Ok.... i understand you.. mind games work BUT not on everyone and definitelt not everytime

The question is how effective will the mind games be?

The issue is there festering

what if he gets tired and calls your bluff and runs to the arms of the other woman

edwife:



Lol,pickabeau that's will not be a good day for him,not physically though i am not a violent person......

But he will surely remember that day ,you know what they say about quiet people....

I won't even talk about it at first,maybe for a week or so....

Mind game is wicked...

edwife:



Lol,pickabeau that's will not be a good day for him,not physically though i am not a violent person......

But he will surely remember that day ,you know what they say about quiet people....

I won't even talk about it at first,maybe for a week or so....

Mind game is wicked...

we all know what a woman can do. No need for details jaRe. If we can throw fits and tantrum ova small things. Even playing nice will be torment

sheunfemix:
we all know what a woman can do. No need for details jaRe. If we can throw fits and tantrum ova small things. Even playing nice will be torment

coogar:


most women can't stand rejection....
if the man's discourtesy is solid enough, the promiscuous mistress would back off in no time. if a mistress keeps coming back, it's because the man himself is giving mixed signals.......
.

That level of discourtesy is what some men are not capable of. And it's not like they are interested or giving mixed signals but they just don't have that venom inside them to spit out. And here you have a firebrand for a wife who is watching all this. for how long can she hold herself and not react? Imagine reading all the chats, seeing the phone ring severally through the night?

aisha2:


Yes Nigeria, that we disregard the law doesnt mean it doesnt exist.

My cousin had a stalker, calling like 50 times, dropping messages at his office, calling his wife and publiclly embarassing him by accusing him of impregnanting her. Someone he had seen only once or twice never even hugged.

He reported her, she was called and asked to write a statement, also write an affidavit never to bother him again or face arrest and proesecution.

Everyone man or woman has a right to their safety and sanity.

It's good news to hear a stalker case that was rightly addressed but I still have my doubts as to how many men will report a female admirer turned stalker or how well the case will be treated in most police stations.

Kimoni:

It's good news to hear a stalker case that was rightly addressed but I still have my doubts as to how many men will report a female admirer turned stalker or how well the case will be treated in most police stations.

Kimoni:

It's good news to hear a stalker case that was rightly addressed but I still have my doubts as to how many men will report a female admirer turned stalker or how well the case will be treated in most police stations.

Maybe because we have adopted a culture of taking laws into our hands.

aisha2:
About fighting for what we believe in, If the man believed in us he will fight whatever temptation. That he cheated means he doesnt believe in us in the first place, so there is nothing to fight for

Exactly. Once you start to fight for an adult, it means you never deserved him/her in the first place. If he really values what we have, he will ward off temptatons the same way he expects me to ward temptations. Thats where self respect comes in. He has his own responsibility while i have mine. Everyone carries their own load.

Kimoni:

That level of discourtesy is what some men are not capable of. And it's not like they are interested or giving mixed signals but they just don't have that venom inside them to spit out.

excellent point!
most men don't just have that venom in them to tell a woman off. we were mostly trained to chase & not to be chased. it's not really a familiar territory for the men....

And here you have a firebrand for a wife who is watching all this. for how long can she hold herself and not react? Imagine reading all the chats, seeing the phone ring severally through the night?

that's a different case entirely.
just because a man is reluctant to unleash venom on an admirer of the opposite sėx doesn't mean she should disrespect the wife at home by calling at odd hours, sending sassy messages or disturbing images....

the husband shouldn't condone such. she has to be kept at arm's length & if the stalking persists then maybe the police should be involved. a woman camped outside ramsey nouah's house for 3 days claiming God told her she should be his wife....it was after the 3rd day police were involved to drive the woman away.

3 days & 3 nights?? it got me thinking - would a man have been allowed to stay there for 3 days if he was stalking a wife? a typical naija wife would have boiled a bucket of water mixed with pepper & pour it on him.

pickabeau1:
Ok.... i understand you.. mind games work BUT not on everyone and definitelt not everytime

The question is how effective will the mind games be?

The issue is there festering

what if he gets tired and calls your bluff and runs to the arms of the other woman

What will he be tired of?I did not disturb or nag him did i?So what will he be tired of?

And if he choose to go back in her arms,does it not say something? HE DOES NOT WANT YOU ANYMORE.... simple....

