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How Can A Parent Tame A Delinquent Child? - Family (4) - Nairaland

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Re: How Can A Parent Tame A Delinquent Child? by Adeevah(m): 11:15am On Dec 21, 2015
Send him to a remand home immediately...
Re: How Can A Parent Tame A Delinquent Child? by omoharry(f): 11:15am On Dec 21, 2015
tearoses:
What were the parents looking at before now
He didn't just start this yesterday
How did they bring him up?
Imagine the effrontery . . the kid threatening to beat up his mother.

It may be too late to get this boy back on the right line. at 16 he is almost an adult and if he offends, he will be treated like an adult.

The problem with kids like this is that the whole community suffers. soon he will be out there being a nuisance to everyone.
they spared the rode and eventaully spoilt the child...I remember when my cousine, grown up guy if 17 yrs, slapped his elder sister of 25 years old..his father ordered my other neighbours to beat him and lock him up in a guard room for two days..he never tried that nonsense again..
Re: How Can A Parent Tame A Delinquent Child? by engrhorla(m): 11:18am On Dec 21, 2015
YourMain:


I'm not a promoter of beating your kids.

That is ridiculous. If he wants to act like he's all big and tough then they should treat him like so. It'll slap him back to reality without them doing anything. They should deny him if everything they provide him. Food water shelter school. I don't even care. You never disrespect your parents.

Hmmm, doing that could endanger him the more.

Believe you me, this boy has fallen into bad company. I see him suffering psychologically.

He needs help and he needs it fast..its such kids that end up a cultist, rogue, rapist, in short a menace to d society.

D parents shld show him love, pray for him and I see d family kinda far from God too.

A counsellor may be of help. And deliverance might be a last resort!
Re: How Can A Parent Tame A Delinquent Child? by Nobody: 11:21am On Dec 21, 2015
engrhorla:


Hmmm, doing that could endanger him the more.

Believe you me, this boy has fallen into bad company. I see him suffering psychologically.

He needs help and he needs it fast..its such kids that end up a cultist, rogue, rapist, in short a menace to d society.

D parents shld show him love, pray for him and I see d family kinda far from God too.

A counsellor may be of help. And deliverance might be a last resort!

Counselling honestly doesn't work.

Deliverance hahaha

I'd recommend love and kindness too but I don't think its working...
Re: How Can A Parent Tame A Delinquent Child? by danidee10(m): 11:40am On Dec 21, 2015
Hope he dosen't Smoke weed or does he?? does he take any drug (codine, tramadol or others), he might be stubborn naturally then it's being enhanced by the drugs he takes, it's very common among young boys today


i think the best thing is to treat him like an adult, if he feels like he is bigger than everyone else, simpley deny him food, shelter, school everything let him go and live on his own...when he realizes that he can't take care of himself then he will come back to his senses and come back home, then when he comes back give him all the conditions for him to live properly in the house and make sure he agrees to follow the rules....if he dosen't don't accept him....don't compromise because of love

Most times the parents can't do this because of the love they have for him, so it's best an outsider does this because the parents might not be able to carry on

Never use violence....violence will only do two things
1. Kill him or injure him seriously
2. Make him more violent and he can kill someone (he will pretend to be ok, then when he has the chance he will take revenge)


The probability of love and kindness working is 10%.....Trust me...he'll keep taking advantage of your love and won't behave himself....be ruthless (but not with violence)

1 Like

Re: How Can A Parent Tame A Delinquent Child? by armylord: 12:02pm On Dec 21, 2015
just give me 20mins ..I'll so.deal with him, he's forming temper, abi ..ha hasn't seen temper.....Disrespectful cow..
Re: How Can A Parent Tame A Delinquent Child? by Nobody: 12:12pm On Dec 21, 2015
Spare d rod and spoil d child,but when its gets too much,d child might turn really violent,so sometimes the best way to tame a child is just talking to him in a gentle way.
Re: How Can A Parent Tame A Delinquent Child? by Nobody: 12:17pm On Dec 21, 2015
ggirl4real:


Even when your own child is threatening you?

Don't you think his parents should arrange boys to teach him a lesson?

Anyway, his parents love him so much that they wouldn't consider that.
what kind of parent will arrange for boys to beat their child...r u dat kinda person? undecided
Re: How Can A Parent Tame A Delinquent Child? by motaio: 12:17pm On Dec 21, 2015
Take the child to the zoo
Re: How Can A Parent Tame A Delinquent Child? by adekanbai: 12:34pm On Dec 21, 2015
The boy should be taken to NDA immediately after his secondary school.
Re: How Can A Parent Tame A Delinquent Child? by compujyde: 1:01pm On Dec 21, 2015
...
Re: How Can A Parent Tame A Delinquent Child? by smartsammie(m): 1:19pm On Dec 21, 2015
He is a teenager and emotionally unstable. Don't let us just jump into conclusions. Probably he might be going through some emotional stress. I will advise his parents to take him to a psychologist as soon as possible.
Re: How Can A Parent Tame A Delinquent Child? by Cityguy: 1:22pm On Dec 21, 2015
ggirl4real:


Even when your own child is threatening you?

