Welcome, Guest: Register On Nairaland / LOGIN! / Trending / Recent / New
Stats: 3,150,730 members, 7,809,803 topics. Date: Friday, 26 April 2024 at 03:13 PM

GOING THROUGH A DEVASTATING BREAK UP. Please Help Me Friends!! Am Dying Silently - Romance (11) - Nairaland

Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Romance / GOING THROUGH A DEVASTATING BREAK UP. Please Help Me Friends!! Am Dying Silently (61848 Views)

Help I Am Dying Of High Libido Nairalander Shouts out / I am dying , Dis Shocking Tin Apuns Weneva My Boifrnd Is Abt 2 Erupt During S*x / Genotype Silently Killing Relationships (2) (3) (4)

(1) (2) (3) ... (8) (9) (10) (11) (12) (13) (14) ... (18) (Reply) (Go Down)

Re: GOING THROUGH A DEVASTATING BREAK UP. Please Help Me Friends!! Am Dying Silently by Cosmicgeek: 4:51am On Jun 25, 2016
Hi Bro,

First let me tell u that I know exactly what you're going through. Something similar happened to me but in my own case, she was cheating on me with my friend.

I thought I was gonna die.. Best decision I took was to share some part of the story with my Mum and I gotta admit it was the best decision I ever took.

You need someone to help share the pain with. Someone whom would comfort you and care for you and please don't let it be another female that isn't blood.

Because chances are you'll probably want to replace your girlfriends love and affection with anyone available almost immediately.

You'll need time to heal but think of it this way... God has a way of showing us what's good and bad for us. He just showed you this woman's true color and you're sad.. What if u were already married to her? What if u guys had children you now realize the kids ain't yours?

There are so many things to be thankful for Bro. And if you need someone to talk to, feel free to respond to my message.
Have a great day and stay alive!
Re: GOING THROUGH A DEVASTATING BREAK UP. Please Help Me Friends!! Am Dying Silently by teozey111(m): 4:51am On Jun 25, 2016
hahaha grin grin grin grin cheesy u be idiot of d highest order\\\\\because of kpenkus?grow up bro angry angry
Re: GOING THROUGH A DEVASTATING BREAK UP. Please Help Me Friends!! Am Dying Silently by Heineken(m): 4:53am On Jun 25, 2016
Sugarhugs:


1. You don't love yourself for you to be spending much on q girl you are not married to.

2. You are too nice.

3. You need to grow up and get some sense.

4. If you die of such useless cause, nobody gives a Bleep apart from making your family sad and run unnecessary expenses.

So son, the is in ya court. Find another girl. Don't be stupid.
may God bless you beauty.
Re: GOING THROUGH A DEVASTATING BREAK UP. Please Help Me Friends!! Am Dying Silently by WAGAZ: 4:57am On Jun 25, 2016
Re: GOING THROUGH A DEVASTATING BREAK UP. Please Help Me Friends!! Am Dying Silently by Nobody: 4:59am On Jun 25, 2016
Stop taking the anti depressants. They may be the reason for your hitting rock bottom so often. They are addictive.

That doesn't sound like a good enough reason to kill yourself. You probably just need a good enough reason to live. Like a purpose.
Re: GOING THROUGH A DEVASTATING BREAK UP. Please Help Me Friends!! Am Dying Silently by Heineken(m): 5:00am On Jun 25, 2016
Pushas:
Op, take heart. First of all, no woman on earth can love you like your mother did let that stick in your head.
You were too invested in her, you were a nice guy which bored her and bro Pls have a life outside women. Do not make any Woman your life mission. Develop yourself. Get a hobby, join a Gym BE BUSY.
Let me tell you this she does not love you and she never loved you. You were just a meal ticket, maga, a source of free gifts. Always have options with women don't depend on one and bro LOVE DOES NOT EXIST. Don't overinvest in any woman. In any relationship always put yourself first. please make sure your happiness is not tied to any woman except your mother or family.
Lastly don't be a nice guy to women.
may God bless you bro.. You're very sharp. There's no love.. And one thing I know and love telling my friends is that when it comes to women, they must have back ups. When one fumble, pick another sharply. She won't even try fyvkin up knowing fully well that she's not the only one. This thing nearly happen to me bro during my nysc days but I sharply forget that birch of a girl and another girl enter sharply. There's no time to love anyhow. I like your comment bro

1 Like 1 Share

Re: GOING THROUGH A DEVASTATING BREAK UP. Please Help Me Friends!! Am Dying Silently by Heineken(m): 5:03am On Jun 25, 2016
Cosmicgeek:
Hi Bro,

First let me tell u that I know exactly what you're going through. Something similar happened to me but in my own case, she was cheating on me with my friend.

I thought I was gonna die.. Best decision I took was to share some part of the story with my Mum and I gotta admit it was the best decision I ever took.

You need someone to help share the pain with. Someone whom would comfort you and care for you and please don't let it be another female that isn't blood.

Because chances are you'll probably want to replace your girlfriends love and affection with anyone available almost immediately.

You'll need time to heal but think of it this way... God has a way of showing us what's good and bad for us. He just showed you this woman's true color and you're sad.. What if u were already married to her? What if u guys had children you now realize the kids ain't yours?

