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Should I Wait For My Love Abroad Or Should I Accept My Ex Back? - Romance (4) - Nairaland

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How To Get Your Ex Back After Breaking Up/Divorce / My Fiancée Is Requesting For 500K Before She Can Accept My Wedding Proposal / "My Boyfriend Jailed For 15 Years Abroad, Insists I Wait For Him" - 29-Year-Old (2) (3) (4)

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Re: Should I Wait For My Love Abroad Or Should I Accept My Ex Back? by swaggprofessor(m): 6:16pm On May 11, 2016
sweetheart12:
I Need Your Advise Please

I will sincerely appreciate a good advise from you all.

I have been in a relationship for 7 years, in this relationship i was in, the guys father never like me from the day he heard my name. My boyfriend then asked him severally even the mum also asked the dad why he didnt like me, but he was not able to give any reason.

Myself and this my boyfriend has had several breakup due to his father not liking me.

The third time i broke up with him was because he beat me up and left several injury on me. He came back to beg and apologize and all then i accepted him back. A time came when we planed to do our wedding, when his dad heard of it he never supported it. Our Pastors asked him why he never wanted us to be together but still there was no reason given.

After this incident my family said i cant marry him since his father has never accepted me. I was not able to let go cos i was thinking how i will throw away the 7 years of relationship, but not quite long my boyfriend came to me and said he wanted us to breakup since his father wont accept, i cried n cried but at the end i decided to let go.

After 6 months i heard he has done introduction with a girl the father like and all. after a year now the same guy is now calling me saying he wants us to come back together and get married, he said he does not love the girl he was forced to do introduction with by his dad, he said he has told the girl he didnt love her and cant marry her,he also said his dad has accepted that we can get married now. DO I GO BACK TO HIM OR NOT?

During this last breakup we had, i met a very nice guy by name Sammy he has been so nice and good to me, When i and Sammy met it was not up to 6 months before Sammy traveled out of the country. He was supposed to be away from the country for 2 years then he will return and we will do our wedding. Sammy loves me alot, he is a God fearing person but recently he told me he's not sure of his coming home in next 2 years as planed, when i asked him what the new plan is and when he will return home he said he cant say, Sammy still loves me and wants us to be together but i am worried how long i will have wait before he returns. And now my ex boyfriend is saying he wants us to get married. i am just confused.

What do i do please? I need advise please.
(in slow tune) I say this is super storrrryyyyyy
Re: Should I Wait For My Love Abroad Or Should I Accept My Ex Back? by segzy0i(m): 6:17pm On May 11, 2016
Baby u better wait for the guy abroad or better still look for anoda man dt ur ex is interested in using u nd som1 who can beat u wen courting may likely kill u like lekan shonde kill ronke nd many likes we ve seen or heard pls an abusive relationship does nt worth it and its bettee to be single dan to be divorced
Re: Should I Wait For My Love Abroad Or Should I Accept My Ex Back? by tonnelo: 6:20pm On May 11, 2016
abeg show me your eyes well, well husband de scarce before you go lose both side
Re: Should I Wait For My Love Abroad Or Should I Accept My Ex Back? by Samakus(m): 6:20pm On May 11, 2016
sweetheart12:
I Need Your Advise Please


During this last breakup we had, i met a very nice guy by name Sammy he has been so nice and good to me, When i and Sammy met it was not up to 6 months before Sammy traveled out of the country. He was supposed to be away from the country for 2 years then he will return and we will do our wedding. Sammy loves me alot, he is a God fearing person but recently he told me he's not sure of his coming home in next 2 years as planed, when i asked him what the new plan is and when he will return home he said he cant say




The bolded aptly describes me. I'm beginning to suspect that this "Sweetheart" must be my Rosemary. Rosy is that you? Are you a nairalander too?

But I dey Naija na. When I come travel outside for work na? Let alone to say that I won't be coming back in the next 2 years. Ekenekwam gi. Don't worry dear, just like OBJ, I dey kampe. Package the sweetest thing your mama gave you well for me this weekend. Inugo?


BTW, quote me and see how herdsmen's knife work wonders on heads like yours.

