you do it with another man when he is not with you, he forgives
you do with another man when he is now with you , he for gives but cant forget
why because what guarantee will he have that you will not do it with another man again?

THAT IS WHY MEN HATES IT WHEN THEIR WOMEN DO IT WITH ANOTHER MAN
IF A MAN DON DO IT WITH A WOMAN, HE CAN DO IT WITH HER AGAIN AND AGAIN!
once debe is debe forever

@ bee goodd,

i feel your pain, 101% of guys will hardly understand, i was having such issues with my ex at a time but i learnt to trust her in whatever she told me cos if she never told me chances are that i may never know, you did what was right but i guess you cant change things now, he definitely sees you differently just carry on with your life.In the future,before ever you say anything sensitive to anyone be sure the individual has the heart to accomodate it.

all the best.

@ poster ! I love u and ur courage to be truthful even when u know u most likely would be treated this way ! This is the type of truthfulness i love displayed !

No matter what people might say, u have done the right thing and thats a fact ! U shall be rewarded and that is not negotiable !
Most people will commit an even bigger sin and seek forgiveness but, would act differently when some has just a smaller sin compared to theirs !

My dear, move on . He doesnt deserve u. A better man will come your way that will totally love and appreciate your truthfulness ! The only thing u have to worry about is you ! Focus ur life on positive things and it shall be well with u.

u are indeed very special. be cool,GOOD and KEEP being GREAT
I wish u the very best of luck.
cheers a

@poster,
I must really commend your strength for going all the way to confess your sins, this is very hard and i pray i could have your type of Spirit. Thats very wonderful of you. One thing i would love to say is that your b/f might not go well with you, but surely you have won a place in God's heart because you are doing the exact thing He wants. Remember that the devil cant love you and God will also love, its impossible!
My advice: go back to God who inspired you to confess your sins and believe that He is the only one you have offended, and as a son to Him, He should give you back the joy you used to have in your relationship or better still give you a better guy, afterall He has all you need to be happy.
I wish you well.

@poster

One of the many hazards of this "born again", stop and go, "phock and repent" syndrome is that people tend to "talk" too much.  There are some things you keep to yourself and confess to "God" only. I am sure your "wait and take" boyfriend abi na fiance had his own secrets and did not even bother bringing them up.  Have you ever read "Tess of the Durbervilles"?  Just like many other literature books to be read, including the bible. . . .there are many lessons to be learned if only people will pay attention to history!  A man will ALWAYS reject you in a heart beat for the same sins he has committed. Only a fool makes some terrible mistakes that you know will definitely backfire up your arse!

Well, you have confessed to God and Man to show how spiritual you are.  Now go back and lay on your bed and stay strong in the "Lord" of loneliness.  I am happy he had the courage to kiss you and say goodbye. This kind of behaviour you exhibited here would turn me off too.  Instead of working on your relationship as a human being. . . you have decided to approach it like a spiritual being "IN A PHYSICAL WORLD" for that matter? When the next one comes along. . . confess more things to him.  If you run out. . . .make up some more till you obtain the "Holy Grail"!

Better luck next time.  Just shut your mouth like he did and work on the most important things in your relationship. . .  no one really cares to know what you have done in the past.  Your ability to stay focused in the present tells your worth. . . not what you did in the past.

Please learn a lesson from this!

Clicking ma tongue in the usual "South African fashion"

_"CLUCK"!

baby girl I really commend your spirit to come out openly in which no guy or lady could take such a bold step. As for me I will advice you to go on with your life if it is God will for you guys to be together he will definitely come back to you. It is better to have a broken relationship than a broken marriage.

You chose between him and God and need not weep. Move on as if nothing happened. Afterall, it was a convenant well kept!

I'm very disappointed by the fake comments all you men on this site are making. Are you all actually praising this girl for doing wrong? i mean i know no one is perfect but for God sakes, if you were in her fiancee's shoes would you be praising her for comming forward with the confession when it shouldn't have happened to begin with.


shaking my head in disappointment

before you get so dissapointed i would appreciate if you put yourself in her shoes, mind you during the period her ex- and her were in recess, emotions had grown btw her and the school guy, while not justifying the act, what she did was right despite it backfired.

aisha2:

From my experience with men, never confess to cheating, I had a boyfreind when i was in school, we went on a long strike, when we came back he confessed that he slept with a chick, i forgave him but me feeling like it was confession time, confessed that i kissed another guy, and that was it oh, he never kissed me again, saying he my mouth has been defiled.