There are so many things to be thankful for Bro. And if you need someone to talk to, feel free to respond to my message.
Have a great day and stay alive!
nawao.. Girls are bad news sha.
Re: GOING THROUGH A DEVASTATING BREAK UP. Please Help Me Friends!! Am Dying Silently by Jimmycrown: 5:03am On Jun 25, 2016
amaraedec:
I have not spoken to anyone about my ordeal but I sincerely hope your advice will go a long way towards healing me and restoring back my sanity.

I started dating this lady whom I still love so much February 2013, few months before I lost my mummy. I was so cautious of the affair at first, knowing that it was the first time I am getting so emotionally entangled to a lady, but after I lost my mum, I was so hurt and the fact that she was the only person very close to me then, I threw caution to the wind and fell helplessly in love with her, hoping that it would help alleviate the pains of losing My mum and praying deep inside my heart that the relationship will lead to marriage. It did to a reasonable extent alleviated the pains of losing my mum.

Even while I was in school, I gave her everything that I somehow lived in deprivation. Her friends were complaining to me that I spend a lot on her and it might backfire one day. I ignored their advice. I buy her handouts, clothes, Mobile gadgets and even give her certain amount of money on monthly basis to add up to her feeding money, I made sure she lived above her peers in school .

The whole problem started late 2014, when I was about leaving for my NYSC. she started acting quite strange, I respected her privacy that I don't even touch her phones, even though I give her the freedom to handle my phones and answer my calls. I noticed she wouldn't pick up her calls while with me. Like I said, I respected her privacy that I never gave so much thoughts into her actions, I loved and gave her my all believing that she will never cheat on me. Then on her birthday, I had got lots of surprising gifts for her and even arranged a little get together without her knowledge. To my greatest surprise, she surfaced at the venue of the party with the excuse that she was going on an errand for her parents. I handed over to her the gifts I got for her, she collected them and left the venue. Little did I know she had gone to see her erstwhile lover. Depression had started creeping in and I was losing my sanity apparently.

To cut the whole story short, when her girlfriend opened up to me that my girl was having affairs elsewhere, I never believed her at first, but after I confronted her, then I was looking so sick and pale, completely lost in thoughts and pains. She eventually opened up and was really sorry to the best of my knowledge . I couldn't help the pains, I. Started taking anti depressants, I have already vowed never to cheat in my life, knowing that prosperity has a way of rewarding Fidelity.

After I was mobilized for NYSC, I left for my Camp, but the ghost of a failed relationship was already hunting me, I had lost interest in living. Shortly after I returned back from my Orientation camp, everyone knew something was wrong with me, I only told them that it was the stress from Camp. Well, I was battered emotionally, that on 31st December 2014, I hit the rock button and decided to end my life and end the pains, I took insecticides and collection of anti depressants in over dose and battery acid, I cheated on death as I was in Coma for 4 days, I was referred to a psychologist for rehabilitation after I was discharged on the 12th of January 2015. I spent 6 months in rehabilitation Center here in Lagos State, where I was also serving then.

After the whole incident, I made up my mind to forgive her and give her a second chance since she was really sorry. The whole scenario started replaying itself, that she started acting strange again, already my friend had told me that she was seeing someone else. My family knew I was slipping into depression again and had wanted to fly me out of the country, but I was denied Visa when I least expected it. I had to leave Enugu for Lagos so as to keep away from her and the environment. but she still calls me on phone, saying that she still loves me, I truly love her so much. Am totally lost of words, lost of ideas. Am terrified to say the least. Am losing my sanity again. Please friends, depression is getting better of me at the moment.. I need a sincere advise
guy u tell you say the girl truly love you. Don't kill yourself because of woman. Full stop
Re: GOING THROUGH A DEVASTATING BREAK UP. Please Help Me Friends!! Am Dying Silently by Heineken(m): 5:11am On Jun 25, 2016
lefulefu:
This is why its important to have more than one gf.if d first one dey mess up then u leave her and move on wit d nxt one.no jus go commit suicide on top woman matter oo.fyne women boku everywere.
God bless you
Re: GOING THROUGH A DEVASTATING BREAK UP. Please Help Me Friends!! Am Dying Silently by Heineken(m): 5:14am On Jun 25, 2016
covbrand:



you always speak like a kid that knows nothing about emotional discipline. who tells their next that their ex was their true love? NOBODY IS IRREPLACEABLE. and op, people only hurt you when you give them that power, learn to love with a healthy level of detachment. when I was younger I always felt showing people how much you loved them was the trick to keeping them,but the older you grow the more you realise that NOBODY loves an over expressive person. Op as for that lady, leave her because she has already lost respect for you, no amount of begging can correct that. this is the best time to find yourself and know what you want, pain is one of the fastest way to aquire maturity. I pray God gives you the fortitude to grow. more grace.
mehn you get brain dear.. God bless you. I dey learn
Re: GOING THROUGH A DEVASTATING BREAK UP. Please Help Me Friends!! Am Dying Silently by Nobody: 5:16am On Jun 25, 2016
amaraedec:
I have not spoken to anyone about my ordeal but I sincerely hope your advice will go a long way towards healing me and restoring back my sanity.