1 Like

Re: Should I Wait For My Love Abroad Or Should I Accept My Ex Back? by opey112(m): 6:21pm On May 11, 2016
Use your brain.... You are the only one left now after a whole seven years.my advice wait for the man who will love you for who you are. But there must be a reason his dad not to like you..
Re: Should I Wait For My Love Abroad Or Should I Accept My Ex Back? by naijaboiy: 6:21pm On May 11, 2016
Berlyn:
tell me the truth u commented because you wanna be FTC grin yes or nah
Seriously naah! gringrin
Re: Should I Wait For My Love Abroad Or Should I Accept My Ex Back? by Nobody: 6:23pm On May 11, 2016
sweetheart12:
I Need Your Advise Please

I will sincerely appreciate a good advise from you all.

I have been in a relationship for 7 years, in this relationship i was in, the guys father never like me from the day he heard my name. My boyfriend then asked him severally even the mum also asked the dad why he didnt like me, but he was not able to give any reason.

Myself and this my boyfriend has had several breakup due to his father not liking me.

The third time i broke up with him was because he beat me up and left several injury on me. He came back to beg and apologize and all then i accepted him back. A time came when we planed to do our wedding, when his dad heard of it he never supported it. Our Pastors asked him why he never wanted us to be together but still there was no reason given.

After this incident my family said i cant marry him since his father has never accepted me. I was not able to let go cos i was thinking how i will throw away the 7 years of relationship, but not quite long my boyfriend came to me and said he wanted us to breakup since his father wont accept, i cried n cried but at the end i decided to let go.

After 6 months i heard he has done introduction with a girl the father like and all. after a year now the same guy is now calling me saying he wants us to come back together and get married, he said he does not love the girl he was forced to do introduction with by his dad, he said he has told the girl he didnt love her and cant marry her,he also said his dad has accepted that we can get married now. DO I GO BACK TO HIM OR NOT?

During this last breakup we had, i met a very nice guy by name Sammy he has been so nice and good to me, When i and Sammy met it was not up to 6 months before Sammy traveled out of the country. He was supposed to be away from the country for 2 years then he will return and we will do our wedding. Sammy loves me alot, he is a God fearing person but recently he told me he's not sure of his coming home in next 2 years as planed, when i asked him what the new plan is and when he will return home he said he cant say, Sammy still loves me and wants us to be together but i am worried how long i will have wait before he returns. And now my ex boyfriend is saying he wants us to get married. i am just confused.

What do i do please? I need advise please.


Just look around go places you go see goof man for you.
Re: Should I Wait For My Love Abroad Or Should I Accept My Ex Back? by 2goodbobo(m): 6:26pm On May 11, 2016
Your ex will eventually turn you to a punching bag if you marry him and your current boyfriend is not certain when he will return. My advice? Let both of them go and wait for a neutral person. The right man will come.
Re: Should I Wait For My Love Abroad Or Should I Accept My Ex Back? by favourboy1(m): 6:40pm On May 11, 2016
sweetheart12:
I Need Your Advise Please

I will sincerely appreciate a good advise from you all.

I have been in a relationship for 7 years, in this relationship i was in, the guys father never like me from the day he heard my name. My boyfriend then asked him severally even the mum also asked the dad why he didnt like me, but he was not able to give any reason.

Myself and this my boyfriend has had several breakup due to his father not liking me.

The third time i broke up with him was because he beat me up and left several injury on me. He came back to beg and apologize and all then i accepted him back. A time came when we planed to do our wedding, when his dad heard of it he never supported it. Our Pastors asked him why he never wanted us to be together but still there was no reason given.

After this incident my family said i cant marry him since his father has never accepted me. I was not able to let go cos i was thinking how i will throw away the 7 years of relationship, but not quite long my boyfriend came to me and said he wanted us to breakup since his father wont accept, i cried n cried but at the end i decided to let go.

After 6 months i heard he has done introduction with a girl the father like and all. after a year now the same guy is now calling me saying he wants us to come back together and get married, he said he does not love the girl he was forced to do introduction with by his dad, he said he has told the girl he didnt love her and cant marry her,he also said his dad has accepted that we can get married now. DO I GO BACK TO HIM OR NOT?

During this last breakup we had, i met a very nice guy by name Sammy he has been so nice and good to me, When i and Sammy met it was not up to 6 months before Sammy traveled out of the country. He was supposed to be away from the country for 2 years then he will return and we will do our wedding. Sammy loves me alot, he is a God fearing person but recently he told me he's not sure of his coming home in next 2 years as planed, when i asked him what the new plan is and when he will return home he said he cant say, Sammy still loves me and wants us to be together but i am worried how long i will have wait before he returns. And now my ex boyfriend is saying he wants us to get married. i am just confused.

