SpicyJosBabe:



Thank u so much guyz. I love your points. Morality to a large extent does not depend on religion from what i have observed.
There are christians with extremely terrible characters and non christians with a kinder heart or a greater morality. May God help us all to be better people.

Why do I get the feeling that your mind is made up already?

Acidosis:


Try and tell people things that aren't real, let's see the number of followers/money you can gather in 20 years.

This is a rather lame comeback.

Throw the gold away....go marry brother Paul the prayer warrior, who'd end up cheating with sister Mary the choir mistress....iranu....

Ranchhoddas:
This is a rather lame comeback.

Perhaps the reader is just too lame to understand that over a million congregation wouldn't flock around a man without a cogent reason.

simplex2:


I'm agnostic, we are close relatives to atheists so I can tell you authoritatively that being in love with an atheist is the best thing that will happen to you. My fiance is a Christian and we don't have any qualms. She drags me to church once in a while but she knows the only God I worship is her and my tithe belongs to her; all special seeds, first fruits, special covenant offering belongs to her. And mehn do I love her? She's my own goddess and I adore her like no other.

So my dear, don't let this opportunity slip you by.

Wow, datz lovely.
But pls what is the real difference between an atheist and an agnostic? I practically see them as the same thing.

Acidosis:


Perhaps the reader is just too lame to understand that over a million congregation wouldn't flock around a man without a cogent reason.

Classic case of ''one million people cannot be wrong'' (argumentum ad populum) fallacy. Do you know how many people follow the Dalai Lama? Or is it because he hasn't commercialized his followership... I am Christian by the way.

Ranchhoddas:
Why do I get the feeling that your mind is made up already?

That comment doesn't my mind is made up already. Even if i won't continue with the relationship, it doesn't mean i will not acknowledge the truth, and the truth is that we have good and bad people in all divides.

SpicyJosBabe:


Wow, datz lovely.
But pls what is the real difference between an atheist and an agnostic? I practically see them as the same thing.

an atheist doesn't beleive in god because he knows god doesnt exist while an agnostic might beleive in god but is not sure if god exists or not

RaptObserver:
you should ask him how he intends to perform the marriage rites. But truth be told, Atheists are not monsters the way some ppl paint it. It is better you ask him to tell you why he chose the path so you can understand him better. You have said, he has all you need except religion, in life we can't have it all. We have seen pastors who beat their wives, some cheat on their wives and some abandon(divorce) them. So being religious is not a guarantee.

nubian999:
You should talk to him about this. Find out what he wants and then see if you are looking for the same things. He could tell your mum he's not religious and she might lecture him a little.
If you can accept him and respect the fact that he is a grown man who is capable of understanding the world for himself. Then I don't see the problem. But if like most people you're worried about what others will say or think about your husband not being at church or whatever he's expected to do then don't stress yourself and leave him.
You need to talk to him find out how life with him would be like. If you can have an understanding where you're loyal to each other and you are both welling to compromise a little then there is hope. I think it's too soon for you to be stressing about his religious views when you don't know each other well enough to know that you are compatible on other levels. Just enjoy him and plan together how you will overcome your religious differences.

Thank you dearies. I guess before i take any decision i have to really have a heart to heart talk with him on so many issues and i guess i will take my final decision and conclusion based on his responses.
I will go back to him and see if we can make arrangements and plans of the present and future compromises and sacrifices we are bound to make if we are ever going to be together. If he will be willing to compromise many things i will accept him, if he won't i will have no option but to leave him because it is very obvious that a die hard atheist and a comitted religious person can never really be together.

Our society is a dominantly religious and christian society and so atheists really have to make a lot of compromises to be with we christians.

My only fear and uncertainty in all these is the unstable nature of men. Men are known to change very much after marriage and i really don't know why.
The man who will be pampering you today and making so much promises on how he will sacrifice a lot for you will instantly change tomorrow after you have started answering his name and will now start dictating and setting down rules for you when you move into his house.

