rubi96:
That's what you feel. For me I like my freedom the way it is. No time to be cracking head for someone. I am selfish like that.

Continue... Soon you'll be the one disturbing God and Pastors even native doctors up and down asking to know what your crime is that made you to remain single.

Obingene:


May it be ur portion, may love be far from your household, may it be filled with strife and anger.

Mr man I am not responsible for your frustration in life, look at the animal throwing curses when I did not even address him.

Fool

And everything you write to me will return to you and your household, your family your children

Foolish he goat

CHoccolaTE:


Mr man I am not responsible for your frustration in life, look at the animal throwing curses when I did not even address him.

Fool

Lol.

My dear sorry for what you are passing through, I could have asked to hear your husband's side but the truth is that even without hearing his side I can tell he has an ego issue irrespective. You mentioned earlier that your husband has backslidden from God, this is the root cause of the problem because basic true christianity lets you know that in a marriage a man should not always demand an apology for peace to reign whether the wife is right or wrong, secondly even when he gets an apology he should accept it quickly and wholeheartedly and not refer to the issue again. The first solution you have is to pray,pray and pray for your husband that God will touch his heart so that he rekindle that lost relationship with God and love you with the love of God secondly you can call him and tell him how you have been feeling on the way treats you, dont tell him with arrogance pls but as a partner. Try these two things first and I believe it will help.

CHoccolaTE:


Lol

You see, life is not that difficult.

I'm glad I brought laughter and smiles to your face, I should send the bill but, this is my contribution to humanity.

Psoul:


Continue... Soon you'll be the one disturbing God and Pastors even native doctors up and down asking to know what your crime is that made you to remain single.

I won't. If it is not in my destiny to marry, I won't force myself. To each his or her own.

Obingene:


You see, life is not that difficult.

I'm glad I brought laughter and smiles to your face, I should send the bill but, this is my contribution to humanity.

Lol

...boom!!!

that's how mine started showing plentiful wahala...I requested for 2wks night duty...As he's coming back, am on my way to work making sure that his food are well set on the table.....Would have gotten enough time during the day to chill out with my kids...

Most times we met at the bustop on my way to work....He had to bath,prepare,and drove them to school in the morning.

Only the two weeks morning routine moved his brain to default setting..
Can't come and kill myself....

bukatyne

man's finance is the issue

PeacenLove2 poster=89450632:


During Slavery the white used blacks as agents to carry out their despicable acts. It's the same pattern where it looks like it's the same women setting up their boys to become insensitive to other women's plights. I would say the men are as guilty as the women they used. The agents are always more overzealous

Hmmmm! I love this analogy and agree with you on the overzealous part.

Chinny024:
...boom!!!

that's how mine started showing plentiful wahala...I requested for 2wks night duty...As he's coming back, am on my way to work making sure that his food are well set on the table.....Would have gotten enough time during the day to chill out with my kids...

Most times we met at the bustop on my way to work....He had to bath,prepare,and drove them to school in the morning.

Only the two weeks morning routine moved his brain to default setting..
Can't come and kill myself....

I already like you. Smart woman. Your line of work help to execute this wicked plan . So imagine what some women go through all in the name of marriage.

[quote author=monerozi5590 post=89460733][/quote]
Why the haba na? That sex deprivation caught your attention. Although it might not work because they will start to cheat. Broke cheats and some girls will still follow them.
All is complicated joor.

veave:
Hian.

Wetin I go talk go pain you o. But na the truth I go tell you. Madam, right now I can't tell you to start with 50% so I will say 20%.

Thank God there is covid and I pray your job doesn't get affected. As soon as you resume, the second day you get to work tell him there has been a 40% reduction from your salary due to low inflow of cash. You need to save at least 20% of your salary. This money no Matter if the roof is falling down you're not to touch it. Na your back up money be that. The other 20% is for your upkeep. You and your kids should survive on the remaining 50% because you'd definitely pay tithe. It's because he knows you always have a back up plan that is why he is relaxed and allowing you foot all the bills.
No this kain thing make me say I no go marry "brother" when I dey small. Most of them are lazy and are dreamers. They expect manner to fall from heaven after their praying and fasting forgetting Paul had a handiwork that sustained him all through his life hence he didn't have to beg and depend on anyone. I no dey like this kind jist. He's not even appreciative of his supportive wife. I know women who use all their money to buy shoes, clothes and the latest asoebi, their husbands dare not say pim because they'd even take his own and join.

Exactly!
Every woman needs 'vex money' stashed up somewhere.It helps you stay sane and puts off that feeling of near hopelessness that threatens every once in a while.
That's the first thing I deduct from my salary o and then regular savings in the kids' names.

