GreenWhiteGreen:
Y'all indeed funny. This is a made up story. You can't truly be in such situation and don't know what to do or come online to seek advice from random people. Engineers are smart folks, not this dumba##.

lookingbuoy:
Hmm...
You are right. I'm actually more smitten by the unemployed lady. But i dont like her unemployed situation. And she also comes off as not so independent. The other lady is as pretty, way more independent (perhaps totally), holds her on and carries herself well. She has most things I've fantasized about my woman having, only my relationship with her is not as boundless as what i have with the unemployed lady.
I believe i can comfortably take care of the home with the unemployed one. However, i don't like her unemployed situation one bit.

lookingbuoy:

My friendship with the unemployed one is so unfettered and we goof around a lot. It's like two children playing in the sand, and i kinda like that. She's hoping that I'll ask her out formally, but i don't like her unemployed situation.

My friendship with the independent one is kinda rigid and formal. We talk, gist, go to dinner dates, but hardly joke around. We do joke around sometimes though.

And it seems i want what both of them have: i want the freedom i get with the other lady and the independence i get with the other

lookingbuoy:
I have a little problem and need some advice on it:

I've got a girl I like. We met at nysc and got along really good. Even today i still remember the first day i saw her. She studied psychology and even though I'm an engineer we could relate and talk a lot about her subject, as I read a lot and kinda have read much on psychology. After nysc we still kept in touch and continued to talk even though i never asked her out formally. Soon i got a job away from her. Our talking continued on phone.

While out of Nigeria on training, I met another lady. She's just as pretty as the other one, but has a great job and is a confident woman. The other girl is still searching for a job; and her psychology degree is no help. I have a great job myself and i earn seven digits in naira per month. The new girl also works with an oil form and earns very well. We have got along these past few months and I really have fun talking to her and hanging out.

I have always wanted an independent woman as a wife, a woman who can stand by herself and who has prospects for a huge career. I'm career-minded myself. But now, I'm really confused who to plan my life with and settle down with as a partner: this independent lady who I believe I like or the other unemployed lady who I seem to have a more relaxed, longer friendship with.

Note: I've not asked any of them out formally. Please help.

UjSizzle:

Seriously his salary package was the only interesting thing about his post.
I think he works with an oil firm since he said the other girl 'also works with an oil firm' but 7 digits monthly? Damn. I'd love to know his job description abeg.

Harbosede02:
I never knew there was a theory that states that once an unemployed is forever an unemployed.... Pls ur thinking faculty is so so annoying.... So becos the other lady is jobless makes her less eligible to be ur wife??


Guys!!!!

Tufanja:
Looking at the answers of the OP, he better opt for the psychology-girl, that's the cheapest option, as he is gonna need lifelong psychological counseling on how to follow his heart. She wont be jobless one minute.

#wont mind if both girls turn him down when he has finally made up his mind, let him come back for advice then

The broke girl is still in touch with you cos you gat money. Don't date her. If you two were unemployed she would have stopped keeping in touch long ago.

Stay away from broke girls. Their loyalty is to the money.

My opinion

Harbosede02:
I never knew there was a theory that states that once an unemployed is forever an unemployed.... Pls ur thinking faculty is so so annoying.... So becos the other lady is jobless makes her less eligible to be ur wife??


Guys!!!!

Tufanja:
Looking at the answers of the OP, he better opt for the psychology-girl, that's the cheapest option, as he is gonna need lifelong psychological counseling on how to follow his heart. She wont be jobless one minute.

#wont mind if both girls turn him down when he has finally made up his mind, let him come back for advice then

lookingbuoy:

Hmmm... good advice. Thanks. But if the other one remains unemployed, I wouldn't like that.

kathykathy:
weigh dem on a scale,,d one dat weigh's more has more potential..period

Sweetlemon:
I can just imagine how people (esp guys) would have bashed the op is he was female. Imagine! I don't blame people who don't believe his salary figure. Most guys earning that much make sexual compartiblity and personality more important in their choice of a life partner than independence. Unless of course the gold diggers who are searching for more gold to add to what they already have.
So many male gold diggers prowling about the whole place these days. Both the poor ones and the rich ones.... Oma se o!

lookingbuoy:

My friendship with the unemployed one is so unfettered and we goof around a lot. It's like two children playing in the sand, and i kinda like that. She's hoping that I'll ask her out formally, but i don't like her unemployed situation.

My friendship with the independent one is kinda rigid and formal. We talk, gist, go to dinner dates, but hardly joke around. We do joke around sometimes though.

And it seems i want what both of them have: i want the freedom i get with the other lady and the independence i get with the other

lookingbuoy:
I have a little problem and need some advice on it:

I've got a girl I like. We met at nysc and got along really good. Even today i still remember the first day i saw her. She studied psychology and even though I'm an engineer we could relate and talk a lot about her subject, as I read a lot and kinda have read much on psychology. After nysc we still kept in touch and continued to talk even though i never asked her out formally. Soon i got a job away from her. Our talking continued on phone.

