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GOING THROUGH A DEVASTATING BREAK UP. Please Help Me Friends!! Am Dying Silently - Romance (13) - Nairaland

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Re: GOING THROUGH A DEVASTATING BREAK UP. Please Help Me Friends!! Am Dying Silently by Vincent41(m): 6:46am On Jun 25, 2016
amaraedec:
I have not spoken to anyone about my ordeal but I sincerely hope your advice will go a long way towards healing me and restoring back my sanity.

I started dating this lady whom I still love so much February 2013, few months before I lost my mummy. I was so cautious of the affair at first, knowing that it was the first time I am getting so emotionally entangled to a lady, but after I lost my mum, I was so hurt and the fact that she was the only person very close to me then, I threw caution to the wind and fell helplessly in love with her, hoping that it would help alleviate the pains of losing My mum and praying deep inside my heart that the relationship will lead to marriage. It did to a reasonable extent alleviated the pains of losing my mum.

Even while I was in school, I gave her everything that I somehow lived in deprivation. Her friends were complaining to me that I spend a lot on her and it might backfire one day. I ignored their advice. I buy her handouts, clothes, Mobile gadgets and even give her certain amount of money on monthly basis to add up to her feeding money, I made sure she lived above her peers in school .

The whole problem started late 2014, when I was about leaving for my NYSC. she started acting quite strange, I respected her privacy that I don't even touch her phones, even though I give her the freedom to handle my phones and answer my calls. I noticed she wouldn't pick up her calls while with me. Like I said, I respected her privacy that I never gave so much thoughts into her actions, I loved and gave her my all believing that she will never cheat on me. Then on her birthday, I had got lots of surprising gifts for her and even arranged a little get together without her knowledge. To my greatest surprise, she surfaced at the venue of the party with the excuse that she was going on an errand for her parents. I handed over to her the gifts I got for her, she collected them and left the venue. Little did I know she had gone to see her erstwhile lover. Depression had started creeping in and I was losing my sanity apparently.

To cut the whole story short, when her girlfriend opened up to me that my girl was having affairs elsewhere, I never believed her at first, but after I confronted her, then I was looking so sick and pale, completely lost in thoughts and pains. She eventually opened up and was really sorry to the best of my knowledge . I couldn't help the pains, I. Started taking anti depressants, I have already vowed never to cheat in my life, knowing that prosperity has a way of rewarding Fidelity.

After I was mobilized for NYSC, I left for my Camp, but the ghost of a failed relationship was already hunting me, I had lost interest in living. Shortly after I returned back from my Orientation camp, everyone knew something was wrong with me, I only told them that it was the stress from Camp. Well, I was battered emotionally, that on 31st December 2014, I hit the rock button and decided to end my life and end the pains, I took insecticides and collection of anti depressants in over dose and battery acid, I cheated on death as I was in Coma for 4 days, I was referred to a psychologist for rehabilitation after I was discharged on the 12th of January 2015. I spent 6 months in rehabilitation Center here in Lagos State, where I was also serving then.

After the whole incident, I made up my mind to forgive her and give her a second chance since she was really sorry. The whole scenario started replaying itself, that she started acting strange again, already my friend had told me that she was seeing someone else. My family knew I was slipping into depression again and had wanted to fly me out of the country, but I was denied Visa when I least expected it. I had to leave Enugu for Lagos so as to keep away from her and the environment. but she still calls me on phone, saying that she still loves me, I truly love her so much. Am totally lost of words, lost of ideas. Am terrified to say the least. Am losing my sanity again. Please friends, depression is getting better of me at the moment.. I need a sincere advise

Guy i feel ur pain,i was once in r shoe but the Truth is this:She dont love u and will never...its a sign for u to leave her and move on cos the worst thing u will ever do is to marry such a lady......If u do,she will cheat with even ur Gradner and Gateman...Move on and Pray for a better woman......
U see: Lies,Cheating and Promisciouity is what even God can never take away from Women...99percent of Woman cheats.....So move on.....
Re: GOING THROUGH A DEVASTATING BREAK UP. Please Help Me Friends!! Am Dying Silently by mytym1: 6:48am On Jun 25, 2016
You mean you want to kill urself just because of a girl? Love my foot.
Re: GOING THROUGH A DEVASTATING BREAK UP. Please Help Me Friends!! Am Dying Silently by cindykaey(f): 6:52am On Jun 25, 2016
KangaIye:





Sweetheart let me vote for youwink

Lol...I'm not contesting... You are not eligible to vote sf grin
Re: GOING THROUGH A DEVASTATING BREAK UP. Please Help Me Friends!! Am Dying Silently by mzzhavilah(f): 6:53am On Jun 25, 2016
U will be fine. Don't worri too much on wot u ve lost.d economy is enough to take ur mind off ur current predicament. Look 4 a job get busy d stress will take ur mind off it. If dat doesn't work den look 4 anoda gal and start afresh,dont be scared of starting from scratch. Life's not fair sometimes but den it all matters how we face it and overcome. Conquer! To be candid dear if u die dat gal will only miss d gifts she gets from u and dat will last for a short while. So don't eva tink of suicide cos der is a better mood of escape. And dats moving on.
Re: GOING THROUGH A DEVASTATING BREAK UP. Please Help Me Friends!! Am Dying Silently by KangaIye: 6:59am On Jun 25, 2016
cindykaey:


Lol...I'm not contesting... You are not eligible to vote sf grin





You don't have to contest before I vote for you na. How do you know am not eligible to vote
Re: GOING THROUGH A DEVASTATING BREAK UP. Please Help Me Friends!! Am Dying Silently by Franchise21(m): 7:01am On Jun 25, 2016
amaraedec:
I really appreciate Bro, I have got a job. I don't want this to affect my carreer.

08148114294, you can chat me up on WhatsApp
Taking ur own life! Who b'coms d hero n villain? She'd still end up in another man's house... Make ur mom n family proud. As some ppl earlier stated, change ur num, engage in things dat r pleasing to u. Go out n catch some fun, meet new peeps, with tym u'd surely forget her. This is just a lesson to u, experience dey say is life best teacher. I'd advice u not to try take ur own life cos definitely u know where u'll b going to... All will be well bro
Re: GOING THROUGH A DEVASTATING BREAK UP. Please Help Me Friends!! Am Dying Silently by Heineken(m): 7:02am On Jun 25, 2016
tomquest:


Seriously bro, Nigerian babes prefer badd guys. In fact the badder the better. I learnt this in the university. Women love complicated things, complicated guys so to speak. It keeps them constantly on FBI mode. That's when she will realize that this guy is really hot for other babes to be fuccking him while she sits around and not hold on tightly to her "bird at hand"...

My babe never caught me cheating buh she regularly used to tell me that she knows deep down in her soul that some other Chics are fuccking me and that she'll kill that b1tch if she catches her someday. I usually smiled and say nothing.

That's how to stay alive in Nigerian relationships.