Take the quoted advice o,stay sane for your kids and bring that beauty back!
This too shall pass.

princessConfy:
seeing this post frightens me more. my relationship of 5 months is giving me headache. he said he can't give me money except I ask. I've tried to explain to him that I'm not good in asking and I don't ask because he said his ex gf used to be too demanding. now I don't know if I ask small he may think I'm pretending if I ask big he may think I'm too demanding. He will ask me to visit and when I want to leave he'll wait till we are almost at the junction before he will ask if I have T.p. anytime we have an argument he will threatened our relationship...
I don tire... cos I don't know if I should continue or quit.. relationship wahala

You are seeing the red flags,you won't adhere to it until it gets late and you start moaning. Cant you see you have financial problems already.He is stingy and hardly released money and that is why he said his ex was disturbing him for money.He doesn't want you to ask him for money the way his ex asked him.He is also unsupportive, insensitive and caring.Haba!your girl visits you and you can't even give her a little cash to show you care.

spartan117:

Lol.
Only virtuous women will understand.

It is not easy.You need the guidance of the holy spirit to do that.

crackkhaus:

Your problem is either you're not working to earn your own income, OR the little money you might be making is little & you don't want to manage it...so in your mind, a boyfriend of 5months asking you if you have transport money is giving you headache.

Break up with him please and stay single for at least one year... it will help you train yourself by learning how to plan your life and work with whatever you have without any boyfriend.

Go and sit down my friend. stop supporting bad behaviour.Even if she is making a billion dollars, that doesn't stop her guy from offering her money,paying for her Uber or cab even if it is small or showing her care. It is up to her to reject it or accept it. The Man is stingy, insensitive and thinks only of himself and that is a red flag.

princessConfy:


I'm working and I do support him. I'm not asking for money for myself. money to buy stuffs for his kitchen. I don't live with him, i dont make money except my salary and it is small. due to this lockdown my expense at home increased. He knows all this. I have never asked him money for myself. He wants me to visit from Monday to Sunday and I work from Monday to Saturday. the least I expect is T.p. cos he invited. I've not gone there on my own without his IV.

You are in trouble o � chai!nna men dey o.Tufiakwa spits!

Honesty001:
It is not easy.You need the guidance of the holy spirit to do that.

Very true. No one can do it without first surrendering his live to the holy spirit.

We should be careful of women who says, I didn't insult my husband, I just raised my voice.
Christian ladies should know the virtue of submission and gratitude.
The day he helped you with the trash, did you say thank you. When the bulb went faulty and he changed it did you call him your hero?

He comes home drunk everyday, the day he came home sober, did you hug him?
He is jobless is not a death sentence,
The day he did an odd job and brought home money, did you rejoice and celebrate him?

Even for a man that is 100% the breadwinner, to some wives, he is still not good enough. He's mistakes are unforgivable and his reward is a lifetime of criticism and not been good enough.

The reason for submission is to win your man over, the reason for love is to win your woman over. When one is down, both are down, when one seeks vengeance both would be destroyed.

Men thrive on praises, it takes a strong man to be strong in criticism, but strength is built...

May your wisdom continue to increase!
The best way to make the wrong judgement in life is to listen to the woman's side of the story alone. A woman will NEVER tell you anything she has done wrong. Never! In matters like this she will paint the picture of how exemplary she has been and how the man is the devil incarnate. Devil, devil, and you born each other 1 million children!

This marriage thing dey fear me self. Perhaps the man is somewhere almost killing himself for his family now, why the wife is silently fantasizing about how to get enough money and run away. Men should really start de-emphasizing marriage; it's more of a scam against men nowadays.

Nwodosis:
It is obvious you are not the talking type but the writing type, we have read your version, how do we get your husband's version? There is no smoke without fire!

Average marriage life especially in Africa because we live without purpose. Every marriage that has this kind prblm na both partner curse am. Christianity just dey confuse us and e don scatter so many things like living together especially in Africa but wen u talk them no go hear them deh claim to know Jesus Christ wen u dont even know about thyselves we have serious marital issues in this part of the world because of our mentality, firstly marriage nobe must, no be do or die affair u try e no work u move with life if you truely know who you are, go thru a self discovery process and u will see clearly that this is not your partner right from the beginning.

Will be more understanding to get his own part for the story before judging but from your own side of the story this happens in many homes and this is clearly because you never took the time to know who you wanted to spend your with and that is clearly because you don't even know about yourself, wanting to grow spiritually and a man telling you he will be a pastor is not enough reason to spend your life with him.

I hate to be the bearer of bad news.

Your husband appears to be a narcissist.

