@ simayanki

am so so diappointed o...
wetin cause dis kind yans nau..
if u had issues wit her culdnt u av just resolved it back stage...
d reason i didnt quote is cos i believe u wukd come n edit ur post...
dat was totally uncalled for,even if u had knw her personally...
everybody makes mistake..
but ability to rise up n learn from it is wat makes us stronger...

@simayanki. The thread is basically for the ladies but the fact that they allowed us to flex a little does not mean we should disrespect them. They are our babies,sisters,wives and mothers. As a 'baba' u definitely gat skills,that last thing i want is for u not to be involved here,u just have to be humble that is all. So please on behalf of simayankibaba the OGIDIOLU II of all feminine issues conflictin man,i would like to apologize for hurtin the delicate sensibilities of any dollander involved especially to blanchiedoll, carmidoll,metchetra and etchetra. So, baba u suggestin i keep it cool as regards to the issue at play?. Aight then i will, thanks for everything.

Whew! It wasn't nice that Mr Simayanki's nerves got touched on and he blew off and spoilt all his good and wise write-ups here. His posts showed that he got irritated at first, controlled it and when he couldn't hold it anymore blew off.

I noticed his very very wise posts for the first time and had to go back to read his other posts in this thread. I give it up to him, that young man is a whirlwind. Intelligent and open minded. He has a sound mind. I am even trying to match make him off to somebody right now, seriously! . I am working behind the scene, talking to the nice lady right now. Lol .(Had to think of somebody else for him because he isn't a match for me & I also saw a thread where he is searching ). I am serious about that, we all have to be our sister's and brother's keeper and not come here to open hands for the Lord when we can help others initiate things .

Simayanki pls when you return to the thread do be a gent and apologise to Carmelion and Doncolio. I understand that we can't all like one another very much or agree with the view of all, there is also a tendency for people with strong characters to disagree sometimes. I don't agree 100% with all of Dailynews view but I still appreciate some other sides of him which he displays here and which appeals to me. To me he isn't perfect like all of us but I won't insult him or throw acidic words at him because i disagree with him. I disagree respectfully.

ichidodo: @simayanki. The thread is basically for the ladies but the fact that they allowed us to flex a little does not mean we should disrespect them. They are our babies,sisters,wives and mothers. As a 'baba' u definitely gat skills,that last thing i want is for u not to be involved here,u just have to be humble that is all. So please on behalf of simayankibaba the OGIDIOLU II of all feminine issues conflictin man,i would like to apologize for hurtin the delicate sensibilities of any dollander involved especially to blanchiedoll, carmidoll,metchetra and etchetra. So, baba u suggestin i keep it cool as regards to the issue at play?. Aight then i will, thanks for everything.

That's sweet of you Ichidodo, you are already apologising for him. Good gents we've got here.

This is one of the reasons i never get to share my feelings with anyone especially when i'm down because instead of the help you look forward to,all you get are harsh words and insults hauled @ you,can't believe i have tears in my eyes already,that just hurts more..you all have a nice day.

nbright: Very SILENT

lolz! Being seeing your own contributions too......you ar gud dude! Kip it going.

nbright: Very SILENT

lolz! Being seeing your own contributions too......you ar gud dude! Kip it going..

missblanche: Whenever i hear the word "marriage" my heart just skips a bit and get filled with fear,love is a very complicated issue for me,i remember when my aunt was about 31,good job,a car but no man but she was the sweetest person i know,she would cry every night because no man was coming,funny enough a man came along,when they got married,it was war,it was as if they never loved each other,that made me terrified,she has two boys but i'm still scared because i don't think she got married because she loved him..its even scarier for me because i look like an 18 yrs teenager and the funny truth is that i'm close to 30..each time i go out...i get approached by small boys and its so f..king annoying and then really old guys come along also and i wonder what da heck is wrong with me..everyone says i should be grateful for my body including my dad and sometimes i feel the body is not helping..

@Miss Blanche
I think that you should take Carmelion's advice over dressing and getting hairdos that don't spell out your petiteness, I understand the angle Simayanki was coming from in saying that you should be yourself but I also know that it is the feet that wears the shoe that knows where it pinches it. I had a school mate that is petite and you will always see her hanging on an "akpola/shoes with tall heels" and you can't blame the poor lady that wants to look a bit tall biko. My youngest brother is looking around for a lady to marry and has introduced a young lady to I and my sister and we advised him to be sure that he really really likes her before proceeding with marriage, this is because we noticed that he always adds a "but" when talking about her and says something like "she is Petite" but she's still nice---which shows that he is wishing that she is bigger.

