yet to be married to for a few days. Why would he not disrespect you, when you put out yourself as 'oshofree'

zeeblamj:

Watching him or eating together could be a sign of love and support. But being busy and still be expected to come and serve him when u probably haven't eaten urself cause u are sorting the kids out for school or preparing for work is absurd. Some people are not understanding at all.

bukatyne:
In the Bible... Men are to serve their wives etc. we have an example in Jesus when He washed the feet of His disciples

bukatyne:
My answer as a Christian doesn't/ will not contradict my answer as a feminist. They all form a part of the whole bukatyne.

naijababe:


Hubby: I prefer if you serve my food and dish it as well

Me: Ok

Hubby: Babe, hand me the spanner will you please?

Me: I can't darling, I just had my nails done and don't want to be touching any spanner.

Does that help?


I don't even understand this busy thing sef! Busy doing what exactly? How long does it take to serve food? I recall that my mum after serving my dad's food as described by the OP would sit beside him and watch him eat till he finishes.

SonOfEl:


stop fooling yourself, everyone can understand the instance of her hands being full with rigorous chores, not the 'forming' your type does nowadays....

Timbuktou:


Maybe she should hire someone to serve her husband. What do you think?

TV01:


Holá J, hope all's well. How are the girls dem? And Oga. Best to all.

I expect posh restaurant service at home. Chateaubriand, not burger shack !


TV

TV01:

If indeed a husband serves his wife - and children, and community - is he therefore not the head of them?
In washing His disciples feet, was The Lord "mutually submitting to them in love" - as you have described it in the past??
Was The Lord not Head of the Church - as a husband is to be head of the home


Of a necessity, your answer as "christian" must contradict your response as "a feminist" in this case, as they are diametrically opposed and cannot be reconciled without re-interpreting one or both ideologies.

"The whole Bukatyne" - what is that exactly , a new syncretic reigion, merging christinity and feminism, but being neither fish nor fowl? You must be the only adherent - on NL at least. No other adherent of feminism has claimed it aligns with christianity - especially regards marriage dynamics - on this forum. They all choose one or t'other .

Isn't it a lonely struggle? It must give you palpitations having to make so many assertions that simply don't make sense or accord with either doctrine in order to forcibly align the two - somethings gotta give

https://www.nairaland.com/2351801/feminism-joke-nigeriafor-now/6#34377924


TV

SonOfEl:


stop fooling yourself, everyone can understand the instance of her hands being full with rigorous chores, not the 'forming' your type does nowadays....

naijababe:





Busy doing what exactly?

How long does it take to serve food?

I recall that my mum after serving my dad's food as described by the OP would sit beside him and watch him eat till he finishes.

pretydiva:
D man is just being immature imo

edwife:

Yimu!

bukatyne:


Suddenly everyone can understand?

alfa0:


On the contrary,i think they are lacking understanding.
for instance,my wife does all these with happiness,there are days she will prepare the meals,place it on the table,calls me that food is ready,when am on the table ,she will dish it,but to my greatest surprise,she will tell me to eat while she wakes our second son to feed him that she guess he might be hungry.i will say No,because i prefer eating with her.most times she will refuse,in such case,i will say ok,the food can wait while i feed the first son who is 2yrs plus now.she will smile,we feed the boys together ,then get back to our food.
but most times when am seriously hungry,i will be feeding the boy and same time eating my food.i encourage her to do same ,she will try and end up leaving the food to feed the baby.
i believe people make much fuss about things that happen in homes when they don't know how to play their wings very well.maturity comes from both sides,the woman can dish the food without seeing it as extra work.she is complaining because she sees it as extra work and that is why the man is miss behaving too.

naijababe:


In my books, you have no business visiting a man you are yet to be married to for a few days. Why would he not disrespect you, when you put out yourself as 'oshofree'

TV01:



I expect posh restaurant service at home. Chateaubriand, not burger shack !


TV