Broke up with my ex close to a month now. We dated for 18 months. Currently now am single and sort of enjoying my freedom. She was double dating and at the same time telling me lies lies lies.

I found out and d break up turned nasty. She didn't really give a hoot about the breakup because she wanted me to read in between the lines but i failed to.(avoiding me, giving excuses, stopped calling and wouldn't return my calls/sms, etc)

She seems to be very happy wit her new dummy. Now the problem am having is how to get her outta my system. Her thoughts always creep into my mind during my quiet moments (the good times we shared together, the sexx, money lavished on her, the deceit, lies, etc) and it makes me so sad.

It's obvious we r never going to get back together. Am trying so hard to resist the temptation of calling her(i have her number up in my head). I've disposed of everything that reminds me of her but her thoughts keep coming back.

Please how do i ward this off.

Thanks a lot.

To survive in this naija babes world, you need to be an expert at killing thoughts. Whenever her tot comes to ur mind, just kill the marafacking tot. Once you become an expert in killing tots, you shall have more future break ups and they will never again affect your tots in anyway.

ik121: Broke up wit my ex close to a month nw. We dated for 18months. Currently nw am single nd sort of enjoyin my freedom. She was double dating nd at d same time telin me lies lies lies. I found out nd d break up turned nasty. She ddnt rlly giv a hoot about d break up cos she wanted me to read in btwn d lines bt i failed to.(avoiding me, givin excuses, stopd callin nd wudnt return my calls/sms, etc) She seems to be veri happi wit her new dummy. Now d problem m havin is hw to get her outta my system. Her tots always creep into my mind during my quiet moments (the good times we shared togeda, the intimacy, money lavishd on her, the deciet, lies, etc) nd it meks me so sad. It's obvious we r neva gonna get bac togeda. Am trying so hard to resist the temptation of calling her(i hav her number up in my head) i'v disposd of evrytn dat reminds me of her bt her tots kip comming bac. Plz how do i ward dis off. Tnks alot.

its not going to be easy. but the only thing i will advise you on is never ever try to contact her ever again.
i cannot stress this more.

the moment you get past that stage of not wanting to contact her then you are on your way to recovery.

if you do contact her it will only make you look weak and pathetic.

Pele guy but you just have to find a way to get her out before it causes something else to you. How about some music? Or always be among friends

It's kind of difficult, that's why 'fools' shouldn't fall in love...

Get busy and go out more, that might help...

But hey, I don't know, I can't get over my ex as well lol...

Devote ur free moments to something new, watch as many movie u cn afford......n dnt forget to pray too....all will be well, welcome aboard....naija babes mtcheeeew..

Get busy with friendzzz. Avoid idleness to the very least. With that, you'll gradually get ur mind off. It worked for me.

DO every other thing without thinking of her. Listen to music (I prefer gospel music), watch films, soccer just live your life naturally and think less of her. Before you realize it she is outta your system..

You have too much energy to spare ; Burn those energy with more work, learning, movies, make new friends, I mean plenty of them. This not the best time to be in any relationship, clear your head with all these task, and learn to forget her no, and everthing about her. Change your daily routine and also pray that GOD should help you move on.

Always tell your self this 'LIFE GOES ON'

This is what i did when my happened.

1. First i forgave her, don't hold a grudge (which is really hard)

2. Break up is never one person's fault, i am not taking side but learn from this experience.

3. A broken relationship is better than a broken marriage.

See it has Pain to Purpose....the reason for the breakup is because there is someone better (there is always someone better)

Peace Bro.

Focus on what you can do best in life eg career, education, play arround with friends etc. join group in your church in short get your self missing up with people always.

If you get money try to get 2 bottles of hennesy per day but if you not that financial bouyant you can buy chelsea and mix with coke.


And more also... Dont forget to patronise all these local strumpets... They chargge like 300 per round back then but i dont knos how much they charge now bcus of subsidy.

I bet you.... You will come back and asked for my i.d.

The truth is all these ...meet new people,get involved in activities and blah blah nor dey work.
You'll think you are getting over someone by filling up your time with activities when in truth, you are just pushing your pain and hurt aside.
You'll do all of those things and those unwanted thoughts would come to fore, creep into your mind and almost overwhelm u every chance they get.
The one thing i know that can help u get over an ex is TIME..although in varied amounts depending on lots of things from how long the relationship lasted to how much emotions were involved.
All the best!

Mynd_44: Pele guy but you just have to find a way to get her out before it causes something else to you. How about some music? Or always be among friends

Music won't do it, especially blues as they'll only make him go back to remnisce the good times they shared.
I'd suggest he gets close to his cheating ex. Yes I said 'close'; But dis time, he has to take his mind off her. Making her look/seem like sum regular friend he never had anything wit might just be the tonic he needs to forget abt her completely.

Mynd_44: Pele guy but you just have to find a way to get her out before it causes something else to you. How about some music? Or always be among friends

Music won't do it, especially blues as they'll only make him go back to remnisce the good times they shared.
I'd suggest he gets close to his cheating ex. Yes I said 'close'; But dis time, he has to take his mind off her. Making her look/seem like sum regular friend he never had anything wit might just be the tonic he needs to forget abt her completely.

@OP.. get into one of her sexy friends and shag the bjezus out of her always works

Simply put, STAY BUSY

Please my new babe is from Aluu community. Do i go ahead to marry her or go back to my ex?

Look 4 work...
Stay away 4m serious relationships 4 now.
Jst try nd get 5 new bitches 2 cool your conji.

Get a PS3 3 and try buy Evolution 13 playing that all day will not make you think about her anymore. It works

There is nothing you can do about it for now.. its a matter of time..

The feelings we fade away with time

if you keep tinking about your ex,u will never see ur next.With time,u will surely forget about all the things you both shared but i will still advice you on what i saw here on nairaland.
"The only mistake i have made in a relationship is getting into a relationship,Never get into a relationship when you are not ready to settle down"
All the best

Bro..send her a mail from d heart..pour out ur heart man..start from when u met her ,d gd times u shared plus d bad times,then how she cheated etc..thank her for comin into ur life nd for all she did in ur life..end d mail by tellin her ow disappointed u r..but u hv forgiven her..bro it works..just do dis man..nd get busy..plus get tons of mojo nd watch man..it worx too

My dear, i understand perfectly wat u are going tru. It happened to me, and i was sharttered, i lost my sanity then. I even resigned frm my job and relocated to anoda city.( but, dont try it)
All u nid to do, its to alwyz remember her bad sides, the bad memories of her. Her flaws, etc. Bfore, u knw it, she will belong to ur past and neva to come back. Also, open your hrt to pple, hang out, mix with your loved ones, laugh your sorrows away.
Hey!! I knw u re strong, i knw u re a fighter, dont allow her to get to you. Show her there is more to lyf to enjoy and knwing her was a mistake. Go out there!! Be your happy self!! And move on....!!!

You'll always have the flash backs except the soul tie between both of you is broken.
If you are born again, pray this prayer points please.
1. Every evil between me and my past sexual partners, break break break in the name of Jesus.
2. Every soul tie between me and my past sexual partners, break by the thunder fire of God in the name of Jesus.
Alternatively, you can go to any mountain of fire and miracles ministry for counselling and helps.

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