Now for a young man like that that wishes for a woman that isn't petite, i won't advise him to go for a petite person so that he doesn't end up not feeling very proud of her someday or even making a young lady feel worthless because she isn't as huge as he preferred his wife to be. . At the other hand, there are people that appreciate a person without minding that she/he isn't all that tall and huge etc so being petite doesn't mean that it will be hard for you to find a mate. Wear all the high heels you want, dress to look huge all you want----(you are a lady and i understand how that feels) but don't let the petiteness knock down your self esteem. Go ahead carrying yourself good, your prince will still love you and your size when he arrives. Just check out this Shaq O'neal giant and his girlfriend(hope they are still together sha), did you see how much taller and bigger Shaq is than that lady? Do you also see how lovingly he bends down to love that woman good? Aw-aw-aw-aw, isn't that lovely?

missblanche: This is one of the reasons i never get to share my feelings with anyone especially when i'm down because instead of the help you look forward to,all you get are harsh words and insults hauled @ you,can't believe i have tears in my eyes already,that just hurts more..you all have a nice day.

Cheer up doll, I'm sure these people will return to the thread and make up. Don't let these get to you, don't even shed tears over this okay Baby? Hugs to you.

simayanki4real:
--------
@miss blanche: look your best but be moderate about everything but most of all be mindful of places where you would get such unwanted attention. Be confident about yourself, don't be perturbed about people's perception of you & am sure there's a space in someone's heart big enough just for you to fill.

Do take this post seriously. It has a wealth of stuff loaded therein for you.

simayanki4real:

@ doncolio: its obvious you live in oblivion of what women really want, am pretty sure it stares you in the face but you cannot get a hold of it! Well i'm sure carmelion who know so well about women will enlighten you.

@carmelion: Its a well chosen name for you, just want to let you know that this is not HOW YOU GET REDEMPTION FOR YOUR MISTAKES! Am sure depression has eaten you up, self confidence has tied you up, arrogance would always be your companion but what you so desperately seek deep down the cherade of a stony heart you claim to have is the so-called LOVE & MARRIAGE you preach against is what you actually crave for in the lonliness of your heart. Is the very thing that eats you up when you lie down & when you wake up... So you wake up & think your frustration is to start a thread that blames all the mistakes you have committed right from your university days uptill now on MEN NO! NO! NO! Your redemption wouldn't come so SWIFTLY.

Ladies in the house, there exists beyond the extremities of the universe and comprehension of the greatest minds, the divinity & solemnity of LOVE & MARRIAGE! The only way to achieve you heart's desire is to be yourself. Listen to peoples experiences but make your decisions prayerfully....Don't let people who are depressed by certain mistakes they have made in life, lure you... BE WISE! Take care pals.

Simayanki signing out 4real!

guy u forkup. there was no need for the outburst

missblanche: @ carmelion:thanks barbie i love gowns,especially the long ones and i'm so used to not exposing my legs cus they are slightly bow and i'm skinny so i do jeans all the freaking time but i think that i would get some gowns ..thanks a lot

you are welcome doll ,you might also want to take to simiyakis advice. Believe in yourself,be confident(we have been saying that here).

carmelion:

you are welcome doll ,you might also want to take to simiyakis advice. Believe in yourself,be confident(we have been saying that here).

You are still a darling Carm doll.
Some other person would have been quarelling down the roof at Simayanki, he better return here quickly and apologise to you before he ceases to be my favorite poster in the thread lol.

Hello house,goodmorning.i believe we all slept well?.when I read simiyakis last post,I was puzzled.I became confused cos,I began to wonder if the handle,'Miss blanche' and 'simiyaki4real' belongs to the same people.I mean I was talking to Miss blanche and other ladies in the house.

But then on the other hand I read through his comments again and the bolder sentence really caught my attention

simayanki4real:

This is real funny@carmdoll...

If i am correct your advice is ladies should delibrately look old to avoid young attention?? How ludicrious.

S o i suspected that maybe, he is angry that am trying to spoil his show cos ,I know some men like older women.So to clear my doubt,i decided to go through his profile .lo and behold my suspicion was confirmed.Click the link below ,you would see where I got the comment i posted, from.



https://www.nairaland.com/1017460/im-love-someone-older-than#11816270

Simayanki4real: Bro, it doesn't matta hw old she is. Two things mata 2me abt a lady.
1) If she luks older dan u &
2) Hw she feels if she knws she's olda.

