bluespice:

damn!
i really wish you'll acknowledge my texts and voice mails, you know just telling me not to contact you again will be good. . . i mean i'll know where i stand but this. . . .this is just killing me.
Do something! will you!!

OK!



But seriously, I have a friend who is doing the same thing to me right now. Am so mad at her and I have decided to let her be

kay9:

Had my pick-ax and rusty machete ready, but . . . i can see you did the job yourself already. Mmmh, now what are we gonna do about all that blood? It clots u know, and becomes sticky and icky and mushy . . . .

I threw it in the sea and told the detectives it was Moses who made the sea red They fell for it

sino:

Ha! Epi you murdered santa in cold blood?No wonder he never came down me imagenary chimney.You owe me a ps3 & xbox360 lol

yep, no more Santa. Santa is was a stalker. Imagine, he sees us when we are sleeping, he knows when we are awake

Sisi_Kill:

@ epi and my boss.
Well no matter, Easter is just round the corner, let's see who's gonna have the last laugh. In case you can't wait. . . That would be ME! Ah!

:oYou mean you are going to murder the Easter Bunny? OMG!  Well, good luck on catching that wabbit. It's not easy, just ask Elmer Fudd


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2JMmyHWO424&NR=1

@topic

  I just hate when people call me and say "on this big Sunday you yade yade yada"  Seriously, the last time I checked Sunday has 24 hours like Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday and Saturday.  *sigh* What's so big about Sunday

ok, i am going to be the prick that i usually am now

the aim of my prickness this time is to ensure we dont laspe into

those looong periods of word drought we get into


so here is the order passed out from the eveel within me

all board members of the book of rants(you know yasef)

must rant about atleast one thing in a day,the more rants in a day the better

by the end of the year we should be large enuff to give an award to the maddest ranter on this thread

if you dont rant, i wld ,i wld , hmmmmmm. . . . . . . . . . . . haunt you, find you. . .and consequently practice removing

you skin starting from your nails with a nail cutter. . . i aint joking

regular members:

upgrade punks, upgrade! if not you in trails would always be used to wipe the section here

pick on new members ,tear em apart earn your stripes


prospective members


impress us, show us what you got. . . . . . . . and be ready to be a hired gun for any of the board members

that would be your test of bloodthirstiness










we dont have a constitution , but consider this one. . . . before the end of this year

book of rants should have its own, admin rights

intellectuals arent always pushovers. . . .we need to get grimy dirty and eveel. .

Oooh sounds intwesting, mehn i need to fine tune me rants.Hey did u say our own awards? Awards like da most kwazyest ranter? Im all excited with just da toughts.Ok guyz lets blaze this year, letz rant like never before.Huhahahahehehe(my eveel laughter).

114 movies, hardly 20 were interesting, names can be deceiving. Art of war III u would fink a well ochestrated action film, but what! amateurs! got bored in d first 5min. Angels &demon? what was i finking?Direct contact,kill shot, i must have been fooled by the names.What will it take to get a good film online dat is less than 100mb and its free!?

sino

avatar (which i hear is the movie the highest selling movie in the shortest days, 1 billion in 17days)

my fav for last year, gerald bulter's law abiding citizen


meanwhile where tha @$#%#%#% is your rant?

oooooooooooh i loved law abiding citizen!

Rant? well, niffin much
cat damn! i gotta go to an exhibition tomao! grrrrrrrrrrrrrrr now i gotta go find out how to get there
bleurgh! anyone know of any schools where they don't get assignments or tests?

What the freaking heck?

Rules?

You are kidding me right?

Rules for this thread? Really? I mean Seriously?

Hello! This is the rant thread, where we rant against society and the rules it imposes on us. This is where we sit when everyone stands, we shout when everyone is quiet, kill and have fun doing it.

We are the antithesis of rules and toeing the line.

Don't ruin us.





Yipeee! I've got my own rant in for the day.

sisi, yeah rant about it

i swear i'm going to kick the next person that says 'corper how are you' [size=5pt]provided he isnt strong enough to beat me[/size] NYSC is such a scam, cant wait to be over and done with this crap.

i hate weevils. . .how the hell did they get into my beans?, and i was looking forward to cooking it too, mark my words weevils are the devils spawn.

guess i'll have to survive on chocolate and chin chin tonight. in fact i'm tired of this bachelor crap, wetin?

and then my bosses son comes knocking, i pretend to be asleep but he wont go away, he spends 2hrs toying with my computer and leaves my touch pad sticky, i'm thinking "if your dad wasn't my boss, i'd throttle you, confirmed!"

i now have to help my neighbours son with an Optics assignment, OPTICS, i haven't done that in close to 10years, i'm sure he's wondering how i managed

to finish university, but i dont care jo. . .