Question is,will I be meeting him often in that scenario?and will i always play cool all the time?....NO....

Differents situations call for different measures.....

Kimoni:


It's good news to hear a stalker case that was rightly addressed but I still have my doubts as to how many men will report a female admirer turned stalker or how well the case will be treated in most police stations.

Sincerely, a stalker cannot continue to stalk for long especially when you have shown to be steadfast, unmovable, disciplined and consistent in your stance!! How jobless can one be to keep stalking another? Once a man lets his wife know and they botth come together to ward off temptations, they will come out victorious! if a man is that weak like a puppet, let him let his wife know o. However they choose to handle it is up to them.

Exactly.. you did not nag
You were quiet
He is scared you are going to murder him in sleep or poison

Mind games can be risky



At bolded... that is the meatof this thread
What will u do... when u dont want to play cool

handcuffs?

edwife:


What will he be tired of?I did not disturb or nag him did i?So what will he be tired of?

And if he choose to go back in her arms,does it not say something? HE DOES NOT WANT YOU ANYMORE.... simple....

Question is,will I be meeting him often in that scenario?and will i always play cool all the time?....NO....

Differents situations call for different measures.....

Sophyrocks:


If the mistress is doing the chasing, can't the man tell his wife? most men feel they can handle it and do not bother telling their wives.both the husband and his wife can report to the police.

If the mistress neveer knew a man was married, doesnt that tell you the man is majorly at fault here? Why hide his marital status? so that he can keep deceiving many other girls? Can you see why the man is at fault and shoulld be dealt with?

Point 1 - the assumption is that he told his wife. check my comments to Aisha on the police angle.

In addresssing point 2 - That the man is guilty and should be dealt with is in no doubt here. I said confronting the mistress where she has no knowledge the man is married can achieve something if the mistress is moral enough to end the relationship.

pickabeau1:
Exactly.. you did not nag
You were quiet
He is scared you are going to murder him in sleep or poison

Mind games can be risky



At bolded... that is the meatof this thread
What will u do... when u dont want to play cool

handcuffs?

Nooo,he should just keep it in his trouser next time.....

@bolded ahahahah

You don't wanna know,do you?

At least you won't hear it from me.....

Yes he should... thats the best

You ladies are keeping quiet but always making veiled threats.. Only sheun has said her one clearly

Playing it cool online eh??[ meanwhileyou guys love una hubby

I put it t you,... u will raise fire and brimstone on that womans head

Then deal with hubby and make him straight and narrow

edwife:


Nooo,he should just keep it in his trouser next time.....

@bolded ahahahah

You don't wanna know,do you?

At least you won't hear it from me.....

So there is a grown man out there who can't resist the chase of a small girl?
Story for the gods
I never believe any man who claims girls are the ones chasing him?
Your hubby is not a toddler nah
Giving the mistress attention makes her feel she has an upper hand
I have had to call a girl once and I looked like an fo0l after that
It's painful when a man misbehaves but then you have no business with the mistress

Kimoni:
What if the mistress is the one doing the chasing? And has been rebuffed by the man several times but she won't stop? Or perhaps, the girl doesn't even know he is married like cococandy's example in one of the threads?

Shouldn't the woman face the mistress in this kinda situations?

At that point she is not a "mistress" - just a shameless heffer !

If wifey is confident putting her in her place if an opportune moment arises, why not? I'd still prefer the man to be quite firm in rebuking her - and calling the authorities if need be.

@OP Aisha 2 & Bukatyne covered off most of what I wanted to say. I'd add these three points as to why a wife shouldn't

1. The mistress may be a black-belt in some oriental fightin style - or simply bigger, stronger and more visous than the wife.
2. She may not actually be "the mistress" in question - mistaken identity - or know he's married?
3. A weaker one - but it may actually be over and she may have repented


TV

coogar:


excellent point!
most men don't just have that venom in them to tell a woman off. we were mostly trained to chase & not to be chased. it's not really a familiar territory for the men....



that's a different case entirely.
just because a man is reluctant to unleash venom on an admirer of the opposite sėx doesn't mean she should disrespect the wife at home by calling at odd hours, sending sassy messages or disturbing images....

the husband shouldn't condone such. she has to be kept at arm's length & if the stalking persists then maybe the police should be involved. a woman camped outside ramsey nouah's house for 3 days claiming God told her she should be his wife....it was after the 3rd day police were involved to drive the woman away.

