2buff:

This is Nigerian thinking. You better hope you STAY in Nigerian then and not leave.
That is why Nigerian homes breakup here, unless you don't want her to work. But if she has to work, do ALL that, and sex you on top in this part of the world....You suppose pity am naw.

abi o....They should get slaves as their wives then!
Men drop the ego, and act like humans for once! You dnt or cant xpect ur wife to goto work and also handle d entire chores in d home all by her self...thats slavery mehn! We are humans as well ok? You should learn to assist once in a while!
Cause by d time she starts looking old nd ugly due to stress, then u would start giving stupid nd annoyn reasons for cheating on her wid someone much younger nd goodlooking.

busolayemi: @ Kingwax...ur jst sum annoyin nd disgustin piece of trash who's needs to b noticed...nd yes, u r noticed so parkwell. Nd ur supporter, well av not yet noticed u o...buh I tink ur followin a saddist...chk out his responses...he rily sound like a saddist. Now, to d issue at hand, I have a very caring husband who knos we both work n so knos well dat I nid d help. Wat I dnt get is, if u actually love a woman like u claim to, y allow n watch er crush unda d stress of housechores in d name of bein d head of d family....wats rong in helping er out on sum of dem Forget foreign n africa culture....we r al human...little wonda sum women looks like trash in 2yrs of marriage...is it easy ni? To takia of children, d home, d kitchen nd den a grown up man....I love ma man...God bless u for me....I dnt pray a memba of ma family fall victim of a man like kingmax...nd am so suo d idiot is an igbo man...dey c their wives as properties anyway....if u aint..den I tink u deserve an xplanatn frm ur mom...cos dat blood flows in u

Reallyyyy so Igbos are like dat? :/

lindiwey: @ifIHearAm..there is no big deal bro dts y understandn is key in evry relationship..dt chic dt tld u to wash her plate is a diff case cos dt was rude.am not talkn about a controlling wife or galfrend here.so wt if ur wife dt hs bn so busy all day nw pleads wit u witout bn rude to assist her wit one or two things,wat will b ur reactn? Is it dt u can't assist because of ur ego? Where is d love na?

The love is in the man working realy hard, making enough doh and thereby perform his manly duties which includes PROVISION. With money made, he'll get you a house help to do the chores, instead of him.

Michky: The love is in the man working realy hard, making enough doh and thereby perform his manly duties which includes PROVISION. With money made, he'll get you a house help to do the chores, instead of him.

I would rather have my husband more at home and have less money, than him working his a*s off and not having much time with his family.

JallowBah:

I would rather have my husband more at home and have less money, than him working his a*s off and not having much time with his family.

In other words, you prefer to be poor and loved as opposed to being rich and unloved. right?

Michky: In other words, you prefer poverty to love. Interesting.

No, I prefer love over money.

The money the man makes to be able to pay a maid..why not spend those hours with the family instead?

I would rather have less money, than less time with my husband.

JallowBah:

No, I prefer love over money.

The money the man makes to be able to pay a maid..why not spend those hours with the family instead?

I would rather have less money, than less time with my husband.

I made a mistake earlier. So, you prefer an available and poor husband to an unavailable but wealthy husband. Am i right?

busolayemi: @ Kingwax...ur jst sum annoyin nd disgustin piece of trash who's needs to b noticed...nd yes, u r noticed so parkwell. Nd ur supporter, well av not yet noticed u o...buh I tink ur followin a saddist...chk out his responses...he rily sound like a saddist. Now, to d issue at hand, I have a very caring husband who knos we both work n so knos well dat I nid d help. Wat I dnt get is, if u actually love a woman like u claim to, y allow n watch er crush unda d stress of housechores in d name of bein d head of d family....wats rong in helping er out on sum of dem Forget foreign n africa culture....we r al human...little wonda sum women looks like trash in 2yrs of marriage...is it easy ni? To takia of children, d home, d kitchen nd den a grown up man....I love ma man...God bless u for me....I dnt pray a memba of ma family fall victim of a man like kingmax...nd am so suo d idiot is an igbo man...dey c their wives as properties anyway....if u aint..den I tink u deserve an xplanatn frm ur mom...cos dat blood flows in u

You this bad wife! stop mentioning a tribe that will have your dirty a*s thrown out by mother-in-laws.

