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Which Girl Do I Decide On? - Romance (7) - Nairaland

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Re: Which Girl Do I Decide On? by sawhite: 1:05am On Oct 17, 2015
Harbosede02:
can u pls say some ladies!!I can marry an unemployed hardworking guy bt wat I will never settle for is an unemployed lazy nigga.

Unemployment isn't a permanent tin abeg
na so we dey hear am,how can u say u can marry an unemployed dude,aunty plz rethink
Re: Which Girl Do I Decide On? by crackhouse(m): 1:25am On Oct 17, 2015
lookingbuoy:
Hmm...
You are right. I'm actually more smitten by the unemployed lady. But i dont like her unemployed situation. And she also comes off as not so independent. The other lady is as pretty, way more independent (perhaps totally), holds her on and carries herself well. She has most things I've fantasized about my woman having, only my relationship with her is not as boundless as what i have with the unemployed lady.
I believe i can comfortably take care of the home with the unemployed one. However, i don't like her unemployed situation one bit.
then make her self employed since u have the money. If u are sure u make 7 digits monthly that means u earn nothing less than 1 000 000 so money shouldn't be a problem. Open a business for her to move on from there unless u are not telling us the truth. It is not compulsory that she must work for sb. Take the advice and stop disturbing people's peace here.

1 Like

Re: Which Girl Do I Decide On? by tpiander: 1:32am On Oct 17, 2015
don't you have friends and relatives you can ask?

or is this a phony thread.
Re: Which Girl Do I Decide On? by shozillo(m): 1:33am On Oct 17, 2015
sameolg616:

chief accountant....is that the issue....whether he earns kobos in 12 digits,,that aint ur problem...
guest u dont know people that earn a million in a month..even some yahoo boys do talkless oil and gas..
the dude just having probs deciding

lolz. U sound Naive
have u worked in any paid employment b4?
If u have which i doubt ,ow many years have u done?

D yahoo yahoo(illegal biz) u r even talking about..if u have an clue abt business , U would know Earnings frm Bizness Flutuates(up n down!)..nt 2 talk of d 1 dat depends on maga...

Sm1 just finish service..Earning 1M is a pure lie.Think!!!
Re: Which Girl Do I Decide On? by Peebles23(f): 1:46am On Oct 17, 2015
lookingbuoy:

Hmmm... good advice. Thanks. But if the other one remains unemployed, I wouldn't like that.


As if she won't eventually get a job are u GOD? There's nothing as living with a happy woman ooo. U know the saying HAPPY WIFE HAPPY LIFE
Re: Which Girl Do I Decide On? by Nobody: 1:46am On Oct 17, 2015
Acidosis:
I'm only interested in your salary package


Sir you earn 7 digits monthly? When did you finish nysc again?
I'll use this to respond to the queries about my pay. Naturally, I wouldn't like to be drawn into this discussion, as it's of no issue. At the same time, I don't think it'll get to the point where I'll have to post my payslip here to defend my claims.
However, if you had good information about the international upstream industry, you'd know that one can indeed earn 7 digits monthly even as a trainee. Perhaps you won't know because you don't work in this industry. But I'm pretty confident a lot of those who work for upstream multinationals in different capacities will know this, even if some of these don't earn this amount.

Again, I know where my dice will fall with these ladies. Though I may not have "formally" asked them out already, I'm very sure they both want to date me. I don't have to explain that to everyone. I know that.

Lastly, I'd like to thank those who have taken out time to respond to my post with their pieces of advice. Thanks.
Not that I appreciate my situation getting out there and being peddled around, but I guess that's the price I should be willing to pay for wanting some more advice.

1 Like

Re: Which Girl Do I Decide On? by ogaprime(m): 1:52am On Oct 17, 2015
alexistaiwo:
seven digits? That is a million and u aren't sure who to date. I smell lies. hit like if you agree with me that this story is fake

Maybe op dey do like pauliponpo for inside "lagos na wah" film
Re: Which Girl Do I Decide On? by xp17(m): 2:01am On Oct 17, 2015
Harbosede02:
I never knew there was a theory that states that once an unemployed is forever an unemployed.... Pls ur thinking faculty is so so annoying.... So becos the other lady is jobless makes her less eligible to be ur wife??


Guys!!!! angry
the same way you'd leave a broke guy for the flashy one. Once a broke guy ain't gonna be broke forever. Before you jump into conclusion, always endeavour to place yourself in the reverse situation.
Re: Which Girl Do I Decide On? by sameolg616(m): 2:19am On Oct 17, 2015
shozillo:


lolz. U sound Naive
have u worked in any paid employment b4?
If u have which i doubt ,ow many years have u done?