I started dating this lady whom I still love so much February 2013, few months before I lost my mummy. I was so cautious of the affair at first, knowing that it was the first time I am getting so emotionally entangled to a lady, but after I lost my mum, I was so hurt and the fact that she was the only person very close to me then, I threw caution to the wind and fell helplessly in love with her, hoping that it would help alleviate the pains of losing My mum and praying deep inside my heart that the relationship will lead to marriage. It did to a reasonable extent alleviated the pains of losing my mum.

Even while I was in school, I gave her everything that I somehow lived in deprivation. Her friends were complaining to me that I spend a lot on her and it might backfire one day. I ignored their advice. I buy her handouts, clothes, Mobile gadgets and even give her certain amount of money on monthly basis to add up to her feeding money, I made sure she lived above her peers in school .

The whole problem started late 2014, when I was about leaving for my NYSC. she started acting quite strange, I respected her privacy that I don't even touch her phones, even though I give her the freedom to handle my phones and answer my calls. I noticed she wouldn't pick up her calls while with me. Like I said, I respected her privacy that I never gave so much thoughts into her actions, I loved and gave her my all believing that she will never cheat on me. Then on her birthday, I had got lots of surprising gifts for her and even arranged a little get together without her knowledge. To my greatest surprise, she surfaced at the venue of the party with the excuse that she was going on an errand for her parents. I handed over to her the gifts I got for her, she collected them and left the venue. Little did I know she had gone to see her erstwhile lover. Depression had started creeping in and I was losing my sanity apparently.

To cut the whole story short, when her girlfriend opened up to me that my girl was having affairs elsewhere, I never believed her at first, but after I confronted her, then I was looking so sick and pale, completely lost in thoughts and pains. She eventually opened up and was really sorry to the best of my knowledge . I couldn't help the pains, I. Started taking anti depressants, I have already vowed never to cheat in my life, knowing that prosperity has a way of rewarding Fidelity.

After I was mobilized for NYSC, I left for my Camp, but the ghost of a failed relationship was already hunting me, I had lost interest in living. Shortly after I returned back from my Orientation camp, everyone knew something was wrong with me, I only told them that it was the stress from Camp. Well, I was battered emotionally, that on 31st December 2014, I hit the rock button and decided to end my life and end the pains, I took insecticides and collection of anti depressants in over dose and battery acid, I cheated on death as I was in Coma for 4 days, I was referred to a psychologist for rehabilitation after I was discharged on the 12th of January 2015. I spent 6 months in rehabilitation Center here in Lagos State, where I was also serving then.

After the whole incident, I made up my mind to forgive her and give her a second chance since she was really sorry. The whole scenario started replaying itself, that she started acting strange again, already my friend had told me that she was seeing someone else. My family knew I was slipping into depression again and had wanted to fly me out of the country, but I was denied Visa when I least expected it. I had to leave Enugu for Lagos so as to keep away from her and the environment. but she still calls me on phone, saying that she still loves me, I truly love her so much. Am totally lost of words, lost of ideas. Am terrified to say the least. Am losing my sanity again. Please friends, depression is getting better of me at the moment.. I need a sincere advise
end d relationship n delete everything dat wil remind u of her. Go out n have fun,u Neva can tell who God will bring your way to compensate u
Re: GOING THROUGH A DEVASTATING BREAK UP. Please Help Me Friends!! Am Dying Silently by Heineken(m): 5:19am On Jun 25, 2016
torqque7:
Hmmm I feel your pain tho..we've all been through heartbreaks and it's no fun at all but you need to understand that she is NOT worth it..you are not even dead yet and she is cheating and hurting you already so do you think it will get better when you kill yourself?my brother she will be under another guy screaming his name on the day of your burial so ask yourself who is at a loss here?

Maxti is right..unfortunately never fall in love completely with ANY woman as a man cos you'll get burnt badly..love is sweet but our girls have turned it into a cat and mouse game of survival of the fitest..be smart meet other females,get laid,hell fvck prostitutes if necessary just get other females in your life so you can forget the bi.tch and you'll be OK,trust me when I tell you there are tons of females out there FAR better than her in EVERY aspect of life,and you will meet one again that will make you believe in love again dn't worry,it's just a matter of time. .

Remember no sentiments attached o if you want to survive this game of emotions..drop that idea that you can't cheat on her and stop the good boy routine cos that's your major problem..Good luck Bro.
correct guy

2 Likes

Re: GOING THROUGH A DEVASTATING BREAK UP. Please Help Me Friends!! Am Dying Silently by olu77(m): 5:25am On Jun 25, 2016
iPopAlomo:
Depression is real, depression is a dark place... Sank into one last month for 0.01 second and vowed never to return... I now understand depression better... Be strong OP... Live life and be hopeful... Optimism has its perks... They keep you afloat... Keep your chin up and don't drink as alcohol is a temporary fix... Yeah i pop alomo but i haven't popped one in six months... All in all... Stay safe...

Yeah... Shag a few girls... You spread your emotions everywhere and become a Yoruba Demon... Like me... grin... I crack joke... Haha...

Bro, I don't understand your signature They threw one overboard how did that light up the boat??
Re: GOING THROUGH A DEVASTATING BREAK UP. Please Help Me Friends!! Am Dying Silently by otipoju(m): 5:25am On Jun 25, 2016
amaraedec:
I have not spoken to anyone about my ordeal but I sincerely hope your advice will go a long way towards healing me and restoring back my sanity.