lol you're very correct man. I don't really believe in love. Maybe when am ready to settle down though. I can't even think it.. Kill myself because of a girl? How na... This my gf during my service make me sharp well though I get sense too then.. If you love girls too much, she must fumble except the one wey get sense but you know must of these girls Daft. Actually what affected me then was that you know na I just entered another new place go serve and na she be the first and I no get another girl again except her. I saw one pix atop her WhatsApp with a guy for bed o and them no wear cloth boss. As I see the pix this girl vex say why me go carry her phone. Heavy vex o. Na then I start they sharp cos she too na corper with me then. Omo I change sharply and I get gals over wey I dey York steady. I deleted her nos afterwards. She called after like a month but yemi Don bad. Girls wicked. Back up is the best thang
Re: GOING THROUGH A DEVASTATING BREAK UP. Please Help Me Friends!! Am Dying Silently by chinouka: 7:03am On Jun 25, 2016
You are an African man.The problem now is that you perceive things de Oyibo way.Make friends and choose your partner.Boxing yourself up with her reduces your scope and space.You must free your spirit.Don't see her as the end but rather a lesson.Broaden your view on the issue and know that nobody is perfect. Don't make her de beginning and end of life otherwise you offend God your creator. You Are Warned.
Re: GOING THROUGH A DEVASTATING BREAK UP. Please Help Me Friends!! Am Dying Silently by Joseph4God(m): 7:03am On Jun 25, 2016
hurts to love someone and not be loved in return, but what is more painful is to love someone and never find the courage to let that person know how you feel. Say it in deeds. And in words too!
Maybe God wants us to meet a few wrong people before meeting the right one so that when we finally meet the right person, we will know how to be grateful for that gift. Remember, who is the mother of Success?
Love is when you take away the feeling, the passion, and the romance in a relationship - and find out you still care for that person. This is what the wedding vow is all about.
A sad thing in life is when you meet someone who means a lot to you, only to find out in the end that it was never meant to be and you just have to let go. But remember, you did grow on the way.
When the door of happiness closes, another opens but often we look so long at the closed door that we don't see the one which has been opened for us. Look up & look around.
The best kind of friend is the kind you can sit on a porch and swing with, never say a word, and then walk away feeling like it was the best conversation you've ever had. Yet be reminded, it takes great quantity of time to achieve such depth of understanding beforehand.
It's true that we don't know what we've got until we lose it, but it's also true that we don't know what we've been missing until it arrives. Treasure what we have. Enough is enough.
Giving someone all your love is never an assurance that they'll love you back! Don't expect love in return;just wait for it to grow in their heart. But if it doesn't, be content it grew in yours.
There are things you'd love to hear that you would never hear from the person whom you would like to hear them from, but don't be so deaf as not to hear it from the one who says it from his heart.
Never say goodbye if you still want to try - never give up if you still feel you can go on - never say you don't love a person anymore if you can't let go
Love comes to those who still hope although they've been disappointed; to those who still believe although they've been betrayed; to those who still love although they've been hurt before.
It takes only a minute to get a crush on someone, an hour to like someone and a day to love someone - but it takes a lifetime to forget someone. We loves, because God is love.
Don't go for looks; they can deceive. Don't go for wealth; even that fades away. Go for someone who makes you smile. Because it takes only a smile to make a dark day seem bright.
There are moments in life when you miss someone so much that you just want to pick them from your dreams and hug them for real! That special someone is all destitute Mother Teresa saw on her way in her lifetime.
Dream what you want to dream; go where you want to go; be what you want to be, because you have only one life and one chance to do all the things you want to do. But remember, you are accountable to God.
The best and most beautiful things in this world can neither be seen nor touched, but can be felt with the heart.
Always put yourself in others' shoes. If you feel that it hurts you, it probably hurts the person, too. Don't be so quick to judge.
A careless word may kindle strife; a cruel word may wreck a life; a timely word may level stress; a loving word may heal and bless. Speak less harsh words but more constructive ones.
The beginning of love is to let those we love be just themselves, and not twist them with our own image - otherwise, we love only the reflection of ourselves we find in them.
The happiest of people don't necessarily have the best of everything; they just make the most of everything that comes along their way. God's creation is always good in God's eye!
Happiness is there for those who cry, those who're hurt, those who have searched, and those who have tried, for only they can appreciate the importance of people who have touched their lives.
Love begins with a smile, grows with a kiss and grows further and further with tears. And laughter, too.
The brightest future will always be based on a forgotten past. You can't go on well in life until you let go of your past failures and heartaches.
When you were born, you were crying and everyone around you was smiling. Live your life so that when you die, you're the one who is smiling and everyone around you is crying.
May you have enough happiness to make you sweet and enough hope to make you happy.

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Re: GOING THROUGH A DEVASTATING BREAK UP. Please Help Me Friends!! Am Dying Silently by EwejeOyewole(m): 7:04am On Jun 25, 2016
The best way to find love is to find God
Re: GOING THROUGH A DEVASTATING BREAK UP. Please Help Me Friends!! Am Dying Silently by Nobody: 7:04am On Jun 25, 2016
amaraedec:
Thanks a lot, your advice is priceless
amaraedec:
Thanks a lot, your advice is priceless
Always know that no woman is worth killing yourself for, you are not romeo for the love of god. This same thing happened to me and I was heartbroken, I kept moving on,believing God for the best.
I will advice you to move on and this time completely.
Don't pick her call again, block her in every way you can. Don't let her ruin your self. Tell yourself, "I deserve better". God keep you strong.
Re: GOING THROUGH A DEVASTATING BREAK UP. Please Help Me Friends!! Am Dying Silently by SteveRage: 7:06am On Jun 25, 2016
Guy, i have read tru the advise from the experts in the house and i decided to bring out those i feel are useful in this matter.


''when the wrong people leave your life the right things start happening".

Impacting lives is the best legacy you can live for and not some lover's issues.

You are a rookie. Only a rookie will fall "helplessly" in love with a girl and give her everything she asks or requests for. You became desperate
When you give a lady all she requests for without noticing corresponding loyalty from her, her interest in you will naturally wane.