D yahoo yahoo(illegal biz) u r even talking about..if u have an clue abt business , U would know Earnings frm Bizness Flutuates(up n down!)..nt 2 talk of d 1 dat depends on maga...

Sm1 just finish service..Earning 1M is a pure lie.Think!!!
u sound like those bitter grade 14 civil servants....i bet ur running a profile check on this dude already(if u find his number ,i advise u use tru caller to look him up before u proceed to google )lol
just cuz u dont know those u earn such or u probably dont doesnt meant they dont exist....
i know some...besides,the guy may be a robber,ritualist or successful business guy....
Re: Which Girl Do I Decide On? by Tashaamania(f): 2:22am On Oct 17, 2015
xp17:
the same way you'd leave a broke guy for the flashy one. Once a broke guy ain't gonna be broke forever. Before you jump into conclusion, always endeavour to place yourself in the reverse situation.
HBD cheesy tongue
Re: Which Girl Do I Decide On? by stanvesco(m): 2:56am On Oct 17, 2015
lookingbuoy:
I have a little problem and need some advice on it:

I've got a girl I like. We met at nysc and got along really good. Even today i still remember the first day i saw her. She studied psychology and even though I'm an engineer we could relate and talk a lot about her subject, as I read a lot and kinda have read much on psychology. After nysc we still kept in touch and continued to talk even though i never asked her out formally. Soon i got a job away from her. Our talking continued on phone.

While out of Nigeria on training, I met another lady. She's just as pretty as the other one, but has a great job and is a confident woman. The other girl is still searching for a job; and her psychology degree is no help. I have a great job myself and i earn seven digits in naira per month. The new girl also works with an oil form and earns very well. We have got along these past few months and I really have fun talking to her and hanging out.

I have always wanted an independent woman as a wife, a woman who can stand by herself and who has prospects for a huge career. I'm career-minded myself. But now, I'm really confused who to plan my life with and settle down with as a partner: this independent lady who I believe I like or the other unemployed lady who I seem to have a more relaxed, longer friendship with.

Note: I've not asked any of them out formally. Please help.

u may just be a butterfly callin himself a bird...
Bro go and ask both out 1st...u may just be a friend to both ladies

1 Like

Re: Which Girl Do I Decide On? by ngona(f): 3:33am On Oct 17, 2015
lookingbuoy:

My friendship with the unemployed one is so unfettered and we goof around a lot. It's like two children playing in the sand, and i kinda like that. She's hoping that I'll ask her out formally, but i don't like her unemployed situation.

My friendship with the independent one is kinda rigid and formal. We talk, gist, go to dinner dates, but hardly joke around. We do joke around sometimes though.

And it seems i want what both of them have: i want the freedom i get with the other lady and the independence i get with the other
I think the one you play around with is more of a friend than the one you ar formal with. At a point in marriage those little little jokes and tease keep you going. She does not have a job now does not mean she won't have a job for life.
Re: Which Girl Do I Decide On? by Bollinger(m): 5:03am On Oct 17, 2015
Neither. Marriage ain't no joke. If he's confused as to who to marry, then he shouldn't. You need to somewhat sure before you jump into the shark infested pool of marriage.

1 Like

Re: Which Girl Do I Decide On? by Acidosis(m): 5:10am On Oct 17, 2015
lookingbuoy:

I'll use this to respond to the queries about my pay. Naturally, I wouldn't like to be drawn into this discussion, as it's of no issue. At the same time, I don't think it'll get to the point where I'll have to post my payslip here to defend my claims.
However, if you had good information about the international upstream industry, you'd know that one can indeed earn 7 digits monthly even as a trainee. Perhaps you won't know because you don't work in this industry. But I'm pretty confident a lot of those who work for upstream multinationals in different capacities will know this, even if some of these don't earn this amount.

Again, I know where my dice will fall with these ladies. Though I may not have "formally" asked them out already, I'm very sure they both want to date me. I don't have to explain that to everyone. I know that.

Lastly, I'd like to thank those who have taken out time to respond to my post with their pieces of advice. Thanks.
Not that I appreciate my situation getting out there and being peddled around, but I guess that's the price I should be willing to pay for wanting some more advice.

Nice one, bro. Thanks for the enlightenment.

In my own opinion, if career/money/independence is going to be an issue, I'd advise you ignore the nysc friend. Not too many people earn good salaries in Nigeria. She's not going to be jobless forever, but some employed folks and practicing business women don't earn your 1 month salary in 12 months. You actually earn much more than University Vice Chancellors.

So don't live in the hope that she'll one day earn fat salary. The problem has little/nothing to do with psychology though. There are some who studied your kind of course but earn peanut, some are jobless as well.

