TheSeeker:

What you did is the stupidest thing any guy can do. How and why in God's name will you be playing a girl's mind like that? If you've been together for that many years and you don't know who she is, then you're just the player/sucker here. Why couldn't you have let her be and let her deal with issues herself? And with your supposed finding now, you think she's not dating anyone else? What makes you so sure? How do you know she's not dating anyone else?
In a relationship, you do the best you can and leave the rest up to your partner and fate to decide. You can't know what runs in the mind of your partner or what they are doing behind your back; in fact, what they're doing behind you is inconsequential as long as you don't know about it and it's not done to your face.

If you don't trust your woman, there's every possibility that your relationship isn't healthy and there's no guarantee that it will be healthy. What would have happened if there was an undermining factor that leads you to think she's cheap? What if she didn't tell you someone is messaging her? Would you have assumed she's worthless? My friend, take heed next time. You don't stalk a girl around, it'll make her hate you.

As for you begging her mom, I don't think you owe her mom any kind of apology. So if you get married to her and you have a quarrel then you go plead to her mom? But for what? Doesn't make sense. I suggest you have a long talk with her and let her know you had let your feelings for her take over you and turned you into a jealous and insecure fellow. But apologize to her mom? No, it's not the right thing to do. If she insists you must apologize to her mom, then I'd safely conclude she's overbearing. Or does her mom know everything that transpires between you both? Na wa for this your relationship sef

,amebo no1:

exactum, apologise to the mum for what, he did not insult her, infact his primary priority is the gurl in question and not the mum,infact he owes the mum no apology or explanation, he should explain to the gurl who will be the one to pass it across to the mum

i mean why did she even tell her mother, cant lovers have probs without d gurls crying like victimised kittens to their mums and spilling the whole beans?

WTF

ThoniaSlim:

I would also be mad if I were in her position. . .but apologizing to her mum. . .is like? Hello you ain't in a relationship with her mum but with her. . .

But all said. . .If you love her as much as you've said. . .and apologizing to her mum is the solution to winning her love back. . .then you had better act fast brother!

TheSeeker:

Makes no sense. What if you have a problem with your boyfriend and he tells you to apologize to his mom, would you do it in the name of "love"? There's a fine line between love and stupidity. Just how will he start to tender his apology to her mom? What will he be saying to her?
That's a purposeful disrespect and insult on the guy's person in retaliation of what he did to her; howbeit, it has to be made clear that some guys behave like sissies but that doesn't mean a partner should make the error of another a point of advantage to make stupid requests.

If she decides she wants to leave the relationship because of his refusal to apologize to his mom then she's no different from the guy either.

ThoniaSlim:

lol. . . . . .Now that would have to be plain stupid of me. . .Well I get where your coming from. . .but he seems so desperate to get her back. . .simply why I said he should do it. . .

MoneyRule:

The guy's obviously desperate to get the girl back and she keeps saying "apologise to my mum", though i think it's uncalled for but, let him do it already! So if after he apologizes to the mum, she stalls, then he knows it was never about the apology and can then go get a life. I think it's better than being stuck on one thing.Afterall the mum already knows they were dating and if she didn't kill him when he beat her daughter(@ poster; bad move) she a'int killing him now!
There's always a price for foolishness!

,amebo no1:

so you expect him to go to her mum and apologise to her anytime the gurl runs to her mama and spreads out the good news of their quarelling abi?

how should he apologise, tell me 'mammi i am sorry for what i did, please forgive'

seriously have we got men in da house here

MoneyRule link=topic=310478.msgl4361464#msg4361464 date=1250437300:

The guy's obviously desperate to get the girl back and she keeps saying "apologise to my mum", though i think it's uncalled for but, let him do it already! So if after he apologizes to the mum, she stalls, then he knows it was never about the apology and can then go get a life. I think it's better than being stuck on one thing.Afterall the mum already knows they were dating and if she didn't kill him when he beat her daughter(@ poster; bad move) she a'int killing him now!
There's always a price for foolishness!

There's a big difference between stalking and beating. He can go to jail for beating but never for stalking and that makes it less a crime. Remember, this is a choice he made (although a wrong one) but if he has to live with the consequence, it's got to be natural and not some disrespectful request. If she feels he's the kind of man she wants to be with, she won't stress him that much. Such lady is mainly out to receive self gratification and she's just egocentric and selfish.

To her it's a honor that he should beg the mom but for what? That's insane. I can't do that. No man in their right senses would do that. If he had engaged in any derogatory act against the mom -- that's different; but this is between the both of them. Let's be reasonably realistic. It should never happen.

If she's still bent on her demand to apologize to her mom, give her some space maybe then she'll realize if she needs you or not. A relationship is complicated enough than for anyone to come and add more pressure to it. Be a man and stand up against this nonsense. Come to think of it, if you didn't love her that much, you wouldn't have done what you did --- but you went on the wrong approach.

Any man who lays his finger on a woman is worse than an animal.