I started dating this lady whom I still love so much February 2013, few months before I lost my mummy. I was so cautious of the affair at first, knowing that it was the first time I am getting so emotionally entangled to a lady, but after I lost my mum, I was so hurt and the fact that she was the only person very close to me then, I threw caution to the wind and fell helplessly in love with her, hoping that it would help alleviate the pains of losing My mum and praying deep inside my heart that the relationship will lead to marriage. It did to a reasonable extent alleviated the pains of losing my mum.

Even while I was in school, I gave her everything that I somehow lived in deprivation. Her friends were complaining to me that I spend a lot on her and it might backfire one day. I ignored their advice. I buy her handouts, clothes, Mobile gadgets and even give her certain amount of money on monthly basis to add up to her feeding money, I made sure she lived above her peers in school .

The whole problem started late 2014, when I was about leaving for my NYSC. she started acting quite strange, I respected her privacy that I don't even touch her phones, even though I give her the freedom to handle my phones and answer my calls. I noticed she wouldn't pick up her calls while with me. Like I said, I respected her privacy that I never gave so much thoughts into her actions, I loved and gave her my all believing that she will never cheat on me. Then on her birthday, I had got lots of surprising gifts for her and even arranged a little get together without her knowledge. To my greatest surprise, she surfaced at the venue of the party with the excuse that she was going on an errand for her parents. I handed over to her the gifts I got for her, she collected them and left the venue. Little did I know she had gone to see her erstwhile lover. Depression had started creeping in and I was losing my sanity apparently.

To cut the whole story short, when her girlfriend opened up to me that my girl was having affairs elsewhere, I never believed her at first, but after I confronted her, then I was looking so sick and pale, completely lost in thoughts and pains. She eventually opened up and was really sorry to the best of my knowledge . I couldn't help the pains, I. Started taking anti depressants, I have already vowed never to cheat in my life, knowing that prosperity has a way of rewarding Fidelity.

After I was mobilized for NYSC, I left for my Camp, but the ghost of a failed relationship was already hunting me, I had lost interest in living. Shortly after I returned back from my Orientation camp, everyone knew something was wrong with me, I only told them that it was the stress from Camp. Well, I was battered emotionally, that on 31st December 2014, I hit the rock button and decided to end my life and end the pains, I took insecticides and collection of anti depressants in over dose and battery acid, I cheated on death as I was in Coma for 4 days, I was referred to a psychologist for rehabilitation after I was discharged on the 12th of January 2015. I spent 6 months in rehabilitation Center here in Lagos State, where I was also serving then.

After the whole incident, I made up my mind to forgive her and give her a second chance since she was really sorry. The whole scenario started replaying itself, that she started acting strange again, already my friend had told me that she was seeing someone else. My family knew I was slipping into depression again and had wanted to fly me out of the country, but I was denied Visa when I least expected it. I had to leave Enugu for Lagos so as to keep away from her and the environment. but she still calls me on phone, saying that she still loves me, I truly love her so much. Am totally lost of words, lost of ideas. Am terrified to say the least. Am losing my sanity again. Please friends, depression is getting better of me at the moment.. I need a sincere advise

That girl is poison to your soul. She is going to contact AIDS and infect you with it.

Before you met her, you were able to live, if she is no longer there you will continue to live and your life will be better off without her toxic presence.

She does not love you even if she says so a million times. She still sees you as a source of income.


Love is a verb. ....action speaks louder than words.She says she loves you but allows other men to drill her well back and front while she moans in pleasure and she will tell you she did not enjoy it sef.

Get a grip bro. There are good women out there. Young, intelligent , God loving women looking for good guys like you who will support your dreams all the way.Pray that God should find you one and He will. You deserve more than a LovePeddler.
Re: GOING THROUGH A DEVASTATING BREAK UP. Please Help Me Friends!! Am Dying Silently by Aromas: 5:25am On Jun 25, 2016
HASSANAASIA:
I feel you bruv my guy of five years did the same thing to me but Mehn can't think of ending my life cause of a GUY hell is real bro it's been 5months now getin beter and accepting it's God's fate
Now I belief some guys are also wicked. 5yrs of r/ship and never lead to marriage. Shouldn't better if someone has a shot term r/ship and get married dan wasting unnecessary resources and time. Well, true love is hard 2 find but I belief honest guys and ladies are out dia. Abdulrasaq by name
Re: GOING THROUGH A DEVASTATING BREAK UP. Please Help Me Friends!! Am Dying Silently by luminous1(m): 5:26am On Jun 25, 2016
I understand how you feel. Is good you've travelled far away. In as much as you want to hear her voice, quit picking or busy her calls. She's your lover but a cheat..... Shag someone, go out and avoid being alone till you gain your sanity.
Don't take your life, there are still the good ones out there.
Please take things gently.

#iam a psychologist 07039442226.
Re: GOING THROUGH A DEVASTATING BREAK UP. Please Help Me Friends!! Am Dying Silently by Heineken(m): 5:30am On Jun 25, 2016
missjchinny:
really, some ladies a lucky, need someone that can take his life for my sake. ..mind you I won't give him s reason to consider doing it...all am saying is some girls are lucky to have people that love them that much,
Thats life dear.. Person wey get cap no get head and vice versa. Imagine how this guy love this girl.. Hmmm
Re: GOING THROUGH A DEVASTATING BREAK UP. Please Help Me Friends!! Am Dying Silently by LuckyLadolce(m): 5:35am On Jun 25, 2016
amaraedec:
I have not spoken to anyone about my ordeal but I sincerely hope your advice will go a long way towards healing me and restoring back my sanity.