The girl in question is cheating and is a serial cheater.. The advice for you on situation like this is to move on to the next girl... No matter what you have invested in the relationship, it still doesn't change the fact that she is not your wife! So stop acting like you have no choice!


You are lucky that you discovered this before marrying her.. A cheat is a cheat, killing yourself won't change her!! She even brag to her children that a man once died for her in the future so quit being a mugu and man up!!

The joy of her calling you while you are in a relationship is enough punishment for her.. so quit acting like you have no choice man... You do!! And the fact that there are more beautiful girls with values should be the encouragement you will need to put your life in order man''



If you were not a man before now get up and make your family especially your mummy proud.
There is nothing like love, everything is your mind-made up.
If there was love, when a man dies the wife should die too and when a woman dies the man should pack up too.
So guy stand up and face life with your head.

1 Like

Re: GOING THROUGH A DEVASTATING BREAK UP. Please Help Me Friends!! Am Dying Silently by kherlly(m): 7:07am On Jun 25, 2016
amaraedec:
I have not spoken to anyone about my ordeal but I sincerely hope your advice will go a long way towards healing me and restoring back my sanity.

I started dating this lady whom I still love so much February 2013, few months before I lost my mummy. I was so cautious of the affair at first, knowing that it was the first time I am getting so emotionally entangled to a lady, but after I lost my mum, I was so hurt and the fact that she was the only person very close to me then, I threw caution to the wind and fell helplessly in love with her, hoping that it would help alleviate the pains of losing My mum and praying deep inside my heart that the relationship will lead to marriage. It did to a reasonable extent alleviated the pains of losing my mum.

Even while I was in school, I gave her everything that I somehow lived in deprivation. Her friends were complaining to me that I spend a lot on her and it might backfire one day. I ignored their advice. I buy her handouts, clothes, Mobile gadgets and even give her certain amount of money on monthly basis to add up to her feeding money, I made sure she lived above her peers in school .

The whole problem started late 2014, when I was about leaving for my NYSC. she started acting quite strange, I respected her privacy that I don't even touch her phones, even though I give her the freedom to handle my phones and answer my calls. I noticed she wouldn't pick up her calls while with me. Like I said, I respected her privacy that I never gave so much thoughts into her actions, I loved and gave her my all believing that she will never cheat on me. Then on her birthday, I had got lots of surprising gifts for her and even arranged a little get together without her knowledge. To my greatest surprise, she surfaced at the venue of the party with the excuse that she was going on an errand for her parents. I handed over to her the gifts I got for her, she collected them and left the venue. Little did I know she had gone to see her erstwhile lover. Depression had started creeping in and I was losing my sanity apparently.

To cut the whole story short, when her girlfriend opened up to me that my girl was having affairs elsewhere, I never believed her at first, but after I confronted her, then I was looking so sick and pale, completely lost in thoughts and pains. She eventually opened up and was really sorry to the best of my knowledge . I couldn't help the pains, I. Started taking anti depressants, I have already vowed never to cheat in my life, knowing that prosperity has a way of rewarding Fidelity.

After I was mobilized for NYSC, I left for my Camp, but the ghost of a failed relationship was already hunting me, I had lost interest in living. Shortly after I returned back from my Orientation camp, everyone knew something was wrong with me, I only told them that it was the stress from Camp. Well, I was battered emotionally, that on 31st December 2014, I hit the rock button and decided to end my life and end the pains, I took insecticides and collection of anti depressants in over dose and battery acid, I cheated on death as I was in Coma for 4 days, I was referred to a psychologist for rehabilitation after I was discharged on the 12th of January 2015. I spent 6 months in rehabilitation Center here in Lagos State, where I was also serving then.

After the whole incident, I made up my mind to forgive her and give her a second chance since she was really sorry. The whole scenario started replaying itself, that she started acting strange again, already my friend had told me that she was seeing someone else. My family knew I was slipping into depression again and had wanted to fly me out of the country, but I was denied Visa when I least expected it. I had to leave Enugu for Lagos so as to keep away from her and the environment. but she still calls me on phone, saying that she still loves me, I truly love her so much. Am totally lost of words, lost of ideas. Am terrified to say the least. Am losing my sanity again. Please friends, depression is getting better of me at the moment.. I need a sincere advise


Hey bro,,, i repost this yor issue on a whatsapp group and a lady said she will like to meet you.
Re: GOING THROUGH A DEVASTATING BREAK UP. Please Help Me Friends!! Am Dying Silently by Withambition(m): 7:08am On Jun 25, 2016
amaraedec:
I have not spoken to anyone about my ordeal but I sincerely hope your advice will go a long way towards healing me and restoring back my sanity.