Michky: I made a mistake earlier. So, you prefer an available and poor husband to an unavailable but wealthy husband. Am i right?

Absolutely.

JallowBah:

Absolutely.

JallowBah, first i want to congratulate you that you've met me in your life time. Why am i congratulating you? Simple, what am going to say next will be very beneficial to you if you utilize it accordingly.

Michky: JallowBah, first i want to congratulate you that you've met me in your life time. Why am i congratulation you? Simple, what am going to say next will be very beneficial to you if you utilize it accordingly.

...I am waiting

Becacia_Barbie:
Reallyyyy so Igbos are like dat? :/

Kai! Igbos are not like that at all. It is extremely important in Igbo tradition for a man to make sure his wife looks radiant at all times because the man is judged and weighed based on the looks of his wife.
This explains why wives of Igbo men are always looking so fresh even when the man looks raggety.

when a father inlaw collects 500k for dowry what type of pity does he want you to give his daughter.

JallowBah: He works, I works.
He pays, I pay ( house, food, bills. )
I buy my own beauty-things with my own money, he buys whatever he needs with his money.
I clean, he clean.
I cook, he cook.
I get up with the kid in the night, so does he. ( After breastfeeding stopped.. )

And for me, that is how I want it. I do not wish to go to my husband and ask for money for clothes, shoes, or a coffee for that matter. And I do not wish to put the whole responsibility for bills on him either.

Are you Nigerian?

sage_:

Are you Nigerian?

If you took 2sec to check my profile, you would see the answer yourself.

@Jallowbah. Many women pray for a balance of wealth and husband availability. Sadly, many have to choose these days. We all know how valuable love can be to individual lives. True. But choosing love over money is an absolute mistake. ERROR! I say this because i know much more than a lot about this world we live in. Please don't ever again wish for love in place of wealth.

Back to the topic. We all remember the stories in the bible that had slaves in it. Don't we? In the homes of wealthy families, slaves did the chores. Not the Kings! Not the Noble Men! Yes, things are changing these days but take it or leave it, slavery is not gone. Its only been modernized. Now, will it be wrong to utilize the service of a slave to do these dirty things instead of we the busy hard working men?

Think! Think!!

Michky: @Jallowbah. Many women pray for a balance of wealth and husband availability. Sadly, many have to choose these days. We all know how valuable love can be to individual lives. True. But choosing love over money is an absolute mistake. ERROR! I say this because i know much more than a lot about this world we live in. Please don't ever again wish for love in place of wealth.
Think! Think!!

I already chose love over money, and have not regretted one, single day since. I can work and make money as well, you know. As long as we have food on the table, roof over our heads, and are still able to help his family when needed..I am happy.

Yes, things would be easier with more money, of course. But I have also had my husband working his a*s off, and almost not being home, and I see what I prefer.

repogirl: There really shouldnt be anything like partitioning, a true loving couple that wants their union to be solid should communicate. What works for A doesn't work for B because we all of different upbringing and beliefs. Single Ladies and guys, know your partner well before you marry, know the type of person your spouse is before marriage so you will decide whether you can cope or not. A man who loves his wife should be able to compromise and do some things for the wife while a good wife will do same for her husband. Lets all just be fair to our spouses. If unfortunately you feel your spouse is putting too much burden on you and you've said your own but nothing changes, do the best you can do and leave the rest for God, just do your own best.
And this tribal issue tat keeps coming up pisses me off. Theres nothing like yoruba men are more caring or ibo men are proud, its all about upbringing and a persons personal values.
Lets stop hating on each other abeg. I'm Yoruba, married to an ibo man who helps out when he can while my Yoruba dad is d epitome of pride and will not lift up a pin or prepare a meal to save his own life but my mom understands his kind of person and has adjusted. Me, I knew I couldnt manage with such an attitude and I tank God I'm blessed with the kind of person I wanted.He's not perfect but he does the one he can do, I do the rest. Its all about communication and understanding.
Remember a woman is just a help meet, she can only do so much to assist.

