My Inlaws Giving Conditions. - Family (2)

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My Inlaws Giving Conditions. - Family (2) - Nairaland

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Re: My Inlaws Giving Conditions. by Nobody: 6:02pm On Sep 24, 2016

Of the three conditions which one do you object to?

1. I believe the bride's church is always the traditionally accepted place to get married.

2. Don't you want your wife to further her studies? The location and who pays may be sorted out ( that's the only ish I see there)

3. Are you planning on laying your hands on your wife?

I don't see any issue here except for the school thing which can be sorted and worked out.

I can understand the father's fears, though he was a bit too "forward".

1 Like

Re: My Inlaws Giving Conditions. by Richy4(m): 8:20pm On Sep 24, 2016

It was not the man that was talking, i strongly believe it was the wife that instigated that.....since she cannot speak boldly when everyone was present so she used the husband as a mouthpiece... and i believe the man said that so that there will be peace in his own home...if he did not say it the woman might nag and nag.. u know how all this "christian mothers" do make things difficult..

I know u were angry hence u made that statement that she should look for someone else..

Look bro, u have started bathing already, u should not feel cold at this juncture....
Do what u feel is right ok.. and do not break the girl's heart... U never can tell the battle she has been fighting with her parent and loved ones over you... Because a lot of them will prefer she marry the abroad husband.. who wouldn't..constant power supply in USA or was it UK, clean fresh air, abroad parental medical checkup, not to talk of "mouth making" in public like my daughter married a man abroad.. etc etc... yet she chose u for love and happiness... So just calm down and do your thing... your paramount objective should be your girl's happiness... not what her parent said.. goodluck bro...

1 Like

Re: My Inlaws Giving Conditions. by TheArchangel(f): 8:28pm On Sep 24, 2016

joseph1832:
Alright, how much?

A job at CBN clinics or its equivalent will do. Thanks tongue

Re: My Inlaws Giving Conditions. by freecocoa(f): 8:34pm On Sep 24, 2016

Call me crazy but I'm thinking the babe shouldn't even marry you if something like this is reason enough to tell her to find someone else, where is the love then? Mschew.

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Re: My Inlaws Giving Conditions. by joseph1832(m): 8:49pm On Sep 24, 2016

TheArchangel:

A job at CBN clinics or its equivalent will do. Thanks

www.npower.gov.ng will solve your problem. tongue

Re: My Inlaws Giving Conditions. by TheArchangel(f): 8:54pm On Sep 24, 2016

joseph1832:
www.npower.gov.ng will solve your problem.

Nay. Ain't seeing any CBN or NNPC or any of them juicy companies there. So do me a favour and fix me somewhere damn it

Re: My Inlaws Giving Conditions. by EngrWanted: 9:29pm On Sep 24, 2016

freecocoa:
Call me crazy but I'm thinking the babe shouldn't even marry you if something like this is reason enough to tell her to find someone else, where is the love then? Mschew.

It came to a point it was obvious her mother was the one instigating the whole melodrama. The woman even threatened to deal with me if I don't leave her daughter. The father call me on the phone one day and told me to forget her daughter and move on since her wife has started threatening. He sympathize with me and told me in confidence his wife is the problem.

The girl still want me, the father said he's not the one that'll get married to his daughter and that whoever she brought home he'll give his blessing but the mom had been the manipulator.

What do you think?

Re: My Inlaws Giving Conditions. by Nyceguy92: 10:00pm On Sep 24, 2016

Abegi, when did it become the responsibility of the father, even the mother, in-law to dictate in which Church their daughter weds?
Bros, unless you want to convert and remain in that Church, you may accept it...

Weddings mainly have always taken place in the groom's church and the lady anticipates it.
Harmless as it it seems, it is disrespectful for the groom to be handed such an order.
Better take a firm stand now than wed in that Church and pull out after, causing another kataka.

In order to dismiss it quickly, condition #3(do not lay hands on her) is not an issue, period.

Further studies is a good thing ad you won't be the only person whose spouse left behind for further education.
However, the decision should entirely rest with you and your wife, taking into consideration the following factors:

*length/duration of studies
*Opportunities for visits home - exists at least once a year
*Plans for starting a family - can be put on hold for 2-3 years or more.

