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Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Family / Are You Feeling Suicidal? Come Here First! (part 2) (133366 Views)
My Elder Sister Is Feeling Suicidal / Are you feeling angry right now? Let-off steam here! / Are You Feeling Suicidal? Come Here First! (2) (3) (4)
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Re: Are You Feeling Suicidal? Come Here First! (part 2) by Tgirl4real(f): 1:03am On Jul 07, 2013 |
Tge: |
Re: Are You Feeling Suicidal? Come Here First! (part 2) by Gudintent: 3:01am On Jul 07, 2013 |
@Tgirl4real I can still tell the handle that responded with the above write up, you have not completely made his/her handle invincible |
Re: Are You Feeling Suicidal? Come Here First! (part 2) by Les: 8:07pm On Jul 07, 2013 |
I skimmed through this topic and I express my opinion as a once suicidal-thought victim. It all started back then in my junior finalist outta post traumatic effect of betrayal by my friend, though didn't cost me my life but cost my family days of sleeplessness night and hbp to ma lovely dad... well, I'm not saying it won't work for others but all I know is it didn't work for me. I rose in my own terms after my mom gave me the shouting of my life. I might want to hurt myself then but never wanna see those I love, hurt. poco a poco, I came out from my depression starting with the church. Though it took a long time for me to start socializing.. how to help depressed guys::::: simply give them what they want and let them know it is not worth the precious life God gave them. I still feel depressed from time to time... And did I mention that I once took indocid but thankfully it wasn't in a fatal quantity.... effect of my depression:;;: I don't get emotionally attached to people.,.. I know it's a big lie when I tell my gf that I love her but I gata do it for the game.... Don't leave me, Vivian cos you bring out the humanity in me.. 1 Like |
Re: Are You Feeling Suicidal? Come Here First! (part 2) by Cestmoi1(f): 12:42am On Jul 08, 2013 |
greatgod2012: Thanks @op, hopefully, this is going to help.im going thru no 1-7 bt d tot of committing suicide is out of it.once i sense my thinking mood is getting deep and i cry.i jst start praying in my hrt or surf d net or read a book or watch tv or listen to music,dis helps and has helped me alot.slp is out of it cos i practically force myslf to slp and migraine h/ache is my enemy's bestfrnd.may God help us all.amen. 1 Like |
Re: Are You Feeling Suicidal? Come Here First! (part 2) by Nobody: 7:09am On Jul 08, 2013 |
Re: Are You Feeling Suicidal? Come Here First! (part 2) by Cestmoi1(f): 10:30am On Jul 08, 2013 |
chaircover:tnx ma'am.dis is soothing..,xoxo |
Re: Are You Feeling Suicidal? Come Here First! (part 2) by Tgirl4real(f): 11:18am On Jul 08, 2013 |
C'est moi: I have come to realise that life is not about 'up' 'up'. We have a lot of down moments too. One thing that keeps me going is hope. I am not hopeless in this world. I have Christ and I know my future is secured in him. Just like CC pointed out, doing what you love doing helps a lot. For me, it's movies at the cinemas and surfing the net. 2 Likes |
Re: Are You Feeling Suicidal? Come Here First! (part 2) by Cestmoi1(f): 12:47pm On Jul 08, 2013 |
Tgirl4real:lyk criusly,u r ryt too.i rmba i was rily angry within me on friday mrng.i jst switched to oneG channel and afta listening to loyiso bala's jesus to the world,i felt beta.music helps me alot,i listen to al whether it's gospel or secular.It is well wit us.amen. 1 Like |
Re: Are You Feeling Suicidal? Come Here First! (part 2) by Tgirl4real(f): 12:52pm On Jul 08, 2013 |
Les: I skimmed through this topic and I express my opinion as a once suicidal-thought victim. It all started back then in my junior finalist outta post traumatic effect of betrayal by my friend, though didn't cost me my life but cost my family days of sleeplessness night and hbp to ma lovely dad... You can start by loosening up a bit. And don't take things too seriously. |
Re: Are You Feeling Suicidal? Come Here First! (part 2) by bknight: 2:15pm On Jul 08, 2013 |
I was anti-social, a sadist, moody, wasn't confident in social cycles etc. 1. A changing encounter was when I heard d story of ketekete, baba ati omo (the donkey, the man and his son). Ebenezer Obey sang it. I gave it a critical thought. 