Means go av2 tell ha. If she loves you, she respect u & stay! Av always lovd olda women, cuz dey're always so mature & attentive, not much jealousy like most lousy grls.

Simiyaki,Sorry if you love older women,but i just hope you always meet those who like younger men.YOU mentioned somewhere on this thread that you have had your own share of the heart break.

Now let me tell you why these women leave you,it is because they are older than you,the pressure on them from their peers/family is just too much,so they had to leave you for an older guy who seem to be ready.

I advised Soyedele,here on page 25 when he complained about how a working class lady who is 26 years old turned him down because he was still a student.I told him that the lady might like him but ,time,is the problem.the lady is 26<that is 4 yrs shy of the almighty 30.How long would she wait for him?I advised him to go for a younger lady, so that by the time she is out of school,and done with service,he would have been financially stable to marry her.


As for those thing you said to me there,am human,you know,it got to me.But then I bounced back cos you don't know me outside nairaland.I also want you to know that before ,i opened this thread,i thought about the praises i would get,i also thought of the insults i would receive.but then the fact that i would reach out to other single ladies strengthened me.It is ok.


I want you to know that you were not the 1st to insult me,(check out Madlion's post in the beginning of the thread),and you will not be the last.Others will still come or is it not Nairaland again?lol.


But I have a message for you and any body that would try to depress the single ladies here.THIS THREAD HAS NOT EVEN STARTED.It will start when we all starts announcing that we are now in a serious relationship, with that special man that has made us to sincerely believe that all men are not the same.Relationships that would lead to marrriage. Don't waste your MB coming to check whether it has happened.I will personally send you a mail.

I also pray for you sincerely, to find that special woman whose past is 'clean'.There are plenty good women on earth but locating them is the problem cos they are rare.Besides they are still in the mist of ALL THE WOMEN.If only you know how difficult it is to know the history of your spouse,if only you know.I rest my case.

speechless......

Apologies on his behalf to all d dolls...

That comment touched me!! Worry less Carmie!

aaaaaaaawwwwwwwwwww.....carmiedoll, if only we cld av more pple lyk u on nairaland! I also apologize on his behalf but he should come here and do the apologies himself. Don't let him get to you, i believe you're a good person with a good heart, even if ur past is a lil bit messy, ur ability to learn from it, forgive urself and become a better person is what makes u a GOOD PERSON! So, i plead with you again, don't mind Simayanki. Dt post got me startled also cos i didn;t just understand where it was coming from. Maybe he had a bad day at work yesterday



[s]apparently, i've not unfollowed the thread[/s]

missblanche: This is one of the reasons i never get to share my feelings with anyone especially when i'm down because instead of the help you look forward to,all you get are harsh words and insults hauled @ you,can't believe i have tears in my eyes already,that just hurts more..you all have a nice day.

Baby-doll, please dont cry, if u cry i will cry o! As a sweet beautiful and sensitive lady that u are you should realize that he made a mistake of which am glad he did because i was beginning to think he was super-man. Nobody is perfect and we all make mistakes the least u can do is to forgive and forge ahead. Now tell me you are not crying *big teddy bear huggs*

Simayanki has very good advice especially from a guy's point of view. I totally endorse most of them as they have mostly been in the interest of this thread. But it shuldnt be a do or die advice. And I wasn't expecting some1 with those post to give such a twist, so you are forgiven even before you apologise.
Self confidence comes from the inside not the outside (most ladies don't know),so its about a ladies carriage just like a guy's charisma.
A man is attracted to a lady first by her look(the spark) and then on to her attitude. But he considers her for marriage based on her attitude(that's how we develop the love,after we lust) since this determines if he'll be able to spend the rest of his life with her or not. This marks the boundary between being a gf and a wife.

I'm disappointed that a lot of the comments havnt done justice to the thread.. Why must some members derail every thread?
Btw, one thing I know for sure is that NO MAN who's sure that a lady is the right one for him wld abandon her.. It applies to guys too... There's always a reason why he/she left.. U may have passed the wrong message... A friend once left a lady just becos she said he greeted too many people along d road on one of her visits.. He didn't tell her but he knew right there that she wld cause lots of trouble as a wife.. My point is,don't always assume that he left cos he's a player or not serious;let us all try to look inwards first.. No one is perfect but d moment u convince ur dream man/woman that ure d right person,ure on ur way to being hooked...Ps-some yrs back,I once thot a lady left me cos I was still a corper and not working,only to find out that her fiance now(who she left me for) is even 'worse' than I am. That was when I knew it cld be abt me NOT my pocket cos I didn't do some tins I ought to have done... Being single shd be a time for self examination before another relationship... God bless us all.