Don't you think his parents should arrange boys to teach him a lesson?

Anyway, his parents love him so much that they wouldn't consider that.
Sorry I do not share your view that they love him. I think it's abuse! Coupled with the fact that he has become a terror to them. If he chose to act all big as someone said earlier, he should be so treated. My dad had once reported his own son to police and that to some extent check-mated one of my sibs. He should be trained properly at home cos that's the bedrock. He may grow to assume that bullying his way is the right attitude to everything. Antisocial personality disorder loading.....am afraid. cry
Re: How Can A Parent Tame A Delinquent Child? by smartsammie(m): 1:25pm On Dec 21, 2015
He is a teenager and emotionally unstable. Don't let us just jump into conclusions. Probably he might be going through some emotional stress. I will advise his parents to take him to a psychologist as soon as possible.

Besides, probably is parents over pampered him when he was young and all these private schools are not helping matters they just want to maximise profit. They don't beat them would just let them do whatever they like. My little cousin is almost becoming like that. She wakes up in the morning and won't greet my 69 years old father.

Anytime I am around I spank her a lot. Thank God she's young and she is already changing.
Re: How Can A Parent Tame A Delinquent Child? by June24th: 1:58pm On Dec 21, 2015
ggirl4real:
There's this my neighbour's son that's stubborn.

What bothers me more is the way he talks to his mum. He's about 16years old and in SS3 but I tell you, when he's angry, he'll shout his mum down no matter what she says to him.

He once said to the mum "if you dare touch me with that cane, I'll collect it and beat you", the mum had to seek for help from a neighbour.

Before now, the father could tame him but it seems that he has outgrown his father's control too...

He just made pronoucements like "God punish you" (Abasi umia ufen) to his younger sister who is barely 5years old. When his father scolded him, he shouted back at his father in a very violent manner and they're still exchanging words right now. I'm personally afraid from my compound...

I had to tell my sister that if this boy is not tamed, in the next two years, he'll beat everyone in that house...

Please, what could have caused this attitude? and what can be done to put this nasty behaviour on check before it gets out of hand? I'm personally afraid for his parents.
From my own point of view, I think two things may have caused him to be so stubborn now:
1) He might be someone whom the parents brought up providing all his wants and now they might not be able to provide all that.
2) He might be someone who was brought up in an abusive home (probably physical abuse) which makes him hardhearted now.
.
.
If numb 1 is the case, the parents need to sit him down and have a heart to heart talk with him about independence. If numb 2 is the case, then its time to show him love and more love and also teach him to love others too.
Above all, this kind needs prayers too as it is only God who can deliver him totally and quickly from his bad attitudes...
Thank you.
Re: How Can A Parent Tame A Delinquent Child? by June24th: 1:59pm On Dec 21, 2015
engrhorla:


Hmmm, doing that could endanger him the more.

Believe you me, this boy has fallen into bad company. I see him suffering psychologically.

He needs help and he needs it fast..its such kids that end up a cultist, rogue, rapist, in short a menace to d society.

D parents shld show him love, pray for him and I see d family kinda far from God too.

A counsellor may be of help. And deliverance might be a last resort!
Re: How Can A Parent Tame A Delinquent Child? by efficiencie(m): 2:04pm On Dec 21, 2015
Pray that the spirit of anger is knocked out of his head; in the event of another outburst call in the police, make a special request and get him disciplined formally for being a threat to guardians and sibs; if he still doesnt repent the father should prepare his will, give the errant boy who thinks he's now a man, his portion and send him packing immediately but while he's away the family should pray for the prodigal son...betrayal, poverty and loneliness will teach him better and faster...
Re: How Can A Parent Tame A Delinquent Child? by lanrywatt(m): 2:21pm On Dec 21, 2015
The best solution is to take him to a remand home or juvenile correctional home for 3months is enough to correct the divorce brain in is head
Re: How Can A Parent Tame A Delinquent Child? by maxti: 2:58pm On Dec 21, 2015
ggirl4real:


Slap ke! He'll slap you back ooo

I don't know why I feel that he's joined some bad boys in school because at home, their parents lock them inside when they are leaving for work.
He needs stronger hands. Let soldiers lock him up for a week.
After the drilling, he would change.
Re: How Can A Parent Tame A Delinquent Child? by teehef: 3:46pm On Dec 21, 2015
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Re: How Can A Parent Tame A Delinquent Child? by Charly68: 3:55pm On Dec 21, 2015
A boy once behaved that way before unknown to the parents that he was in a secret cult at school..I ean from secondary school...manage to hide Untill he graduated and marry but one day his wife caught him in the act with his group & he killed the innocent girl..up till now he is in kirikiri for murder. No child should be spared the rod Untill they reach puberty & are on their own.. How can you be feeding a child & yet can no control him or her ? This was never the case before in Afica but western culture has degraded our moral values
Re: How Can A Parent Tame A Delinquent Child? by darlenese(f): 7:22pm On Dec 21, 2015
The parents have failed in their responsibility to train up that boy,

