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Can You Disclose Your Salary To Your Spouse? - Family (2) - Nairaland

Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Family / Can You Disclose Your Salary To Your Spouse? (11252 Views)

Poll: Can you?

Yes: 80% (90 votes)
No: 19% (22 votes)
This poll has ended

Disclose Your ATM Password To Your Family. / Can You Disclose Your Exact Monthly Income To Your Partner / Would You Disclose Your Income To Ur Parents/inlaws? (2) (3) (4)

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Re: Can You Disclose Your Salary To Your Spouse? by FBS: 12:44pm On Sep 08, 2009
@Topic: Yes and why not?
Re: Can You Disclose Your Salary To Your Spouse? by Utaroz(m): 12:45pm On Sep 08, 2009
The answer to this depends on the type of spouse one has. Some are good fund managers while some are spend thrifts. A spouse whose motto is that "money is made to be spent" may not be the best confidant on such issues. However, a prudent spouse is the best confidant on your income and investment dynamics.

2 Likes

Re: Can You Disclose Your Salary To Your Spouse? by oge4real(f): 12:46pm On Sep 08, 2009
Sure I will.
Re: Can You Disclose Your Salary To Your Spouse? by FBS: 12:47pm On Sep 08, 2009
Utaroz:

The answer to this depends on the type of spouse one has. Some are good fund managers while some are spend thrifts. A spouse whose motto is that "money is made to be spent" may not be the best confidant on such issues. However, a prudent spouse is the best confidant on your income and investment dynamics.
You have a point.  wink
Re: Can You Disclose Your Salary To Your Spouse? by okito: 12:59pm On Sep 08, 2009
She was with me the day i collected my 1st appointment letter, that was even before we got married. She s aware of the subsequent increaments i have gotten and the one am expecting anytime soon. When a couple sincerely plan to have a great future together it's expedient that they know each other's earnings. That way you mutually progress faster, i ve been there.

1 Like

Re: Can You Disclose Your Salary To Your Spouse? by emiemi(f): 1:04pm On Sep 08, 2009
What kind of question is this? What are you talking about? IS it a boyfriend/gfriend thingy or marriage?

Both parties ought not to hide anything from each other (not to talk about salary/increments/promotion).

This is the ideal thing and it will help foster trust, and love y'know. The spending on the other hand is a

different issue altogether. There has to be mutual agreements on what to contribute on a monthly basis
by each person.
Re: Can You Disclose Your Salary To Your Spouse? by GeeCee(m): 1:08pm On Sep 08, 2009
What exactly does d disclosure achieve? IMO, d most important thing is me taking care of my responsibilities at home. If there is anyway she can help, let her do. If there is anytime i need her assistance, i shuld be able to ask for it and not being too 'manly' to ask. And she shuld not make any yanga wen i ask for her help. For all i care she can do wateva she wants with her money.
Re: Can You Disclose Your Salary To Your Spouse? by kabola2009(m): 1:11pm On Sep 08, 2009
Their is no big deal in letting my spouse know how much i earn but i don't encourage joint account
Re: Can You Disclose Your Salary To Your Spouse? by MrKelly: 1:17pm On Sep 08, 2009
We've tried to build our marriage on trust, sincerity and fear of God. If I fail to disclose my income to my wife, it means I'm not sincere and I'm not trustworthy.
Re: Can You Disclose Your Salary To Your Spouse? by knight4u(m): 1:29pm On Sep 08, 2009
I'm really impressed by the responses on this topic; especially men. it shows we have some matured men in the house. smiley
Re: Can You Disclose Your Salary To Your Spouse? by larimo(m): 1:31pm On Sep 08, 2009
one should. it strengthens the union cos there would not be secrets. wisdom should however still be considered when one knows that telling your wife would have adverse/unseen effects on the family based on her personality.
Re: Can You Disclose Your Salary To Your Spouse? by Eaglebabe: 1:47pm On Sep 08, 2009
I want to ask,would you want your wife to disclose her income to you?
Re: Can You Disclose Your Salary To Your Spouse? by rickie4us(m): 1:53pm On Sep 08, 2009
larimo:

one should. it strengthens the union cos there would not be secrets. wisdom should however still be considered when one knows that telling your wife would have adverse/unseen effects on the family based on her personality.



HMMMMM
Re: Can You Disclose Your Salary To Your Spouse? by koolchicco: 1:56pm On Sep 08, 2009
As for me,the question will be,can she disclose her salary to me?Afterall she dey earn pass me! lipsrsealed
Re: Can You Disclose Your Salary To Your Spouse? by Chi4nelo(f): 2:03pm On Sep 08, 2009
Is this topic strictly for the married? I was wondering if i can say somtin.
Re: Can You Disclose Your Salary To Your Spouse? by Tmoni(m): 2:03pm On Sep 08, 2009
Well my girlfriend and I both know what each other earns, we even know the amount of direct debits on each other's accounts, and i plan to leave it that way when we even get married (Insha Allah),

