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Re: Cheating Or Just Innocent Conversation? by Sapiosexuality(m): 1:16pm On Mar 05, 2018 |
Charris2284:Yeah. That's possible. Anyhow you look at it he's still scamming you. Please stop sending him Money. Please. These are the idiots destroying our country. Please stop helping them. Loving a Nigerian in Nigeria while you are in America is often what we call Yahoo Yahoo. Stop sending him money. Such love hardly works from here. They are mostly thieves looking for ways to rip one of their money. Please stop helping these guys. Here is a link for reporting shady people and scammers to our security people here. You can help too but you need something good to hold unto. Please stop helping criminals. These things piss me off. http://www.mortalpoet.com/can-report-crime/ 1 Like |
Re: Cheating Or Just Innocent Conversation? by covbrand(f): 1:38pm On Mar 05, 2018 |
I am a woman too and we always know when something is wrong. this guy is all shades of wrong, he is a scammer and all those ladies know he is only with you for the papers, heck, he might have used the money you sent to take them clubbing and laugh at you. In Nigeria, fraud is a cultural thing, most mothers and fathers are involved. they will string you along till they get the papers while arranging for a new bride in the village for him. I too have been overweight but I lost it,and you can too if it affects you, but believe me there are tones of men who love fleshy ladies. On the aspect of cheating, for most men it's a morale boost for them, it is not your fault. when my husband started cheating on me I was so angry and bitter, but I looked at all his friends and noticed a lot where like him, they even count pu**y like trophies. It can be a blow to you but it's actually a reflection of their shallowness. for the good men who don't cheat, it's not usually because they have Kim kardasian at home, it's a thing of choice. I hope you understand that you need to be whole before you can be in a relationship. goodluck in finding a good man, he might just be next door. 3 Likes |
Re: Cheating Or Just Innocent Conversation? by Nobody: 2:55pm On Mar 05, 2018 |
Charris2284:it's sad oh well take heart and move on. |
Re: Cheating Or Just Innocent Conversation? by Nobody: 3:35pm On Mar 05, 2018 |
Charris2284:
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Re: Cheating Or Just Innocent Conversation? by Nobody: 3:53pm On Mar 05, 2018 |
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Re: Cheating Or Just Innocent Conversation? by Nobody: 3:55pm On Mar 05, 2018 |
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Re: Cheating Or Just Innocent Conversation? by Nobody: 2:47am On Mar 07, 2018 |
He's both a scammed and a player. Move on. 1 Like |
Re: Cheating Or Just Innocent Conversation? by Nobody: 2:56am On Mar 07, 2018 |
Dude is a player. Probably sees u as a maga. 1 Like |
Re: Cheating Or Just Innocent Conversation? by unadeymadkwa: 9:42am On Mar 07, 2018 |
It's obvious the dude is a scammer. Though not very good at it (you should be thankful for that.). Forget about him and move on with your life... From your picture you are beautiful so it wouldn't be hard getting a nice dude... 1 Like |
Re: Cheating Or Just Innocent Conversation? by lenghtinny(m): 12:23pm On Mar 07, 2018 |
Charris2284: I'll be blunt with you ![]() Your situation is called "Come and marry" format in Nigeria. It's very common and the white victims are usually fat, older, lonely and single mothers ( No disrespect). Real profiles are used in this case. No real job is the first red flag you should have noted and then asking for money. He got you trapped in the minute you started sending money to him. There are two likely outcomes from the scenario; * He continues extorting you till he gets tired Or * He takes you to ikoyi registry for marriage but trust me the marriage will be short lived. Don't be fooled by the fact that he's introduced you to his mom... Nowadays, the parents are getting involved in the dubious setup especially if marriage will be taking place. Whatever you thought you guys had isn't real from the guy's perspective. It's just a game to him. Goodluck ![]() 2 Likes |
Re: Cheating Or Just Innocent Conversation? by lenghtinny(m): 12:45pm On Mar 07, 2018 |
Donjazzy12:
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Re: Cheating Or Just Innocent Conversation? by lenghtinny(m): 12:50pm On Mar 07, 2018 |
jacyhelen:Have you dated all the men in the world to arrive at this stupid conclusion ![]() Calling you a fish brain is an insult to the real girls with fish brain cos I'm not sure you have a brain at all ![]() 1 Like
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Re: Cheating Or Just Innocent Conversation? by pweetyoge(f): 1:34pm On Mar 07, 2018 |
in conclusion to everything they have told u on this platform, pls be careful of those who would send u a private message no matter their comments. They also want the same thing. Goodluck to u making genuine friends if u wish to. 1 Like |
Re: Cheating Or Just Innocent Conversation? by Charris2284: 2:39pm On Mar 07, 2018 |
pweetyoge: Lol I'm already 5 steps ahead with that and expected that. I'm not lonely or desperate. I just was being pursued with persistence for the last year and had began to thought after his family was contacting me that maybe it could be real. And the fact he wasn't hiding his identity. I guess I know better now. 1 Like |
Re: Cheating Or Just Innocent Conversation? by Charris2284: 3:35pm On Mar 07, 2018 |