I'm disappointed in the parents
Re: How Can A Parent Tame A Delinquent Child? by Andykruiz(m): 7:43pm On Dec 21, 2015
I'm not a fan of military punishment but nothwithstanding, when a child needs to be smacked, smack him!! The parents apparently failed to nip this in the bud when the child was growing up. Since the child is violent, a violent approach is not an option. They should just withdraw his benefits and keep their rooms under lock and key (cos he'll resort to stealing). And if the child commits "breaking and entering" the police is always ur friend (desperate situations require desperate measures).
Re: How Can A Parent Tame A Delinquent Child? by hameina(f): 8:05pm On Dec 21, 2015
The best way to deal with this is by seeking the help or advice from a child psychiatrist..They are medical doctors and u ll see them at the mental health section of any teaching or general hospital. For all you care; d poor kid may just require sm meds and a bit of behavioural therapy. For he may be suffern frm some chilhood medical/psychiatric conditions making him aggressive and violent
Re: How Can A Parent Tame A Delinquent Child? by Tellemall: 8:17pm On Dec 21, 2015
ggirl4real:


The funny thing is that the parents provide everything he needs even when it's not convenient for them.

They'll not love to leave him on his own.

Another thing I observe is that the parents didn't use cane on him while he was small, could that contribute to this attitude?

You sound like a girl named blessing.
Re: How Can A Parent Tame A Delinquent Child? by edgideon(m): 9:18pm On Dec 21, 2015
OCTAVO:
Mehn! This one is serious. But violent approach from parents doesn't solve this kind of issue often times. It's just an adolescent stage, the stage will soon pass.
at 16 yrs of age u said he s adolecent at dat age i feared cane nd ma fada ,hu born me to tlk bk abeg mke drm send am go soilder skul,boarding skul or go nd stay with an uncle dat s a discilpinarian......dats wat me feel
Re: How Can A Parent Tame A Delinquent Child? by Guysses(m): 9:29pm On Dec 21, 2015
Thats my job,contact me at 08065938895
Re: How Can A Parent Tame A Delinquent Child? by tpppi: 10:51pm On Dec 21, 2015
The HOLY BOOK said it all,train up a child in the way he should go,so that when he is old he will not depart from it.Pro 22:6,SIGN OF THE END
Re: How Can A Parent Tame A Delinquent Child? by ggirl4real: 12:42pm On Dec 22, 2015
Tellemall:

You sound like a girl named blessing.
Blessing ke! No be me ooo
Re: How Can A Parent Tame A Delinquent Child? by ggirl4real: 12:44pm On Dec 22, 2015
maxti:

He needs stronger hands. Let soldiers lock him up for a week.
After the drilling, he would change.

That's a good one! But his mum can't stand another person talking harshly to his son talkless of giving him up for discipline by soldiers.
Re: How Can A Parent Tame A Delinquent Child? by ggirl4real: 12:50pm On Dec 22, 2015
June24th:

From my own point of view, I think two things may have caused him to be so stubborn now:
1) He might be someone whom the parents brought up providing all his wants and now they might not be able to provide all that.
2) He might be someone who was brought up in an abusive home (probably physical abuse) which makes him hardhearted now.
.
.
If numb 1 is the case, the parents need to sit him down and have a heart to heart talk with him about independence. If numb 2 is the case, then its time to show him love and more love and also teach him to love others too.
Above all, this kind needs prayers too as it is only God who can deliver him totally and quickly from his bad attitudes...
Thank you.

Thanks for your contribution!

None of those instances you've mentioned is the case here! The parents are not so rich but they make sure they provide everything for them.

Also, I don't think there's any form of physical abuse in their home!

My major observation is that the dad is hot-tempered. Maybe it's genetic.
Re: How Can A Parent Tame A Delinquent Child? by ggirl4real: 12:53pm On Dec 22, 2015
Cityguy:

Sorry I do not share your view that they love him. I think it's abuse! Coupled with the fact that he has become a terror to them. If he chose to act all big as someone said earlier, he should be so treated. My dad had once reported his own son to police and that to some extent check-mated one of my sibs. He should be trained properly at home cos that's the bedrock. He may grow to assume that bullying his way is the right attitude to everything. Antisocial personality disorder loading.....am afraid. cry

Seriously! He has warned the mum several times that if she dares to touch him with cane, he'll get back the cane and use it on her! Now, this is ridiculous

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