Sounds like you dated an immature slowpoke. Good riddence to bad rubbish in your case.

Lmao AJ. I agree but Im still waitiong for the OP to answer my question

Good thing you confessed!
Nothing done in the past is hidden
You would have had a DIVORCE registered against your name if you kept quiet and that is even worse!
And guess what? God has probably just given you a sign that your ex-fiance was perhaps not the one for you because if he was maybe he would stay

To all of you ladies wearing engagement rings and raving my fiance this! my fiance that!!-Be careful, only God knows best!

@Poster
It is very sad the way things ended but you have gotta be strong and move on,

@All
Relationships is just long thing i swear, i can get my head round the hassles at times!

Most of them arent even wearing rings, that;'s the embarrassing part

@poster

Bless your heart for the step you took in confessing your past to him and i wish you a happy life even though he does not come back to you. How many can do that? Who knows what he did during the interval? Nobody holy pass.

D-reloaded:

Lmao AJ. I agree but I'm still waitiong for the OP to answer my question

I really just don't understand people.  You have been blessed with a relationship to work on.  The next thing to prove that you are holy is to open your mouth and start confessing what no one asked you. In Nigeria for that matter?    I don't know if it is out of joblessness or just plain stupidity. I say if I am the guy, I would definitely do the same.  Like every one is interested in all that fake spiritual crap!  

This is the kind of woman you will marry and keep in the house and while you are at work she will sneak out of the house to go and be confessing and shagging one priest or the other. . .never minding her damn business. Always with a guilty conscience.  If she can't find one in the neighbourhood, she sure will be motivated enough to find one on "My Space"! She has not minded the earthly business and no way on earth, heaven or hell can mind the spiritual one either. What a loser!


There are some things God would have to come down and ask me himself before I ever breathe them to any other soul including myself.  Rubbish!  To impress who?  A fellow human being like myself who is probably living a life worse than mine till he or she is caught?

It just shows she has a lose tongue and cannot be trusted. I hope she learns! Of course she cannot answer your question.  Like she is the only one who has fallen from grace to grass and risen from grass to grace.

I have said it many times. . .this hypocrisy coupled with busy bodism can only lead to disaster.  Now she is calling the guy.  I will never pick her calls.  Let her go and try her luck with another born again so they can both be confessing to each other and see if she still does not get dumped even after the born again man has impregnated his whole village on top of all his confessions.


The most disgusting part of all this is that no true "born again" will be lamenting over some "born-again" or "pagan" dude who has dissed her for her faith and convictions. Abi true born agains deey phock?    No shiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiit! The fact that she is still pursuing him with phone calls about tells you what kind of a "born again" she is. 

The worst of all kinds-----PHOCK AND REPENT all the way to Jerusalem and back!  Frankly, if you ask me she missing the "phocking" part nothing else.  Let her close her wide legs for a change and concentrate on things solely of the spirit for a change and stop phocking around. . . this game is getting way too old, especially on this our Nairaland!  One guy might just show up an believe all these here shakespearean acts of crocodile tears!  I would run far away as a guy!

For those who are saying she is brave to confess. . .I hope you too will go and confess all your indiscretions to your partners!   HYPOCRITES! These are the ones too busy listening to gossips and other peoples problems like their lives depended on it. Wait for me to confess to you guys too! Busy bodies!

PLEASE[b] REAL BORN AGAINS DO NOT PHOCK [/b] OR HAVE PERIODS OF CHEAP LAPSES IN THEIR CHARACTERS !!!! THIS IS JUST TOO CHEAP!!!

Bullshit!

Very annoying!

This is just too much almondjoy, the Lady in question only poured out her heart to the house for advise and all you could do is crusify her? Thats really not fare.

With people like you, one would not need an enemy.

@ poster.

The deed has been done and there is nothing anyone can do about it. All i expect you to do now is focus your mind on things that are more important and upbuilding.

Make good use of your time while u still have them and think less of this your so-called Righteous boy find.