2. I noticed people who drank beer were less prone to be sadists 3. I realized mundane religious topics had a root in me. 4. I realized how unconciously this behavior built up over years. So, I joined a new church. I made sure it was a church with a pastor who was taught practical ways of living. I noticed d different approach to the same topics, only this time didn't sound mundane. Then I sought to liberate my thinking and boost my mental capacity to get more analytic. I decided to see things from logical angle than making decision based on emotions and sentiments. I played games like sudoku and other mental stimulating games. Then I realized Star beer made me sleep a lot. I made sure to set 200naira aside everyday for a bottle. I'd sit in bars, quietly enjoying d gists. I found out beer bars had a lot of carefree, outgoing extroverts. I wld sit with only one bottle for hours. But there was a subtle effect. I thought less about those things I'd normally hole up in my room thinking. I noted that it was all my 'insecurities' that manifested in different ways. Inferiority complex had to be dealt with. It took me a while to analyze a lot about me. Now, with a clearer, refreshed mind I began to work on myself. Soon, I realized the world was only waiting for mw to take charge! This is but a summary, can't really type much. All these took about 2yrs. I really had to work on myself. Now? Hahahahahaha! I am a better man. I wondered how I would have headed a home (raising a family) being that kind of person I was then. That wld hv been pathetic! Anyways, I hv had to retrace drinking beer at beer bars. I drink in my room now. I now shun social gatherings with pride, not out of depression. I got a basketball kit. Jog in d morning, go to d court later. My aim was to relate more with people in d court esp on saturday mornings. Oh! I forgot to add that I intentionally became a carefree person at a time, in fact did what ppl never saw, expected nor believed me do. Confidence oozes out now. I enjoy good belly laughs now, friends want to hv me around now + I didn't change physique nor do plastic surgery but more female friends now find me attractive. How's that for a change! Let me quickly add that nairaland helped a bit too. I don't think listening to music when u're moody will help in d long run. Yes, it might help u get over it now but are u looking to just overcome an immediate moment of self pity, depression etc or u want a total overhaul? Do more outdoor activities!!! Oh! Yes!!! I intentionally took a job that was strictly marketing. Needless to say I performed less sales but my intentions were different! It was part of my transformation. It made a profound effect! There were couple of other things I did. Even when I craved to listen to mild love songs, I restrained. No slow music! I did more of these useless naija beats. Having a deep knowledge of music, I loathed these naija artist but I was on my mission...I wanted a change! ... And I got a change! 8 Likes |
Re: Are You Feeling Suicidal? Come Here First! (part 2) by Tgirl4real(f): 2:18pm On Jul 08, 2013 |
bknight: I was anti-social, a sadist, moody, wasn't confident in social cycles etc. Good for you. lol Thank God for a positive outcome. |
Re: Are You Feeling Suicidal? Come Here First! (part 2) by bknight: 11:53pm On Jul 08, 2013 |
Thanks! But its nothing really if peeps think less with their emotions and think more logically, as I realized. To overcome depression, self pity etc goes beyond prayer. In fact, I actually prayed less . I don't know anything abt being suicidal though, but the only thing nice abt being an introvert is the word itself. Its a fancy word, but too expensive a life: I just couldn't afford being so. |
Re: Are You Feeling Suicidal? Come Here First! (part 2) by chiboy429(m): 9:24am On Jul 09, 2013 |
The crisis ,continues killing,murder, mismanagement,poverty,and lots of other problems that are facing nigeria ,is as a result of insuficientflow of love .for instance cases of man beating up his wife,is something that is common in our society today and 90 percent of this situation ends up in the killing of one of the patners,before going into matrimony is are couples who proclaim love ,swore an oath to live in love ,peace and harmony but within few years this oath willbe broken ,looking at this problem critically and rationally the causes are linked to poverty inthe family .there are families todaythat the wife is the bread winner,a sad and awful experience was recorded but it was doubted not until i saw it with my own eyes before the one i saw with my own eyes, its a case of women working as labourers in construction sites ,this women.theway these jobs go is frenetic as they raced to meet their daily quota of work .the quantity of jobdone determines how much pay they will receive .carrying head pans served blocks and mortar to masons perched precariously on scaffolds.this women have lost fittings with dirty gowns .looks with a comical sight as they dug,shovelled and served mortar .mostof this women were intervied as was found that ,most have up to 5to 9 children at most ,some sayingthey had up to 15 years of experience.the most shocking oneis the one i saw myself when i gotto a new site ,women climb up to 3 storey casting the decking in uyo akwa ibom state ,this is an odd experience.Our leaders today donot care about the welfare of her citizenry,all they care about is embezzle fund ,keep for their posterity meanwhile people are dieing of malnutrition,diseases,sickness and poverty.Unemployment is a stale news today thats why even new born babies cry excessively when they are born because of the current situation .In another vein ,stories of rape, murder,kidnapping, killing for one purpose or the other ,ritualists seeking for power ,fame ,money engage in the heartless killing of little children for their selfish gain.We are known as people of love in the days of old.but today we have lost it because of lack of fear for the creator and the love of money engaging in one form of immorality or the other just to aquire our wants.source http://enews.com.ng 2 Likes 1 Share |
