Ujujoan:

so you dont share anything that belongs to your spouse

You don't tounch h/her properties cos it's not yours

I guess I'm yuet to understand the big deal about phones . . . except of course someone has something to hide!

Flexskillz: There's nothing wrong if she wants T☺ read my sms but it might save her a whole lot of trouble иot to bother herself too much with it as long as she trusts me like i trust her.

Anybody can send any type of sms if they want to, just Щhat if someone is playin mischeif with me and sends a 'i love u or i miss u so much' kind of sms, does that mean i have something with them!

So to save her the whole "wahala" its better if she keeps off. Anyway if the above scenario were to play out we will talk about it so no issue.

Kobojunkie:

OK . . . so why are you INSECURE about picking it up to read . . If you believe that?

Mrs..Chima:
Not everyone hides their phones....my husband doesn't hide his phone and neither do I. We still don't read each other texts....NOW WHAT?

Flexskillz: There's nothing wrong if she wants T☺ read my sms but it might save her a whole lot of trouble иot to bother herself too much with it as long as she trusts me like i trust her.

Anybody can send any type of sms if they want to, just Щhat if someone is playin mischeif with me and sends a 'i love u or i miss u so much' kind of sms, does that mean i have something with them!

So to save her the whole "wahala" its better if she keeps off. Anyway if the above scenario were to play out we will talk about it so no issue.

slimyem: i do not have to have anything to hide.
Its called mutual respect for each other's personal stuff....especially if there's no reason for distrust!
My partner tells me everything(or so i believe)...and i do the same.
If there's something he's not telling me,then he probably has a good reason why he's not.
That's trust...and except something changes that,his phone is his and mine's mine!

slimyem: i do not have to have anything to hide.
Its called mutual respect for each other's personal stuff....especially if there's no reason for distrust!
My partner tells me everything(or so i believe)...and i do the same.
If there's something he's not telling me,then he probably has a good reason why he's not.
That's trust...and except something changes that,his phone is his and mine's mine!

Mrs..Chima:


Don't forget lack of trust.

And why are you reading texts that weren't directed to you?

Ujujoan:

What has that even got to do with trust

I pick up any phone and automatically go through it without thinking, yes even the SMSs.

I read my mum's, sister's. friend's SMS and I doubt that makes me insecure!

If there's any text message I dont want people to see, I delete from my phone. I dont care if people go through my inbox, not at all!

Ujujoan:


So it's ok for him to hide something from you, but not ok for you to read his text message

Flexskillz: There's nothing wrong if she wants T☺ read my sms but it might save her a whole lot of trouble иot to bother herself too much with it as long as she trusts me like i trust her.

Anybody can send any type of sms if they want to, just Щhat if someone is playin mischeif with me and sends a 'i love u or i miss u so much' kind of sms, does that mean i have something with them!

So to save her the whole "wahala" its better if she keeps off. Anyway if the above scenario were to play out we will talk about it so no issue.

dasparrow:

I can never tolerate a friend just picking up my phone and going through my text messages. I don't care how close we are. I will not tolerate it from my siblings either. I am a very private person and my privacy means alot to me. It may have to do with the fact that I was very trusting of people (friends, acquintances, family members, etc) in the past and got screwed up severally by some people who betrayed the trust I had for them. So, I am not willing to put myself out there like that again. My phone is my personal property so if I did not explicitly give a person permission to touch or go through my phone, I don't want anyone touching or going through my phone or text messages. Shikena!

afam4eva: I think it's imperative that people learn the 1diocyncrasies of marriage before deciding whether to go into it or not.

Do you think it's a joke when they see, you're and your partner have become one in Marriage? What is means is that there'll be no more "My phone" or "My prick", rather it should be "Our phone" and "Our prick". If you can't come to accept the fact that you'll have to share everything with your spouse then marriage is not for you.

Ujujoan:


Obviosuly I wont be stupid enough to leave any 'incriminating' text message in my phone if I had anything to hide!

MRbrownJAY:

the point is/was: would you find it disrespectful if he did?

whether that person hides it OR doesnt not want you to read it etc, it is the same thing.
as much as I understand that there would be a clear lack of trust (aka problem) if your partner wants to CHECK your phone every time you get a text, i doubt it can be considered disrespectful if they simply have a glance at it once in a while.

slimyem: i do not have to have anything to hide.
Its called mutual respect for each other's personal stuff....especially if there's no reason for distrust!
My partner tells me everything(or so i believe)...and i do the same.
If there's something he's not telling me,then he probably has a good reason why he's not.
That's trust...and except something changes that,his phone is his and mine's mine!

afam4eva:
You're right that anybody could send a mischievous messsage to your phone. That's why you should discuss it with your spouse. Hiding it will only make matters worse. Imagine if your spouse eventually finds the message some weeks later and checks the date it was sent and discovers that the message is a week old, what do you think he'll think. I guess his wife will start explaining to him that it's a mischievous message and that she was planning of telling him but but but...Many marriages have broken because some people decide not to be sincere with their spouse.

freecocoa: This is why you shouldn't read anyone's sms before them, just in case.

Ujujoan:


So it's ok for him to hide something from you, but not ok for you to read his text message

dasparrow:

I can never tolerate a friend just picking up my phone and going through my text messages. I don't care how close we are. I will not tolerate it from my siblings either. I am a very private person and my privacy means alot to me. It may have to do with the fact that I was very trusting of people (friends, acquintances, family members, etc) in the past and got screwed up severally by some people who betrayed the trust I had for them. So, I am not willing to put myself out there like that again. My phone is my personal property so if I did not explicitly give a person permission to touch or go through my phone, I don't want anyone touching or going through my phone or text messages. Shikena!

afam4eva:
There's no such thing as mutual respect in marriage. That is left for one night stand and business partner.

afam4eva: I think it's imperative that people learn the 1diocyncrasies of marriage before deciding whether to go into it or not.

Do you think it's a joke when they see, you're and your partner have become one in Marriage? What is means is that there'll be no more "My phone" or "My prick", rather it should be "Our phone" and "Our prick". If you can't come to accept the fact that you'll have to share everything with your spouse then marriage is not for you.

Mrs..Chima:


Even if they discuss it with the spouse...is that going to change the spouse's mentality if he or she suspected infidelity?

No it will not....will the spouse reading text messages stop cheating or other people from sending bullshit? No, it will not.

So again...what is the point

afam4eva:
There's no such thing as mutual respect in marriage. That is left for one night stand and business partner.

Kobojunkie:

OH, I totally agree !!!

afam4eva:
I think my post is kinda similar to the topic of discussion so i thought i should post it.

afam4eva:
The point is that you as a spouse should not make a concerted effort to hide anything from your spouse because it might come back to hunt you. If he chooses not to read your messages then it's his choice but you should know that he reserves the full rights to open your A*nus. Yeah, he's your husband and you bargained for it when you said "I DO".