Cristalz:

@Sweet T
But she said she has assured him that therez no reason for him to be suspicious.You either trust a person or you don't.How do you explain him not liking most of her friends?Not wanting her to have any male friends?That's insecurity.

Words of assurance is one thing, behavior and actions are another. And it's true when they say words are cheap. Most women forget to realize that Behavior builds trust. The only time you take your cards of the table is when it's game time. If there are no games to be played, all cards should be on the table.

Crystal, it will be deceiving to say that in 2months of a close encounter as she described that they have not had sex. On the other hand it is equally possible that they have not.  Her response to the question will clear that.  I am only wondering.  

We have to wonder, what makes battered women remain in a abusive relationship?  Same sentiments _ he is loving and caring!  If you ask them to translate "loving and caring" then you begin to see that the woman is harboring fear and his show of love and care is nothing more than sexual submission. That's the only time she can reach into him.  

Lets give the poster a chance to respond.  Michelin said that she had brought this topic up before and no one responded.  I must not have joined the forum at the time.  If I was here I'm sorry if you did not get my respond. I love topics like this because I learn a lot from how women react to us emotionally and how some of the things they want from us is often coded in terms we men don't understand.  Its kinda like reading Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus _We miscommunicate with each other.

@debo
Ok,trying not to assume too much here,but she did say he called his not wanting her to have male friends 'a guy thing'. Is that really?   And why would the guy say shez in this other dude's car cos he doesn't have one?I think that was unfair of him.

Anyway,perhaps shez really pretty and the guy's just scared of losing her.

@michelin89
How would you like it if you had a clingy,naggy girlfriend?

@Sweet T
I agree with you,but does this mean she should drop all the friends she had cos she now has a boyfriend?Of course shez gotta draw lines with these other dudes and make 'em clear,but what's wrong in letting a male friend give you a ride home? She mentioned just one occurrence.I'm working with what she posted.

Cristalz:


@Sweet T
I agree with you,but does this mean she should drop all the friends she had because she now has a boyfriend?Of course shez gotta draw lines with these other dudes and make 'em clear,but what's wrong in letting a male friend give you a ride home? She mentioned just one occurrence.I'm working with what she posted.

Nope, did not say that. I want guys to admire my girl but she should be wise enough to know where the line is drawn. Besides i don't mind for her to have male friends but not one that calls every night.

Thing is,while some girls give guys reason to doubt,some guys just naturally assume they own a girl's life cos she consented to be his girlfriend.

Well,to be fair to the guy,i don't see where the lady in question said anything about her feelings for him.Just his for her.Maybe this is a one-sided thing,so she doesn't understand how he feels.Just a thot.

In short,this story is incomplete.

@ Poster,

I am just reading your own side of the coin to this matter. Tell your boyfriend or is it boo (you people call it these days), to come on Romance-Nairaland and state his own defense / side of the story.

Then and only then, I can make a decision on the matter for you guys.

Pataki:

@ Poster,

I am just reading your own side of the coin to this matter. Tell your boyfriend or is it boo (you people call it these days), to come on Romance-Nairaland and state his own defense / side of the story.

Then and only then, I can make a decision on the matter for you guys.

^{Is this where I "lmao"!!}

@post
leave him like a used up tissue paper. . possessive/obsessiveness can be lethal

Sweet T:

And your point is?

You need to tell him how you feel in this relationship. If he doesn't see anything wrong with his character, then you'd better bounce.

stephanay:

ive been dating my boyfriend for close to 2months now and im sensing some traits of a control freak. he questions every one i \m friends with and tells me who i shld see or not. i don't av a prob wt him aving female friends but he just doesnt want me to av any guy friends and he tells me its a "guy thing"
we got into a big argument lately and he said he desont like d fact that a male friend dropped me off after class one day. he was only trying to help me with transportaion home. and my boyfriend said its because he doenst av a car that i don't want to brek my freindship wt d guy.
ive explained to him that i'll never cheat on him but trust issues keep coming up and i don't know how much of ds i can take.
he loves me very much and he's very caring but he calls me like all the time to find out hw im doing, wants to see me everyday if he can, doesnt like almost all my frinds, even d gals. i first tot this was his way of expressiing love but now,, im feeling choked up! what do i do??