It is presumed that trust/mistrust is not an issue and that both parties will "respect."

It will be interesting if the OP would tell us what is the opinion of his woman on which Church to wed in and traveling out for studies.

Re: My Inlaws Giving Conditions. by freecocoa(f): 10:07pm On Sep 24, 2016

EngrWanted:

It came to a point it was obvious her mother was the one instigating the whole melodrama. The woman even threatened to deal with me if I don't leave her daughter. The father call me on the phone one day and told me to forget her daughter and move on since her wife has started threatening. He sympathize with me and told me in confidence his wife is the problem.

The girl still want me, the father said he's not the one that'll get married to his daughter and that whoever she brought home he'll give his blessing but the mom had been the manipulator.

What do you think?

Well, your woman wanting you still, is a sign that she at least doesn't do everything her mum says.

I think you should have her sit and you both talk it out, you know, like tell her the marriage is between you two directly, therefore she has to find a way to keep her mum in check, if your girl can face her mum and tell her point blank to stop the madness, I think you both can be happy.

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Re: My Inlaws Giving Conditions. by joseph1832(m): 10:09pm On Sep 24, 2016

TheArchangel:
Nay. Ain't seeing any CBN or NNPC or any of them juicy companies there. So do me a favour and fix me somewhere damn it

Oh i'd have loved to fix you with a well labelled juicy mouth watering dick, but you won't survive the experience, so please, look for someone else to fix you somewhere, damnit!. tongue

Re: My Inlaws Giving Conditions. by joseph1832(m): 10:14pm On Sep 24, 2016

EngrWanted:

It came to a point it was obvious her mother was the one instigating the whole melodrama. The woman even threatened to deal with me if I don't leave her daughter. The father call me on the phone one day and told me to forget her daughter and move on since her wife has started threatening. He sympathize with me and told me in confidence his wife is the problem.

The girl still want me, the father said he's not the one that'll get married to his daughter and that whoever she brought home he'll give his blessing but the mom had been the manipulator.

What do you think?

So I wasn't wrong for calling the man a He-Goat and also a first class wimp!

Imagine the douche of a man isn't even ashamed saying his wife is calling the shots!

Dude, it'll do you well to be rid of her and her family of leeches!. Let her be, there are lots of women out there who would be worth your time.

Lick you losses and move on.

1 Like

Re: My Inlaws Giving Conditions. by TheArchangel(f): 11:05pm On Sep 24, 2016

joseph1832:
Oh i'd have loved to fix you with a well labelled juicy mouth watering dick, but you won't survive the experience, so please, look for someone else to fix you somewhere, damnit!.

I am too refine for this type of talk.
So long.

2 Likes

Re: My Inlaws Giving Conditions. by I888(m): 1:51am On Sep 25, 2016

freecocoa:
Call me crazy but I'm thinking the babe shouldn't even marry you if something like this is reason enough to tell her to find someone else, where is the love then? Mschew.

Re: My Inlaws Giving Conditions. by joseph1832(m): 7:02am On Sep 25, 2016

TheArchangel:
I am too refine for this type of talk.
So long.

Like you're too refined when you were disvirgined, right? tongue

Re: My Inlaws Giving Conditions. by joseph1832(m): 7:26am On Sep 25, 2016

crackhaus:

Fvck is all this?

So you mean no one here was going to call out this beautifully crafted load of cow shiit garnished as an opinion..

There's no issue when a FIL gives conditions to his prospective son-in-law right in the presence of everyone, and some mingers went ahead and liked this?

Nonsense!!

If this was a woman here stating how her prospective mother-in-law was giving her conditions of what to do and what not to do, you would certainly have gone full re.tard as usual.

Aye my good man. I find that load of horsecrap pretty shallow. I gave her a piece of my mind but she hasn't responded.

I find many females here are slaves to their emotions and they're very sentimental when another female is involved.

Imagine the nonsense the would be father in law spewed, the guy should allow her 'uncle' sponsor his daughter to school abroad. I mean, what a loser!.