Pls all the Atheists here encouraging me to go ahead with this relationship, what if i become his wife tomorrow and he now changes his softer and relaxed religious attitude and now becomes a core or die hard atheist and starts dictating religious boundaries for me since am now under his authority, what would i do then? Cos you guys can agree with me very well that you men do change after marriage.

stephenmorris:
an atheist doesn't beleive in god because he knows god doesnt exist while an agnostic might beleive in god but is not sure if god exists or not

killsmith:
Throw the gold away....go marry brother Paul the prayer warrior, who'd end up cheating with sister Mary the choir mistress....iranu....

simplex2:
You finally had the chance to fall in love with an atheist and you are complaining.
Atheists don't worship god, so he will direct all his worship on you; you will be loved, cherished, adored, revered, cared for, pampered and literally worshiped!

exceltech, Seun

stephenmorris:
an atheist doesn't beleive in god because he knows god doesnt exist while an agnostic might beleive in god but is not sure if god exists or not

This is soo wrong!

SpicyJosBabe:


Wow, datz lovely.
But pls what is the real difference between an atheist and an agnostic? I practically see them as the same thing.

We agnostics don't believe there's enough prove for the existence and/or non-existence of gods or any other supreme being, so we don't take the concept of god or religion serious. While an atheist may ask you questions like "where is this god you talk about? Any evidence of him?", we agnostics will rather ask; "How sure are you that your own version of god is the real one and not the other gods you call fake gods".

We are mostly humanist that believe more on humanity guided by morality and not christian nor islam virtues. Most times, we graduate from humanist-agnostic to atheistic-agnostic and finally to become full-fledged atheists.

SpicyJosBabe:
My only fear and uncertainty in all these is the unstable nature of men. Men are known to change very much after marriage and i really don't know why.
The man who will be pampering you today and making so much promises on how he will sacrifice a lot for you will instantly change tomorrow after you have started answering his name and will now start dictating and setting down rules for you when you move into his house.

Pls all the Atheists here encouraging me to go ahead with this relationship, what if i become his wife tomorrow and he now changes his softer and relaxed religious attitude and now becomes a core or die hard atheist and starts dictating religious boundaries for me since am now under his authority, what would i do then? Cos you guys can agree with me very well that you men do change after marriage.

exceltech, Seun

My dear, the answers you seek for is not on nairaland because no man comes with instructional manual. We will only comment based on our own opinion, you are the one that wears the shoes and will wear the shoe for the rest of your life. Discuss with him and express your fears. Me personally, I won't tolerate a fanatic-christian as a wife; someone who will spend more hours on prayers than on sex, do fasting and starve me on the process, spend more nights for vigils than a career nurse does at work, invite strangers to come and do special prayers and deliverance in my house everyother week, impose strict religious rules on my children... Trust me, your fiance may have some of these fears too so its not just you that have fears.

Your bible says 'two cannot work together unless they agree...' so talk with him and see if the fears will be alleviated.

SpicyJosBabe:
My only fear and uncertainty in all these is the unstable nature of men. Men are known to change very much after marriage and i really don't know why.
The man who will be pampering you today and making so much promises on how he will sacrifice a lot for you will instantly change tomorrow after you have started answering his name and will now start dictating and setting down rules for you when you move into his house.

Pls all the Atheists here encouraging me to go ahead with this relationship, what if i become his wife tomorrow and he now changes his softer and relaxed religious attitude and now becomes a core or die hard atheist and starts dictating religious boundaries for me since am now under his authority, what would i do then? Cos you guys can agree with me very well that you men do change after marriage.

exceltech, Seun

i will get bck to you in the afternoon kinda busy now
cc:johnydon22

SpicyJosBabe:



Thank you dearies. I guess before i take any decision i have to really have a heart to heart talk with him on so many issues and i guess i will take my final decision and conclusion based on his responses.
I will go back to him and see if we can make arrangements and plans of the present and future compromises and sacrifices we are bound to make if we are ever going to be together. If he will be willing to compromise many things i will accept him, if he won't i will have no option but to leave him because it is very obvious that a die hard atheist and a comitted religious person can never really be together.

Our society is a dominantly religious and christian society and so atheists really have to make a lot of compromises to be with we christians.

