carinmom:

Haba, i thought as much, you know we are very jealous o.

Project writing is not an easy task wallahi, just as i am here struggling with my thesis, may Allah guide and make it easier for us, ameen

lexiconkabir:


you being jealous is understandable, the Prophet's wives were also jealous, such that a very funny incidence happened, I dont remember it in details which is why i won't say it, before the police department of NL islam section ask for my reference.

yes project is not easy especially when you are grouped with bunch of dependent people.

lexiconkabir:


you being jealous is understandable, the Prophet's wives were also jealous, such that a very funny incidence happened, I dont remember it in details which is why i won't say it, before the police department of NL islam section ask for my reference.

yes project is not easy especially when you are grouped with bunch of dependent people.

carinmom:


I think i can remember that hadith about the prophet SAW wives when they formed two teams, one led by Nana Aisha RA and the other team led by Umm Salama RA, the two teams were so jealous of each other. Don't ask me the reference because i too can't remember it in details.

LOL@ the last paragraph, which is why i hate group project, sometimes as a project supervisor one only gets to be seeing the group leader who is the only one doing the research while the dependent and lazy ones only show face at the end of the whole thing.

I wish you Allah's guidance in your research.

Contact17:
I know this is late but wow. Reading the comments and I am just mind-blown. Learnt a few things though.

lexiconkabir:


You just went through the thread? Thought you were following it the other day....


What got you "mind-blown"?

Contact17:


I went through it but I did not really go through it in detail. I read word for now, I'm like like wow

I am just just mind-blown because subhanallah I guess men really see things differently. Whenever I look at polygamy, I look at it from a woman's prospective. If my husband married another woman, I would think he doesn't love me anymore. I cannot really understand loving more than one person at a time, but if a man is able to love more than one woman. I can't help but think, what's a man's prospective on love? What does it mean to love more than one woman?

lexiconkabir:


Have you noticed a man fall in love quickly compared to a woman? (I'm not talking about lust here).

Contact17:


Honestly,I don't know

Ever wondered why a man that cheats on his wife, still keeps his wife, and even gets afraid to lose her?

Never thought about that either. That's a new way of looking at things. I will probably do some reading on this in sha Allah.

Thanks for your time. Jazakallahu khiran

I sincerely apologize if I put you in an awkward position.

lexiconkabir:


Have you noticed a man fall in love quickly compared to a woman? (I'm not talking about lust here).

Ever wondered why a man that cheats on his wife, still keeps his wife, and even gets afraid to lose her?

tintingz:


Your answer still result to lust, the first thing many men develop as a result of "fall in love quickly" is the sexual chemistry by sight. And note a man can have sexual chemistry to 10 women at the same time before proceeding to second stages of attraction then love, once the 10 women are out of your sight the chemistry is gone.

Now reflect this to your second paragraph.

lexiconkabir:


This sincerely is your opinion and its not necessarily true, a man can genuinely love more than one woman, a man keeps his wife and even gets afraid to lose her when in fact there is another woman he loves because he still loves his wife yet loves this other woman at the same time.

If you've not been in such position before don't be quick to call another man lustful for this.

Bye.

tintingz:
@ bolded, women can also genuinely love more than one man, the thing is women tend to be careful about their emotions.

Do you read where I said "second stages of attraction"? This is when it comes to caring, cooking, respectful, character etc(it depends on what a man likes or want based on culture, religion, education, affection etc).
A man can have sexual chemistry to multiple women when you talk about "fall in love quickly", if these women are out of sight the chemistry is gone but when you talk about the other "fall in love quickly" after the stages of attraction both men and women can fall in love quickly, there are situation where the woman fall in love but took some time for the man to fall in love.

As for a married man who loves his wife and afraid to lose her even though he loves another woman, first reason both women posses some traits he loves but he can never love them equally.
I don't think a man is afraid to lose his wife, I think he's been held down by marriage commitments take this away and see what will happen. He's going to have many women as he wants or better still use polygamy marraige setting.
take example of Tiwa savage & Tbillz, Tuface & Annie.

RABIUSHILE04:




If ur bottomline is saying it is all about LUST, den u r saying rasulullaah is LUSTFUL, waiyadubillaah.

Ur saying that women can also love anoda man, the thing is, naturally women are satisfied with a person when it comes to love, but we men are lacking in this regard(thus Allaah making it halaal for men and not for women).

We myt see some women who love anoda man, true that. But let's ask ourselves, if woman wey don marry dey observe her HIJAB(at home except when she has to go out amongst oda tinz), also wey dey lower her gaze(inside house eg TV, social media, and outside), aw she wan take see anoda man LOVE.

The problem we are facing is, we see a muslimah mingling with men, and u expect things like dis not to occur. To be candid, mixing wif opposite sex should be left for the non-muslims.

As a muslim, we take examples from pious people, especially on marriage, not from these KUFFARs. If u want to argue on a DEENy matter, use kitab wa sunnah everytym.