@Bee goodd
I'd say you understood your own self enough to let out the truth of the 'extra' u had during the course of your 'reunited' rlationship. It takes good conscience and fear of God to be able to do that, though I'm not praising your 'f*ck-up'. A lot of people won't be able to. I bet your guy must have had his own but he isn't telling. The natural feeling for the guy is disgust toward you. But like all the other peeps have advised, he'll get over the hurt and if he really loves you, he''ll come back to you. The fact that you told him should show to him how committed and truthful you are (pls don't get me wrong, I'm not in support of double dating or 'extra' affairs). I want to assure you that it would have been worse if he got to hear of it from a third party (assuming you were married and he learns of it, it could be catastophic). A lot of counselors would advise you don't say a word of it to him, but I tell u it would be worse if the story got to him from an outside source. It's a different ballgame if u had the extras[b] before you hooked back up[/b], then there won't be feelings of guilt.
So, i would advise you try (though it won't be easy) to let go and concentrate on your studies and life. If he was ever meant to be for you, he'll forgive you and reconcile with you.

angelq:

This is just too much almondjoy, the Lady in question only poured out her heart to the house for advise and all you could do is crusify her? Thats really not fare.

With people like you, one would not need an enemy.

Hmmmmmmmmmm!  Thank you.  Because I am telling her the truth?  Like I said, thank you for keeping your insults to the barest minimum.  Let her come and defend herself please.  This is how you guys start.  Rather than address the poster, you start attacking almondjoy for stripping your conscience naked!  Please address the poster abeg.  When I decide to engage in this so called born again phock and repent game of Lucifer. . I promise you I will come to Nairaland with[b] Creflo Adeboye "Money Doubler" Dollar [/b] and Eddie "Chike" Long John Silver Anus  massaging one of each of ma breasts to confess on Nairaland!

D-reloaded:

Sounds like you dated an immature slowpoke. Good riddence to bad rubbish in your case.

For where?  Meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee? ALL MEN are like that! Confess to a man?  God forbid! Let him confess to me! I will still not confess to him under any circumstances.  All he gets from me is a nod like a lizard and a smile like a sheep if he is lucky! I just pretend he is not even talking to me.  If you tell a man anything about you. . . all it takes it the right time.  He will definitely use it against you. . .born again or dead again. . .guaranteed.  A Nigerian man for that matter when im mouth no dey close even for im sleep? His whole village will here about the matter!  I say go and read "The Tess Of The Durbervilles" again if most of you have forgotten.  That was how I learned ma lesson. . .as a child!  Most of you are still making mistakes adults should not even dream about to please a fellow human being like you!  What is the purpose of education if you cannot learn what history has proven time and time again? I am not that daft sorry!

Over ma dead body I say!   If im like make im hear for outside.  All I would say is "no comment"! Case closed!

Rubbish!

pls stop calling him and concentrate on your exams.
if he loves u, he will come for u.
wipe ur tears, it is not the end of the world.
cheers

People hate hearing the truth. They would rather listen to lies. I'll rather listen to the truth u have to tell me than find out elsewhere. Over time i've learned to appreciate the truth as it comes. Then i'm left with the choice to make.

@ Poster i appreciate ur gesture in confessing it was good enough (altho not quite impressed by what u did). If he's not urs u'll find ur man soon. And i'll advise u to stop calling, let him know ur worth.

baby, nobody s perfect. if youve been struggling with sex 4 a long time as u say then u shld have made him realise ur weakness! no man is going to stay with a woman he cant trust, never! u shuld have told him when u guys were statrting ur relatonship, i have a problem with sex and i need help, then u guys will work things out together, thts what a relatonship is. im a guy and im just coming out of a relatonship, i know how hard it was 4 me not to cheat on her cos there were willing p.ssies right left and centre, All men have a problem with sex!!! so 4 a woman to come to me and tell me after shes cheated tht she has a problem is just not good enuff,

Like she has done what no man or woman has done on this earth or planet before?


BIG DEAL!

Long Hisssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss!

Confessions of a Taxi driver or a Travelling salesman will even have better effect on me than this fake over played case study!  Not an Oscar quality at all!

Very un-entertained!

@poster
Now the truth has set you freeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee like some have chanted here. Go and enjoy your lonely bed with no one to "phock" but yourself! Get you a good vibrator/Love Machine or whatever they call those things. Or use the cucumber in your "Fridgidaire"!

You can't have your cake and eat it too.  Life does not work like that baby!  Next time think with your head!  Never allow a good phock to make you start confessing things you should never open your mouth to say especially when you are not asked. Or are you drunk or drugged up with passion for a pre-hypnotic study in your church?