I started dating this lady whom I still love so much February 2013, few months before I lost my mummy. I was so cautious of the affair at first, knowing that it was the first time I am getting so emotionally entangled to a lady, but after I lost my mum, I was so hurt and the fact that she was the only person very close to me then, I threw caution to the wind and fell helplessly in love with her, hoping that it would help alleviate the pains of losing My mum and praying deep inside my heart that the relationship will lead to marriage. It did to a reasonable extent alleviated the pains of losing my mum.

Even while I was in school, I gave her everything that I somehow lived in deprivation. Her friends were complaining to me that I spend a lot on her and it might backfire one day. I ignored their advice. I buy her handouts, clothes, Mobile gadgets and even give her certain amount of money on monthly basis to add up to her feeding money, I made sure she lived above her peers in school .

The whole problem started late 2014, when I was about leaving for my NYSC. she started acting quite strange, I respected her privacy that I don't even touch her phones, even though I give her the freedom to handle my phones and answer my calls. I noticed she wouldn't pick up her calls while with me. Like I said, I respected her privacy that I never gave so much thoughts into her actions, I loved and gave her my all believing that she will never cheat on me. Then on her birthday, I had got lots of surprising gifts for her and even arranged a little get together without her knowledge. To my greatest surprise, she surfaced at the venue of the party with the excuse that she was going on an errand for her parents. I handed over to her the gifts I got for her, she collected them and left the venue. Little did I know she had gone to see her erstwhile lover. Depression had started creeping in and I was losing my sanity apparently.

To cut the whole story short, when her girlfriend opened up to me that my girl was having affairs elsewhere, I never believed her at first, but after I confronted her, then I was looking so sick and pale, completely lost in thoughts and pains. She eventually opened up and was really sorry to the best of my knowledge . I couldn't help the pains, I. Started taking anti depressants, I have already vowed never to cheat in my life, knowing that prosperity has a way of rewarding Fidelity.

After I was mobilized for NYSC, I left for my Camp, but the ghost of a failed relationship was already hunting me, I had lost interest in living. Shortly after I returned back from my Orientation camp, everyone knew something was wrong with me, I only told them that it was the stress from Camp. Well, I was battered emotionally, that on 31st December 2014, I hit the rock button and decided to end my life and end the pains, I took insecticides and collection of anti depressants in over dose and battery acid, I cheated on death as I was in Coma for 4 days, I was referred to a psychologist for rehabilitation after I was discharged on the 12th of January 2015. I spent 6 months in rehabilitation Center here in Lagos State, where I was also serving then.

After the whole incident, I made up my mind to forgive her and give her a second chance since she was really sorry. The whole scenario started replaying itself, that she started acting strange again, already my friend had told me that she was seeing someone else. My family knew I was slipping into depression again and had wanted to fly me out of the country, but I was denied Visa when I least expected it. I had to leave Enugu for Lagos so as to keep away from her and the environment. but she still calls me on phone, saying that she still loves me, I truly love her so much. Am totally lost of words, lost of ideas. Am terrified to say the least. Am losing my sanity again. Please friends, depression is getting better of me at the moment.. I need a sincere advise
Brother...it is well. The best solution is not to contact her again. Don't even pick her call. It worked for me. Read this too...https://www.nairaland.com/3187141/beauty-no-contact-rule#46905744
Re: GOING THROUGH A DEVASTATING BREAK UP. Please Help Me Friends!! Am Dying Silently by SIRKAY98(m): 7:12am On Jun 25, 2016
As i am reading your write up am even upset with you. You want to end your life because of some who does not love you and claimed she does. Yet she still does thesame thing. Please check her for 2things. She may be ogbanje. And if your care is not taking its all regret later..
Re: GOING THROUGH A DEVASTATING BREAK UP. Please Help Me Friends!! Am Dying Silently by zheroes(m): 7:13am On Jun 25, 2016
Am not going to spare you insults. I have been on thisbefore. I Was a fool. But you are a bigger idiot.