Do u need someone to talk to?Are u lonely? Depressed? Is ur marriage not working? Are u at d verge of divorcing it partner? U don't have a child? U need help? Don't worry... Follow @naughtybynaturemii on her live programs and be glad u did. Fuckers pls stay off.

Nwodosis:
It is obvious you are not the talking type but the writing type, we have read your version, how do we get your husband's version? There is no smoke without fire!

May your days be long.

You women fear them when they start providing at home. Honestly fear them.

MizJaY:
Sorry for the long message but this lockdown period might favour reading long msgs.

I'm the quiet type so I have never opened mouth to insult my husband during any misunderstanding. Just arguments and my voice may go up a bit trying to explain or clear myself but he will start saying im raising my voice and talking back at him and start saying all sorts of things.

Honestly sometimes I wished I could unleash the anger deep down and screammm but I always have self control. If u sit with him, he will give u a million reasons why I'm not a good wife and if u don't know me well, u will fall for it because he tells it so well. I will not say everything he says is false, but 80% is. Only those that really know me, will know he is d one that has problem. He's too difficult at times.

In an office, there's usually that one person that quarrels with everyone am I right? But I end up being d only person that dat person doesn't quarrel with cos I try as much as possible to avoid quarrels that's just d kind of person I am. Calm and quiet.

When I met my husband NYSC days, he was very close to God, organizing programs in church and handling them. That was the main reason I got close to him cos I wasnt so spiritual and needed someone to help me grow spiritually through life. He told me he was called to be a pastor and that excited me but I'm not seeing that now lol. He's spiritual life is almost zero. And back then, he had nothing, we would spend all my money even to reach his sick mother in the village I would buy all the foodstuff to send to her.

The way he talked he sounded promising that things will get better with him, but today, I still suffer, I have no savings, all my salary is on the house. He works too and earns but he's salary covers rent and the children's school fees finished. I do the rest but he doesn't appreciate the fact that I sacrifice everything I earn to feeding the house. We are family of 6. Everything provision, food, children school snack, fuel for car and gen, gas filing etc etc it's me. And that's how my whole salary will just go fiam.

if I ws getting a little appreciation I for no mind but rather I get insults o. It's my fault that
Money is finished, it's my fault that we have no savings, I don't know how to manage money, I'm hoarding my money etc etc those are d words that come out of his mouth o.

I used to be a beautiful woman but no more, I wear one shoe everyday to work, can't buy myself clothes shoes nothing I had to cut my hair to relieve myself from hair money lol. I'm stressed out thinking of where money will come for feeding when my salary gets finished before month end at times I have to beg my sister or my dad a pensioner or hussle one way or d other. I now developed high bp and today I'm living with hypertension taking drugs everyday. It was my parents that gave my husband d job he's doing today. He is not in talking terms with he's dad n siblings. Before he's mother died, things were not too good between them. My husband likes to always form man of d house and want me to apologise whenever there's a misunderstanding saying that I am d one wrong, I'm always wondering how am always the one wrong and he's not � every time.

Sometimes self I don't know what I did that mks him angry he will just start carrying face. Today makes it a week we are not talking cos he has been carrying face since 7days now, and went to post something on wassap yesterday that a woman that cannot apologise to her husband cannot stay in marriage.

My brothers and sisters if I know of anything I did that I have to apologise for yet I refused to apologise that is making him carry face, may God strike me. If u know I did anything wrong why not come to me and tell me u don't like what I did and tell me what i did rather than carry face up n down. He always does that. At times I do ask him and as usual am always d one at fault. Maybe it's cos I'm a quiet person he's taking me for mumu.

The national anthem now is that because he does not have money that's why I don't respect him the way I'm supposed to. I'm always careful with my word when gisting with him cos make I make mistake say Donald duke is d current governor of rivers state haaa problem don enter and it may spoil d sweet gisting we were having. He go almost insult me and become uninterested in gisting with me again cos i don talk mumu talk.

So how can I handle such man cos if no be say I be quiet person, I for don receive serious beating black and blue from this man cos he has done it earlier on in our marriage not serious beating sha but I had some bruises. If not that my parents are still alive and warned him. Tho he still attempts once in a blue moon I go jus arrange myself. But I'm kind of tired. I have no money cos trust me, if I had, Maybe i for don dey plan my move sef I no dey enjoy marriage life at all

your husband is an abusive man. The day he will beat you black blue or u lose one eye it might be too late. What example is your husband giving your sons or daughters?? You need to stand your ground o. Else you’ll keep being miserable. Life is too short to spend the most of it unhappy

nnamdibig:
You are the man dear marrying him as your wife.
sorry about that.

But one thing I will assure you is that if you don't leave this man, you will most likely die before your time.

she already got hypertension