All I know is your own side of the story. No guy chokes on a lady for no reason. There must have been somethings he saw that he has decided to give all this attention all to you.

I do not see you as the all-in-all perfection for this relationship. I am sure you must have your own faults in this relationship.

What else do you want from him? He gives you all the attention a lady would crave for, yet you are complaining he is choking you up. If he had the ''I don't care attitude'' you do be complaining about that as well.

No man is the embodiment of perfection in a relationship. Talk it out with him and do not think the suggestion people proffer here will set your relationship straight.

Until I know his own side of the story, I do not think making a one sided judgment on this matter is worthwhile and appropriate.

to all d questions about sex no we avnt had sex!

now does it matter? wht has it got to do wt d issue on ground.

he says im not submissive dats y i dont listen to his correction about pple he's not comfy wt (all guys)

stephanay:

to all d questions about sex no we avnt had sex!

now does it matter? wht has it got to do wt d issue on ground.

he says im not submissive that is y i don't listen to his correction about people he's not comfy wt (all guys)

Once a man starts shouting submission, bullshit him. He is suffering from a very grave pathology called LOW SELF ESTEEM!

for those askin for the other side of the story, why don't to refer her to curtis court or judge judy?? she has stated her situation so why dont u give your opinion based on that instead of demanding a sequel? clearly the guy would have something to say to justify his loony act which makes it a battle of accusations and counter-accusations.

@stephany- nobody has your best interest @ heart more than u, self preservation and survival are core human instincts, please act in your own best interest.

thanx for clarifyin the sex thing, no biggie anyways.

stephanay:

ive been dating my bf for close to 2months now and im sensing some traits of a control freak. he questions every one i \m friends with and tells me who i shld see or not. i dont av a prob wt him aving female friends but he just doesnt want me to av any guy friends and he tells me its a "guy thing"
we got into a big argument lately and he said he desont like d fact that a male friend dropped me off after class one day. he was only trying to help me with transportaion home. and my bf said its becos he doenst av a car that i dont want to brek my freindship wt d guy.
ive explained to him that i'll never cheat on him but trust issues keep coming up and i dont know how much of ds i can take.
he loves me very much and he's very caring but he calls me like all the time to find out hw im doing, wants to see me everyday if he can, doesnt like almost all my frinds, even d gals. i first tot this was his way of expressiing love but now,, im feeling choked up! what do i do??

Gay alert

I also have a possesive bf, he tells me to avoid my male friends, i got so mad when he told me he doesn't like my brother and pastor, because of the way they watched me, he accuses me of sleeping with any male creature he sees, at times he goes everywhere with me...but how do we stop it, when i started making my bf understand we needed trust and privacy 4 each other, he reduced his possessive acts...what you need is communication, let him understand you let him know your stand and your boundaries. love is for both happiness.

stephanay:

ive been dating my bf for close to 2months now and im sensing some traits of a control freak. he questions every one i \m friends with and tells me who i shld see or not. i dont av a prob wt him aving female friends but he just doesnt want me to av any guy friends and he tells me its a "guy thing"
we got into a big argument lately and he said he desont like d fact that a male friend dropped me off after class one day. he was only trying to help me with transportaion home. and my bf said its becos he doenst av a car that i dont want to brek my freindship wt d guy.
ive explained to him that i'll never cheat on him but trust issues keep coming up and i dont know how much of ds i can take.
he loves me very much and he's very caring but he calls me like all the time to find out hw im doing, wants to see me everyday if he can, doesnt like almost all my frinds, even d gals. i first tot this was his way of expressiing love but now,, im feeling choked up! what do i do??

Talk to him..

Martins00:
What do u expect when u date a broke ass dude. He would always be scared of loosing you because he is got no car. How do u guys go out on dates? With okada??

Mehn!!! Is something wrong with ur brain U talk like a child!!! Wats wrong if he goes on a date wit okada??

Martins00:
What do u expect when u date a broke ass dude. He would always be scared of loosing you because he is got no car. How do u guys go out on dates? With okada??

Mehn!!! Is something wrong with ur brain U talk like a child!!! Wats wrong if he goes on a date wit okada??

buzyDiva:

abi o . . nuthing u do is ever good enuff for them

Ur talking abt ur ex abi