Such arrogance!!! Simply because you have a pus.sy and you are a christian which make you falsely believe you are superior to others.I've got two words for you...FU.CKK YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!

firstking01:
Let him go look for an atheist and marry...everytime an atheist wants to marry a christian sister, abi dem no get atheist sister for that their gathering ni??....nobody is neutral in life, it's either you are serving mamon or serving God....also, self righteousness can never take you to heaven cos i see people type here that some atheist have good character than a christian, this is fallacy in the higher oder of enthropy system...let him goan marry from his believe, it's as simple as that.

There is a very very very small pool of atheist women available to atheist men in nigeria and a man has got to "burst a nut".So what other choice does he have but to manage the women available to him?Aint no male atheist in nigeria actively seeking to get hitched with all these christian and moslem nutcases everywhere.We are just compromizing.Daz all

traware:
Such arrogance!!! Simply because you have a pus.sy and you are a christian which make you falsely believe you are superior to others.I've got two words for you...FU.CKK YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!

HAHAHAHAHA!!! Dude, this one pain you.

Anyway, before I officially unfollows thread, OP can go through what her fellow christians are saying about marrying an atheist here ==>

https://www.nairaland.com/3392007/why-no-christain-lady-should

Most of them STRONGLY disagrees with the notion. So you might pick up a few things there.

simplex2:


My dear, the answers you seek for is not on nairaland because no man comes with instructional manual. We will only comment based on our own opinion, you are the one that wears the shoes and will wear the shoe for the rest of your life. Discuss with him and express your fears. Me personally, I won't tolerate a fanatic-christian as a wife; someone who will spend more hours on prayers than on sex, do fasting and starve me on the process, spend more nights for vigils than a career nurse does at work, invite strangers to come and do special prayers and deliverance in my house everyother week, impose strict religious rules on my children... Trust me, your fiance may have some of these fears too so its not just you that have fears.

Your bible says 'two cannot work together unless they agree...' so talk with him and see if the fears will be alleviated.

LoL, you have really said it all. Thanks

traware:
Such arrogance!!! Simply because you have a pus.sy and you are a christian which make you falsely believe you are superior to others.I've got two words for you...FU.CKK YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Yes, well not my fault for the making. Atheism is very odd in Nigeria because the overwhelming majority of Nigerians are religious. So u guys have to put up with us.
And tell me, why do u guys woo religious ladies in the first place? And u guys will not tell the lady at first until when the lady now finds out deep down later.

traware:
There is a very very very small pool of atheist women available to atheist men in nigeria and a man has got to "burst a nut".So what other choice does he have but to manage the women available to him?Aint no male atheist in nigeria actively seeking to get hitched with all these christian and moslem nutcases everywhere.We are just compromizing.Daz all

Yes and thank God u know. There is really something wrong with atheism and that's why women (who are smarter and more sensitive naturally) see no reason in practicing such lifestyles with no reasonable benefit.
You guys should stop chasing religious women!

SpicyJosBabe:


Yes, well not my fault for the making. Atheism is very odd in Nigeria because the overwhelming majority of Nigerians are religious So u guys have to put up with us.
And tell me, why do u guys woo religious ladies in the first place? And u guys will not tell the lady at first until when the lady now finds out deep down later



Yes and thank God u know. There is really something wrong with atheism and that's why women (who are smarter and more sensitive naturally) see no reason in practicing such lifestyles with no reasonable benefit.
You guys should stop chasing religious women!

