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I Told My Hubby To Stop Using My Money.am I Wrong? - Family (4) - Nairaland

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Re: I Told My Hubby To Stop Using My Money.am I Wrong? by Ajayilomo: 12:49am On Jul 20, 2015
Sorry about this woman, issue like this have even broke down some relationships. I will say a sincere financial understanding and open communication is lacking here esp when it comes to the kind of project you expend on from time to time. Remain open and loyal to him. He's your husband and the head of the family while you do all you can to support your family also let him give attention to his spending. You could consider drawing up a budget and be strict with it. Your husband is not a bad person may be you are only looking at his financial recklessness- he needs a self control on the matter of spending. Always encourage him to set priority and all of this you must do in the spirit of mildness. Don't also forget that what he borrowed for is for the benefit of the family. Please discuss matter out from time to time because the bible say 'there is a great achievement in the multitude of counselor'- that's only true if there is good communication

2 Likes

Re: I Told My Hubby To Stop Using My Money.am I Wrong? by ivyT(f): 12:52am On Jul 20, 2015
Certifiedboss:


This is a marrie woman seeking advise concerning her home affairs and not just a girlfriend seeking your opinion about her relationship . You should learn to pay attention to situation before choosing words you use . You can't just jump on you phone to tell a married woman "Men ain't worth it " when she's seeking advise concerning her husband . Little things send ideas to people's mind . Be a home builder and not a home breaker . It will help you go a long way

U r ryt_I stick with my opinions nd y should stick to urs
Re: I Told My Hubby To Stop Using My Money.am I Wrong? by ivyT(f): 12:53am On Jul 20, 2015
gentl:

Speak for yourself alone..all men ain't the same..


Exactly_I spoke for myself undecided
gentl:

Speak for yourself alone..all men ain't the same..


Exactly_I spoke for myself
Re: I Told My Hubby To Stop Using My Money.am I Wrong? by sunkoye: 12:56am On Jul 20, 2015
Madam ur actions are very right but the way u apply it could make it worst decision in ur relationship. You need wisdom here. Please dont listen to pple advocating fire brigade approach to the issue. u know ur hubby more than all. the right button u ve always pressed that delivers can still be harnessed with wisdom.

Pls dont forget to pray about it too oo.
Re: I Told My Hubby To Stop Using My Money.am I Wrong? by Nobody: 1:00am On Jul 20, 2015
The peeps who lent him money to foot the medical bills may have asked "weren't U aware, she was pregnant?" lipsrsealed
How a MAN would gladly take money from his wife, severally/habitually beats me sad moreso, a wife that foots bills without holding back. Yet he sees no need to support her educational pursuit undecided
Op, I know U are toughie, make me proud angry

1 Like

Re: I Told My Hubby To Stop Using My Money.am I Wrong? by sunkoye: 1:01am On Jul 20, 2015
PubLlcEnemy:


You sound like a good wife. Pls keep it up.

You did the right thing in tellin him how you feel... But it all boils down to how you put it to him. I hope you were polite enuff becos he might just say "OK " but within him, he may not be very happy. So if you think you weren't polite enuff pls just go back and beg him to make him understand how much ur education means to you... But you should be firm on not just ur finances but the entire finance of the house since you said he spends money as he sees it. You are the wife and should be in control of the finaces becos if thing go south you will all suffer it.
one of the best post here.

eemm.. but.this ur moniker ehn; almost made me skipped wisdom here. cheesy
Re: I Told My Hubby To Stop Using My Money.am I Wrong? by ivyT(f): 1:02am On Jul 20, 2015
kilokeys:
u r a madt foooo*coughs*oooll Ur father and brother and future son aint gonna be worth anything

U ain't a man yet
I go soon arrange boys wey go fuckkk ur smelly yansh..
Re: I Told My Hubby To Stop Using My Money.am I Wrong? by Nobody: 1:11am On Jul 20, 2015
I'd hv loved to hear d huzby's side of tha story to b able to see the whole picture. Stemming from ya story anyway, I don't think u came out late to tell hm 'bout the credit yo company paid yu. Twas jas a day interval... Facing the main issue anyway, Yu hv to mk sure u nd yur man gets into a fight so yu both might blurt out all thoughts you been stomaching so you both might know your deficiences. Aftr which, yu go back to him swallowing yo ego and ask him what his plans are or what he thinks can be done to balance things up from there can solutions be birthed for this particular issue and Infact issues you haven't paid cognizance to or aint even aware exsts.
Re: I Told My Hubby To Stop Using My Money.am I Wrong? by Nobody: 1:15am On Jul 20, 2015
ivyT:



U ain't a man yet

I go soon arrange boys wey go fuckkk ur smelly yansh..
Lol. Makes me remember this line from is it lauryn hill now? ; opinions are like a s s h o l e s and most of 'em stink!...that your opinion can land u in jail. #homosexuality is a crime in Naija
Re: I Told My Hubby To Stop Using My Money.am I Wrong? by ferhyntorlah(f): 1:18am On Jul 20, 2015
Toks2008:


Im so sorry to use this word.