Re: Are You Feeling Suicidal? Come Here First! (part 2) by baby124: 12:54am On Jul 10, 2013 |
bknight: I was anti-social, a sadist, moody, wasn't confident in social cycles etc. Ebenezer Obey's songs are wonderful and a true depiction of life then and now. It really takes one to good places, that is if you understand Yoruba. Funny he sang a lot of his songs in the 70s. . |
Re: Are You Feeling Suicidal? Come Here First! (part 2) by baby124: 12:56am On Jul 10, 2013 |
bknight: Thanks! But its nothing really if peeps think less with their emotions and think more logically, as I realized. You are either naturally introverted or you are not. I am introverted, and i tell you i have the best time by myself? Funny thing is i can be the life of the party anywhere i am, but all who know me know i am an introvert naturally. I am also the least shy person you will meet. But above all i really really love my own company. . It gives me time to think, plan, and strategize all my moves. 1 Like |
Re: Are You Feeling Suicidal? Come Here First! (part 2) by Roland17(m): 10:17pm On Jul 12, 2013 |
I am soooo proud of everyone who has taken the time to keep this thread alive, many do not understand the burden threads like this take off on people, especially since its an anonymous site where people can read and write without loosing their privacy. 1 Like |
Re: Are You Feeling Suicidal? Come Here First! (part 2) by Tgirl4real(f): 1:02pm On Jul 14, 2013 |
Roland17: I am soooo proud of everyone who has taken the time to keep this thread alive, many do not understand the burden threads like this take off on people, especially since its an anonymous site where people can read and write without loosing their privacy. U are right. That's one main advantage of this platform. |
Re: Are You Feeling Suicidal? Come Here First! (part 2) by married2awizard: 2:08pm On Jul 17, 2013 |
yes I recently started thinking of ending it all I have 3kids and I am married,my husband hits me,hates me,tells me I am bad in bed,and my food is tasteless,same food and sex he enjoyed before married has become bad to him.He is broke now so I spend for the home. I have an embarrassing issues healthwise that seems to have no cure. How long can I continue to love a man that hates me?everyone says you have to stay in your marriage for the kids.ibo men are the most heartless men ever,no sympathy or empathy in their dictionary just their dirty ego and empty pride,their wife means nothing and their family means evertyhing. I cant go on |
Re: Are You Feeling Suicidal? Come Here First! (part 2) by Les: 2:30pm On Jul 17, 2013 |
married2awizard: yes I recently started thinking of ending it allyou shouldn't have married a wizard in the first place. Well, which ever way, am not an advocate of divorce but divorce is better than suicide. To me, if there is something I'll do kill myself for, it will never be for the opposite se.xx, you should try that out,you know? keep us posted.... |
Re: Are You Feeling Suicidal? Come Here First! (part 2) by greatgod2012(f): 2:41pm On Jul 17, 2013 |
married2awizard: yes I recently started thinking of ending it all first of all, dont involve tribalism in this, tribe differs, personality differs, your hubby might not be nice, but not because of his tribe, its due to so many factors like his his upbringing, belief, personality, etc, but his tribe is not included. @op, instead of ending your life, why dont you look beyond that, and go for a break from the marriage for a while, the break might be used to reflect on some issues you are facing in your marriage. An abusive marriage is a no no, therefore, im not asking you to stay in one, but you can separate for a while to correct some abnormalities, and if its not correctable, then, let the marriage be, your life is more important than that marriage. Also, consider your kids, do you want them to suffer? no, i guess, so, its not over until its over, never, i repeat NEVER, think of suicide again, there is still a better future ahead of you, you are still going to eat and enjoy the fruit of your labour on your children, so, buckle up and enjoy life, even, if it has to be as a single parent. May God be with you and see you through. Amen. |
Re: Are You Feeling Suicidal? Come Here First! (part 2) by bellong: 9:03am On Jul 18, 2013 |