@ ivynwa, sent you a pm....... The alliswell email has been disabled

Ivynwa:



That's sweet of you Ichidodo, you are already apologising for him. Good gents we've got here.

*blush*

nbright: That's what I also noticed... Might soon do like my friend smartie gurl and be a VERY SILENT FOLLOWER .

Lolz! Buh i love your contributions.

@smartie girl,bukatayne,ivynwa,lutadoll,thank you.

@miss blanche,cheer up doll,its one of those things

@the guys,thanks for all your advice

@the new members,doncoliio,alora lord,Ayodot,realking and dagr8(not so new)especially causewahala,you re welcomed to the thread. Don't mind us o,we are not always like this but you know,here is full of people with different views and background. So we all must not agree.

@ All,thanks for holding down the thread. Like I said we all must not agree but let us not get things personal. If someone says something,please be sure you understood the post before you comment.

If you disagree,please do that in a civilised manner. Feel free to post anything you want,say your mind but please remember the purpose of the thread.
I actually opened this thread for single ladies but am happy that the guys joined us too.

From their comments I have learnt a lot about men,and what they expect from women. Our world and their world are different so ,sometimes we get confused about how best to compliment each other.

To the single Ladies,there is a story/an experience I would share here,but I would save it for any day am less busy,perhaps on a weekend. I don't really know what to call it but Its about your safety as a woman. We should really be mindful about how we stay out when it is dark.

Thanks everyone ,goodmorning

@ Carmelion

Sweet girl.
You know I once read some of your post and wondered why the guys are not seeing well enough to simply sweep you off your feet . Do have a day full of good for you and don't mind that Simayanki boy. Don't let him get to you, okay Baby? Hugs to you.

Thanks ivynwa,wooow, that's a big teddy bear you 've got there!

there are some dolls,i have not seen it in awhile

@Mayapretty,rubi26,rita lewisky,Auntynurse,greedoll,Cowgurl,Caracta,Humblebygrace,
Ampeaceful,Graphy,Sheybor,evelyn006,eihmub,Bec,Cutjay,Anitank,Winneygirl'
all the ladies that once posted on the thread,i hope you re all okay?

@Edelweiss,thanks for stopping by,i know you must have been very busy,
you left when the thread was on page 18,just keep up at your own pace,
hope business is going on well?

These guys are missing. lol,Chikeorji,Honerico,Dahonestboss,Dipwaters,ITbomb,2buff,Soyedele,
Dailynews,Phinalphantasy,Simpleyeahmee,
passionate88,Kabonic,Charliemorgano,Rooneyboy,Meilyn,Kengali eeeem,i hope am not forgetting anyone?.Xyoung,Madrista007.SamjonnyB,Biolabee,phew!.hope you guys are doing great?
take it easy with the hustling .

The list is so long mehn,just checking on everyone.

Before we went on a short break ,we were discussing about a lady accepting a proposal from a guy who is still squatting with either a friend or a married brother.From a woman's point of view, i kicked against it,but then i decided to throw it to the guys and it seems,they are against it too.


I brought that topic up because ,in as much as i cannot rule out the fact that some women are materialistic,there are also some basic things a man should have before approaching a lady. Accommodation should be the first thing. I was surprised at the responses we got from the guys,I was thinking there own views would be different.


I saw this thread in the romance section,It is something similar to what we discussed though not exactly.She is pregnant for a guy who is still squatting with his brother.

https://www.nairaland.com/1210012/im-pregnant-what

With this i would advise any young lady to be very careful in her current relationship.This topic is very sensitive,so I would not say ,you should not date a guy because he does not have accommodation. I mean it is just for the main time. But I can comfortably say don't start what you can not finish,you should protect your own interest by making sure you don't get pregnant,in fact you have to be very selfish about that.

I would not hammer too much on "no sex" ,I mean we hear that everyday,but if you must,then I won't hesitate to preach 'condom".No Oral contraceptives please.

Most guys,would choose to skin dive,any day,anytime,and i know most ladies including me back then,decides to give in out of pity/love.I mean we want to give our man the best .It is not the best option you know,a lot could go wrong and all those love would vanish.