If truly you admire the independent lady, please prepare your proposal as soon as possible. She may actually be considering other guys, so don't waste any more time.

More so, do you believe in dreams? Spirituality? Dream is the only link between the known and the unknown. The day I dreamt about my JAMB score a day before it was released, I stopped joking with dreams/visions.
Some months back I attended an interview and I was very certain I was going to get the job because I found myself in the firm in my dream a week before the interview date (I later rejected the offer though). So dreams will unfold things we ordinarily don't know about the future.


All the best bro

1 Like

Re: Which Girl Do I Decide On? by Nobody: 5:26am On Oct 17, 2015
lookingbuoy:

My friendship with the unemployed one is so unfettered and we goof around a lot. It's like two children playing in the sand, and i kinda like that. She's hoping that I'll ask her out formally, but i don't like her unemployed situation.

My friendship with the independent one is kinda rigid and formal. We talk, gist, go to dinner dates, but hardly joke around. We do joke around sometimes though.

And it seems i want what both of them have: i want the freedom i get with the other lady and the independence i get with the other
Will the unemployed one remain unemployed forever?

Marry your friend.
Re: Which Girl Do I Decide On? by Nobody: 5:29am On Oct 17, 2015
No famzing

2 Likes

Re: Which Girl Do I Decide On? by xp17(m): 5:30am On Oct 17, 2015
Tashaamania:
HBD cheesy tongue
gratitude smiley

1 Like

Re: Which Girl Do I Decide On? by murash: 5:33am On Oct 17, 2015
Bro. The best I think you can do is to 4get the matter of unemployment, try to study both of them well to know the one that have quality of good wife, cos life after marriage its another thing entirely

1 Like

Re: Which Girl Do I Decide On? by Nobody: 5:37am On Oct 17, 2015
smiley
Re: Which Girl Do I Decide On? by DTOBS(m): 5:44am On Oct 17, 2015
lookingbuoy:

My friendship with the unemployed one is so unfettered and we goof around a lot. It's like two children playing in the sand, and i kinda like that. She's hoping that I'll ask her out formally, but i don't like her unemployed situation.

My friendship with the independent one is kinda rigid and formal. We talk, gist, go to dinner dates, but hardly joke around. We do joke around sometimes though.

And it seems i want what both of them have: i want the freedom i get with the other lady and the independence i get with the other
The problem with you is that u don't want to spend on the one that's yet to gain employment and that's why you are concern about her independency and dependency factor. and for the other lady that's dependent, she might probably do not have the euphoria and the charisma that the other lady possess when you re around her....
way forward: You need to ask yourself some questions that only can provide answers to,
1.Am I ready for this? 2.what do I want in a lady? 3. Among these two,who possess the quality? 4. What is going to be my commitment to my partner financial? 5. am I ready for any type of relationship? be it long distance or short distance?
If you're able to answer this question to urself truthfully,I bet it with you that you won't loose a sleep over deciding on who to choose!
#gracias

1 Like

Re: Which Girl Do I Decide On? by vjsmiles: 5:59am On Oct 17, 2015
ivyy:



Did you angry
wink


[size=14pt] pm me that number smiley [/size]
Re: Which Girl Do I Decide On? by jaybee3(m): 6:00am On Oct 17, 2015
You should marry the one you are most comfortable with

If you earn as much as you've claimed then simply empower the one you seem to have much fun with.
Her being empowered will stimulate and forcefully reveal her independent mindset which in turn will almost certainly increase your affection towards her.

Money becomes important in marriages when it's in short supply so it shouldn't be a deciding factor for you in choosing the special one

2 Likes

Re: Which Girl Do I Decide On? by Fxwarrior: 6:05am On Oct 17, 2015
lookingbuoy:

My friendship with the unemployed one is so unfettered and we goof around a lot. It's like two children playing in the sand, and i kinda like that. She's hoping that I'll ask her out formally, but i don't like her unemployed situation.

My friendship with the independent one is kinda rigid and formal. We talk, gist, go to dinner dates, but hardly joke around. We do joke around sometimes though.

And it seems i want what both of them have: i want the freedom i get with the other lady and the independence i get with the other

Op I will be very honest with you and straight forward. You are earning 7 figures a month? Like #1 000 000. Something most graduates can't boast of in their bank account. If true I will say you have done well for yourself.That said, let me proceed to the nitty gritty.

The role of a wife is to be a helpmate and assist her husband in all things including finance otherwise she's a liability.#Fact

Is your psychology girl hardworking? Does she have any learnt skills like hair dressing, fashion designing, is she accountable or frivolous? If she has any skills then you can decide to open up a place for her after marriage if she can manage it well and is wise you'll be surprised at her progress. If she doesn't have any skills and is not interested in learning one. Simply take a walk.