3 days & 3 nights?? it got me thinking - would a man have been allowed to stay there for 3 days if he was stalking a wife? a typical naija wife would have boiled a bucket of water mixed with pepper & pour it on him.

Coogar but it's not a different case now, a mistress that is bent on having a man will call severally, send him endless nude pictures, send him flowers, you know how women do these things, shouldn't the wife step in at this stage?

3 days and 3 nights outside my house? Na OPC go shoot the man accidentally

pickabeau1:
Yes he should... thats the best

You ladies are keeping quiet but always making veiled threats.. Only sheun has said her one clearly

Playing it cool online eh??[ meanwhileyou guys love una hubby

I put it t you,... u will raise fire and brimstone on that womans head

Then deal with hubby and make him straight and narrow

ahahaha ,you crazy...

Anyone who knows me,will tell you i don't do physical....especially not with the other woman,no no no....

As for my man,make him straight and narrow,depends on where....

Truth is if it is once,i will overlook and ready for a clean start,but that's all i can promise....

Kimoni:


Point 1 - the assumption is that he told his wife. check my comments to Aisha on the police angle.

In addresssing point 2 - That the man is guilty and should be dealt with is in no doubt here. I said confronting the mistress where she has no knowledge the man is married can achieve something if the mistress is moral enough to end the relationship.

Point 1 taken.

Point 2, Nope. You dnt solve a problem from the top. You solve it from the root. The root of the problem in this case is that the man never mentioned he was married. Have you asked yourself why a man would DELIBERATELY hide his marital status? Why would he do that? Is he not the source of the problem? A wise woman would deal with that problem head on so that the useless man will not continue to deceive other single women.

Sophyrocks:


Sincerely, a stalker cannot continue to stalk for long especially when you have shown to be steadfast, unmovable, disciplined and consistent in your stance!! How jobless can one be to keep stalking another? Once a man lets his wife know and they botth come together to ward off temptations, they will come out victorious! if a man is that weak like a puppet, let him let his wife know o. However they choose to handle it is up to them.

Simple....

Those girls,don't like it when they know the man told his wife about them,they lose interest.It 's like they have been overpowered...They no longer have control....

Kimoni:


Coogar but it's not a different case now, a mistress that is bent on having a man will call severally, send him endless nude pictures, send him flowers, you know how women do these things, shouldn't the wife step in at this stage?

3 days and 3 nights outside my house? Na OPC go shoot the man accidentally

Wait o,

Someone wants you to put your hand inside fire... if there an amount of pleading that will make you put your hand in the fire?

Why would a woman keep stalking a man when he shows no interest persistently?

Even guys back off a girl after her not giving them face repeatedly.

edwife:
I have utterly no business with any nyama nyama girl out there....

I am the type that will meet my man and the mistress in a shop or eatery,and not raise a finger....

I do my business and waka pass them,as if i did not see them .

He will surely come back home.... and we will have proper talk....

You are I know this is very far from the truth. Unless you already know about the mistress, so its no longer a big deal.

Cool....


So all this hard women things na just online formings.....


...

edwife:


ahahaha ,you crazy...

Anyone who knows me,will tell you i don't do physical....especially not with the other woman,no no no....

As for my man,make him straight and narrow,depends on where....

Truth is if it is once,i will overlook and ready for a clean start,but that's all i can promise....

TV01:

At that point she is not a "mistress" - just a shameless heffer !

If wifey is confident putting her in her place if an opportune moment arises, why not? I'd still prefer the man to be quite firm in rebuking her - and calling the authorities if need be.

@OP Aisha 2 & Bukatyne covered off most of what I wanted to say. I'd add these three points as to why a wife shouldn't

1. The mistress may be a black-belt in some oriental fightin style - or simply bigger, stronger and more visous than the wife.
2. She may not actually be "the mistress" in question - mistaken identity
3. A weaker one - but it may actually be over and she may have repented

TV

Agree, at that point, she is something else but still a potential threat to the marriage.

Your second point is what i am driving at.

Agree with their points too but where I disagree is where you put blanket over it by saying a wife is never ever justified in confronting the mistress or potential threat as the case may be. It's not advisable in most cases but in some scenarios, it might just be the way out.

edwife:



Simple....

Those girls,don't like it when they know the man told his wife about them,they lose interest.It 's like they have been overpowered...They no longer have control....