If a lady doesn't allow you check her fones just keep fucking hher, never spent a dime on her, because she is definitely cheating on you.
When it happened to me, I just walked away and never had anything to do with her, because if I go to her I will kill her one night so best thing was to leave.

My advice for you: just take yourself to a strippers club to see that any woman making you spend money beyond your comfort zone is actually a LovePeddler, they are no differnt whether you call her you girlfriend, difference is one is more commercialised and public than the other. Its same damage they will do to you pocket.

You took insecticide because of woman? You dey craze for head wella. If you die she will Bleep more dicks even when you are alive she is doing it. If I was any of you brother I will so beat you, then I will take you to the best club in town so you see, you can spend your money with any girl depending on how you bargain.
The only person I die for are those willing to die for me too.
In my own case after going to clubs rather than depression my heart was filled with hate... I mean real hatred for women. I felt used. I would rather you move from depression to hate. You will just die for nothing. 10 kobo cry she will not cry. Be a man, if you are single bleep more girls you will get yourself back fast. And chase more beautiful whores and make yourself feel good fast. Girls are even cheaper these days with the harsh economy.
Re: GOING THROUGH A DEVASTATING BREAK UP. Please Help Me Friends!! Am Dying Silently by Irishrena1(f): 7:14am On Jun 25, 2016
predatorX:


Are you serzly asking "the witch-doctor of NL" that question?
Yeah educate me.
Re: GOING THROUGH A DEVASTATING BREAK UP. Please Help Me Friends!! Am Dying Silently by Wyntah: 7:18am On Jun 25, 2016
You need to realise that what she says is different from what she means with you. She tells you that she is in love with you and you keep taking her back. As long as you show her that you care, she will keep taking advantage of you. Start treating her like you have lost interest in her. Don't give her money or gift again cos that is all she is after. it will hurt like hell but its either that or you hurt your family by dying. try watching comedies or sci fi movies cos romantic movies will only remind you of her. If you can't block her number, put a ring tone of the a dance hall music on her number so that each time she calls you just dance to the song and you won't feel your heart breaking. I hope you pull through.
Re: GOING THROUGH A DEVASTATING BREAK UP. Please Help Me Friends!! Am Dying Silently by mzzhavilah(f): 7:20am On Jun 25, 2016
eightsin:
This is strong.
Op, don't you know no one remains faithful all through a relationship. I wonder why we feel betrayed and sad when we are cheated on even if we do not love the person. Its something we can't really control.


I wonder why we can't even share a pu*sy/d*ck and remain happy.
can u share ur toothbrush or underwear?
Re: GOING THROUGH A DEVASTATING BREAK UP. Please Help Me Friends!! Am Dying Silently by luluosas(m): 7:25am On Jun 25, 2016
My dear, you are only doing yourself harm even when you know that you are eating the forbidden fruit, and you want to continue eating it even if it will cost your life. You see, she had never been your wife and she is still not your wife this moment and you want to die because of one stupid girl out there? Emotional love is no love at all.
Now, I am not pampering you nor scolding you but I have to tell you the bitter truth. Now, get rid of this awful relationship right now. Repent and beg GOD for forgiveness and mercy for your sins of fornication with the girl. If you so loved her the way you claimed, then marry her officially and stop sinning. But let me quickly warn you. Even if you marry her as I have suggested above, it is NOT a guarantee that she will be a faithful wife to you. My dear, leopards don't change their skin, okay. My advice therefore is to cut off every tie with her, face your life squarely outside her, and pray that GOD would give you the wife of your youth. Remember, to be forewarned is to be forearmed. Cheers.
amaraedec:
I have not spoken to anyone about my ordeal but I sincerely hope your advice will go a long way towards healing me and restoring back my sanity.

I started dating this lady whom I still love so much February 2013, few months before I lost my mummy. I was so cautious of the affair at first, knowing that it was the first time I am getting so emotionally entangled to a lady, but after I lost my mum, I was so hurt and the fact that she was the only person very close to me then, I threw caution to the wind and fell helplessly in love with her, hoping that it would help alleviate the pains of losing My mum and praying deep inside my heart that the relationship will lead to marriage. It did to a reasonable extent alleviated the pains of losing my mum.