superb..i believe d world needs virtueous women as u who undastand d power & strenght of a woman..ur marriage is already blessed! God bless U!

loswhite: so r u insinuating dat Nigerian mentality is poor. D last time I check d ppl wit better mentality as u claimed hav more broken home than ours. @ op u r not yet married n u lookin 4 ways to share domestic duty wit ur husband to be.well u can start wit a roaster for morning duty

My response...

2buff:

There are more broken homes in the west because of their individualistic culture (among other things) and NOT because a loving husband chooses to help his appreciative wife around the house. By your flawed logic you are asserting that:

If a Nigerian man helps with chores, the home will be broken.

I'll give you a moment to process that...

....

....

....

Now tell me, if you are to think like a mature, rational adult, wouldn't you agree that this is just a pointless excuse borne from nothing but pure laziness, irrationality and a clear lack of the human trait of empathy (a feeling you should AT LEAST have for woman you claim to love even if you are a right bastid to everyone else)?
If a woman despises building the family with you to the point she starts "sticking it to your face" when she finally gets free, before getting all riled up, don't you think you oughta also pull back and analyse the situation objectively to be sure YOU are not also the cause of the development?

Marriage should be a joy. It can only be that way for her if you both help and work as a team. If she stays home then it's understandable , but if you are BOTH working, you should help her.
Even if you want to look at it traditionally, by her working, she is already helping your ungrateful azz!

JallowBah:

I already chose love over money, and have not regretted one, single day since. I can work and make money as well, you know. As long as we have food on the table, roof over our heads, and are still able to help his family when needed..I am happy.

Yes, things would be easier with more money, of course. But I have also had my husband working his a*s off, and almost not being home, and I see what I prefer.

Good for you, if that's what suits you. I have only said what i had to say. Its left for you to do what makes you comfy. After all, life is too short to live it wealthy but unhappy. Best of luck to you again.

I rest my case here.

#1Voiceinamillion#

Michky: Good for you, if that's what suits you. I have only said what i had to say. Its left for you to do what makes you comfy. After all, life is too short to live it wealthy but unhappy. Last word, guard your love with everything you've got. Best of luck to you again.

I rest my case here.

#1Voiceinamillion#

Trust me, I already do, and thank you for the input. Many people are naive, and think that love is ALL you need

Michky: @Jallowbah. Many women pray for a balance of wealth and husband availability. Sadly, many have to choose these days. We all know how valuable love can be to individual lives. True. But choosing love over money is an absolute mistake. ERROR! I say this because i know much more than a lot about this world we live in. Please don't ever again wish for love in place of wealth.

Back to the topic. We all remember the stories in the bible that had slaves in it. Don't we? In the homes of wealthy families, slaves did the chores. Not the Kings! Not the Noble Men! Yes, things are changing these days but take it or leave it, slavery is not gone. Its only been modernized. Now, will it be wrong to utilize the service of a slave to do these dirty things instead of we the busy hard working men?

Think! Think!!

See bros talking like every breathing hour of his day he is netting $2000/hr.
Mtchewww. If you are, then ofcourse your wife need not work. She can stay home and run things or you can hire a maid (aalways better that parents raise children though).
But if whether you go to work or not you still bring the same thing back home a la Salary and it's not enough for her to stay at and run the home(meaning she has to work to add more money to the pot), O boy, respect the situation (i.e. get your head out your azz) and handle some things around the house as you are able.