I started dating this lady whom I still love so much February 2013, few months before I lost my mummy. I was so cautious of the affair at first, knowing that it was the first time I am getting so emotionally entangled to a lady, but after I lost my mum, I was so hurt and the fact that she was the only person very close to me then, I threw caution to the wind and fell helplessly in love with her, hoping that it would help alleviate the pains of losing My mum and praying deep inside my heart that the relationship will lead to marriage. It did to a reasonable extent alleviated the pains of losing my mum.

Even while I was in school, I gave her everything that I somehow lived in deprivation. Her friends were complaining to me that I spend a lot on her and it might backfire one day. I ignored their advice. I buy her handouts, clothes, Mobile gadgets and even give her certain amount of money on monthly basis to add up to her feeding money, I made sure she lived above her peers in school .

The whole problem started late 2014, when I was about leaving for my NYSC. she started acting quite strange, I respected her privacy that I don't even touch her phones, even though I give her the freedom to handle my phones and answer my calls. I noticed she wouldn't pick up her calls while with me. Like I said, I respected her privacy that I never gave so much thoughts into her actions, I loved and gave her my all believing that she will never cheat on me. Then on her birthday, I had got lots of surprising gifts for her and even arranged a little get together without her knowledge. To my greatest surprise, she surfaced at the venue of the party with the excuse that she was going on an errand for her parents. I handed over to her the gifts I got for her, she collected them and left the venue. Little did I know she had gone to see her erstwhile lover. Depression had started creeping in and I was losing my sanity apparently.

To cut the whole story short, when her girlfriend opened up to me that my girl was having affairs elsewhere, I never believed her at first, but after I confronted her, then I was looking so sick and pale, completely lost in thoughts and pains. She eventually opened up and was really sorry to the best of my knowledge . I couldn't help the pains, I. Started taking anti depressants, I have already vowed never to cheat in my life, knowing that prosperity has a way of rewarding Fidelity.

After I was mobilized for NYSC, I left for my Camp, but the ghost of a failed relationship was already hunting me, I had lost interest in living. Shortly after I returned back from my Orientation camp, everyone knew something was wrong with me, I only told them that it was the stress from Camp. Well, I was battered emotionally, that on 31st December 2014, I hit the rock button and decided to end my life and end the pains, I took insecticides and collection of anti depressants in over dose and battery acid, I cheated on death as I was in Coma for 4 days, I was referred to a psychologist for rehabilitation after I was discharged on the 12th of January 2015. I spent 6 months in rehabilitation Center here in Lagos State, where I was also serving then.

After the whole incident, I made up my mind to forgive her and give her a second chance since she was really sorry. The whole scenario started replaying itself, that she started acting strange again, already my friend had told me that she was seeing someone else. My family knew I was slipping into depression again and had wanted to fly me out of the country, but I was denied Visa when I least expected it. I had to leave Enugu for Lagos so as to keep away from her and the environment. but she still calls me on phone, saying that she still loves me, I truly love her so much. Am totally lost of words, lost of ideas. Am terrified to say the least. Am losing my sanity again. Please friends, depression is getting better of me at the moment.. I need a sincere advise
hey bro, she's not ur woman, forget about her. Dnt u ever go back to ur vomit. Never! You're a man. trust me, time heals everything. No matter how much depressed you are, it's a matter of time. You will get over it. Common man! You're a bigboy, get urself engaged with something you love and have so much fun. All the best bro!
Re: GOING THROUGH A DEVASTATING BREAK UP. Please Help Me Friends!! Am Dying Silently by ademola1333(m): 5:35am On Jun 25, 2016
It is a great sin for a believer to commit suicide. For hell fire is the abode for those who commit suicide... the life of this world is temporary... I am an introvert, I don't like sharing my emotional problems with people because they end up making things harder for me.
First thing I think you need to do is to move closer to God. I want you to know that God is Love.
If you are a muslim, search this keyword on google and download: "Caring verses::pdf".
And if you are a christian, get a Deeper Life magazine or material on Love (I think the title is God Is Love).
Re: GOING THROUGH A DEVASTATING BREAK UP. Please Help Me Friends!! Am Dying Silently by graphiti: 5:36am On Jun 25, 2016
Mixty:
@amaraedec
You are a rookie. Only a rookie will fall "helplessly" in love with a girl and give her everything she asks or requests for. You became desperate
When you give a lady all she requests for without noticing corresponding loyalty from her, her interest in you will naturally wane.

[u]As a guy, you have to learn the art of making a lady yearn for you. Becoming too available by always being there at a beck and call will make her lose interest. You should have maintained a balance. You became a conquered territory. It's only natural for her to lose interest.[/u

Now my advice...
Maintain a distance from her for a while till you regain control of your emotions. It's for your own good. It might be for weeks or even months. Stay away till you take charge of your emotions. I understand you love her. But extremities are not good. You almost killed yourself because you became hopelessly and helplessly attached to her. It's very important as a man to think with both your head and heart in matters of love. For now, you think only with your heart. Your brain is currently in the cooler. Once you regain emotional control, you will think clearly and make the right decisions for your future, whether to stay or not.
Of course, I know what I am asking you to do is hard. You will most likely take the easy way out - flowing with your current emotional attachments to her. But you will only subject yourself to more hurt in the future.