Screw Romeo and Juliet, Muhammad and Khadijah is GOLD.... Ibrahim and Sarah is amazing... Adam and Hauwa is EPIC...not some drunk, hypocritical in all regard, flimsy,filthy, worthless celebrities, who can't even maintain their own lives, talk less of other people.


We beseech Allaah to guide them to Islaam in shaaa Allaah, it is better for them, by Allaah!

lexiconkabir:


This sincerely is your opinion and its not necessarily true, a man can genuinely love more than one woman, a man keeps his wife and even gets afraid to lose her when in fact there is another woman he loves because he still loves his wife yet loves this other woman at the same time.

If you've not been in such position before don't be quick to call another man lustful for this.

Bye.

RABIUSHILE04:




If ur bottomline is saying it is all about LUST, den u r saying rasulullaah is LUSTFUL, waiyadubillaah.



Ur saying that women can also love anoda man, the thing is, naturally women are satisfied with a person when it comes to love, but we men are lacking in this regard(thus Allaah making it halaal for men and not for women). We myt see some women who love anoda man, true that. But let's ask ourselves, if woman wey don marry dey observe her HIJAB(at home except when she has to go out amongst oda tinz), also wey dey lower her gaze(inside house eg TV, social media, and outside), aw she wan take see anoda man LOVE.


The problem we are facing is, we see a muslimah mingling with men, and u expect things like dis not to occur. To be candid, mixing wif opposite sex should be left for the non-muslims.


As a muslim, we take examples from pious people, especially on marriage, not from these KUFFARs. If u want to argue on a DEENy matter, use kitab wa sunnah everytym.



Screw Romeo and Juliet, Muhammad and Khadijah is GOLD.... Ibrahim and Sarah is amazing... Adam and Hauwa is EPIC...not some drunk, hypocritical in all regard, flimsy,filthy, worthless celebrities, who can't even maintain their own lives, talk less of other people.


We beseech Allaah to guide them to Islaam in shaaa Allaah, it is better for them, by Allaah!

tintingz:

1. If you reason outside the box, why does the Quran and Hadith order women to cover up their body?



2. Yes, women are being careful when it comes to loving someone but that doesn't mean women are not also polygamous. They also fantasize having multiple men as husband.




3. You can also put a man in this shoe.^





4. Mixing with opposite sex is natural for humans.






5. take example from everyone. I'm not one-sided person.





6, Romeo and Juliet might be a fictional literature story but it is among the best top love story in records, Titanic is real life story and its also another true love story. The love stories in scriptures are also among.





7. There are celebrities that live/lived a meaningful life, I mentioned celebrities because they are also humans like us and we can make examples of their mistakes, experience, success.






8. Salaam.

tintingz:
@ bolded, women can also genuinely love more than one man, the thing is women tend to be careful about their emotions.

Do you read where I said "second stages of attraction"? This is when it comes to caring, cooking, respectful, character etc(it depends on what a man likes or want based on culture, religion, education, affection etc).
A man can have sexual chemistry to multiple women when you talk about "fall in love quickly", if these women are out of sight the chemistry is gone but when you talk about the other "fall in love quickly" after the stages of attraction both men and women can fall in love quickly, there are situation where the woman fall in love but took some time for the man to fall in love.

As for a married man who loves his wife and afraid to lose her even though he loves another woman, first reason both women posses some traits he loves but he can never love them equally.

I don't think a man is afraid to lose his wife, I think he's been held down by marriage commitments

take this away and see what will happen. He's going to have many women as he wants or better still use polygamy marraige setting.
take example of Tiwa savage & Tbillz, Tuface & Annie.

RABIUSHILE04:



1. >Also, why does Islaam prescribe for men to lower their gazes too?

2.>Is she an alagbere ni?!

3>To remedy this kind of thing, that is why men should always endeavour to lower their gazes too, that's sunnah.

4.>It is haram in Islaam, for muslim men and women to mix freely, we don't care what is prevalent among other ppl. We are MUSLIMS!

5.>Are u a muslim?!

6. >Again, are you a muslim, who believes in Allaah and the Last day?

7. >A muslim doesn't think like this

8>What is a 'salaam' ? Peace, peace what?!
I'll make it better for you, 'assalam alaykum warahamatullaahi wabarakatuhu'

>We all can imagine the state of the ummaah with replies like this!


>Allaah's help is to be sought!