What do i do please? I need advise please.
did the first guy sex you. Yes or No. Dn i wil advse u
Re: Should I Wait For My Love Abroad Or Should I Accept My Ex Back? by AAABBB123: 6:41pm On May 11, 2016
I read d first two comments or so & this is my contribution....the writer never wrote abt d first boyfriend getting married to another lady but rather said, he did introduction...so, if the guy is to be trusted...he must be strong to call it all off after d introduction & finally getting his father to submit to what he wanted...families can be very difficult to deal with..alot of people wldnt understand until they go through it...but then, I realized you said he as once abused you physically, the most important reason why you shouldnt go back to him...about the second guy...it is possible he loves you but considering all possible contingencies, you shouldnt wait for him...so at the moment, I think u are single but not sure u are searching,....
Re: Should I Wait For My Love Abroad Or Should I Accept My Ex Back? by HaneefahRN(f): 6:43pm On May 11, 2016
Choose none. Find another man.
A man that already beat you up once during courtship, doesn't even know what decisions to take, already close to marriage to another lady, with a father that doesn't want to see you, is nothing but bad news.

The other guy you are waiting for might not come back to you in 2 years time and you ain't getting any younger.

Choose another man you feel is worthy is you, pray for guidance and use your brain.
Re: Should I Wait For My Love Abroad Or Should I Accept My Ex Back? by ayaside(m): 6:47pm On May 11, 2016
Smiles...Sounds like my story.My name is Sammy and she stays in Nigeria.I know about her ex.So,we should also consider this "Sammy" quite well too.
Re: Should I Wait For My Love Abroad Or Should I Accept My Ex Back? by Kingzy4pep(m): 6:47pm On May 11, 2016
mhizeva:
First of all I don't trust Sammy... because men can be so crafty... I mean what do you know about his business, his earlier lifestyle and what is the real reason why he Travelled. have you done this research....
My dear don't base your heart on love alone.... because no marriage can stand on love alone

Secondly, for your ex.... I will advise you not to go back to him... One reason is that men are strong and vibrant and natural born leaders... If a man cannot stand for himself with the love he has for you and marry you even against his father''s wishes then he is not going to stand for you in much more difficult situations..

Secondly, he gave up on you too quickly, by going to marry another girl.... meaning that his father controls him... If his father hadnt accepted in the end that means he wont have come back for you....

Thirdly, think about the other woman that just got married to him... Thats one reason why you should off him

Fourthly, Wait for a genuine man.... Search the net, read books and you will understand what a real man is made up off my dear....

Love cannot keep a marriage forever... If it could then why are so many american marriages falling apart today after the expensive weddings in which the man professed his love...

Stay Healthy, Stay Wise
Stick to this advice.
Re: Should I Wait For My Love Abroad Or Should I Accept My Ex Back? by Nobody: 6:51pm On May 11, 2016
VampireeM:
Its quite obvious none of these men are meant for you.. please tell that your married ex to stop disturbing and calling you, mean it.. The dude abroad should be kept @ the friendzone.

Dear Its time for you to mingle more with men who are ready for a serious relationship and wants to settle down and in all things pray to God to give you your own man..

All the best

I approve this message and nothing to contribute to it.
Re: Should I Wait For My Love Abroad Or Should I Accept My Ex Back? by bobkezel(m): 7:00pm On May 11, 2016
Forget the first guy entirely. As for the second guy, play along with him and don't shut urself out from other prospective suitors.
Re: Should I Wait For My Love Abroad Or Should I Accept My Ex Back? by yoged(m): 7:02pm On May 11, 2016
Oh God . What's this world turning to . Banging head on the wall. You see death and calamity and you want to walk straight into it . And later you'll come back to tell us how he has turn you to punnching bag .
Re: Should I Wait For My Love Abroad Or Should I Accept My Ex Back? by AntiWailer: 7:05pm On May 11, 2016
Your ex missed Sex with you.


He used that story to be able to have unlimited access to the port. AFter he gets tired with sex again, his father's story will re surface.