In the meantime, relate with other ladies to spread the emotions. Occupy yourself with other activities you love. Spend time with friends and family too. That will take your mind off the pain gradually.


On point with the bolded!



Rookies always believe that if they give women "the world" it would guarantee loyalty/fidelity only to find d same woeman being "grinded" by Tajudeen the driver/Musa the maiguard/Emeka the mechanic who has got virtually nothing to offer her but attention!!!




To please a woman u need to first reason like one. Subconsciously, women cherish communication over gifts!

A woman is controlled by emotions. She will appreciate a #100 earings from a dude she's emotionally attached than a #10million car from someone she doesn't love. To make matters worse, she'll present this same car as a birthday gift to d other guy! Lmfao, Rotf.

Yup! You can buy a man's loyalty with money but not a woman! The best u can achieve with your money is her presence, but deep down, her heart is with that poor bloke!

Guyz plz collect sense.
---------------------------------------


Errrrrm..... OP, bia, do u Blv there's heaven and hell?
Even those who died "normal" deaths are not guaranteed the heaven, how much less d muntulla who used his own hand to kill himself!
The choice is yours. Please go through (1)ww w. divinerevelations.info
(2) ww w.eternal-destinations..com


it contains the Revelations of those who have been privileged to visit heaven and hell!
After going through these sites I Blv u'll be in a better position to decide whether to down that rat poison or not!

Re: GOING THROUGH A DEVASTATING BREAK UP. Please Help Me Friends!! Am Dying Silently by Obas101(m): 5:36am On Jun 25, 2016
amaraedec:
I have not spoken to anyone about my ordeal but I sincerely hope your advice will go a long way towards healing me and restoring back my sanity.

I started dating this lady whom I still love so much February 2013, few months before I lost my mummy. I was so cautious of the affair at first, knowing that it was the first time I am getting so emotionally entangled to a lady, but after I lost my mum, I was so hurt and the fact that she was the only person very close to me then, I threw caution to the wind and fell helplessly in love with her, hoping that it would help alleviate the pains of losing My mum and praying deep inside my heart that the relationship will lead to marriage. It did to a reasonable extent alleviated the pains of losing my mum.

Even while I was in school, I gave her everything that I somehow lived in deprivation. Her friends were complaining to me that I spend a lot on her and it might backfire one day. I ignored their advice. I buy her handouts, clothes, Mobile gadgets and even give her certain amount of money on monthly basis to add up to her feeding money, I made sure she lived above her peers in school .

The whole problem started late 2014, when I was about leaving for my NYSC. she started acting quite strange, I respected her privacy that I don't even touch her phones, even though I give her the freedom to handle my phones and answer my calls. I noticed she wouldn't pick up her calls while with me. Like I said, I respected her privacy that I never gave so much thoughts into her actions, I loved and gave her my all believing that she will never cheat on me. Then on her birthday, I had got lots of surprising gifts for her and even arranged a little get together without her knowledge. To my greatest surprise, she surfaced at the venue of the party with the excuse that she was going on an errand for her parents. I handed over to her the gifts I got for her, she collected them and left the venue. Little did I know she had gone to see her erstwhile lover. Depression had started creeping in and I was losing my sanity apparently.

To cut the whole story short, when her girlfriend opened up to me that my girl was having affairs elsewhere, I never believed her at first, but after I confronted her, then I was looking so sick and pale, completely lost in thoughts and pains. She eventually opened up and was really sorry to the best of my knowledge . I couldn't help the pains, I. Started taking anti depressants, I have already vowed never to cheat in my life, knowing that prosperity has a way of rewarding Fidelity.

After I was mobilized for NYSC, I left for my Camp, but the ghost of a failed relationship was already hunting me, I had lost interest in living. Shortly after I returned back from my Orientation camp, everyone knew something was wrong with me, I only told them that it was the stress from Camp. Well, I was battered emotionally, that on 31st December 2014, I hit the rock button and decided to end my life and end the pains, I took insecticides and collection of anti depressants in over dose and battery acid, I cheated on death as I was in Coma for 4 days, I was referred to a psychologist for rehabilitation after I was discharged on the 12th of January 2015. I spent 6 months in rehabilitation Center here in Lagos State, where I was also serving then.

After the whole incident, I made up my mind to forgive her and give her a second chance since she was really sorry. The whole scenario started replaying itself, that she started acting strange again, already my friend had told me that she was seeing someone else. My family knew I was slipping into depression again and had wanted to fly me out of the country, but I was denied Visa when I least expected it. I had to leave Enugu for Lagos so as to keep away from her and the environment. but she still calls me on phone, saying that she still loves me, I truly love her so much. Am totally lost of words, lost of ideas. Am terrified to say the least. Am losing my sanity again. Please friends, depression is getting better of me at the moment.. I need a sincere advise

Been in your shoes bro.. Took me a year to recover. Advice: I was able to get over it by reasoning logically over it, believe me they never change wot u should realize is that the person you are pynin over for is completely calm in mind, why lose sleep nd think over a girl that is probably having a nyc time maybe even with her new boyfriend. You are not the problem she is you are better off of her. Just focus on your career or whatever you are doing. She is the least among the other girls you will meet later
Re: GOING THROUGH A DEVASTATING BREAK UP. Please Help Me Friends!! Am Dying Silently by Trulie(m): 5:41am On Jun 25, 2016
I feel ur pain and how it aches. it's not easy picking up self when u have defined happiness around the person u never expected to treat u the way u've been treated. You just need to rediscover urself and understand that self love is the best form of love.
Re: GOING THROUGH A DEVASTATING BREAK UP. Please Help Me Friends!! Am Dying Silently by Heineken(m): 5:42am On Jun 25, 2016
Ioannes:


take practical steps:

1. change your phone number and make sure you delete hers.