It will do the OP much good to leave the girl alone, if he decides to go ahead, I'm afraid he is heading for disaster.

3 Likes

Re: My Inlaws Giving Conditions. by TheArchangel(f): 7:56am On Sep 25, 2016

joseph1832:
Like you're too refined when you were disvirgined, right?

OK, I am out

Re: My Inlaws Giving Conditions. by joseph1832(m): 8:42am On Sep 25, 2016

TheArchangel:
OK, I am out

Em, you didn't tell me when you came in, why tell me when you're leaving? Or you want me in, so I wouldn't leave? tongue

1 Like

Re: My Inlaws Giving Conditions. by Nobody: 10:02am On Sep 25, 2016

I grew up in a catholic home and presently not attending the catholic church but I am going back to catholic church to get married... My explanation for this is that I knew from the onset that there is no negotiation on this and "honor your father and mother". After the wedding I am going to Winners for my thanksgiving.
You don't intend beating the wife do you?

The American dream....
This should be the only one to bother you. Ask yourself some sincere questions cos this is more of her fight than yours
1. How strong is your lady
2. Can she stand up to her parents.
3. Has she been taking decisions of her own

IMO, if she choose to go to America then I suspect that is the end of the relationship. They wont allow you get married now. Then when she goes they will make her get to meet their America desire..

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Re: My Inlaws Giving Conditions. by joseph1832(m): 10:09am On Sep 25, 2016

favoured234:
I grew up in a catholic home and presently not attending the catholic church but I am going back to catholic church to get married... My explanation for this is that I knew from the onset that there is no negotiation on this and "honor your father and mother". After the wedding I am going to Winners for my thanksgiving.
You don't intend beating the wife do you?

The American dream....
This should be the only one to bother you. Ask yourself some sincere questions cos this is more of her fight than yours
1. How strong is your lady
2. Can she stand up to her parents.
3. Has she been taking decisions of her own

IMO, if she choose to go to America then I suspect that is the end of the relationship. They wont allow you get married now. Then when she goes they will make her get to meet their America desire..

Exactly my thoughts. They've clearly showed him he's not wanted. To think knowing they never wanted him to marry their daughter then allowing him to pay her tuition fees is obvious deceit and it's very shameful.

2 Likes

Re: My Inlaws Giving Conditions. by cococandy(f): 2:33pm On Sep 25, 2016

Hmm

EngrWanted:

It came to a point it was obvious her mother was the one instigating the whole melodrama. The woman even threatened to deal with me if I don't leave her daughter. The father call me on the phone one day and told me to forget her daughter and move on since her wife has started threatening. He sympathize with me and told me in confidence his wife is the problem.

The girl still want me, the father said he's not the one that'll get married to his daughter and that whoever she brought home he'll give his blessing but the mom had been the manipulator.

What do you think?

Re: My Inlaws Giving Conditions. by cococandy(f): 2:36pm On Sep 25, 2016

First of all, I don't like meddlesome in-laws.

You and your fiancée should've been the ones to decide how you want to run your family. No input from her family or yours except if they are asked for their opinions. And opinions they remain. Not conditions.

2 Likes

Re: My Inlaws Giving Conditions. by InformedLola(f): 3:05pm On Sep 25, 2016

thorpido:
There's no issue here oga.
You knew she's a catholic from the beginning.Catholics prefer to wed in their churches and you need to go through the marriage requiremens too in the church.You should have been prepared for that.
I don't see any issue with an uncle sponsoring your fiance's education after marriage as long as he's not a sugar daddy.
The issue of not laying your hands on her should not even be a point.

Go ahead as long as you are sure of your fiancee's love and commitment.

He should not even go ahead. A man who takes such trivialities so serious would be a real pain in marriage when real issues come up.

So EngrWanted, do back down now. Save the poor girl a lot of future heart ache.

Re: My Inlaws Giving Conditions. by achieverme(m): 10:35am On Sep 26, 2016

joseph1832:
No Sane man should allow another man foot the bill of his woman.