Of course. Most ladies you see around married men brragging about is as a result of the ffact that the men have given them so much power and guts to break homes. Seriously, if a man respects his wife, he will not cheat on her let alone give a mistress so much power over their marriage. Everything depends on the man and not the mistress.

bukatyne:

Wait o,
Someone wants you to put your hand inside fire... if there an amount of pleading that will make you put your hand in the fire?
Why would a woman keep stalking a man when he shows no interest persistently?
Even guys back off a girl after her not giving them face repeatedly.

There are stalkers ohhhhh. Please lets not make the assumption that its only when you give them attention they stay. Stalkers have a sickness they twist reality. I had one, it was bad, never showed him the slightest interest but he had already made me his wife in his mind and had named our kids. Will call me 20 times first thing in the morning followed by a barrage of text messages, threaten to come to my hosue, my office send me pictures of myself, my family etc. It was bad. People laughed it off and said the guy was in "Love". I however reported to the Security agencies and he was invited after sending some threats asked to write never to contact me again.

Watch channel 171 there is a special program on stalking and stalkers. A man stalked a couple claiming to be their son infact almost killed them. Stalking is bad and dangerous, has nothing to do with the victim giving attention or lack of it

Nashville:


You are I know this is very far from the truth. Unless you already know about the mistress, so its no longer a big deal.

I kid you not....

Not everyone was born with an iron arm or fighting skills...

We do have differents ways of fighting....

I love my life so much as to involve myself in something that will probably affect my vision or leave me with a scar.....

Ain't the husband coming back home?

Sophyrocks:


Of course. Most ladies you see around married men brragging about is as a result of the ffact that the men have given them so much power and guts to break homes. Seriously, if a man respects his wife, he will not cheat on her let alone give a mistress so much power over their marriage. Everything depends on the man and not the mistress.

So the mistress is not doing any wrong. It seems we are giving these daughters of jezebel a free pass aint we.

The men no doubt are dogs, but shouldnt these girls be called biatches too? When they know nothing happens, they are even encouraged to break more homes. And then they get married hoping to have loving husbands?

TV01:

At that point she is not a "mistress" - just a shameless heffer !




1. The mistress may be a black-belt in some oriental fightin style - or simply bigger, stronger and more visous than the wife.

in that case she will beat the bejeezes out of the so called man at some point.

win win situation.

maybe the wife was doing sme sme before, saying she must not disrespect her creeping husband.



let the creeping mistress do it for you.

bukatyne:

Wait o,
Someone wants you to put your hand inside fire... if there an amount of pleading that will make you put your hand in the fire?
Why would a woman keep stalking a man when he shows no interest persistently?
Even guys back off a girl after her not giving them face repeatedly.

. : Wikipedia:Harassment for harassment-related policies on Wikipedia.
Stalking is unwanted or obsessive attention by an individual or group toward another person. Stalking behaviors are related to harassment and intimidation and may include following the victim in person or monitoring them. The word stalking is used, with some differing meanings, in psychology and psychiatry and also in some legal jurisdictions as a term for a criminal offense.

According to a 2002 report by the National Center for Victims of Crime, "virtually any unwanted contact between two people that directly or indirectly communicates a threat or places the victim in fear can be considered stalking,"[1] although in practice the legal standard is usually somewhat stricter.

bukatyne:


Wait o,

Someone wants you to put your hand inside fire... if there an amount of pleading that will make you put your hand in the fire?

Why would a woman keep stalking a man when he shows no interest persistently?

Even guys back off a girl after her not giving them face repeatedly.

My dear, several reasons ooo

Obsession about his looks, his money, his person, his office whatever. Or perhaps for the ultimate benefit eg students and lecturers, applicants and whoever it is that's going to make it click. I just know this shit happens.

Kimoni:


Agree, at that point, she is something else but still a potential threat to the marriage.

Your second point is what i am driving at.

Agree with their points too but where I disagree is where you put blanket over it by saying a wife is never ever justified in confronting the mistress or potential threat as the case may be. It's not advisable in most cases but in some scenarios, it might just be the way out.

My second point is in relation to my first. If it's still at the shameless heffer stage and wife is with hubby, a withering put-down can end things.

Other than that, I think the wife should stay classy at all times and not sully herself by physically engaging the mistrss - it almost makes them competitors. Wives should never, ever elevate her or demean themselves.


TV