Donjazzy12:

You are a very very foolish child to want to confront your Dad this way. This is exactly why my friend believes that male children of today are completely useless and worthless. He has a daughter whom he dotes on and that girl loves her dad so much to the extent she can take a bullet for him. You on the other hand your Dad should have sold you to buy recharge card. You are completely worthless as a son! As far as I am concerned , if you are his only child , then he should count himself childless.

Prosper24:


Maybe i should wait until after the said family meeting by next month.

If he skips the meeting this time

Or

Continue with his current behavior then I'm done with him.

Pls, I really really feel & understand you but choose to be happy. You will have your time ,no matter what don't drop any letter , i say again no matter what dont but time will heal things. Some people does that too (like ur dad) they like being good outside and home from will be lacking. Don't ever confront your dad to support yourself attend smes to help u even till u are out of school and till u get job. This is not the time to take sides. You will see more and learn more by being focused and being patients encourage ur mum that things like this don't last its just a face. But u need to stay strong and prepare to get job so as to help your siblings too. In all never look up your parents in d eyes.


The most painful thing is, one will keep managing in school while your dad will be sponsoring other women and their children. It pains..


This man has been doing this for years especially when he was still working.


Now he is only receiving pension, why can't him call himself to order instead he is fornicating and sponsoring other women while at the same time accusing my mom of the same fornication.

We have a lot of financial needs.

My dad had money, he was balling but now no investment, incomplete house. The few furnitures we have in the house my mom bought them all.

He married late and close to 30years older than my mom.


That man is a complete failure. So sorry to say but he has refused to take correction.

Guyman02:
Have you ever thought of asking your father the things he would want your mum to start doing that will make him happy and if he will forgive your mum for any perceived wrong she might have done to him in the past.
Don't take sides with your mum as it will only anger your father.
The source of crisis could be a wrong done by your mum which you may not be aware of and which may have infuriated and humiliated him to the point that he finds succour with other women. For you to put all the blames on your father shows your bias probably because she pays most of your bills as you stated.

Tell your mom to be ready to make some serious sacrifices as may be prescribed by your father for a new beginning, it could be financial issues, emotional, psychological or spiritual or she continues to maintain her stand with no solution.

You said she is a born again Christian but there are several cases whereby some women would obey their pastors and disobey their husbands, would spend more time praying or in church activities than attending to the emotional needs of their husbands and this breeds suspicion even when she is innocent.
You are too young to carry this matter on your head.

Prosper24:
For over 4 years my father have been accusing my mother of fornications which has been a serious issue in our family. (24 years old marriage)

My father have accused my mom of befriending different men in her work place,church and the compound were we live.

Me and my only brother don't stay at home most times due to our school (university).

My little siblings who are in elementary school are the only ones at home and my father keeps filling this kids heads with different kinds of questions about my mom.

Please note that my father does not stay at home often as he likes visiting the village and to be frank i and my friends have caught him several times but i keep it to myself and pray he changes one day just to prevent more chaos in the family.

One day we all went to the village. One of my cousin brothers who base in the village came to visit us. He is known to be a very funny person and to be frank he talks anyhow and jokes a lot.

But my mom was shocked when he told her that my dad had rented a shop for one woman and even bought refrigerator for her. My mom kept mute and never asked my dad.

As the accusations keep increasing my mom who have noticed several suspicious activities of my dad got angry and stated voicing out all she have heard and suspected about my dad including the refrigerator saga.

My dad has beaten my mom in several occasions but at night and even in the day.

Just to cut the story short:

There is a woman who lives close to us, her husband was a very close friend of my dad before he died.

We discovered that my dad eats food from her Unknown to my mom when my mom is not around and they both spend time together in our house and that of the woman.

We also discovered that my dad usually buys food stuff and pay for other items for her.

Now I'm very angry about this because he has carried this irritating life to to our neighbor who he claim the woman's late husband was very close to him and his just showing care for the family as a close friend to his late friend.

Currently now there are unpaid debts in our family, things are extremely difficult yet my dad could buy stuffs for the other woman.

My mom complains about how my dad uses his retirement salary for what she can't explain. He keep saying his clearing debts and all that.

I'm fed up. I want to take serious action. I want to come out to quarrel my dad to the last. After all he chased me out of his house because i had so hard with him due to this numerous accusations he keeps labelling on my mom without any tangible evidence. My mom keeps crying and have decided to call her family members for a joint meeting by next month after my dad have skipped about two different meetings called by my moms people (brothers and sisters cos her dad and mom are late).