Knowing that the lady's brother is in the U.s and he's recommending another man who lives in the U.S for her to marry is a no no.

Seven sacrament? Now that sounds very cultish, don't you think so?

At the emboldened, any man or woman who believes his or her partner must sacrifice what he or she can't sacrifice is somebody anybody who knows what he or she is doing shouldn't even consider getting married to.

Boy, you are not a catholic. Stop talking about things you Dont know a thing about. You may be cursing yourself in the process, while yuou think you are making sense.

Re: My Inlaws Giving Conditions. by joseph1832(m): 12:07pm On Sep 26, 2016

achieverme:

Boy, you are not a catholic. Stop talking about things you Dont know a thing about. You may be cursing yourself in the process, while yuou think you are making sense.

Oh please do shut up! dipsomaniacs like you never seem to understand anything that isn't based on your dogmatic catholic doctrine.

3 Likes

Re: My Inlaws Giving Conditions. by Nobody: 1:40pm On Sep 26, 2016

joseph1832:
Oh please do shut up! dipsomaniacs like you never seem to understand anything that isn't based on your dogmatic catholic doctrine.

How I wish one can like a comment 100 times.

2 Likes

Re: My Inlaws Giving Conditions. by Nobody: 1:45pm On Sep 26, 2016

EngrWanted:

It came to a point it was obvious her mother was the one instigating the whole melodrama. The woman even threatened to deal with me if I don't leave her daughter. The father call me on the phone one day and told me to forget her daughter and move on since her wife has started threatening. He sympathize with me and told me in confidence his wife is the problem.

The girl still want me, the father said he's not the one that'll get married to his daughter and that whoever she brought home he'll give his blessing but the mom had been the manipulator.

What do you think?

Forget bout that girl/family and move on with Your life. That family is obviously going to be a hostile one.

Re: My Inlaws Giving Conditions. by Creamish(f): 3:59pm On Sep 26, 2016

When u marry a lady who's close to her parents, U also marry the inlaws. Pray over it. If your mind tells u to stay, stay.. If the doubt persists, pls find someone else.

achieverme:

Boy, you are not a catholic. Stop talking about things you Dont know a thing about. You may be cursing yourself in the process, while yuou think you are making sense.

Don't mind dat nigga. Ignore him. grin

Joseph1832.. keep kwayet! cheesy

1 Like

Re: My Inlaws Giving Conditions. by Creamish(f): 4:01pm On Sep 26, 2016

freecocoa:
Call me crazy but I'm thinking the babe shouldn't even marry you if something like this is reason enough to tell her to find someone else, where is the love then? Mschew.

My thoughts initially till I read the bit about her meddlesome mother..

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Re: My Inlaws Giving Conditions. by joseph1832(m): 4:14pm On Sep 26, 2016

Creamish:
When u marry a lady who's close to her parents, U also marry the inlaws. Pray over it. If your mind tells u to stay, stay.. If the doubt persists, pls find someone else.

Well Same thing applies to a woman who marries a man who is close to his parents, don't you think so? grin

Don't mind dat nigga. Ignore him.

Jo seph1832.. keep kwayet!

LOL. Catholicism have never held sway for me. That's why I damn well make sure I don't get myself entwined with people who profess something they themselves can't follow or adhere to. wink

2 Likes

Re: My Inlaws Giving Conditions. by Creamish(f): 4:23pm On Sep 26, 2016

joseph1832:
Well Same thing applies to a woman who marries a man who is close to his parents, don't you think so?

Yup. It is not gender discriminatory.

joseph1832:

LOL. Catholicism have never held sway for me. That's why I damn well make sure I don't get myself entwined with people who profess something they themselves can't follow or adhere to.

Na u sabi. Just keep ur opinion about the catholic church to urself doh.. wink

Re: My Inlaws Giving Conditions. by joseph1832(m): 4:28pm On Sep 26, 2016

Creamish:

Yup. It is not gender discriminatory.

Na u sabi. Just keep ur opinion about the catholic church to urself doh..

I'm afraid that is something I can't do. The internet thrive on opinions to survive, i'm just giving my own share of it. grin

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