You are a foolish woman for ever agreeing to this nonsense and he must be a jerk to abuse a rare privilege from the few foolish women like you.

Im so sorry for my choice of words but this is indeed a foolish act only done by foolish people who think they are in love.

I just hope this does not break your marriage.

This is coming from a man? Wow!
I'm impressed.
Very well said Sir.
If it were a woman, hell would be let loosed!

Favorofgod, your husband will put you all in trouble one day. Is he even planning his retirement? It isn't too early to start!

Come to think of it, what if one of you were sacked (GOD forbid), what will you guys fall back on? Keep repeating the cycle of borrowing to survive?

I can see you are the financially prudent one, so the ball is in your court madam to act wisely. Must he celebrate an elaborate baby dedication? What happened to cutting one's coat according to one's MATERIAL?

Someone close to me lectured me some days ago. He said all humans are created to be spenders but only A FEW are savers!

He needs to prioritise his spending and you should be involved.

He needs TOUGH LOVE and not PITY PITY LOVE.

1 Like

Re: I Told My Hubby To Stop Using My Money.am I Wrong? by Lovechyld101(m): 1:19am On Jul 20, 2015
My Advice is to Create a New account without an atm specifically for your schooling/Masters then you keep the other one more like a Joint account your husband is a Big spender I won't blame him.

1 Like

Re: I Told My Hubby To Stop Using My Money.am I Wrong? by Nobody: 1:28am On Jul 20, 2015
ferhyntorlah:


This is coming from a man? Wow!
I'm impressed.
Very well said Sir.
If it were a woman, hell would be let loosed!

Favorofgod, your husband will put you all in trouble one day. Is he even planning his retirement? It isn't too early to start!

Come to think of it, what if one of you were sacked (GOD forbid), what will you guys fall back on? Keep repeating the cycle of borrowing to survive?

I can see you are the financially prudent one, so the ball is in your court madam to act wisely. Must he celebrate an elaborate baby dedication? What happened to cutting one's coat according to one's MATERIAL?

Someone close to me lectured me some days ago. He said all humans are created to be spenders but only A FEW are savers!

He needs to prioritise his spending and you should be involved.

He needs TOUGH LOVE and not PITY PITY LOVE.

Re: I Told My Hubby To Stop Using My Money.am I Wrong? by biggz82: 1:28am On Jul 20, 2015
Open a new account or change ur pin. He does not want u 2 b higher dan him wen it comes 2 education.
Re: I Told My Hubby To Stop Using My Money.am I Wrong? by ivyT(f): 1:32am On Jul 20, 2015
Sabrwahaqqo:

Lol. Makes me remember this line from is it lauryn hill now? ; opinions are like a s s h o l e s and most of 'em stink!...that your opinion can land u in jail. #homosexuality is a crime in Naija


who is dis one?
Re: I Told My Hubby To Stop Using My Money.am I Wrong? by naijaboiy: 1:36am On Jul 20, 2015
ivyT:
U did d right thing nd stand ur ground.Finances causes alot of problem_iv witnessed it

am nt been bias_but MenAintWorthIt,
This is what happens when a teenage girl that is still keeping numerous boyfriends jumps on a thread bordering on marriage to comment.

Such dumbness! sad

1 Like

Re: I Told My Hubby To Stop Using My Money.am I Wrong? by kilokeys(m): 1:37am On Jul 20, 2015
ivyT:



U ain't a man yet

I go soon arrange boys wey go fuckkk ur smelly yansh..
cheesy
Chai. I don jam
Re: I Told My Hubby To Stop Using My Money.am I Wrong? by Nobody: 1:38am On Jul 20, 2015
ivyT:


who is dis one?
Your dad's elder brother.
Re: I Told My Hubby To Stop Using My Money.am I Wrong? by Nobody: 1:40am On Jul 20, 2015
naijaboiy:

This is what happens when a teenage girl that is still keeping numerous boyfriends jumps on a thread bordering on marriage to comment.

Such dumbness! sad
Nigga, you're a genius!
Re: I Told My Hubby To Stop Using My Money.am I Wrong? by ivyT(f): 1:44am On Jul 20, 2015
Sabrwahaqqo:
Your dad's elder brother.
tufia! ewu nairaland
Re: I Told My Hubby To Stop Using My Money.am I Wrong? by naijaboiy: 1:44am On Jul 20, 2015
enoqueen:
One of the many mistakes we women make is allowing our men know that we av money.

U did not do anything wrong and let it remain so even after paying ur fees.
I don't really understand. Are you saying you shouldn't let your man know you have money when he needs it badly?

Enlighten me please.

enoqueen:
When men sees money with us, they will be coming up with different project that they cannot do alone just to make sure that we spend what we av.

How did you actually come up with this? Please explain.