married2awizard: yes I recently started thinking of ending it all It brings pains to my heart when I read or see men maltreat their wife. It shows extreme lack of depth about the understanding of what marriage is. Such men do not even know that having troubles with their wives hinders their prayers from being answered. Its a pathetic thing. @Poster, Like said, a bad man is not a function of tribe. There are bad men everywhere across the world. They are just simply bad, either as a result of previous experience or greed and others. Your husband's action is not a result of his tribe, there are Yoruba, Hausa, Itsekiri, Ijaw etc men treating their wives like you. Some men can become violent as a result of financial troubles hence, they transfer their aggression on people close to them especially the wife. It maybe that the present action of your husband is as a result of his financial status and also maybe he is getting irritated by the health challenge you have. For every situation like this, when husband/wife starts treating each other negatively without excuse, I always suggest there should be a long discussion between the parties. Sit down together, express your frustration to him, ask him why he is being violent and intolerant towards you. Extract the reasons from him and let him know you will change. You in turn must also tell him what you don't like and how you can't take the beating anymore. If after this, and he refuses to change, like suggested, I will advise you take a break from him till he comes back to his senses. You need God in your home more than ever, draw nigh unto Him and be prayerful. Can you share the health challenge, doctors on this forum can give you a lasting solution or probably someone may have passed through it before, the person can be of help to you here. It is well with you and your home. |
Re: Are You Feeling Suicidal? Come Here First! (part 2) by Ivynwa(f): 9:05am On Jul 19, 2013 |
married2awizard: yes I recently started thinking of ending it all Please stay alive for your children okay, don't harm yourself. You mustn't continue accepting being hit cause your life is precious to you and your kids. Address that hitting part seriously, don't fold your hands and keep receiving it. Bring in families if possible and pass on the message that you ain't tolerating being hit again. As per the hatings and maltreatment part can you try disarming him with kind and humane treatment when he talks down on you instead of getting angry too and both of you using unkind words at the same time or something. It may give him thoughts that may have him thinking deeper and getting remorseful enough for peace to return. Don't let unhappiness of heart, bad words etc take away joy from your life, overcome them with a good heart and good words. You deserve an aura of happiness around as you mentioned that you have a health issue, No you don't have to share it in the forum as somebody suggested if you don't want to. They have doctors in the forum that you can search for in health related threads and seek advice from in private if you so wish, the problem may have a cure after all. Don't believe anybody that tells you that "you have an incurable this and that that can extinguish your life soon etc". Your life is in God's hands and in God's hand alone and so is your cure too. You can try out different recipes and cook different things that is if he is finding the foods monotonous or something, better still you can lure him into the kitchen and ask for his input on how he wants the food----that way you are indirectly cooking together and I am sure he won't dare say that a food he helped cook tastes bad . It must be hard fending for the family now that he has no source of income. When you come online you can help search around for jobs for him. Somebody made a good post of how he survived joblessness in this thread https://www.nairaland.com/1355537/how-cope-family-man-after/1. He can use the method the man used. Bad heartedness is not a trait found only in one tribe in our country. There are Igbo men that marry their wives well so don't feel like that about the tribe okay. |
Re: Are You Feeling Suicidal? Come Here First! (part 2) by Ivynwa(f): 9:28am On Jul 19, 2013 |