Even while I was in school, I gave her everything that I somehow lived in deprivation. Her friends were complaining to me that I spend a lot on her and it might backfire one day. I ignored their advice. I buy her handouts, clothes, Mobile gadgets and even give her certain amount of money on monthly basis to add up to her feeding money, I made sure she lived above her peers in school .

The whole problem started late 2014, when I was about leaving for my NYSC. she started acting quite strange, I respected her privacy that I don't even touch her phones, even though I give her the freedom to handle my phones and answer my calls. I noticed she wouldn't pick up her calls while with me. Like I said, I respected her privacy that I never gave so much thoughts into her actions, I loved and gave her my all believing that she will never cheat on me. Then on her birthday, I had got lots of surprising gifts for her and even arranged a little get together without her knowledge. To my greatest surprise, she surfaced at the venue of the party with the excuse that she was going on an errand for her parents. I handed over to her the gifts I got for her, she collected them and left the venue. Little did I know she had gone to see her erstwhile lover. Depression had started creeping in and I was losing my sanity apparently.

To cut the whole story short, when her girlfriend opened up to me that my girl was having affairs elsewhere, I never believed her at first, but after I confronted her, then I was looking so sick and pale, completely lost in thoughts and pains. She eventually opened up and was really sorry to the best of my knowledge . I couldn't help the pains, I. Started taking anti depressants, I have already vowed never to cheat in my life, knowing that prosperity has a way of rewarding Fidelity.

After I was mobilized for NYSC, I left for my Camp, but the ghost of a failed relationship was already hunting me, I had lost interest in living. Shortly after I returned back from my Orientation camp, everyone knew something was wrong with me, I only told them that it was the stress from Camp. Well, I was battered emotionally, that on 31st December 2014, I hit the rock button and decided to end my life and end the pains, I took insecticides and collection of anti depressants in over dose and battery acid, I cheated on death as I was in Coma for 4 days, I was referred to a psychologist for rehabilitation after I was discharged on the 12th of January 2015. I spent 6 months in rehabilitation Center here in Lagos State, where I was also serving then.

After the whole incident, I made up my mind to forgive her and give her a second chance since she was really sorry. The whole scenario started replaying itself, that she started acting strange again, already my friend had told me that she was seeing someone else. My family knew I was slipping into depression again and had wanted to fly me out of the country, but I was denied Visa when I least expected it. I had to leave Enugu for Lagos so as to keep away from her and the environment. but she still calls me on phone, saying that she still loves me, I truly love her so much. Am totally lost of words, lost of ideas. Am terrified to say the least. Am losing my sanity again. Please friends, depression is getting better of me at the moment.. I need a sincere advise
Re: GOING THROUGH A DEVASTATING BREAK UP. Please Help Me Friends!! Am Dying Silently by chinouka: 7:25am On Jun 25, 2016
My man take it easy and don't put all your eggs in one basket.
Re: GOING THROUGH A DEVASTATING BREAK UP. Please Help Me Friends!! Am Dying Silently by Nobody: 7:35am On Jun 25, 2016
Heineken:
may God bless you bro.. You're very sharp. There's no love.. And one thing I know and love telling my friends is that when it comes to women, they must have back ups. When one fumble, pick another sharply. She won't even try fyvkin up knowing fully well that she's not the only one. This thing nearly happen to me bro during my nysc days but I sharply forget that birch of a girl and another girl enter sharply. There's no time to love anyhow. I like your comment bro
You did the right thing bro. When a woman has the idea that she is replaceable anytime, they tend to behave well. Always have options no matter the situation and if you see are misbehaving or cheating don't accept any useless apology, always be willing to walk away in any relationship and dump her. The individual who is willing to walk away in any relationship controls the relationship.
I repeat LOVE DOES NOT EXIST. A woman does not love you as a person she only loves what you can provide for her or how you make her feel. Thanks for prayers bro. Cheers