@first bolded;You are very wrong.The majority of Nigerians are not religious.The majority of Nigerians practice what can best be referred to as "religiousity".Daz all @second bolded;I have already explained this in one of my previous posts.As an atheist male based in Nigeria,there are very few atheist women in the state.What else can i do but to have relationships with the women around me who are into one religion or the other?If i could,i would have nothing to do with any woman involved with any religion but what other choice do i have in Nigeria?Mastur.bate or turn gay?As for the other question,why should any atheist tell anyone he is an atheist in the first place?Isnt the practice or non-practice of any religion by an individual a personal/private issue?Do you erroneously believe everyone in Nigeria is as ignorant as the majority who literarily carry their bogus religions on their sleeves?...Child please @third bolded;With this conclusion of your post,i now know this your whole story is a lie(why i'm i not surprised).You simply created this bullshitt tale inorder to indirectly attack atheists and their beliefs.I aint gat time for religious nutcases like yourself.Your deluded and smug self-righteousness,lies and arrogance disgusts me.So kindly bugger off

SpicyJosBabe:
My only fear and uncertainty in all these is the unstable nature of men. Men are known to change very much after marriage and i really don't know why.
The man who will be pampering you today and making so much promises on how he will sacrifice a lot for you will instantly change tomorrow after you have started answering his name and will now start dictating and setting down rules for you when you move into his house.

Pls all the Atheists here encouraging me to go ahead with this relationship, what if i become his wife tomorrow and he now changes his softer and relaxed religious attitude and now becomes a core or die hard atheist and starts dictating religious boundaries for me since am now under his authority, what would i do then? Cos you guys can agree with me very well that you men do change after marriage.

exceltech, Seun

There are some things you must take into consideration in a
relationship even for theist partners;

1. Does he keep to his words ?
; this is very important.

2a. What are the most important qualities you want in a marriage ?
2b. Does he possess such qualities ?

3. What are the most important qualities he wants in a marriage ?
3b. Do you have such qualities ?

4. Are you willing to let him be, not try to change his belief
and is he willing to let you be ?; this will depend on your
answer to question 1.

5. You need to have discussions about your future children.


You can determine the answers to these questions from behaviours
and also by having an heart to heart talk with him.
Please, have as much discussions as possible.

If he meets your expectations , then go ahead with it,
though people are different but I have realised that those who believe
that everything ends in this world are more likely to cherish life
and their loved ones.

SpicyJosBabe:


Yes, well not my fault for the making. Atheism is very odd in Nigeria because the overwhelming majority of Nigerians are religious. So u guys have to put up with us.
And tell me, why do u guys woo religious ladies in the first place? And u guys will not tell the lady at first until when the lady now finds out deep down later.



Yes and thank God u know. There is really something wrong with atheism and that's why women (who are smarter and more sensitive naturally) see no reason in practicing such lifestyles with no reasonable benefit.
You guys should stop chasing religious women!

@bolded
love's not about religion...
Its about the ''person''....if you yoke love and religion as one...you'd miss it totally...
If it were ''one''...we wont have inter-religious marriages...
My friends have said virtually all.
Just some few things i need to correct...if you reply..

Bloody m0r0n
So you are saying an atheist cannot have these traits? Ignoramus

sexymoma:

Think about it sis... you said he s sweet, caring and all that.. im not saying he s pretending ooo
buh hope you remember satan was an angel too... as a matter of fact, history made it known to us that he has the sweetest voice among angels.... Just think about it, Look into the future and imagine it, Him, You and your kids

It's only in naija and Africa where one needs protection...why do I need protection in a place where the government does its job and provides adequate security...
In obodoyibo try and do something funny to me spiritually and if I got evidence I'm gonna sue ur sorry a5s...

M2dX:
how on earth can a fully grow intelligence man won't believe in his Creator? this is unbelievable,, so when you want sleep or to go to bed no prayer,no thanks when you Wake up and when you want to work or travel,,? so the protect he is getting from birth till now is from who? , .please if you cant belief in God because of not seeing him with your kolokolo eyes why not belief from wonderful things he created in this planet earth and in universe? you can't see a beautiful house inside a Forest and concluded that no one build it because you cant find or see the builder. let's think with our head pls..

The way some people dey make atheists seem like demons, one would think the divorced PASTOR CHRIS, who happens to 'be the Xtian alpha male is also equally an Atheist

raphieMontella:

@bolded
love's not about religion...
Its about the ''person''....if you yoke love and religion as one...you'd miss it totally...
If it were ''one''...we wont have inter-religious marriages...
My friends have said virtually all.
Just some few things i need to correct...if you reply..