my other neighbours children(5-7) are shouting 'holy ghost' fire outside. . .and no they aren't praying, they're muslims

netotse:


my other neighbours children(5-7) are shouting 'holy ghost' fire outside. . .and no they aren't praying, their muslims

lollllllllll

Do you know the definition of fc.ukd up? It's spending ur whole hols in school reading, swotting for your tests 20 hours in a 24hr day, having countless sleepless nights tryna remember which particular drug has which particular side effect,only to find out that your retarded, lazy exam co-ordinator has postponed the tests. . .WTF? It's bin 24 hrs since I got the news and the thought of it still makes me angry as hell, when I think of all the free food I missed, the parties and booze I had to forfeit, the fact that I spent Christmas away from my family, only to be told it was all in vain,I feel like killing someone. If I could catch that stupid EC, I'd sew his eyelids to his forehead so he'd know how it felt not to sleep for days cos u're reading, I'd skin his a.ss so he'd feel the pain I felt when I sat down at some desk for hours, I'd tie up his oesophagus so he'd know how it feels to go hungry cos no restaurants are open and you're to busy to cook, I'd. . . .FCUKIT!!


Happy New Year ranters, how's the year been so far? I wonder how Ari expects the one rant per day feat to be pulled off, and I second Bluespice in asking for a school where there's no assignments, no tests, and no early morning lectures, my study cells don't start working till 11am and my stupid lecturers with their marital problems have been fixing lectures for 7am, imagine.
Newaiz, happy new year once again, have a rant-filled year.

sisi: rant or be ranted at, btw running from rules into this place is actually true the essence of making you rant everyday is because you are needed to

stay angry enough to rant, so that should come easy, if it doesnt, just think of me, how much i have made your life a misery, that should help right?

vesc: roll your behind here and rant young man

kay9:am waiting

bluspice: no more one liners from you

netotse: kill them pricks

ravenzord: well, lets kill em too

ok. . . .

why cant i just go shoot someone cos for whatever reason

my life is miserable with em,

consciously or unconsciously they affect me

i need me supernatural powers

enough to transfer, the misery i am feeling over to em

even when i wanna hate(which is easier than indifference) i cant muster it up

i hate me. . . . .gah

just left with one solution

albeit a dramatic one

taking the blaze out of the equation

killing the blazeman

but for the life of me , the method to use defies me

a bullet to the head might hurt

what if i dont hit the vitals

and have to suffer through intense pain before dying

poison would cause pain

cant have pain before death

standing on the express road

people would think am mad

cant have people calling me mad

just before my demise

overspeeding and hoping something happens

well, did 260 on thatcher a while back

and noting happened
moreso this is my decision and not thatcher's


thought there was a song six million ways to die?

okay isnt there any of these ways that is relatively painless?

painless ind d

you seem to want castrating

you to be my reason for

staying alive

i can oblige you

@ ari: Trust me, a shot to the head is painless. You won't feel anything cos all the nerve impulses eliciting pain are carried to the brain, and the brain has nowhere to send it's own pain impulses to,geddit? Alternatively you could hire some high-priced hooker to inject you with arsenic just when you're having the little death, turn it to the big one. . .that would be pleasurable.

nah that wont be near dramatic enough

its a good thing you have ranted today

new rule , no rant to questions hehehehehehe


this year's reign would be worse than nero's entire madness

my FB account got hacked. . .

from my cell phone too. . .

whoever did it is a goner. . .

i'll show him i have 5 different grandmothers. . .

mess the idıot up from 5 different directions. . .

from my cell phone sef. . .thats the height of it!

i'm so darn hungry i can hardly type straight. . .

one more hour till closing. . .

if my bosses son comes near my door he's going to get it i swear!

netotse: if you continue this way

your promotion may come rapidly

in the normal world am not sure thats a good thing

but hey who gives ah @%#$#%#%



bet your fb was hacked into by a gal

who prolly fancies you

and wants to confirm you aint playing nookie

i knew fb was wahala, when a colleague got

a call from a customer, decided she was rude and wanted to find out how she looked

next thing put her name on fb, whala. . . . . . . face popped up


find the girl and choke her with her g-string

that should be fun, make her gag on those contraption called bras



as for your small boss

just kill the brat!

Just signing the register

hey blaze, lording it over us already, ain'tcha?

And whadja know, MyneW even decided to pay us a visit!

N'ways, i just wanna talk about my phone - my ex-phone, actually.

"Ex", because it's now deceased. Yep, i killed it - darn, fu.cked-up, metallo-plastic contraption. it had it coming too.

For going on 3 weeks now, the dam.ned thing has been a source of annoyance, frustration, and down-right embarassment to me.