From what i'm reading up there its like you're saying you can spend your man's money but he shouldn't touch yours when he's in need.

Because he will "finish it"
Re: I Told My Hubby To Stop Using My Money.am I Wrong? by Nobody: 1:44am On Jul 20, 2015
Toks2008:


Unfortunately that was not an advice but a conclusive remark.

Do you know the number of marriages that have broken down as a result of this similar case?

I am a marriage counsilor and i dont mix words when i talk to couples.My marriage collapsed due to money issues and my ex could not cope with the sudden change of events.

The second factor that breaks up marriage is money after infidelity and trust me,the op has foolishly put herself in pertetual bondage.

Love and personal finance are very parallel. Transparency YES,joint account NO,unhindered access to withdraw from partners account,HELL NO. sharing of financial responsibility HELL NO but should be left at the discretion of the lady.

I guess many people need to pass through lots of counseling before getting married.


Trust me,the op has two options,to continue with this absurdity or stop and break her marriage.

Too sad.
Lol. Marriage councillor indeed.

1 Like

Re: I Told My Hubby To Stop Using My Money.am I Wrong? by ivyT(f): 1:45am On Jul 20, 2015
kilokeys:
cheesy Chai. I don jam
wink
kilokeys:
cheesy Chai. I don jam
Re: I Told My Hubby To Stop Using My Money.am I Wrong? by Nobody: 1:46am On Jul 20, 2015
ivyT:

tufia! ewu nairaland
And she starts speaking in tongues
Re: I Told My Hubby To Stop Using My Money.am I Wrong? by ivyT(f): 1:47am On Jul 20, 2015
naijaboiy:

This is what happens when a teenage girl that is still keeping numerous boyfriends jumps on a thread bordering on marriage to comment.

Such dumbness! sad


u came too late





*shiits on ur head*

1 Like

Re: I Told My Hubby To Stop Using My Money.am I Wrong? by cmobile: 1:48am On Jul 20, 2015
Don't cut your husband off entirely. Finance is the bed in marriage. Explain to him and tell him how much you will like to keep for your project monthly and how much you will like him to be using from it. God make men to have a dominating spirit, if your husband sees that he can no longer tell you what to do, he may start withdrawing from you gradually. Wisdom and patience is needed to make marriage successful. In our generation especially Africans, most women are still very attached to their families, especially because of this poverty problem, their families members always look yp to the successful one whether male or female. You need wisdom to know when to help your own family where you are coming from. Whatever you are doing carry your husband along.










so as not to

1 Like

Re: I Told My Hubby To Stop Using My Money.am I Wrong? by Nobody: 1:50am On Jul 20, 2015
I don't involve in husband and wife matter.But I must say this since you came public.open another savings account. Maybe he doesn't want your progress.My opinion.op,don't see me as a home wrecker o.

1 Like

Re: I Told My Hubby To Stop Using My Money.am I Wrong? by no1madman(m): 1:50am On Jul 20, 2015
But. .
Re: I Told My Hubby To Stop Using My Money.am I Wrong? by TheUmmah: 1:54am On Jul 20, 2015
grin WOMAN? And their own FINANCES? It seems most of the guys wey dey hia na learners? Any advice sent their way as regards cash na voicemail! No need!

1 Like

Re: I Told My Hubby To Stop Using My Money.am I Wrong? by OLUJOSHINS(m): 1:59am On Jul 20, 2015
ivyT:
MenAintWorthIt,
in time dearie, U will realise the fact that all men are not the same

1 Like 1 Share

Re: I Told My Hubby To Stop Using My Money.am I Wrong? by IYADARA(f): 2:16am On Jul 20, 2015
Now I know am not alone in dis situation....op I hope u will do as u ve said.....I did s extra savings too but eventually got all out ....I hate when my acct is red but wat can I do? Hummmm...if u can Stans by ur decision then I must commend u
Re: I Told My Hubby To Stop Using My Money.am I Wrong? by chy22(m): 2:18am On Jul 20, 2015
Did I hear pounds? I assume you live in England

Lets assume for one moment your have quite a lot of money, then you open a new account or be complete blunt like you are told on this forum and then he gets very angry or decides to complete his evil agenda like people on this forum make your husband out to be. He will get a divorce right?, when he does, that money will be shared equally! is it not? then you would have ruined your marriage and lost 50% of your money right?

Clearly you knew his potentials and his capabilities before you married him, so don't come on a public forum to open a discussion that should be for two (wife and husband). you two are one, if you agree to study then you two should sort it out, while you study if there are kids he should be the one to take care of them, hence while it is called marriage. Woman go home to your husband smiley

My one kobo.

2 Likes

Re: I Told My Hubby To Stop Using My Money.am I Wrong? by Brugo(m): 2:39am On Jul 20, 2015
.





So it's cool for a wife to blow her husband's money cos it's expendable but he can't touch hers cos she has great plans.

Interesting. Anyway, there are 2 sides to a coin.




.

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