kanayo74:

I keep on wondering whats the duty of a woman in marriage?
you marry a wife who does virtally notyhing at home,
she cant wash the bed sheet both of u sleep,
she cant cook
she doesnt wash your clothes and so on
when u coplain you u become the nagging husband.

so please nairalanders WHAT ACTUALLY IS THE DUTY OF A WOMAN IN MARRIAGE

kanayo74:

I keep on wondering whats the duty of a woman in marriage?
you marry a wife who does virtally notyhing at home,
she cant wash the bed sheet both of u sleep,
she cant cook
she doesnt wash your clothes and so on
when u coplain you u become the nagging husband.

so please nairalanders WHAT ACTUALLY IS THE DUTY OF A WOMAN IN MARRIAGE

JJYOU:

it always depends on why you married in the first place.

who was washing your clothes and cooking your food before you married?

kanayo74:

chaircover
does early stage of pregnancy make a woman lazy?
if she is lazy with work will she still be lazy to call or explain issues to you?
i know pregnancy could be quite disturbing ,but it doesn't mean the person pregnant should use that as an excuse or what do u feel?
please educate me more?
i feel it will be better to play along and let the guy do his things himself, and do what ever he likes and she shouldn't complain because what goes around comes around.

ilelobola.
Ur cousin or aunt can be married for 14 years with out domestic disputes that doesn't mean all is well.
if your cousin likes cooking doesn't mean the woman should not know her duty.
she should be there to compliment the man.
or what do u feel?

kanayo74:

responsibility a nice question u asked "that who was washing and cooking for the person?
if we go by what u said, some one was taking care of her too before she married, then the man has no responsblity towards her.

TreeTop
u agreed with what JJYOU said then food for thought for u,
if any one was responsible for an action before marriage he or she should continue after marriage
so encourage people you know not to help as they marry

kanayo74:

treetop
if u step up your game cos she is pregnant there is nothing wrong with that.
stepping up your game doesn't mean that you should become her slave and she being pregnant Si not a ticket to laziness.
in a case you do almost every thing and come back from work and there is no food for you to eat all because she is pregnant, i guess to you that's nice?
so to step up your game u go into the kitchen immediately and start cooking cos u want t o still step up your game, that's crap
pregnant women still go to farm u know?

she shouldn't over work her self cos she is pregnant but that does not mean she she be lazy and take u for granted.

kanayo74:

treetop
if u step up your game cos she is pregnant there is nothing wrong with that.
stepping up your game doesn't mean that you should become her slave and she being pregnant Si not a ticket to laziness.
in a case you do almost every thing and come back from work and there is no food for you to eat all because she is pregnant, i guess to you that's nice?
so to step up your game u go into the kitchen immediately and start cookin cos u want t o still step up your game, that's crap
pregnant women still go to farm u know?

she shouldn't over work her self cos she is pregnant but that does not mean she she be lazy and take u for granted.

kanayo74:

ilelobola
steppping up is ideal, but not for one party AL0NE
for u to step you have to be encouraged.
not being able to lift a hand bag when u where pregnant should also imply that u could not call when u were pregnant.
pregnancy might be very difficult and uneasy for the person carrying it but it should not be a REASON for LAZINESS and IDLING away.
let suppose it was the other way round the guy could not provide food while she is pregnant, i iknow HEAVEN will be let LOSE.
Now the case willnot be preperation but she can cook but no food.

Think about it.

Ilelobola:

Well, I said my right hand not both hands.

If she wasn’t doing all these things before she got pregnant i.e. not working and not doing all the chores you’ve listed, then you wife might be lazy. However, why did you marry her as you should have known beforehand? Hence just hold on to the reason you married her and deal with it.

Otherwise, if she was doing all these things before and has only stopped since being pregnant, STEP UP and stop moaning, eat takeaways together and don’t stress the woman.

If a man can genuinely not provide food for her whilst pregnant due to circumstances he can’t control, who is going to let hell loose as long as the man is not being lazy.

No office based 9-5 work can compare with pregnancy especially in the first few weeks/months and for some unfortunate women, the whole 9 months. She might get pregnant again and feel totally different perhaps even more energetic.

Again, I agree with Treetop, talk to her.

If[b] only God had made it possible for men to experience pregnancy too.

We live in the UK with no house helps an my darling husband used to wake up every morning cook me my pregnancy craving of yam & egg and brought it to me in bed and when he got back in the evening used to cook me amala and okro plus a different meal for himself because understandably he didn’t want to eat amala everyday. I was bed bound and couldn’t do anything for those months.

I used to feel really bad for my husband but he never once complained and would even wake me up to tell me he had run my bath etc. Nothing was too much for him and the pregnancy certainly brought us closer.

chaircover:

Kanayo74 Congratulations and thank you for confirming my suspicion which is that your wife may be pregnant.

I do honestly understand how you must be feeling; after a hard days work, battling with go slow etc you come back to an untidy house and with no meal on the table and so on.

I however want you to please take a step back and try to understand that pregnancy is a gift from God and women react differently. Some women don’t even know they are pregnant for months while some are sick from conception.

I am one of these “special” women who throw up from the day they miss their period until a few days after the birth. I don’t need a pregnancy test to tell me if I am pregnant or not. With my last pregnancy I was admitted in hospital for a few days each time on 5 different occasions to be rehydrated with drips because I couldn’t keep anything down.

We live in the UK with no house helps an my darling husband used to wake up every morning cook me my pregnancy craving of yam & egg and brought it to me in bed and when he got back in the evening used to cook me amala and okro plus a different meal for himself because understandably he didn’t want to eat amala everyday. I was bed bound and couldn’t do anything for those months.

I used to feel really bad for my husband but he never once complained and would even wake me up to tell me he had run my bath etc. Nothing was too much for him and the pregnancy certainly brought us closer.

Why am I sharing all this with you – because I know it’s just a phase and as soon as she has the baby she will be fine again. Please make the best out of this period, get close to your wife, she is not deliberately being lazy she is probably just exhausted.

Remember, you are now her father, friend, brother & husband and if she were still in her father’s home, I am sure that she won’t be expected to do anything in her present condition.

Is there anyway you can get someone to help with the chores, a cousin, family member or even a housemaid up until the baby is born. They don’t have to live with you; they can come every other day or come in the morning and leave in the evening etc.

I tell you a secret though; after the way my husband treated me when I was pregnant there is very little wrong he can now do in my eyes. Anytime he offends me and I get angry, I remember how well he treats me and how much he loves me and the anger just dissolves.

I am sure you love your wife, please help her through this difficult time. It is rewarding I promise you.

Good Luck

Seun:

A woman's duty is whatever the [b]husband and wife agreed upon [/b]when planning to get married.