lenghtinny: So at first he was thinking we could do a registry in Nigeria with his immediate family and a bigger wedding in the States, but then he changed his mind to a small wedding instead of just the registry in Nigeria. During our conversations, hes mentioned that we needed to get a car there for "ease of movement" and that he is needing me to pay for much of it (in so many words) which I flat out disagreed and told him he would need to invest in it. With that, he agreed that he would save up for it. He really wants a child. When I met him, I was done having kids. I went through hell with my ex husband and in-laws (he is American) and never wanted to experience that again. But he doesnt have any kids and after a year of this I really....love the idea and wouldnt mind having a child for a husband of mine who didnt have any. Hes told me the he is an entrepreneur and seels cars and electronics. I just never quite understood that. His story hasnt changed at all. But...he went to uni for computer engineering so why couldnt he get a job in that field? Ive asked him this several times and hes told me that jobs there just dont pay enough to survive and that he couldnt find much. Meanwhile his father is a retired banker, mother is a school official and his brother works in a bank too. I just dont understand why he cant or refuses to "work for anyone". When Ive expressed my concerns to him (a few times throughout the last year), hes always quick to suggest that he pays me back for any money Ive sent. And while collectively Ive sent about 2k over time, most of the time it has been maybe $50 USD here or $100 USD there. The big money was really sent in the first few months of being together to help pay for the visa application and it's various requirements plus travel costs to the interview. Since then, Ive rarely sent more than $100 USD at a time. And in the last few months, maybe only $200 altogether. Just seems like so trivial of amounts for it to be worth the hassle for him? Is 34 considered "old"? I am overweight and a divorcee, single mother. But lol I sure hope 34 is not considered too old. LOL |
Re: Cheating Or Just Innocent Conversation? by Charris2284: 3:48pm On Mar 07, 2018 |
Charris2284: At times, he'll also send me pictures throughout the day, and I'll notice how he goes from car lot to car lot. So I never doubted necessarily that he sells things but just never understood it when he went to school for computer engineering. His facebook has TONS of his friends (thousands) and they respond and comment on his posts. So idk. I guess I found security in that he really is a real person. |
Re: Cheating Or Just Innocent Conversation? by SilentBang(m): 6:09pm On Mar 07, 2018 |
jacyhelen:Just wondering, how exactly did you come to this conclusion ![]() 1 Like |
Re: Cheating Or Just Innocent Conversation? by SilentBang(m): 6:21pm On Mar 07, 2018 |
Charris2284 judging by those messages, i really think he is a flirt, and most flirts are cheats... whether joke or not,,, am well convinced he is cheat, The truth is "Dont get it twisted, you are so so not his love" you are just his MAGA, trust your instincts. you really think he is into you ![]() whoever you spoke to isnt his mom, neither were they his siblings... or have you had a video call with the said mom?? even at that all na SCAM. count your losses and move on! i hope you find whatever your are looking for... adios. |
Re: Cheating Or Just Innocent Conversation? by Charris2284: 6:38pm On Mar 07, 2018 |
SilentBang: I agree with the cheating wholeheartedly. I have seen his mom and him, as well as siblings on video and pictures. And lol there is a strong resemblance. You can definitely tell his sister and mother are very closely related to him. Maybe a different relative perhaps, but I'm telling you, he is her twin. We talk all the time. I'm trying to read up on how these types of romance scams work, and I'm getting things like: He wont video you or show true identity He wont introduce you to his family He wont want to get married in Nigeria - or if he agrees, it will only be a registry wedding He wont take interest in getting to know your family He wont spend much time talking to you and will say he has "business affairs" to tend to He will make up big, sometimes outlandish, lies to gain money from you He occasionally has asked if I could send money to help out with things. Most of it went to getting a visa. Then small things like....idk. One time he needed oral surgery and I kmow it was real because he sent me pictures AND video of the stitches in his mouth from wisdom tooth extraction. He ended up getting a loan to pay for it and when he fell behind on the payments, I did send him money to pay it off. He showed me the receipt that he paid it off. Other small things like sometimes I'll ask if he has eaten and he'll tell me what he had eaten and I'll get worried because it isnt much so I'd send maybe $30 USD to help him. Or one time the data plan he had was about to expire and I sent him like $30 or $40 USD. But it's not like I'm sending him all of these huge amounts of money (besides the visa thing - that took up over $1k between the application, travel and other requirements). I'm pretty torn on the scam thing. � |
Re: Cheating Or Just Innocent Conversation? by Ranchhoddas: 7:00pm On Mar 07, 2018 |
Charris2284:Geez... That guy is bad news. Cut your losses and move on. If he really loves you he will not accept money from you for any reason. By the way how do people develop feelings for someone they've never met? Still can't wrap my head around that? |
Re: Cheating Or Just Innocent Conversation? by InfernoNig: 7:01pm On Mar 07, 2018 |
You are messing with a yahoo boy (if you know what this means) and a player |
