.

tpia:

I'm sure there's thread about single fathers somewhere.

This one is specifically aimed at single mothers.

Okay then. . .

I will never advise any man to marry a woman with child/ren for someone else

Okay then. . .

I will never advise any man to marry a woman with child/ren for someone else

Are you saying that widows and widowers should forget about love and marriage?

.

You all guys should understand that we are not saying its ideal to be a single mother. The dream of every child is to be born into a matrimonial home. But you see, that's not the reality we face. And i strongly do not believe that just because you blew it up the first time, you do not deserve a second chance. If the gal is not married and you love her for her, and think she is matured enough to be your wife and that she has effectively accepted the reality of her past and is ready to move ahead, nothing stops you from going ahead. All you need to do is to address who takes responsibility for the innocent child.

If you are ready to take the responsibility and love them both. why not?

I have not tried to run anyone down and I have not said people will not marry anyone. (Even those who have 5 kids).

All I know is that I can never honestly advise any single person to marry someone that comes with a baggage except if they are desperate.
Everything has a pitfall but there are some things that have very obvious pitfalls so it's best to avoid the obvious pitfalls.

wbb

This is what i ave noticed.
Before you came in the picture, there is always a bond btw the child and the mother/father.
Your presence threatens that bond and the child is always feeling insecured.
When there is a problem, the child will tend to wanna support the biological parent and that could be hurtful.
But i have noticed that women/man with a kid are always responsible, cos they have to grow up, however, not all oh.

single motherhood is not a crime. look at d personality. if she's someone u really like, then u go ahead. if not, pls move on and let her b.
Most single mothers didnt become single mothers by choice.
Mothers have special love for their kids, especially single mothers. It doesnt mean she wont love u especially if you're serious.

emmydee:

single motherhood is not a crime. look at d personality. if she's someone u really like, then u go ahead. if not, pls move on and let her b.
Most single mothers didnt become single mothers by choice.
Mothers have special love for their kids, especially single mothers. It doesnt mean she wont love u especially if your serious.

True dat, but the woman has to be ready too to share love and make sure the kid(s) are ready to have another man in their lives

emmydee:

single motherhood is not a crime. look at d personality. if she's someone u really like, then u go ahead. if not, pls move on and let her b.
Most single mothers didnt become single mothers by choice.
Mothers have special love for their kids, especially single mothers. It doesnt mean she wont love u especially if your serious.

The statement in bold from the quote above is not necessarily true. Often at times, the opposite may be the case to that statement. In subject matters like this, a general statement to embrace all who find themselves in it, does not augur well with the matter. As there is the subject of relativity amongst peeps to the matter.

@ Pataki

For a single mother, in most cases, she is d only person d child has on this earth, she as a mother understands that and needs to show love to d child by default. However, if the guy now comes in, he needs to be very sure wat he wants in that relationship. most ladies in that category want to get married as soon as they can. so, if ur dating a single mother, u need to talk things out wit her as soon as u get into d relationship. that will enable her know how to handle her time between you and d child/children.

My argument is that since you know she's a single mother, decide for ur self wat u want in d relationship as quickly as possible, it's not d type of relationship you play with. The kid/s may start calling u daddy even b4 u know it, cos they need to have a daddy too. so, it's a very complex affair, if you dont want to marry her, dont go deep and dont stay long, and dont raise her hope, just gerrrrraaaout!

Its difficult enough when you marry and are both fresh; getting involved with someone who is already entangled in a web somewhere else only conplicates things, in my opinion.

JustGood:

Its difficult enough when you marry and are both fresh; getting involved with someone who is already entangled in a web somewhere else only conplicates things, in my opinion.

Difficult, however, with the right woman, it can be made easy, and i think depends on how the man starts off too with the kid(s)

As if marrying women who have no children is a guaranty of happiness.

wbb

spoilt:

As if marrying women who have no children is a guaranty of happiness.

Tell them jare, it is about abt individual and not to generalize.

hmm marry am now if u love am

candylips:

hmm marry am now if u love am

tell them jare

candylips:

hmm marry am now if u love am

and come back to tell us stories about how his/her other children are behaving towards you or how he/she is putting the interests of the other person's children above you and yours?

Love alone is not what sustains a marriage. . .

JustGood:

and come back to tell us stories about how his/her other children are behaving towards you or how he/she is putting the interests of the other person's children above you and yours?

Love alone is not what sustains a marriage. . .

True, but we shd not write off women with kids.
Some are more reliable than a woman with no kids.

it depends but many things have disadvantages sha

I'd have gone with the bash-baby-mamas brigade if I hadnt noticed Nigerian men tend to throw all this nitpicking out the window the minute they see a non-Nigerian woman.

fitting in into the new family and compatibility with the kids for some.

@poster just because a woman has a child does not mean she was inlove with him. with as previlant as one night stands and friends with benifits are here i would think the oposite would be true. there is always the posiblity the child is a product of a rape.

women with children already tend to be much pickier when finding a husband then those without

I cant marry someone with a child

^^^ why

^^u know nao

Kunbee:

^^u know nao

Time will tell.

Abi ooo but i seriously doubt

doubting thomas