Many graduates have been disappointed to know that the course they read in school has no prospects in the real world. Someone reading history, philosophy, psychology, religion(abi you wan become Bishop? ). They come out after the euphoria of NYSC has died down to face reality.

The second girl. Is she humble? Is she reliable? Can she relocate with you to Nigeria or you'll be shuttling between Nigeria and there? To me its stressful and weakens relationship.
For the rich girl, is she a good cook or you will hire a cook after wedding or be eating at restaurants for the rest of your life.
These are worth considering.

#Last Bullet: Marry your best friend. Which of them is your best friend?
Since you're earning 7 figures then money is not your real problem.

For me once I establish the Psychology girl is industrious and a good cook. I will marry her and pour in money into establishing a great business in the area of her admired skills.

1 Like

Re: Which Girl Do I Decide On? by GogetterMD(m): 6:05am On Oct 17, 2015
lookingbuoy:

My friendship with the unemployed one is so unfettered and we goof around a lot. It's like two children playing in the sand, and i kinda like that. She's hoping that I'll ask her out formally, but i don't like her unemployed situation.

My friendship with the independent one is kinda rigid and formal. We talk, gist, go to dinner dates, but hardly joke around. We do joke around sometimes though.

And it seems i want what both of them have: i want the freedom i get with the other lady and the independence i get with the other
It's kinda annoying when you keep talking about her unemployed situation. Is she gonna remain unemployed forever? And besides, even if she were earning a juicy salary, it's still your primary responsibility as a man to cater for EVERY need of your wife, and kids.
And besides, don't assume that they both are waiting for you to ask them out. "I see you more as a brother "kinda thing could be a sucker punch response
Re: Which Girl Do I Decide On? by Fxwarrior: 6:08am On Oct 17, 2015
jaybee3:
You should marry the one you are most comfortable with

If you earn as much as you've claimed then simply empower the one you seem to have much fun with.
Her being empowered will stimulate and forcefully reveal her independent mindset which in turn will almost certainly increase your affection towards her.

Money becomes important in marriages when it's in short supply so it shouldn't be a deciding factor for you in choosing the special one

My point exactly!
Re: Which Girl Do I Decide On? by Fxwarrior: 6:12am On Oct 17, 2015
LaraiBoluwaji:

Will the unemployed one remain unemployed forever?

Marry your friend.

Lol. Trust a girl to support a girl as if you'll do the same if it were a guy and you were earning 7 figures. Youl'll be aiming for Aliko Dangote's son.
Re: Which Girl Do I Decide On? by banchuz: 6:30am On Oct 17, 2015
Slimzjoe:
Marry the one with the bigger Br3ast

lwkmd
Re: Which Girl Do I Decide On? by mrkels(m): 6:44am On Oct 17, 2015
Harbosede02:
I never knew there was a theory that states that once an unemployed is forever an unemployed.... Pls ur thinking faculty is so so annoying.... So becos the other lady is jobless makes her less eligible to be ur wife??


Guys!!!! angry

Swirry, you took this post too personal.

Does any of the ladies in the thread describe you?
Re: Which Girl Do I Decide On? by Nobody: 6:55am On Oct 17, 2015
Ooooooo
Re: Which Girl Do I Decide On? by Nobody: 6:56am On Oct 17, 2015
Harbosede02:
I never knew there was a theory that states that once an unemployed is forever an unemployed.... Pls ur thinking faculty is so so annoying.... So becos the other lady is jobless makes her less eligible to be ur wife??


Guys!!!! angry
true talk. It shows the op is so lame, greedy and thinks about only himself. With the situation in nigeria, you are still basing your decision on something that is temporary and not on character. Its a pity.
Re: Which Girl Do I Decide On? by Jamean(f): 7:00am On Oct 17, 2015
lookingbuoy:

Thanks

I hope that at the end of this debate you will be better informed to make a right decision that will positively affect the future.

No matter what people think; it's still your life and you will be the beneficiary of the turn of events.

Okbye grin
Re: Which Girl Do I Decide On? by dantori(m): 7:15am On Oct 17, 2015
lookingbuoy:
Hmm...
You are right. I'm actually more smitten by the unemployed lady. But i dont like her unemployed situation. And she also comes off as not so independent. The other lady is as pretty, way more independent (perhaps totally), holds her on and carries herself well. She has most things I've fantasized about my woman having, only my relationship with her is not as boundless as what i have with the unemployed lady.
I believe i can comfortably take care of the home with the unemployed one. However, i don't like her unemployed situation one bit.
:-)

For crying sake you earn 7 digits then get her a business it will even make y'all convenient as she will have more time for the home front

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