Ssthorm:
Interestn..i wonder y some males on here r tryn to deny dt not being ok wt a woman isnt cuz more sex is wanted,it is, in most cases wt d exception of very few...n realy dts wat it has bn about,wanting more women 4 sexual reasons n dat has ntn to du wt lovn som1..dere r difrnt reasons pple get marid n dt reason tops d list esp fo polygamous men. N its nt fobiden to do so,matr of fact, wud u say d sahabas dt had concubines had relations wt dem cuz dey were "loving dem?" Of cuz not...it was fo sexual gratification ...
Wat i find disturbn is how dese men hv a troble wt women wen dey say dey wud prefer not to hav a polygamous husband,it dusnt in anyway mean she is of litle faith or lacks knowledge! Its only INNATE to do so,

dere is a hadith wia a man said "he wud behead any man he finds wt hs wife" n d prophet acknowledged n said dt was "gheerah" n evn further said he had more gheerah,"protectv jelosy" So if a man cn threaten to behead anoda cuz sm1 else is wt hs wife den im jst wondern hw u see tns.it is only innate to want to guard ur own,i dnt knw wia d notion of women being naturaly monogamous n men bein naturaly polygamous came to play...hav dese men been women befre?...

tintingz:
It is all because of LUST.

No she's not.

I use to think women fantasizing having multiple partners are promiscuous but it is human nature in the brain. Both men and women are monogamous and polygamous it is only culture, beliefs that made some taboo to some gender.

Women also fantasize having multiple partners, like having Idriis Elba, tray songz, D'banj, Christ brown etc all for themselves the same way men fantasize same it is only culture, beliefs that made it a taboo not to put it into action for some gender.

Why are there cheating wives? Why are some women double dating? In some part of India women marry more than one man. (polyandry)


So you believe a woman should be prison in the house but for men he should only lower his gaze?


It is haraam in Islam to mix with opposite sex(a form of sexual discipline), that's Islam not a general way of human nature. Humans evolve to mix with opposite sexs, the early man mix with opposite sex, even animals.

I'm talking about human nature not religion beliefs.

Yes, a rational one.


Reading literature books like Shakespeare's has nothing to do with my belief.

What does hadith say about seeking knowledge?

but I do.


Salaam is imentioned in the Quran.




Okies.

lexiconkabir:


I don't have any problem with this especially the underlined.

But i will like to add that, sexual gratification is not always the case, truly some men are into it for that but there are some traits a particular man might need, if his first wife possesses all, I don't think a man would look elsewhere, but if his first wife don't, he has the choise of looking elsewhere, if this is found in another woman, he naturally gets attracted to her, its now his choice if he allows that attraction to grow into love, but if he his determined not to have another wife, he will take off the thoughts from his mind.

Lol, don't tell men the reason why they are into something, let men tell you their reason.



When the prophet admitted that the man said so out of gheerah, and that he has more gheerah, what else did he(sallallaahu alayhi wa sallam) said? I have my reason for asking.

Ssthorm:


D prophet said,Allah also has gheerah paternaining hs slaves as He dusnt want us associatn partners wt Him.

N as regards to a woman havn all d qualities a man wants,wen u find a woman dt has "all" my bro dont marry,she is not HUMAN!!.its nt like men get all boxes checked as well,bt dats fo anoda day.

I shudnt gv reasons to y a man does smtn bt shud rada wait til he says so? Hmnnn,Ok,man,iv heard u.

lexiconkabir:


Then that hadeeth shouldn't be used that way, that was done just to keep the laws of Allaah, whom in His Infinite Wisdom mandated that women shouldn't mix freely with non-mahran men and vice versa.



What a man wants from his woman varies, so a particular can be satisfied with the qualities his wife has, without wanting more, like i said, even if the woman dont possess the qualities that fully satisfies a man, some men due to the determimation of not wanting a second wife, just accept thw wife that way.



Since you've been told that it's not all about sex at times, then it will be funny of you if you try to force is down men's throat that its about sex, don't you think?

Ssthorm:

Ok ..i dnt knw d hadith nos. Precisely but wat am sure of is dt d hadeeth was on jealosy..matr of fact it is forbiden to b a man wtout such jelosy in islam,in some narrations such men wudnt b admited to paradise,pls chk it up,i hav a problm wt memorisn numbers,bt i cn b sure of d story well...m nt forcn anytn down on d throats of men pls,m jst stating facts.wen slaves were used as concubines,wasnt it for sex gratification?.. we r humans n r sexual beings male or female

lexiconkabir:


Salaam alaykum

Ssthorm:


Aha..yawwa! On a betr note, wa alaykumussalam warahmatullah wabarakaatuhu

"If the one wife dey do her menses indirectly the hubby dey do menses too, so advantages dey in more dan 1 wife and vice versa, and when HUBBY dey in the mood , thus advantages of been a FOUR STAR GENERAL...(o_o)"

Lol..ds is a comment of a broda on ds thread ova ds issue,so...its a reason

lexiconkabir:


No yawwa o, just see this as a "back and forth" thing.




Its a reason but not all about that, I've been saying that from the start.

Ssthorm:


Lol..in hs quote he said its ONE of dose reasons,lmao....my point is fo hm to point dt out amongst oda reasons..well. u shud knw... bt den agn,m heeding to ur advice of men teln dier reasons 2me.

N reely d isue of women inclinin to a man n men to many cuz its nature is wat makes me ponder...wa salaamu alykum