Now below is the letter i want to send to my dad. I have made up my mind to take that bold step. Maybe it will change him. Please read below and advice me I'm totally confused i don't want our family to tear apart.

After carring out my research and investigations about the happenings in our family which has over the years been a threat to the unity, progress and stability of our coexistence as one family, i beg to state that:





1) Because you have decided for over 4 years now to frustrate, humiliate and disorganize my mother who happens to be your wife with all kinds of accusations,insults and disgrace for a reason best known to you. And:

2) Because you have derived more pleasure in carrying the bordens of your concubines and that of their children to the detriment of your own family even when you are aware of the sufferings and debts in your family.

I want to make it clear that as a result of this, i have taken it upon myself not minding how it will effect me to suspend anything that has to do with the both of us till futher notice to enable you have more finance and less opposition to continue with those activities of yours that gives you pleasure but i find disgraceful, irritating and odious to me.

Thank you.....

Please Don't mind my English and focus on the write up, na vex i dey use right all this stuff...

edicied:

Oh its ok for the Dad to disown the children but not ok if the child do he xame

Prosper24:
For over 4 years my father have been accusing my mother of fornications which has been a serious issue in our family. (24 years old marriage)






Please Don't mind my English and focus on the write up, na vex i dey use right all this stuff...

Phinalphantasy:


1. Your father will turn a new leaf after all the kids become independent
2. By then all the kids attention would be on the mom, sponsoring her every needs and the dad would truly understand the consequences of all his actions
3. Wait till that time. The patient dog eats the most successful bone
4. Instead of letter, by the you would verbally say your mind to your dad. That convo is gonna be a teary one. Trust me.

Spoken from real life experience

Prosper24:
For over 4 years my father have been accusing my mother of fornications which has been a serious issue in our family. (24 years old marriage)

My father have accused my mom of befriending different men in her work place,church and the compound were we live.

Me and my only brother don't stay at home most times due to our school (university).

My little siblings who are in elementary school are the only ones at home and my father keeps filling this kids heads with different kinds of questions about my mom.

Please note that my father does not stay at home often as he likes visiting the village and to be frank i and my friends have caught him several times but i keep it to myself and pray he changes one day just to prevent more chaos in the family.

One day we all went to the village. One of my cousin brothers who base in the village came to visit us. He is known to be a very funny person and to be frank he talks anyhow and jokes a lot.

But my mom was shocked when he told her that my dad had rented a shop for one woman and even bought refrigerator for her. My mom kept mute and never asked my dad.

As the accusations keep increasing my mom who have noticed several suspicious activities of my dad got angry and stated voicing out all she have heard and suspected about my dad including the refrigerator saga.

My dad has beaten my mom in several occasions but at night and even in the day.

Just to cut the story short:

There is a woman who lives close to us, her husband was a very close friend of my dad before he died.

We discovered that my dad eats food from her Unknown to my mom when my mom is not around and they both spend time together in our house and that of the woman.

We also discovered that my dad usually buys food stuff and pay for other items for her.

Now I'm very angry about this because he has carried this irritating life to to our neighbor who he claim the woman's late husband was very close to him and his just showing care for the family as a close friend to his late friend.

Currently now there are unpaid debts in our family, things are extremely difficult yet my dad could buy stuffs for the other woman.

My mom complains about how my dad uses his retirement salary for what she can't explain. He keep saying his clearing debts and all that.

I'm fed up. I want to take serious action. I want to come out to quarrel my dad to the last. After all he chased me out of his house because i had so hard with him due to this numerous accusations he keeps labelling on my mom without any tangible evidence. My mom keeps crying and have decided to call her family members for a joint meeting by next month after my dad have skipped about two different meetings called by my moms people (brothers and sisters cos her dad and mom are late).

Now below is the letter i want to send to my dad. I have made up my mind to take that bold step. Maybe it will change him. Please read below and advice me I'm totally confused i don't want our family to tear apart.

After carring out my research and investigations about the happenings in our family which has over the years been a threat to the unity, progress and stability of our coexistence as one family, i beg to state that:





1) Because you have decided for over 4 years now to frustrate, humiliate and disorganize my mother who happens to be your wife with all kinds of accusations,insults and disgrace for a reason best known to you. And:

2) Because you have derived more pleasure in carrying the bordens of your concubines and that of their children to the detriment of your own family even when you are aware of the sufferings and debts in your family.

