(phew! Dear Lord, please help me pass across this message in a way only you can, amen.)

You did not catch him in the act. In fact, as far as you were concerned, he would never smell such. Then he comes home one day sober and weather beaten, at first you are scared he may have lost his job, but he tells you its worse than you think. with a contrite spirit, deflated ego, tail in between his legs, he stoops... and in between quivering lips, and barely audible mutters, he begs you for forgiveness... why? ..he slipped....he cheated on you... Sister, so many of us have found ourselves on this all-too-familia r stage... ...betrayal, hurt, hate, pain, ache, all trying to burst through...a combustible blend. If you will permit me sis, this is my humble submission. Men are not wired to kiss and tell. oh no they are not. For them. whatever happens in 'Vegas' stays in Vegas. So if you have a man who brings the error, regrets and pains of 'Vegas' home and asks for forgiveness, then, sis lovely, you have got a man to whom you matter so much and that is so so important. Not all men give two hoots how you feel even if you find out. Gather yourself after the initial shock and reaction. brace yourself like the strong woman that you are. wrap him round cover him up. He is hurting that[s why he told you. you are also hurting that's why you reacted. Heal together. Help each other. This is not the time for the 'couch treatment' and family confab. oh no, not yet sis. The way you handle this delicate stage is so very important and will determine the course of your relationship. It will determine, in most cases, if he will go back to 'Vegas' or come back home to you. Don't forget, Men will naturally give you their future if they can recall your maturity in yesterday's issues. This is not a 'bullet proof' solution but it sure keeps some pellets away... by Lara Owoeye-wise