To the guys,perhaps i don't know what it feels like to have an attention and how men feel emotionally,but i feel we should always avoid putting the cart before the horse .You won't know how unprepared you are to be a dad until the news is broken to you.Protect the interest of your girl,she might be 30yrs and also a graduate but still not know anything about being a woman.Yes it is very possible.Some people are just so ignorant. Please don't take advantage of that.Do not say she is a big girl,she should know how to take care of her self.Use the condom

This story in the link below is similar to what i just talked about.His girlfriend is pregnant and he was not prepared.The news can throw you into confusion,and get you disorganized.

https://www.nairaland.com/1215270/gf-pregnant-not-ready-wat.


Back to the ladies,you suffer it more when you get preggy out of wedlock,I mean the guy wont stop his school or job or hide with you when you get pregnant. When you get infected,no one would take those drugs with you.You know sometimes we hear some stories,and we feel,it was cooked up,or 'it cant happen to me'.Please don't go too close to find out if they are real or not.Just grab the lessons and apply them sensibly.

carmelion: Thanks ivynwa,wooow, that's a big teddy bear you 've got there!

there are some dolls,i have not seen it in awhile

@Mayapretty,rubi26,rita lewisky,Auntynurse,greedoll,Cowgurl,Caracta,Humblebygrace,Ampeaceful,Graphy,Sheybor,evelyn006,eihmub,Bec,Cutjay,Anitank,Winneygirl'all the ladies that once posted on the thread,i hope you re all okay?

@Edelweiss,thanks for stopping by,i know you must have been very busy,you left when the thread was on page 18,just keep up at your own pace,hope bussiness is going on well?

These guys are missing.
lol,chikeorji,Honerico,dahonestboss,dipwaters,Soyedele,Dailynews,Phinalphantasy,Simpleyeahmee,Kabonic,charliemorgano,rooneyboy,Meilyn,kengali eeeem,i hope am not forgetting anyone?.Xyoung,Madrista007.SamjonnyB,Biolabee,phew!.hope you guys are doing great?take it easy with the hustling .

The list is so long mehn,just checking on everyone.

awwww, Thanks for checking.
I've been busy with job search. You know companies prolong the recruitment process to run into months and there are so many stages of tests and interviews.

Thanks Carm. I've actually been reading and learning silently.
About your last post, you are so right.... I always want to give my best in a relationship, but I discovered that a woman is usually at the receiving end most of the time and sometimes one just has to learn how to say no with wisdom.

carmelion: Thanks ivynwa,wooow, that's a big teddy bear you 've got there!

there are some dolls,i have not seen it in awhile

These guys are missing. lol,chikeorji,Honerico,dahonestboss,dipwaters,Soyedele,Dailynews,Phinalphantasy,Simpleyeahmee,Kabonic,charliemorgano,rooneyboy,Meilyn,kengali eeeem,i hope am not forgetting anyone?.Xyoung,Madrista007.SamjonnyB,Biolabee,phew!.hope you guys are doing great?take it easy with the hustling .

The list is so long mehn,just checking on everyone.

Not missing, check in at least once everyday
I am surprised as the sudden change of tone from siman but I love the mature way you defused the tension
You truly are a cool, mature head

Any other reaction from you could have led to an unnecessary escalation and worse, thread hijacking

Also i like the way you gave missblanche practical ideas on how to look more matured than her countenance seems to make her look
Good one

I am still waiting for responses for my questions asked earlier thats why i did not really say anything thus far

biolabee: Sorry i joined late
I have some comments for the ladies on the thread as it seems you are all intelligent beautiful women who are trying to build successful careers for yourself

1. I agree that single ladies have challenges with trying to express themselves, any normal thing is seen as being ostentatious
If you are in ROme, live like Romans
How many guys will approach a lady who just bought a 7m cha cha RAV4


2. This your definition of a rich man sounds philospohical, can you break it down
A single friend of mine who has a house bought and fully paid for in Ajah still does not see himself as rich
He uses an SUV also (new)

Is he rich?

Or what is the same guy is renting only? is he rich




3. Do the ladies on this thread have anything against polygamy if monogamy does not work out

^^^,I guess this is the question right?I thought I answered mine o,so i don't know what you want me to say again .Maybe I answered it wrongly cos I did not understand it perfectly or maybe you didn't understand my reply. lol

Okay can you please rephrase it and come again?,You will get your answers this time.We have new members too,that would answer you and also benefit from your question.

Thanks for your comments all the same,I appreciate.