Update me after 6 months of hard labour.
Re: Should I Wait For My Love Abroad Or Should I Accept My Ex Back? by logicalhumour: 7:07pm On May 11, 2016
Wait for Mr Right
Re: Should I Wait For My Love Abroad Or Should I Accept My Ex Back? by ted1741: 7:15pm On May 11, 2016
The puzzle is not as complicated as it seems. The first question you have to ask yourself is, if Sammy and your ex are placed side by side, whom will you choose. If it is Sammy who has shown you love and respect, no physical/mental abuse so far, express your concern and let him know that you cannot wait ad in finitum, that you want to get married and don't want to be left in limbo with no definitive plan and purpose in sight. Don't show desperation in your voice, just make a statement. Make him aware that suitors are coming but don't be specific and never mention that it is your ex to avoid the male egocentric propensity. The moment you say it is your ex, he will become territorial, apprehensive and insecure and bombard you with a million questions like when you saw him last, where, how, why, what happened and all the "mombo jumbo" sex related insecure questions. It appears though from his responses to your curious question of his return target, that he may be slowly waning out of the relationship eventhough he claims to still love you. The development may not be apparent to you because you are still relishing him and the memories of times spent together. Listen carefully for the spark or otherwise in his voice when next you speak to him, those sparks or otherwise speak volumes and can tell if he is still the same old Sammy you knew. Also, begin to appraise the frequency of the calls from him; if it has diminished, it is a good barometer that something is amiss. On the part of your ex, be careful because if he is already abusing you physically now, it can only get worst. It is interesting that at this time and age, he is still a father's boy and unable to make his own decisions as a man particularly on issues of heart that transcend culture, nurture and principle. I will be very wary of him. Most important, it may well be that neither of these men is for you. So, don't be or show desperation and hastily marry the wrong person. Remember what the legendary Greek Philosopher, Socrates said, "don't claim to be luck until you are married" because it can make you if it is the right person or break you perpetually if it is the wrong person. Goodluck.

1 Like

Re: Should I Wait For My Love Abroad Or Should I Accept My Ex Back? by habsydiamond(m): 7:33pm On May 11, 2016
U can't kill two birds with one stone. so its better you make ur decision so fast so that u won't end up getting hurt.
Re: Should I Wait For My Love Abroad Or Should I Accept My Ex Back? by ChukwuemekaVal(m): 7:47pm On May 11, 2016
Forget your ex guy, that's why we are still looking for the value of X. Still keep in touch with the abroad guy but accept any serious guy that may come your way. I DON'T TRUST THIS OBODO OYIBO GUYS. Experience and ranking has no better substitute. Good luck!
Re: Should I Wait For My Love Abroad Or Should I Accept My Ex Back? by AreaFada2: 7:55pm On May 11, 2016
mhizeva:
First of all I don't trust Sammy... because men can be so crafty... I mean what do you know about his business, his earlier lifestyle and what is the real reason why he Travelled. have you done this research....
My dear don't base your heart on love alone.... because no marriage can stand on love alone

Secondly, for your ex.... I will advise you not to go back to him... One reason is that men are strong and vibrant and natural born leaders... If a man cannot stand for himself with the love he has for you and marry you even against his father''s wishes then he is not going to stand for you in much more difficult situations..

Secondly, he gave up on you too quickly, by going to marry another girl.... meaning that his father controls him... If his father hadnt accepted in the end that means he wont have come back for you....

Thirdly, think about the other woman that just got married to him... Thats one reason why you should off him

Fourthly, Wait for a genuine man.... Search the net, read books and you will understand what a real man is made up off my dear....

Love cannot keep a marriage forever... If it could then why are so many american marriages falling apart today after the expensive weddings in which the man professed his love...

Stay Healthy, Stay Wise

Please be careful how you advise people before you seriously damage people. This is over-generalisation.
A friend advised my teenage love I left in 9ja to study abroad exactly like same.

While I was trying to make ends meet as a foreign student, trying to do nothing against the law, avoiding all the succulent babes from wealthy families in my school, my 9ja babe went ahead and marry another person.

Quite funny that the guy she married is also a very abusive man. When I returned, she was in the middle of one their many break-ups.

Anyhow, she's enduring a torrid marriage now. I was initially devastated, but I have moved on now.

Check some of my old posts from years back. I have mentioned this many times before.

Many people studying abroad have to work very hard to see themselves through, financially & emotionally. No sorting or buying pamphlets to pass.
Please stop your generalisation, and quit sounding authoritative on this issue.

1 Like

Re: Should I Wait For My Love Abroad Or Should I Accept My Ex Back? by MrDoGood(m): 7:58pm On May 11, 2016
No amount of advice here will help rather than asking your creator what to do next.

I don't want to come here and read about

"help my marriage is collapsing"


Not your portion anyway.