All thru xmas, na so my GF (the current one, n'ways ) just dey watch me as i dey fight to answer call on the ye-ye thing.

On how i try to browse, or even dare type SMS, na serious wahala.

Did i mention it is a - sorry, it was a 5200 nokia? well it was.

i admit i wasn't overly nice to the silly phone but those things are supposed to be built tough, right?

That's why i never got them Nseries and Eseries and Zseries and whatever series they have now -

those cry-babes never last longer than a month before one thing happens to them - usually they just fall on the ground, and kapiche!

So i got a strong 5200. How was i to know that they fall hardest who climb highest?

Mehn, you need to see me trying to press "Menu" on this banza machine - the buttons ABSOLUTELY refused to respond.

The biggest nightmare occurs when i try to type an SMS: i can type but i can't delete; i can scroll down but i can't scroll up; i can add recipients but i can't remove; and

the worst frustration of all, i can edit but I CAN'T bleeping SEND THE FUC.KING MSG!!!  

Now tell me, what good is an SMS if i can't frigging send it, huh?!

The last straw was yesterday when i got an SMS from mumsie - and the naughty as.s-wipe of a contraption refused to open it!!!

I pressed and pressed and pressed and yet, the bitc.h-oriented gizmolacullum refused to respond!!

So. . .

So. . .

So. . .  i reared back as far as i could and DASHED THE bleeping PHONE AGAINST THE WALL!!!

Yup, dam.n you, phone!!! Go to hell (or where ever it is bad phones go to) and burn to ashes!!

I kicked the darn thing and clawed at it and generally reduced it to smithereens. Goodbye fu.cked up 5200, good riddance!!




I'll go and buy a blackberry curve tomorrow - even if i have to borrow dough!!

Seun, stop changing my curse words to bleeps!!!!

now that is a rant

if i have ever read one

i know someone

that would emphatise with you over your phone

the person is worse than you

lets see

destroyed a tmobile phone, N72, a black berry tour, sony ericssion W800, and someother nameless phones within a 6month period

yep and she claims the handsets are the devil's kids . . . . . .

Im sick and tired of this shit! I said i have retired! Read ma bleeping lips re-TI-RED! You call in the early hours,you visit unannounced & you make my life miserable. I try to be polite&smile when u ask:hope im not disturbing? Hell yeah! You fricking disturb my peace! You dont pay me for this service i render i wonder what gave you the impression you can call and come visit anytime? Have had it to my limits, next time you bring ya phones i'll make sure i toss em into the well,and if you make a sound, i wont hesitate to make you join em.

Kay's rant should win an award. Hilarious stuff.

I am waiting for something.
4 days now, I've been waiting for this thing.
If soon I don't get this thing.
I will break someone's head with something.
If I get no satisfaction from this thing.
I'll look for another thing.
To pulverize the bloodied head cuz I don't care about anything anymore and I'd give up everything which really is nothing to get this thing which is the only thing I really want right now. Don't ask. Y'all know I don't divulge my bidness.

@Kay9
THAT was a Rant!!

Hi all

vescucci:

Kay's rant should win an award. Hilarious stuff.

Ok, i don't want to "form" ingrate or kill-joy - bless your heart and soul, V, but really - f.u.ck the award. I don't want one. The thought of that blasted contraption still has me seeing red.

One good thing tho - i am now totally and officially UNREACHABLE! Hahaha! , my boss kept trying my number this morning, silly shlob prolly kept getting the number u're trying is not available at the moment, please trying again next year. . ." In the end he called the security guy and asked him to come find me. Serves him right, dam.ne.d slowpoke is always putting sand in my garri.

Hope it aint "congo" you're waiting for , V - the thing dey get expiry date these days o!

sino, don't toss into a well; break 'em, smash 'em, pounderize 'em - see, like i did my own. nobody'll ever bother you again

tubabie last warning if you have to comment,rant first,moreso you are flirting with demotion ooo t

Erm, I wanted to rant, but I see kay has done all my ranting for me .

Havi nu ya my pellow feoful.

Hope u all enjoy d juice and honey dis year will bring. And I bind every rant spirit on every soul here in, name. Lol

Who are those making foolish noises about me being a scammer? Bunch of delusional monkeys! Don't worry, you shall all be ready for a showdown but for now, you can keep running your mouth for as long and as much as you want.

Now that I have spoken a little on here, they'll swarm here like bees or like vampires that had just found blood. . . . . don't bother too much, I'm not back yet (just testing my account) -- I'm enjoying watching from the sidelines though. In case you're wondering who I am, I am TheSeeker. Fools!

J-CzAr:

Who are those making foolish noises about me being a scammer . . . . .

Sooo . . . . are you a scammer?