Helps us plan  for everything, cool
Re: Can You Disclose Your Salary To Your Spouse? by OvieE: 2:07pm On Sep 08, 2009
I want my wife to know how much I earn and I want to know how much she earns. That show a good foundation in marriage. We will have join account and also have separate account for individual use. The join account will be account we will use to execute anything back home, like buying our house and buying a car and keep back home/Nigeria and also to set up business. The separate account be use to help our family back home, go to shopping anytime etc. Being hornest is the only way a marriage will succeed. money is the root of all evil. If we do not enjoy our life as husband and wife because of money, what makes you think that the next person you meet will not keep things away from you? Marriage suppose to be a thing were spouse working together because what you do today will follow your children and your children children follow their foot-step. Trust, hornest, faithful brings happiness.
Re: Can You Disclose Your Salary To Your Spouse? by Biliamin(m): 2:07pm On Sep 08, 2009
What is the essence of the marriage if you are still keeping any secret from each other.

I beg, you are not meant to be together if you do that.
Re: Can You Disclose Your Salary To Your Spouse? by Piedpiper(m): 2:09pm On Sep 08, 2009
always have always will.
Re: Can You Disclose Your Salary To Your Spouse? by Theblessed(f): 2:10pm On Sep 08, 2009
[b]WHY NOT?  You see, with this kind of behaviour you are stiring up serious marital problems here. 'DISRESPECTING' the person you propose to love is not fun, maybe to youoooo!.  Respect they say, goes both ways and, it surely does.  How could a husband expect his wife to respect him when he is so secretive and dishonest with their family affairs?  But hang on, let's turn the Table now and see what we could find Assuming your wife takes up your role as the breadwinner of your household and keep you in the dark about her salary as you have done, wouldn't you love it Ahaaaaaaa!  He would love it.  Treat people the way you would like to be treated that's, the moral code.  By keeping this kind of secret, it suggests to any sensible person on N/L that there are 1million and ten other things you are hiding from her.  But how could you expect love, harmony, peace and tranquillity to thrive in this kind of environment?

You should thank your God the woman in your live seem to be a dormant housewife.  Assuming I am your wife (thank God I'm not and thank your star for your wife, really!), you would have known there are two types of water (HOT AND COLD WATER ) angry angry angry You see, it is not funny to me and anyone can laugh about this.  I hate lies and deceit especially in a relationship.  Guy, you are so, so lucky!  Sure you'd never play these games with SMART WOMEN.   For the sake of peace and rest of mind in your household, enjoy this FREEDOM now 'cos, it might not last unless your wife has no ambitions of her own and is happy to remains dormant in her married life otherwise, your would have learnt never to disrespect your life partner this way.

Because, you provide her with this and that, gave you the audacity to marginalise and treat her like a child, eh! Just wait, this your child-wife will grow up one day and when she does, you will know.  Thank God, Nigeria is developing fast in this area of things and you selfish and wicked husbands/boyfriends, will soon learn your lessons.
[/b]
Re: Can You Disclose Your Salary To Your Spouse? by bebe4u(f): 2:36pm On Sep 08, 2009
I will not disclose how much i earn, but he will disclose his own to me, afterall they say its a man world so i need to know how much he earns to model his obligatory family commitments, and i can support him with whatever i have.
Re: Can You Disclose Your Salary To Your Spouse? by lambalamb(m): 2:38pm On Sep 08, 2009
yes of course, as far as love is selfless! and only a selfish person will not be able to do that.
Re: Can You Disclose Your Salary To Your Spouse? by sweetpain: 2:43pm On Sep 08, 2009
That is the biggest mistake any man can ever make. And this mistake unlike others does not have any remedy. Provide for your spouse as much as your income will allow. Full stop. Dont go inviting complications.
Re: Can You Disclose Your Salary To Your Spouse? by sirt1(m): 3:15pm On Sep 08, 2009
bebe4u:

[b][b][b][b][b]I will not disclose how much i earn, but he will disclose his own to me[/b][/b][/b][/b][/b], afterall they say its a man world so i need to know how much he earns to model his obligatory family commitments, and i can support him with whatever i have.

What a selfish lady? I pity ur husband/would be husband.

For me, it is compulsory to disclose everything to ur spouse including ur income.
Re: Can You Disclose Your Salary To Your Spouse? by hackney(m): 3:16pm On Sep 08, 2009
Only my boss knows how much i earn.
Not telling your wife is not an indication of trust issues.
It's just a need to have a level of privacy.

After all, why would she even need to know about every single penny?
All she needs to know is when you inform her that either you can afford something or not.
As long as the family is thriving financially, i dont see the need for all the details.
But then that's just me. . . . . .
Re: Can You Disclose Your Salary To Your Spouse? by oluagness(m): 3:28pm On Sep 08, 2009
My gfriend knows everything about me. It is good to be free but very careful in everything.
Re: Can You Disclose Your Salary To Your Spouse? by LaNiger(m): 3:32pm On Sep 08, 2009
It is important that you are your spouse are on the same page.  The bible says "Shall two walk together except they be agreed?"

My wife knew how much I made before we got married, we have joint accounts and individual accounts.  She has access to every account and has all my passwords and atm pin.  It is essential that marriage is built on trust and that is how we have managed to keep our marriage working.