Please write us something else poster! Not impressed at all!

You can't get over it easily but with time you will. you are a special girl .You admitted what other girls wont admit. your conscience is clear but your boyfriend is gone.

My Dear remember that GOD is a meraciful father so Put your faith in God. If he really your boyfriend belong to you, he will come back, but if he doesnt come back, he never belong to you. its simple as that, Good luck girl.

Like she has done what no man or woman has done on this earth or planet before?

BIG DEAL!

Long Hisssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss!

Confessions of a Taxi driver or a Travelling salesman will even have better effect on me than this fake over played case study!  Not an Oscar quality at all!

Very un-entertained!

@poster
Now the truth has set you freeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee like some have chanted here.  Now enjoy your lonely bed with no  one to "phock"!

You can have your cake and eat it too.  Life does not work like that baby!  Next time think with your head! Never allow a good phock to make you start confessing things you should never open your mouth to say especially when you are not asked.

Please say something else poster! Not impressed at all!

All hail the great Almondjoy.

Believe me babe, you sure need a serious and strong deliverance from God. because at this piont i would not know the most appropraite adjective to qualify your type.

Really wish i can see your face.

jkpretty:

People hate hearing the truth. They would rather listen to lies. I'll rather listen to the truth u have to tell me than find out elsewhere. Over time i've learned to appreciate the truth as it comes. Then i'm left with the choice to make.
@ Poster i appreciate your gesture in confessing it was good enough (altho not quite impressed by what u did). If he's not urs u'll find your man soon. And i'll advise u to stop calling, let him know your worth.

omo, you're 100% correct on that. it's better to let the truth out, before it escapes on its on and cause some real damages. a broken relationship is better than a broken marriage.

@post
but i  understand the guy's anger. just because you told the truth does not mean he should just forgive you easily. what you did was disgusting and utterly disgraceful. omo, once you're with another man, and you cheated him with your ex, be prepare to take the consequence. sorry to say, i seriously hope he does not forgive you. leave the man be and let him find someone better. a cheater will always be a cheater. born again my black a$$. the thing is, if you cheated on your guy with your schoolmate, what makes you think you won't be tempted to do it twice, or thrice or even more time?
LEAVE THE MAN ALONE!! think about who you really love, not who you think you love. if you dnt love your school mate, but you prefer using him for your wants, that's your own wahala. and may your schoolmate do the same in return to you.
if you love your fiance, be prepare to only give yourself to him o. once you cross the path (which you did), consider yourself a cheater and take that to mean you're not really ready to marry your fiance.

BORN AGAIN KO, ROAST AGAIN NI. . . _{6 year relationship and you messed it up? omo, that one na your own wahala.}


All of you that's making the poster seem like an angel here are idiots, see you oh. what if you were  in his situation eh? a guy/girl tells you that she loves you for 6 whole fxuking years and when you're ready to marry him/her,  he/she tells you that she's been cheating on you with him/her schoolmate. WDH? that one na 6 wasteful years jare

@poster,

Stop calling him and move on!

I wonder y u are complaining, u cheated on your boyfriend when u guys were seperated, so y did he break up with you. He has no excuse, he just wanted to end the stuff, he has been looking for a way to end the relationship.
thats what i see from the whole story.

So if i were u, and if age is still on ur side, u had better move on, u will surely find another guy, or another guy will surely find you. God help you. Anyway may be ur repaying for ur sins

madam na you doyourself na you sow wetin you dey reap so why you dey bother allman.wayo dey smell for here men. but like someone says e don happen e don happen be that so yu move on and be a good girl. but if you insist on having him back just keep on trying, dont give up till you are old and grey then the one billion other good fellas wey for give you do no go even look yourside again alas na only the dive off third mainland go welcome you into im cold embrace. come to think about it u could even do that tonight. blisssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss,

angelq:


All hail the great Almondjoy.

Believe me babe, you sure need a serious and strong deliverance from God. because at this piont i would not know the most appropraite adjective to qualify your type.

Really wish i can see your face.

MODERATOR!  MODERATOR!  MODERATOR!

Come and see this one oooooooooooooooooooooooooh!  Infact where is my button! If you type my name again. . . I will report you to the moderator so you can disappear!  This is your last warning!

@ ehie007
shey pe yu saf no fall for the wayo. the wayo dey smell bad. good someone is seeing beyond the ~##&x and talking