Omo Gone are the days of you must do this, I must do that. This life has changed...
These days we have heavy girls rocking masters/PHD in oil and gas/chem engineering pulling in $300k per annum.
With that sort of income, if you are not pulling in the same, will you tell her to quit just so you both can live off your small $50k all in a childish immature bid to cater to your terribly low self esteem?

I guess it starts with knowing who your partner is. If she is the type to dis her husband if she earns more, then there are things to discuss.
And frankly, such discussions should have already taken place BEFORE marriage.

2buff:

There are more broken homes in the west because of their individualistic culture (among other things) and NOT because a loving husband chooses to help his appreciative wife around the house. By your flawed logic you are asserting that:

If a Nigerian man helps with chores, the home will be broken.

I'll give you a moment to process that...

....

....

....

Now tell me, if you are to think like a mature, rational adult, wouldn't you agree that this is just a pointless excuse borne from nothing but pure laziness, irrationality and a clear lack of the human trait of empathy (a feeling you should AT LEAST have for woman you claim to love even if you are a right bastid to everyone else)?
If a woman despises building the family with you to the point she starts "sticking it to your face" when she finally gets free, before getting all riled up, don't you think you oughta also pull back and analyse the situation objectively to be sure YOU are not also the cause of the development?

Marriage should be a joy. It can only be that way for her if you both help and work as a team. If she stays home then it's understandable , but if you are BOTH working, you should help her.
Even if you want to look at it traditionally, by her working, she is already helping your ungrateful azz!

I guess you read my post upside down because I never mentioned in any manner that women or wives shouldn't be given the necessary attention ,care even as it concerns doing chores at home as a man....I specifically mentioned abt your flawed argument on how Nigerian couples abroad and Nigerians in general are having a higher rate of divorce compared to their white/other nationals which everyone can agree with me that your argument is totally flawed and can only be accepted by a brainwashed dude that sees everything abt his own people as being inferior which is exactly what you are.....may I also remind you that there are some chores at home that women aren't suppose to do because of the physical energy required to accomplish such task and vice versa men too aren't suppose to engage in some task at home because they'll end up messing up everything because they weren't well groomed to handle the intricacies of such tasks.

Truckpusher: I guess you read my post upside down because I never mentioned in any manner that women or wives shouldn't be given the necessary attention ,care even as it concerns doing chores at home as a man....I specifically mentioned abt your flawed argument on how Nigerian couples abroad and Nigerians in general are having a higher rate of divorce [size=18pt]compared to their white/other nationals[/size] which everyone can agree with me that your argument is totally flawed and can only be accepted by a brainwashed dude that sees everything abt his own people as being inferior which is exactly what you are.....may I also remind you that there are some chores at home that women aren't suppose to do because of the physical energy required to accomplish such task and vice versa men too aren't suppose to engage in some task at home because they'll end up messing up everything because they weren't well groomed to handle the intricacies of such tasks.

And where did you see me make this argument?
You simply created that argument yourself and have decided to try to use it as a cross-counter to avail yourself from facing the true argument of why you wouldn't help your wife at home because you know the response to the real argument is "I am a lazy bum".

A time is coming when women will seek husbands but wont see due to this feminism craze. Real men don't bend for shit. I believe its called sambo in Swedish whereby a man and woman play husband and wife but not recognized by the law. Although they become recognized after 10yrs of being together. Women dont forget lionesses takes care of their cubs alone and the Lions do nothing. You're driving men to that point. When that point comes you'll crave a loving man but you'll see non. Only hit and run men. I believe the new term is called 'baby mamas'. Winch wan chop broomstick think say na chewing stick. Mtchewwwwwwww.

sleekman: A time is coming when women will seek husbands but wont see due to this feminism craze. Real men don't bend for shit. I believe its called sambo in Swedish whereby a man and woman play husband and wife but not recognized by the law. Although they become recognized after 10yrs of being together. Women dont forget lionesses takes care of their cubs alone and the Lions do nothing. You're driving men to that point. When that point comes you'll crave a loving man but you'll see non. Only hit and run men. I believe the new term is called 'baby mamas'. Winch wan chop broomstick think say na chewing stick. Mtchewwwwwwww.