2. delete your accounts on Facebook, Instagram, Twitter and all social networking site where you can snoop on her and vice versa.

3. Burn all her pictures and delete all her pictures and messages on your phone and laptop.

4. destroy every and any reminder of her in your life, gifts, etc, as well as music you know will remind you of her.

5. Relocate ASAP to another state or country if you can.

6. Get a life, make new friends, male friends only for now.

7. Don't date or be close to any girl for at least two years. very important.

8.channel your extra curricular activities towards learning something new, a new language maybe, or a new skill like playing the guitar or keyboard.

9. Work on your self esteem. Nobody is worth dying for except maybe family members who are dear to you, after all, Jesus has died for all of us, right?

All the best.
bro I love your comment but your nos 7 no too make sense sorry to say. This same thing happened to me during my nysc but what helped me then sharply was that I got another girl the following week and I forgot that rubbi.sh one. Getting a new girl sharply is better but he shouldn't love anyhow.

1 Like 1 Share

Re: GOING THROUGH A DEVASTATING BREAK UP. Please Help Me Friends!! Am Dying Silently by Bollinger(m): 5:46am On Jun 25, 2016
Nasri100:
I stopped reading when you wanted to kill yourself? For what? A woman? Blood, ass and legs? Are you s tupid?

Don't be too harsh. Love is the strongest emotion there is. We all deal with it differently. Probably his first real girlfriend. He'll be tougher the next time around.
Re: GOING THROUGH A DEVASTATING BREAK UP. Please Help Me Friends!! Am Dying Silently by blacknumbia123(m): 5:46am On Jun 25, 2016
I took time to read your message this morning and I felt very sorry for you. What if you had died in that incident, what would you tell your creator, what would have been the faith of your Dad and your siblings. Your dad would for ever regret bringing you to live, your siblings would live in shame, your late mom in her death would regret carrying you for 9months. Common man what were you thinking? Your soo soo hansom and precious to die for a girl. It should be the other way round. Co's we men are scarce GOLD. You don't know your worth that was why you tried that shit. Just try and focus, make it and you will see how girls, beautiful ones for that matter will come crawling for you including your so called lover. Abobi be strong and MAN up. Who love epp
Re: GOING THROUGH A DEVASTATING BREAK UP. Please Help Me Friends!! Am Dying Silently by tomquest: 5:47am On Jun 25, 2016
amaraedec:
I have not spoken to anyone about my ordeal but I sincerely hope your advice will go a long way towards healing me and restoring back my sanity.

I started dating this lady whom I still love so much February 2013, few months before I lost my mummy. I was so cautious of the affair at first, knowing that it was the first time I am getting so emotionally entangled to a lady, but after I lost my mum, I was so hurt and the fact that she was the only person very close to me then, I threw caution to the wind and fell helplessly in love with her, hoping that it would help alleviate the pains of losing My mum and praying deep inside my heart that the relationship will lead to marriage. It did to a reasonable extent alleviated the pains of losing my mum.

Even while I was in school, I gave her everything that I somehow lived in deprivation. Her friends were complaining to me that I spend a lot on her and it might backfire one day. I ignored their advice. I buy her handouts, clothes, Mobile gadgets and even give her certain amount of money on monthly basis to add up to her feeding money, I made sure she lived above her peers in school .

The whole problem started late 2014, when I was about leaving for my NYSC. she started acting quite strange, I respected her privacy that I don't even touch her phones, even though I give her the freedom to handle my phones and answer my calls. I noticed she wouldn't pick up her calls while with me. Like I said, I respected her privacy that I never gave so much thoughts into her actions, I loved and gave her my all believing that she will never cheat on me. Then on her birthday, I had got lots of surprising gifts for her and even arranged a little get together without her knowledge. To my greatest surprise, she surfaced at the venue of the party with the excuse that she was going on an errand for her parents. I handed over to her the gifts I got for her, she collected them and left the venue. Little did I know she had gone to see her erstwhile lover. Depression had started creeping in and I was losing my sanity apparently.

To cut the whole story short, when her girlfriend opened up to me that my girl was having affairs elsewhere, I never believed her at first, but after I confronted her, then I was looking so sick and pale, completely lost in thoughts and pains. She eventually opened up and was really sorry to the best of my knowledge . I couldn't help the pains, I. Started taking anti depressants, I have already vowed never to cheat in my life, knowing that prosperity has a way of rewarding Fidelity.