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Re: GOING THROUGH A DEVASTATING BREAK UP. Please Help Me Friends!! Am Dying Silently by ptolomes: 7:40am On Jun 25, 2016
Bros, I can't blame you for falling for this woman, but the mistake started when you lost your mum ; you didn't need any emotional attachments all you needed was a friend, But you let yourself go, she on the other hand might just be along for the ride, and be that shoulder to cry on and afterwards she gets compensated for her time, from what you say she seem to be an attractive young woman who feels that she can do better than you, I mean like she feels if she can have you , she could always get someone better than you ,that's why she keeps drifting away, so far she hasn't met anyone in her life that can match your loyalty to her , so she will keep coming back to say she really loves you, when all she is doing is exploring the waters, and you keep falling back to the time she held you up when you needed so much emotional support , and keep thinking that she face you so much and deserves better from you, and that's why you keep going back, and the loss of your mother is what you need to deal with more , because you keep wanting to your own life because loosing this girl , is like loosing your mother , and you don't want to let go, so bro I think you need to give yourself time to grieve and heal, before a relationship , you used this girl to cover your grieving process to num the pain of loss, and when sh is not there you loose control, you need to let exercise more, talk more, if you have to talk to someone do it with someone who understands your grieving process and deal with yourself first, stop taking advantage of his girls emotions because she too needs some room to breath if she loves you she has to see it and know it, you don't have to teach her how to love you , cause that's what youvare doing
Re: GOING THROUGH A DEVASTATING BREAK UP. Please Help Me Friends!! Am Dying Silently by Nobody: 7:40am On Jun 25, 2016
carmag:


your advice is number one

he attached his life to women, i don't believe he has male friends order wise they would've put sense into him,

people like him who avoid male friends are always a victim to such ladies

so don't pity him experience have always remained the best ............
Nice one. Never attach your happiness to any woman except your mother. Always have a life, goal, mission outsides/besides women.Men should be busy and learn to have fun without women.
Re: GOING THROUGH A DEVASTATING BREAK UP. Please Help Me Friends!! Am Dying Silently by Klington: 7:43am On Jun 25, 2016
delete everything that will bring her to ur mind, such as pictures etc
Re: GOING THROUGH A DEVASTATING BREAK UP. Please Help Me Friends!! Am Dying Silently by iampeTer(m): 7:45am On Jun 25, 2016
all these stories scares we the young ones ....girls been breaking boys heart since the days of Adam and eve
Re: GOING THROUGH A DEVASTATING BREAK UP. Please Help Me Friends!! Am Dying Silently by riczy(m): 7:45am On Jun 25, 2016
ur story is annoying, I don't knw wat to tell u!
Re: GOING THROUGH A DEVASTATING BREAK UP. Please Help Me Friends!! Am Dying Silently by olusholajohn(m): 7:45am On Jun 25, 2016
Thou art confused guy, she will still continue this shit even in marriage, don't force yourself to die anyhow, you know what to do, it's just that u don't have the courage to take your mind off a girl that is trying to play safe by weighing u up with another man, you will surely get a better girl walahi, she will never change, you giving her the third chance will be a great sin upon your head and you will never be forgiving in earth and in heaven for killing yourself over a LovePeddler......I hope u listen and take heed...dog wey go lost no dey listen to hunter whistle

1 Like

Re: GOING THROUGH A DEVASTATING BREAK UP. Please Help Me Friends!! Am Dying Silently by JuanDeDios: 7:49am On Jun 25, 2016
Nasri100:
You have a job to make your mum proud and you want to waste that duty over a v a g i n a?
He was stupid to give her a second chance, under those circumstances. He won't be stupid enough to give her a third, I hope, because this time his suicide attempt will be successful.
Re: GOING THROUGH A DEVASTATING BREAK UP. Please Help Me Friends!! Am Dying Silently by Dom2020: 7:51am On Jun 25, 2016
u should look for more powerful insecticides like snips or something and take, this will help u end ur life quicker. guy ur sick, if u want to waste the resources spend to educate u because of one silly girl all in the name of love then ur not worth living.
Re: GOING THROUGH A DEVASTATING BREAK UP. Please Help Me Friends!! Am Dying Silently by akinola83(m): 7:52am On Jun 25, 2016
My brother, am sorry for all u have gone through in d name of relationship but let me tell u i happen to be a real guy until I met dis beautiful chick. Could u believe the lady was dating a guy in my street n told d guy she was living with her uncle until I use my instinct to catch them. She started crying n since then I don't love her n I change my plan too. Though at first it wasn't easy but as a guy brace urself up, leave d past in the past and move forward. Karma is waiting for her n nature will reward u. Let her be.
Re: GOING THROUGH A DEVASTATING BREAK UP. Please Help Me Friends!! Am Dying Silently by franzis(m): 7:55am On Jun 25, 2016
Whats is love ? The only true love I know is GOD's Love and Mother's love ... every other love Na jara

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