Only if your faith is of no serious importance to you.
How do you talk about God with someone who doesn't believe in the existence of God? Truth is, I can't have a deep conversation without hinting at my faith. Instead, I'll remain single.

Dear, I understand it is a dreaded decision because it is not easy for someone who never examined and evaluated the religion she inherited before. It is very difficult for an average Nigerian to ever search further to know and critize about the religion given to them by parents.

I will tell you your boyfriend is a real guy, he is a straight forward and sincere guy, the people who call themselves atheist are genuine, intelligent, smart and brilliant people who have search and research about religion and doctrines before their final decision.

God gave everyone freedom of choice and he does not operate like man, God does not give and decided to take back anointing and blessings from people.
Every predicament is from devil.

I will not advice you to go ahead bcus of yourself and your family; it will be tough to accept him totally due to your believe.

Try to engage him more to know what brought about his decision bcus he was once either a christian or muslim.

See the list of Nigeria atheist for your peruse

Thank you

sexymoma:
Think of your kids future darling
you are gonna confuse dem
which way to go...
you gonna tell dem about Christ, he s gonna tell dem he doesn't bliv in Christ
Forget love ooo... E dey fade in marriage
and besides you guys jos started, everything will still be new.
u better decide before it's too late.

I'll Advise you..Marriage where God nor dey involve na yagayaga e dey be oo
don't get me wrong, i mean your Marriage will jos be there.
There will be sometimes when you can't face the battle alone abi you think say marriage dey sweet forever ni
There'll be need for both of you to call on God, How are you gonna cope.
Pls tell me.
Think about it sis... you said he s sweet, caring and all that.. im not saying he s pretending ooo
buh hope you remember satan was an angel too... as a matter of fact, history made it known to us that he has the sweetest voice among angels.... Just think about it, Look into the future and imagine it, Him, You and your kids

this one hard oh but my advice is if you are a religious person go for your like to avoid creating another topic

He has told you, you are asking us

I understand how it feels getting to a new arena of love. Atheist that I know have the following qualities.
1. They are humanistic
2. Cheerful
3. Realistic
4. Quite open minded
5. Friendly.
However,

If you believe in your Christianity and your salvation then you have the following odds
1. 2 Corinthians 6: 14 "don't be equally yoked with unbeliever"
2. Psalms 11:3 If the foundations be destroyed, what can the righteous do?
3. Galatians 5:25 If we live in the Spirit, let us also walk in the Spirit.
4. Have you consulted your creator (God) who is the founder of marriage institution. Pray about it anything God tells you about him then work with that. Conclude your issues in the spiritual first before approaching him. Anything you get from the spiritual then work with it.
But personally I don't support a believer marrying unbeliever

If u like marry apostle suliemon he will still cheat...u better marry the man that love u and leave religion for oyinbo wey bring am.

SpicyJosBabe:
It started many weeks back i met this guy at an event, we exchanged numbers and since then we have been very close. We have gone out on dates together and i must confess that my love for this guy has grown so much that hardly a day goes by that i don't think of him and the same thing on his own path towards me.

I got the shock of my life 3 days ago when i was with this guy and somehow our conversation veered towards religious issues seriously for the first time and he told me plainly that he does not believe in God, i taught he was joking at first until i confronted him and he told me that he is an Atheist and nothing i can do to make him change his belief, that i either accept him for who he is or nothing else.
He said he can accept me for my religion and if our relationship leads to marriage, i can maintain my belief and he maintains his own.

I was born a christian and from a strict religious home and i still maintain christian values on my own even though i may not be so much religiously strict.
I blame myself though for not noticing this about him earlier, because initially i slighlty noticed that whenever i make religious exclamations, he acts uneasy and always changes the topic whenever i tilt towards religious discussions. We are in the same profession so most times our discussions are in that direction.

I left his place since that day and we have not spoken since then, but this guy's thoughts cannot leave my heart. He is the most wonderful guy i have met in my life, he has all the qualities i want in a man (except for religion), and my heart cannot just let go.
Pls, what should i do? I have never been so confused b4.

my dear leave religion o....dont regret later....na church boys bad pass....