After I was mobilized for NYSC, I left for my Camp, but the ghost of a failed relationship was already hunting me, I had lost interest in living. Shortly after I returned back from my Orientation camp, everyone knew something was wrong with me, I only told them that it was the stress from Camp. Well, I was battered emotionally, that on 31st December 2014, I hit the rock button and decided to end my life and end the pains, I took insecticides and collection of anti depressants in over dose and battery acid, I cheated on death as I was in Coma for 4 days, I was referred to a psychologist for rehabilitation after I was discharged on the 12th of January 2015. I spent 6 months in rehabilitation Center here in Lagos State, where I was also serving then.

After the whole incident, I made up my mind to forgive her and give her a second chance since she was really sorry. The whole scenario started replaying itself, that she started acting strange again, already my friend had told me that she was seeing someone else. My family knew I was slipping into depression again and had wanted to fly me out of the country, but I was denied Visa when I least expected it. I had to leave Enugu for Lagos so as to keep away from her and the environment. but she still calls me on phone, saying that she still loves me, I truly love her so much. Am totally lost of words, lost of ideas. Am terrified to say the least. Am losing my sanity again. Please friends, depression is getting better of me at the moment.. I need a sincere advise

I can see hundreds of advice already but this is my singular advice:

GET YOUR MIND BUSY WITH SOMETHING ELSE.
Re: GOING THROUGH A DEVASTATING BREAK UP. Please Help Me Friends!! Am Dying Silently by naniawini(f): 5:48am On Jun 25, 2016
Just shut up! Must u talk?
teozey111:
hahaha grin grin grin grin cheesy u be idiot of d highest order\\\\\because of kpenkus?grow up bro angry angry
Re: GOING THROUGH A DEVASTATING BREAK UP. Please Help Me Friends!! Am Dying Silently by wasiu22: 5:50am On Jun 25, 2016
Have seen a lot of pretty ladies who have the dream of being in the
media get rejected for the single reason of having their face disfigured
by their parent ignorantly and i see a lot of people crying for help....
call or whats app us on 0818235120 or visit tribalmarkremoval..co.id/2015/08/feedback-from-users-please-share.html?m=1

Re: GOING THROUGH A DEVASTATING BREAK UP. Please Help Me Friends!! Am Dying Silently by tomquest: 5:55am On Jun 25, 2016
Richy4:
I seriously hate advising people on relationship issues..... The reason why u were in it was to be happy isn't it? If she cheats on u and makes u sad.. why are u still holding on....

You just finished NYSC and u have already started drinking antidepressant drugs at this age. so how long will u continue...

All I kind of feel is that u are looking for someone that will replace your mum or someone that will "mother u" once again but news flash!! there is no girl out there that is ready for that... the best u can get is a best friend who will maybe later be your future wife.

I am really not happy with u for trying to kill yourself.
imagine going for lectures for 4yrs, doing all the horrible assignments in school, all the stress on everyday life. only to throw it away for some girl who is not even miss world or even miss nairaland.
Biko move on...

cool Miss nairaland lol
So guys fit die for miss nairaland?
I think miss dollarland go make berra sense sha.
Re: GOING THROUGH A DEVASTATING BREAK UP. Please Help Me Friends!! Am Dying Silently by blacknumbia123(m): 5:55am On Jun 25, 2016
graphiti:



On point with the bolded!



Rookies always believe that if they give women "the world" it would guarantee loyalty/fidelity only to find d same woeman being "grinded" by Tajudeen the driver/Musa the maiguard/Emeka the mechanic who has got virtually nothing to offer her but attention!!!




To please a woman u need to first reason like one. Subconsciously, women cherish communication over gifts!

A woman is controlled by emotions. She will appreciate a #100 earings from a dude she's emotionally attached than a #10million car from someone she doesn't love. To make matters worse, she'll present this same car as a birthday gift to d other guy! Lmfao, Rotf.

Yup! You can buy a man's loyalty with money but not a woman! The best u can achieve with your money is her presence, but deep down, her heart is with that poor bloke!

Guyz, receive sense!


The first true talk wey I don hear this morning.
Re: GOING THROUGH A DEVASTATING BREAK UP. Please Help Me Friends!! Am Dying Silently by iamlimo(m): 5:56am On Jun 25, 2016
LadyAimy:
Get closer to God/Allah
Excuse me, is the translation necessary? the same way you eulogise Muhammad; the eulogy sounds violent atymz (SAW) like that horror movie... and if you don't put it, well I guess it's punishable by hanging and FYI you should learn to be consistent- its either God or Allah. Stand for what you believe in...

(1) (2) (3) ... (8) (9) (10) (11) (12) (13) (14) ... (18) (Reply)

Slay Queen With 2 Skin Colours. Check Out Her Legs (Photo) / Prostitutes Force Man Without Money To Pay For Sex To Wash Their Clothes (Video) / Masquerade Proposes To Girlfriend In Abia State (Photo)

(Go Up)

Sections: politics (1) business autos (1) jobs (1) career education (1) romance computers phones travel sports fashion health
religion celebs tv-movies music-radio literature webmasters programming techmarket

Links: (1) (2) (3) (4) (5) (6) (7) (8) (9) (10)

Nairaland - Copyright © 2005 - 2024 Oluwaseun Osewa. All rights reserved. See How To Advertise. 166
Disclaimer: Every Nairaland member is solely responsible for anything that he/she posts or uploads on Nairaland.