ibkaye: I've been at the lowest of lows but never contemplated suicide, it's sad what life's struggles can drive a person to do, nice topic Stay Strong okay. sanniemoe: Not until last year, I was very suicidal. As a matter of fact,I feel God somehow just kept me alive by mistake cos I was real a depressed and pessimistic person. After 2 failed attempts,It didn't matter how I died but I just wanted to die,the only reason i think im still alive prolly cos i wasnt strong enough 2 stab myself..Thank God I'm getting better now but I pray I get over this totally someday soon... You may worsen things by incapacitating yourself through stabbing and other means you attempted. Things will be terrible when you become bedridden and unable to work hard and better your life so you see---it makes no sense attempting to harm yourself. Why don't you just have fun with life and sail on, someday it's going to be bright and sunny okay Baby? Stay strong. zele---: I will recommend that you read such positive books as ones written by Dale Carnegie and Norman Vincent Peale, they will help you develop a positive mind set. You choose to be happy. If you cling to the unhappy thoughts, they will remain in your mind and keep you saddened so clear your mind of the things that are preventing you from being happy. Take out time and go to places that give you sweet and positive thoughts, the sights of billows of the ocean unwinds me. I have heard others say that such sights in beaches affect them good too. A good experience in a good church, the praises and worship the songs and inspiring words of God cool the mind too. You can try cherishing that if you are a christian. The period after Youth service can be hard especially if you have no job doing. You have to do your best to get a job to do or use a skill you already have to fend for yourself. Remember that you choose to be happy. |
Re: Are You Feeling Suicidal? Come Here First! (part 2) by eruudy(m): 9:52am On Jul 22, 2013 |
I recently lost my mother and she was the bread winner for the family . My dad doesn't care about his kids .. I am neither the eldest nor the youngest but i have taken the mantle of taking care of my family .. I still cannot do enough .. I just feel it's not fair doing all these alone and having to go through alone .. Sometimes i feel i should just stop living to get this over with .. I am 24yrs old and you would be amazed what i have already put away just to be there for my siblings .. |
Re: Are You Feeling Suicidal? Come Here First! (part 2) by maclatunji: 4:14pm On Jul 22, 2013 |
^And may God bless you abundantly with it. 1 Like |
Re: Are You Feeling Suicidal? Come Here First! (part 2) by maclatunji: 4:31pm On Jul 22, 2013 |
married2awizard: yes I recently started thinking of ending it all Madam, they say health is wealth. I know you would have sought lots of treatment but I urge you to keep on trying as best you can. I pray you find a cure, if not please get all the help you can to manage it. You may also consider contacting some of the ladies here in the family section you feel you can trust, they may be able to help you with useful information. It is a danger when a husband gets physically abusive because of the risk of murder. Hence, I urge you to seek viable options to curb it. Try and make the most of the bad situation, begin with little comforts, your children, friends, parents, siblings. One thing I have observed in life is that we all have people who genuinely love us- it might not be romantic but you just have people who are willing to go out of their way to see you happy. If you know anybody close to you willing to support you, let them. Please, I am not suggesting infidelity. It could be your mother relatives or close friends. |
Re: Are You Feeling Suicidal? Come Here First! (part 2) by Kirinwa: 7:44pm On Jul 24, 2013 |
I need help.I feel suicidal. |
Re: Are You Feeling Suicidal? Come Here First! (part 2) by Cestmoi1(f): 8:43pm On Jul 24, 2013 |
Kirinwa: I need help.I feel suicidal.Erase that thought right now.Pls,share your problems with us. 1 Like |
Re: Are You Feeling Suicidal? Come Here First! (part 2) by maclatunji: 8:45am On Jul 25, 2013 |
C'est moi: Exactly, share your problem with us. |
Re: Are You Feeling Suicidal? Come Here First! (part 2) by Kirinwa: 3:37pm On Jul 25, 2013 |
I have always wanted to be a netpreneur.Am in forex and I keep losing all my money.I still want to be an online business man.I have no true love .I want to stand on my own but no capital. |
Re: Are You Feeling Suicidal? Come Here First! (part 2) by maclatunji: 8:48am On Jul 26, 2013 |
Kirinwa: I have always wanted to be a netpreneur.Am in forex and I keep losing all my money.I still want to be an online business man.I have no true love .I want to stand on my own but no capital. How is killing yourself going to solve these problems? You should stop throwing your money into forex. Why don't you sell something tangible, you will be shocked to see the amount of money you can make selling Tecno phones online. You can do majority of your marketing online. You make money and would still be a "netrepreneur". Just a simple idea- there are a lot of viable ideas out there, just read and learn. Making money is not easy- if it were, we would all be millionaires. As for "true love", just live your life positively, those who will love you will do so. You can't force it, it develops naturally. |
Re: Are You Feeling Suicidal? Come Here First! (part 2) by bellong: 9:01am On Jul 26, 2013 |
@Kirinwa, take the advice above and act on it. It is well with you |
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