Don't be in a rush even if your in Ur late twenties
...... Cos I don't think you're older than grandma the great blogger
Re: Should I Wait For My Love Abroad Or Should I Accept My Ex Back? by fuckpoverty(m): 8:00pm On May 11, 2016
am even more confuse Dan u re wit dis ur write up.....jst seek d face of amadioha
Re: Should I Wait For My Love Abroad Or Should I Accept My Ex Back? by fuckpoverty(m): 8:02pm On May 11, 2016
MrDoGood:
No amount of advice here will help rather than asking your creator what to do next.

I don't want to come here and read about

"help my marriage is collapsing"


Not your portion anyway.


Don't be in a rush even if your in Ur late twenties
...... Cos I don't think you're older than grandma the great blogger





wat do u mean on d contrary?
Re: Should I Wait For My Love Abroad Or Should I Accept My Ex Back? by fuckpoverty(m): 8:04pm On May 11, 2016
MrDoGood:
No amount of advice here will help rather than asking your creator what to do next.

I don't want to come here and read about

"help my marriage is collapsing"


Not your portion anyway.


Don't be in a rush even if your in Ur late twenties
...... Cos I don't think you're older than grandma the great blogger





wat do u mean on d contrary,if our grandma catch u heeeeennn
Re: Should I Wait For My Love Abroad Or Should I Accept My Ex Back? by Acidosis(m): 8:05pm On May 11, 2016
How do women cope with abusive relationships, beatings, floggings, etc.? I wish I can understand their reasons.

Meanwhile, if I were your brother, I'd advise and beg you to avoid getting married to your Ex, or waiting for Sammy.

You shouldn't even consider marriage with your Ex (he ought to be behind bars).

Meanwhile, Sammy is not worth waiting for. That guy is busy designing his career path. If you honestly know you cannot wait, MOVE ON!
Re: Should I Wait For My Love Abroad Or Should I Accept My Ex Back? by An0nimus: 8:05pm On May 11, 2016
sukkot:
is the sammys last name okposo ? undecided

He just might be grin

The story looks cooked though. Well garnished sef

1 Like 1 Share

Re: Should I Wait For My Love Abroad Or Should I Accept My Ex Back? by zomby(m): 8:23pm On May 11, 2016
@OP: i will make this very short

1. His father does not like you
2. He beat you up and left several injuries on you
3. He left you

Let us forget number 1 and number 3, and let us focus on number 2.
My friend, any man that beats you doesn't love you. You are not a goat, only a goat goes back to visit the man that beats her up.
Trust me, you deserve much better than this dude. Even if you want to leave Sammy (the dude in USA), you do not have to return back to a man that beat you up and left several injuries on you; leaving him is a priceless blessing. Stay focused be patient and have faith, God will bless you with the desire of your heart.

YOU ARE NOT A DRUM, DO NOT ALLOW ANY MAN TO BEAT ON YOU.

1 Like

Re: Should I Wait For My Love Abroad Or Should I Accept My Ex Back? by ogbevireo(m): 8:26pm On May 11, 2016
my simple questions are as follow:
1. must you marry any of these two guys?

2. why not take a break of atleast six months, before anything like relationship or marriage?

3. why would you consider a guy who hits you - with all the stories of women being abused and even being killed - for marriage?

my advise
1. in your next relationship try not to go under the sheets too early.

2. have some value of your own and stop acting like your life depends on being married.

3. where is God in your life? get God on board and let confusion go.

Have a great life.
Re: Should I Wait For My Love Abroad Or Should I Accept My Ex Back? by Rajosh(m): 8:29pm On May 11, 2016
if I were you, I won't marry any man that'll lay his hands on me. and I may consider breaking up with the new guy. the odds that you'll end up with your new guy don't look favorable at all.
Re: Should I Wait For My Love Abroad Or Should I Accept My Ex Back? by isnovic(m): 8:34pm On May 11, 2016
Guys never marry any girl against your parents wish just because of love. who love don epp?

If the woman cannot work out her relationship with your parents, then she ain't worth being your wife.

It is all too common for ladies to call a man who decide to listen to their parents on the choice of marriage as weaklings or not man enough while they themselves hope to give birth to Son who will value them even after they are married with a home of their own.

If she is not agreeable with your parents, then she will not be agreeable with you in the marriage. You can take that to the bank. If she loves you, she must love the whole package.

And that my dear means you, your siblings and your parents.

So ladies get your relationship right with your man's parent as he did not fall down from the tree, neither did he fall down from the heavens. Some parents must have labored to make him the gentleman you are in love with and they deserve a woman who will not make their kid forget about them and their labor of love.

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