Many people all over the world live together without being married, it is called "samboere". It is, after one year of living togeter, recognized by the law that they f.ex have to take care of each other financially.

JallowBah:

I already chose love over money, and have not regretted one, single day since. I can work and make money as well, you know. As long as we have food on the table, roof over our heads, and are still able to help his family when needed..I am happy.

Yes, things would be easier with more money, of course. But I have also had my husband working his a*s off, and almost not being home, and I see what I prefer.

Because one mumu kiwi polish is shining your ur white kitten wanting to kollect kpali now makes you a master and think tank on 9ja affairs? Hmmm *singing Femi Kuti*I sorry sorry O...

sleekman:

Because one mumu kiwi polish is shining your ur white kitten wanting to kollect kpali now makes you a master and think tank on 9ja affairs? Hmmm *singing Femi Kuti*I sorry sorry O...

Lol. Oh, so because I am oyinbo I can have no matter in any discussions in here? Bullsh*t

2buff:

And where did you see me make this argument?
You simply created that argument yourself and have decided to try to use it as a cross-counter to avail yourself from facing the true argument of why you wouldn't help your wife at home because you know the response to the real argument is "I am a lazy bum".

I'm not married yet and when I finally settle down I'll definitely get a maid for my wife because I don't expect my wife to clean up the big house ...even as a single guy I still have a maid because I wouldn't want my sisters to spend the whole day cleaning up because they have their own schedule and their own life, but again I wouldn't want my maid changing simple faulty electrical appliances, mow my lawn trim the flowers or repair minor toilet facilities.....get me very clear my internet perfect fellow if I get married someday my wife wouldn't have to work her azz off for us to survive , she can own something that will fetch her some good money because when the kids starts coming I want somebody that has the same stake in my life to be there all the time and do her job....one more point I'm not a lazy bum besides from your pix that I've seen before you're fat and that's an obvious sign of a lazy bum.

JallowBah:

Lol. Oh, so because I am oyinbo I can have no matter in any discussions in here? Bullsh*t

You can contribute and if peeps like the fellow above resorts to insult I suggest you pay them back in their own coin...badmouth no get colour oh.

JallowBah:

Lol. Oh, so because I am oyinbo I can have no matter in any discussions in here? Bullsh*t

Who said that? No way I didn't. Infact I used to have a white babe and she knew d African way. She was/is way better than our 9ja babes but dont come here with that western bullshit. You love kiwi polish lions don't you? I'm sure u know the difference btw a kiwi lion and a domesticated cat

Truckpusher: I'm not married yet and when I finally settle down I'll definitely get a maid for my wife because I don't expect my wife to clean up the big house ...even as a single guy I still have a maid because I wouldn't want my sisters to spend the whole day cleaning up because they have their own schedule and their own life, but again I wouldn't want my maid changing simple faulty electrical appliances, mow my lawn trim the flowers or repair minor toilet facilities.....get me very clear my internet perfect fellow if I get married someday my wife wouldn't have to work her azz off for us to survive , she can own something that will fetch her some good money because when the kids starts coming I want somebody that has the same stake in my life to be there all the time and do her job....one more point I'm not a lazy bum besides from your pix that I've seen before you're fat and that's an obvious sign of a lazy bum.

So why have you malignantly decided to hound this issue out for this long?
Has the bulk of my argument not been IF YOU BOTH WORK, HELP OUT? Stay on one side of the post and stop jumping about.

The truth is the very thought of you doing things in your matrimonial home has such an irksome effect on you that your immediate reflex reaction is to counter and renounce it hands-down without even applying any fore-thought or analyzing the promptings towards why the notion was maade. Most qualified Psychologists call this phenomenon "Laziness".