Re: Cheating Or Just Innocent Conversation? by Charris2284: 7:10pm On Mar 07, 2018 |
Ranchhoddas: I couldn't understand it, either. For a bit, I literally brushed him off and sometimes would flat out tell him to save his time because I wasn't interested. But he persisted. And after a few months, idk. I just...We talked before and after work. Sometimes, many times, all night long on both of our ends. He listens to me and learns me. We know so much about each other. When you show vulnerability, it can really foster emotional investment. He's never, ever raised his voice to me in a threatening manner. Never called me names, always shows me out to people (I'm not going on his word alone. Ive seen him do it). It's very new territory for me to deal with someone long distance. I dont have a habit of it. I honestly think....I felt it was a safer option? When he met me, I didnt want anything to do with a relationship with anyone. I think I saw this as an opportunity to have some kind of...emotional connection without all of the strings attached to a local relationship, if that makes any sense. But as time went on, I really truly started to love him. Funny how human emotions work. |
Re: Cheating Or Just Innocent Conversation? by SilentBang(m): 7:15pm On Mar 07, 2018 |
Charris2284: You sound pretty convinced that he isnt a FRAUD after all... i mean the nexus of this thread is not about that even. for your sake i just hope you are right. Those messages i read up there aint enough to say he is a cheat, but he is quite flirtacious... but really did you honestly expect him to be celibate too...? well best of luck you two. 2 Likes |
Re: Cheating Or Just Innocent Conversation? by Charris2284: 7:16pm On Mar 07, 2018 |
InfernoNig: I know what a Yahoo boy is. But...he doesnt seem to fit all of the criteria of one, from what Ive read over the internet for the last couple of months. What makes so many so certain he is, specifically? Because Ive sent money? Many times, he wont even necessarily ask for it. He may allude to it. But sometimes he needs money and doesnt ask and I dont send and sometimes he has needed it and I do send without him asking. And its never much that I send. Is it really worth the trouble for him? He is almost always available to talk or video chat or what-not. Has shown me ID. His facebook is literally full of family and friends who comment when he posts. Some of them at first even were openly surprised he was with me. So ALL of his facebook friends are thieves and criminals and heartless passersby? Idk. That's pretty hard to swallow. I dont think he is faithful and I have doubts about his attraction to me but...it could be my hangup. Idk. Or it could be that hes using me. |
Re: Cheating Or Just Innocent Conversation? by Charris2284: 7:20pm On Mar 07, 2018 |
SilentBang: Yes, exactly. This thread was mainly about infidelity of a relationship that I presumed to be true and then it kinda went off tangent on is the relationship even rooted in truth. |
Re: Cheating Or Just Innocent Conversation? by BluntTheApostle(m): 7:22pm On Mar 07, 2018 |
Charris2284: He may not be using you but he is DEFINITELY not faithful. 1 Like |
Re: Cheating Or Just Innocent Conversation? by Charris2284: 7:27pm On Mar 07, 2018 |
SilentBang: In the first few months, no I did not at all expect him to be celibate. But then...I started thinking. He would message and call me all the time. All the time. Even when I was at work. When I broke it off with him for about 6 weeks during the summer, his family contacted me to tell me how sad he has been and how he was hospitalized for high blood pressure and pleading with me to at least speak to him. And I felt bad because he was always so kind to me and took great interest in knowing and talking to my siblings and even my father. So we got back together. I broke it off with him strictly because I didnt see how it could be serious and how could he possibly love me. Ive got major trust issues with men to begin with and when he met me I wanted nothing to do with men in general besides ...tbh, using them as much as they use women. And he turned my heart around. Sounds cliche but it happened. |
Re: Cheating Or Just Innocent Conversation? by Charris2284: 7:28pm On Mar 07, 2018 |
BluntTheApostle: Agreed! 1 Like |
Re: Cheating Or Just Innocent Conversation? by Ranchhoddas: 7:31pm On Mar 07, 2018 |
Charris2284:Well I'm no relationship expert but I still think he's a fraud. Go with your gut. You are being used. Sadly. And you are not overweight from what I can see. |
Re: Cheating Or Just Innocent Conversation? by Charris2284: 7:31pm On Mar 07, 2018 |
I sent him a small package once. It contained a card and a cross keychain. If he was such a fraud, why give me an address? i know he picked it up because he's sent pictures of receiving it and once, when I was really down, he sent me a picture of him holding the keychain and told me he always carries it with him. Why do all of that just for $30 USD here or there? I could see maybe the visa thing...but that came and went. He knows he will need to dave up his own money for the next application attempt. |
Re: Cheating Or Just Innocent Conversation? by InfernoNig: 7:32pm On Mar 07, 2018 |
Ok. If you say so. My advice is just move on, focus yourself and your kid, who knows there's someone better out there. Peace Charris2284: |
Re: Cheating Or Just Innocent Conversation? by Charris2284: 7:35pm On Mar 07, 2018 |
InfernoNig: Certainly do appreciate your (and everyone's ) input on the matter. Only time will tell. And it definitely will tell. |
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