Most importantly there is peace in our home, although I manage the finances, she trusts my judgement in these area and she knows that I am financially prudent.

I believe in full disclosure, although difficult it is very necessary.
Re: Can You Disclose Your Salary To Your Spouse? by sayso: 3:43pm On Sep 08, 2009
Men are losing their value,I will tell her everything,my girlfriend knows all,she was there when my salary was increased and so on,keep talking and what happened when you took that oat in church/court.A man must have principles people and make sure you do your duties,do not fail in your duties in any form as a man.am warning you now, do not start life that way.Her heart is an ocean of deep secrets not minding the love.Did I mention am married with 2 boys and still she does not know anything about my salary but I make investments for her and the kids for their future that is my responsibility.
Re: Can You Disclose Your Salary To Your Spouse? by djpalapala(m): 3:47pm On Sep 08, 2009
Its a question that always crop up at most gatherings and the answers you get can be very revealing especially of the personality of the one talking. Just as the personlaities of those commenting on this topic is showing. The simple answer to this question is YES, I can disclose what my salary is to my spouse. Apart from the benefits other NLs have posted, I want to state this, if your spouse knows how much you earn, it will be very unlikely for her to demand for what you do not have. For a home to be free from money rancour, it is best to be open when it comes to finance in the home.

1 Like

Re: Can You Disclose Your Salary To Your Spouse? by Nezan(m): 3:50pm On Sep 08, 2009
Yes!
Re: Can You Disclose Your Salary To Your Spouse? by lastpage: 3:55pm On Sep 08, 2009
@theblessed

You should thank your God the woman in your live seem to be a dormant housewife.  Assuming I am your wife (thank God I'm not and thank your star for your wife, really!), you would have known there are two types of water (HOT AND COLD WATER ) Angry Angry Angry You see, it is not funny to me and anyone can laugh about this.  I hate lies and deceit especially in a relationship.  Guy, you are so, so lucky!  Sure you'd never play these games with SMART WOMEN.   For the sake of peace and rest of mind in your household, enjoy this FREEDOM now 'cos, it might not last unless your wife has no ambitions of her own and is happy to remains dormant in her married life otherwise, your would have learnt never to disrespect your life partner this way.

Because, you provide her with this and that, gave you the a[b]udacity to marginalise[/b] and treat her like a child, eh! Just wait, this your child-wife will grow up one day and when she does, you will know.  Thank God, Nigeria is developing fast in this area of things and you selfish and wicked husbands/boyfriends, will soon learn your lessons.

Ma Shista, no be fight now, unungo?
See grammar, see Police, see lawyer, see judge, see appeal!  grin cool

Anyway, thats how you feel, and its your right to feel as you like!

BTW, l want to make a general observation:

When a man loves his wife and is ready to do anything for her, hold her bags, open doors for her, sweep, cook and wash for her,do her biddings and both are generally happy with each other, e.t.c, some third-party person, MEN especially would refer to the man as "stupid, Woman-wrapper, weak man, mugun or that Juju is working on his brain  grin and all sorts of dissings like that!

The other side of the coin is when a woman loves her man and does not question his authority nor challenge his place in the household, she generally will do what pleases him, some third-party persons, especially women will call her "village-wife, child-wife, mumu, bush-woman, uneducated, uncivilized, unenlightened, dormant, dumb, unexposed, unambitious, e.t.c"! embarassed

Could it be that some have taken it to be their right to "set the rules" on how a husband and wife must relate and anything other than that is viewed negatively? Why cant people just mind their business and let husband and wife decide what is best for them instead of trying to influence one against the other?
And if per-chance, this same spouse should change to the opposite, some other groups will start the name-calling!

Feel free to comment on this, man or woman, take your side grin

@xstdreason
D biggest mistake i eva made in my life is to let my spouse knw hw much i earn,

The whole house is waiting for d salacious, juicy details please!
Ameebooo! wink

Lastpage
Re: Can You Disclose Your Salary To Your Spouse? by Theblessed(f): 4:11pm On Sep 08, 2009
hackney:

Only my boss knows how much i earn.
Not telling your wife is not an indication of trust issues.
It's just a need to have a level of privacy.

After all, why would she even need to know about every single penny?
All she needs to know is when you inform her that either you can afford something or not.
As long as the[b] family is thriving financially,[/b] i dont see the need for all the details.
But then that's just me. . . . . .  

Based on your comment above, I disagree with you.  I know your live in the Uk and based on this fact, this issue is so easy.  It seems to me your wife does not know her rights and probably, does not know how to find out.  I suggest she write your Boss and HR Department requesting full and complete information about your salary. If they fail to provide that, she should go through her solicitors and you all will sh-t.  You know, there are lots of things she could cite for the NEED TO KNOW then, you will realise you are dealing with a clever woman and never again play this childish game.  I don't blame you guys for doing this to women, I blame it on the MUGGU women who don't know their left and right and would not ask for help to open their eyes.  I am really angry with them because they keep letting us down, all the time.

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