I want to make it clear that as a result of this, i have taken it upon myself not minding how it will effect me to suspend anything that has to do with the both of us till futher notice to enable you have more finance and less opposition to continue with those activities of yours that gives you pleasure but i find disgraceful, irritating and odious to me.

Thank you.....

Please Don't mind my English and focus on the write up, na vex i dey use right all this stuff...

Benita27:
Your dad needs prayers and counselling.

Benita27:
Your dad needs prayers and counselling.

taylor88:
the high rate of konji in this country is mind blowing



the day my dad threatened my mum of getting a second wife i laughed very hard


I seduced the woman and fuvcked her, took her pants to my dad as evidence. no more i go marry


u need to see d joy in my mums face, for 1 month mum was giving me food with 5pieces of meat

this is what worked for me

Benita27:
I've come to the realisation that when there're issues between parents, the "Mother" usually gets sympathy from the kids. There's no smoke without fire. That you haven't caught your mum cheating doesn't mean she may not have cheated on your dad ever. I don't support the domestic violence but this isn't your call but elders. It's disrespectful calling his bluff for him. Let an older person with more wisdom handle this issue, your actions could aggravate things.

The first paragraph of your letter shows you took your mother's side and your dad would see it that way. Why not write him another letter, telling him of the good times you all shared together as a family, and stating why you would love him to change and make things work between him and your mum. Do this then invite the elders to talk to them both.

Most marriages go through this phase over time 'cause "Love" isn't enough. What they need to live with is wisdom.

unitysheart:
But wait o Prosper.


You father is almost thirty years older than your mum and the marriage is 24 years old.

If your mum married at age 20, means she is 44 now.

Is your dad almost 74 years old or there about?

Benita27:
I've come to the realisation that when there're issues between parents, the "Mother" usually gets sympathy from the kids. There's no smoke without fire. That you haven't caught your mum cheating doesn't mean she may not have cheated on your dad ever. I don't support the domestic violence but this isn't your call but elders. It's disrespectful calling his bluff for him. Let an older person with more wisdom handle this issue, your actions could aggravate things.

The first paragraph of your letter shows you took your mother's side and your dad would see it that way. Why not write him another letter, telling him of the good times you all shared together as a family, and stating why you would love him to change and make things work between him and your mum. Do this then invite the elders to talk to them both.

Most marriages go through this phase over time 'cause "Love" isn't enough. What they need to live with is wisdom.

dominique:


Don't continue please, keep your stupid advice to yourself. Did you not read the part where he wrote that its his mum that's in charge of most of his welfare? Yet you have the nerve to say that she's of no use to him. It's your likes that endorse husband maltreatment on their wives.

Prosper24:
For over 4 years my father have been accusing my mother of fornications which has been a serious issue in our family. (24 years old marriage)

Please Don't mind my English and focus on the write up, na vex i dey use right all this stuff...

whitering:

you are looking for reply for asking him to disown his mother. kontinue. I bet the mother is 99.9% innocent. the father is just insecure & heatless.

Benita27:
I've come to the realisation that when there're issues between parents, the "Mother" usually gets sympathy from the kids. There's no smoke without fire. That haven't caught your mum cheating doesn't mean she may not have cheated on your dad ever. I don't support the domestic violence but this isn't your call but elders. It's disrespectful calling his bluff for him. Let an older person with more wisdom handle this issue, your actions could aggravate things.

The first paragraph of your letter shows you took your mother's side and your dad would see it that way. Why not write him another letter, telling him of the good times you all shared together as a family, and stating why you would love him to change and make things work between him and your mum. Do this then invite the elders to talk to them both.

Most marriages go through this phase over time 'cause "Love" isn't enough. What they need to live with is wisdom.

humblenature:
NOW LISTEN. i am going to advise you like one who has seen it all. do not.. i repeat do not ever have issues with ur dad. u can disown your mom but never you ever try shii with ur dad. you belong to ur dad. your mom may be good to u but she is of no use to u and she knows it. i advise u. your dad may not be d best dad but do not joke with him. besides, hoe does his relationship affect u? bros u b man o. no forget say one day u go double date. all men we are all thesame o. leave matter for mattiais. your mom is not innocent. leave them to settke dat thing. your love for ur mom is beclouding ur judgement. reply me first before i continue bros

humblenature:
that is why it is not good to judge with only one side of story. have u hesrd his fsthers side of story? so when someone says something about you i should just believe it and start pronouncing judgement on you without even hearing from u. that is not equity