While out of Nigeria on training, I met another lady. She's just as pretty as the other one, but has a great job and is a confident woman. The other girl is still searching for a job; and her psychology degree is no help. I have a great job myself and i earn seven digits in naira per month. The new girl also works with an oil form and earns very well. We have got along these past few months and I really have fun talking to her and hanging out.

I have always wanted an independent woman as a wife, a woman who can stand by herself and who has prospects for a huge career. I'm career-minded myself. But now, I'm really confused who to plan my life with and settle down with as a partner: this independent lady who I believe I like or the other unemployed lady who I seem to have a more relaxed, longer friendship with.

Note: I've not asked any of them out formally. Please help.

lookingbuoy:
I have a little problem and need some advice on it:

I've got a girl I like. We met at nysc and got along really good. Even today i still remember the first day i saw her. She studied psychology and even though I'm an engineer we could relate and talk a lot about her subject, as I read a lot and kinda have read much on psychology. After nysc we still kept in touch and continued to talk even though i never asked her out formally. Soon i got a job away from her. Our talking continued on phone.

While out of Nigeria on training, I met another lady. She's just as pretty as the other one, but has a great job and is a confident woman. The other girl is still searching for a job; and her psychology degree is no help. I have a great job myself and i earn seven digits in naira per month. The new girl also works with an oil form and earns very well. We have got along these past few months and I really have fun talking to her and hanging out.

I have always wanted an independent woman as a wife, a woman who can stand by herself and who has prospects for a huge career. I'm career-minded myself. But now, I'm really confused who to plan my life with and settle down with as a partner: this independent lady who I believe I like or the other unemployed lady who I seem to have a more relaxed, longer friendship with.

Note: I've not asked any of them out formally. Please help.

Slimzjoe:
Marry the one with the bigger Br3ast

davidadenrele:
Hello,

I read your through your write-up and i must confess, i admire your courage of asking for advice, from nairalanders, i don't want to be too spiritual because there have been many suggestion and advices from other intelligent readers the issue of life partner is not something you have to throw up in a public domain as if you are screening ministerial nominess before the honourable Senate, choosen a right or wrong choices could either make you or mar you, not only make or may you,but could even distorted your destiny God forbid!!!

May, i ask if you are a christian or a Muslim May also ask if you if your both parents are still very much alive?? if you your answer is "yes" please go to them for advice the words of elders are words of wisdom not will they advise they will guide in the right path as said earlier that i don't want to be too spiritual or old fashioned please go to your pastor or alfas let them pray with you and guide you in prayers without God all things are possible if you are believer like me i will advise you to go down on your knees talk to God in prayer ask for his guidance ask for a sign choosing Lady A or B by sentiments, beauty or traits, could leads you to heathache, tears and regrets according a particular Christian hymn that says " we suffers so much in loss and pain because we refuse to put our problems in prayer before God what makes you think the lady working in the oil company with all the money and independence will grant you a lifetime happiness?? and what also gives you an assurance that the other without job today won't end up been much more successful than you could ever imagine ?? the only person that would have an answer to all this is God seconded by parents guiding you in the right path to take pls don't be confused be of good courage seek advice from your parents and go to God in prayer.

All the best.

shozillo:


My Big Brother,U r hereby Crowned d Best Liar of 2015..

U earn 1Million Every Month...please Ow many years of Experience do u have?
(bearing in mind d drop of crude oil prices in d Intl Market)

sugah:


Then you should do something about her "unemployed situation". You know not all relationships should lead to marriage. Relationships should be about what you can offer to the next person, not really what you want from them. If you have the wherewithal to empower her (a lil from your seven figure salary), you should do that. Empowerment doesn't necessarily have to be about giving her money. While she is waiting to be employed, does she have any passions that can fetch some form of income from? Have you talked her into getting anymore educational qualifications that would give her an edge against the other millions of graduates being churned out from schools? Does she have a business plan that you can finance? You should help her.
Even if she doesn't end up being as financially independent as you want her to be and end up marrying the other broad, she would never forget you and how you touched her life(as long as sex isnt involved).

Jamean:


I can perceive that your major reservation with MzPsychology degree is the fact that she has no job. So what have you done about her unemployment situation?
Is it only women that are advised to build their own man? Have you considered the implications of getting hooked with a lady you are really formal with.

Oftentimes the real troubles in life are the things that never crossed our worried mind.

You are not even giving consideration to what you feel for them, their achievements is overshadowing that. The rich marry the rich and the strata in the society remains same. In Kachis.barbie's voice "don't marry for money but go to where the rich are and marry for love"


Lalasticlala please move this to FP for an intelligent debate.

Regards

lookingbuoy:
Hmm...
You are right. I'm actually more smitten by the unemployed lady. But i dont like her unemployed situation. And she also comes off as not so independent. The other lady is as pretty, way more independent (perhaps totally), holds her on and carries herself well. She has most things I've fantasized about my woman having, only my relationship with her is not as boundless as what i have with the unemployed lady.
I believe i can comfortably take care of the home with the unemployed one. However, i don't like her unemployed situation one bit.