1.) Fine girl fine girl next 25 years they will be calling u fine mama
nothing last forever shey u grab?

2.) Some girls barb their hair to look like Chidinma but they end up looking like Emmanuella.

3.) 60% of girls with big eyes are so cute! The other 40% look like surprised frogs.

4.) Girls, Apart from let me help u put it before u hurt me. which other motivational quotes do u know?

5.) Do we still have ladies that says. Baby if you don't tell me how you got this money, I will not take it from you?

6.) IPhone X IPhone X IPhone X What if I buy this IPhone X and Angel Gabriel blows the trumpet?
Is it not vanity?

7.) If a lady without a profile pic sends you a friend request on Facebook.
My brother, reject HIM, I repeat, reject HIM.

8.) Don't feel bad if you have a small dick
everything happens for a reason, maybe it won't reach deep into where STD and HIV are kept
Kai (Ade perrie) WISDOM will not kill me.

9.) Early this morning, I saw one gay vomiting some white sustains.. Boom he is pregnant.

10.) Stop taking pictures beside people's car, your village people will kill you for nothing.
11.) you will buy coil to kill mosquitoes and dey will smoke it like shisha
Den come to ur ear and be singing watin u gain.

12.) Having sex with an uneducated village girl using a Condom is OK until you hear her sharing the experience with her friend like this ...."His penis is brand new, the waterproof is still on it!!

#Xavier.

1. You went to
pharmacy to buy poison
for
yourself and you are
still waiting to collect
change. are you serous
at all.

2. If I say 'Text me
when u get there' and u
decide to call. U will keep
calling, until u
understand English.

3. What is nigeria
turning into, A friend
just
told me that their
father takes offering
from
them during morning
devotion.

4. Last night I had a
dream and I was
kissing my neighbour's
daughter but this
morning she saw me
and pretended like
nothing happened
Girls can pretend ooh.

5. If your parents never
told you to go and
wear your shoes and
before you come back
they were gone, forget
it, you were
adopted.

6. That Moment U
Decide To Start Saving
Money At All Cost, Nxt
Minute U See Urself
Buying Suya And Sayin
"Person No Go Enjoy
Again..".

7. Uncle, because your
crush now lives in
your area, you will now
be wearing suit to
fetch water, and you dey find
accolade
Bros Behave.

8. U wear high waist
trousers during
pregnancy now you're
asking why your
baby's head looks like
frying pan.

9. MACCA: Where are
you going to?
Girl: To commit suicide..
MACCA: Then why all
these make up?
Girl: Idiot, don't you
know I will be in
tomorrow's newspaper
and Gossip?
Fada_lawd

10.This girl kept
swearing "if am the one
that stole the money
let my sister die;
After much
investigation I found
out she is the only child.

#Xavier.

Yoruba actors in a yoruba movie be like "Olaniyi the man you killed is dead".

#Xavier.

There are two types of SARS: SARS on the beat, and SARS wey dey beat.

#Xavier.

Hello, Fellow Nairalanders, followers and Viewers of this thread "CHRONICLES OF JOKES", This is to inform you all that you are free to post any Jokes, Funny Memes (pictures), Funny Videos and Funny Audios here to keep the thread moving.
And don't forget to leave a comment, hit the like and share button when you visit or view the thread.
THANKS.

#Xavier.

.

When Your Plate Number Is The Source Of Problem.

Savage

.

.

.

Hello, Fellow Nairalanders, followers and Viewers of this thread "CHRONICLES OF JOKES", This is to inform you all that you are free to post any Jokes, Funny Memes (pictures), Funny Videos and Funny Audios here to keep the thread moving.
And don't forget to leave a comment, hit the like and share button when you visit or view the thread.
THANKS.

#Xavier.

Oh my God I can't stop laughing� � Watch this hilarious Rib- cracking video � ust imagine what these guys did because of money(just 10,000 Naira) � �

����Watch now����


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=e_GJow1RIew

.

Maths be like.
A plane is travelling at 235km/hr south-west and d wind z blowing at 5km/hr south east,calculate d age of the pilot..
Maths why.

#Xavier.

.

Nawa o, English is hard in 9ja o
Which one is
"Are u going to come?"

#Xavier.

.

That awkward moment when the 5
Star hotel attendant tells you a bottle of
coke is #1500. You'll start explaining
and describing coke like
"I mean coke... Not the alcoholic one oo. The mineral type.. I mean the normal coke that looks like Pepsi.... The one Coca-Cola produces"

#Xavier.

Hello, Fellow Nairalanders, followers and Viewers of this thread "CHRONICLES OF JOKES", This is to inform you all that you are free to post any Jokes, Funny Memes (pictures), Funny Videos and Funny Audios here to keep the thread moving.
And don't forget to leave a comment, hit the like and share button when you visit or view the thread.
THANKS.

#Xavier.

Buy one and get one free. Vtpass is giving away one extra ticket when you buy one with this gift voucher for the "Henrotion in Expression" concert Featuring:see Henrotion, Seyi law, Dan D Humorous,Okey Bakassi,Ajebo,Princewill,MC Shakara,Senetor,Joe EL,xBusta and many more #VTpassjara link in bio

.

True Or False

Instead of all these Aboki Okada riders to tell you they don't know the place you are going to, they will just call price for you. So I decided to teach one of them a lesson.

ME: Bike, Bike, you dey go?
ABOKI: Oga where I dey go?
ME: Australia, How much?
ABOKI: Kai! Oga how much I gwo pay?
ME: You tell me how much u go collect..
Aboki: ₦300 oga!
ME: Ha? Australia no far na, no be ₦100?
Aboki: I know the place oga, pay ₦200 gaskia!
ME: (try to leave him)
Aboki: Oya make we go...***Starts Bike***

For 2 hours now on bike, we are still on our way to Australia.....Aboki don drive round town and I'm enjoying the ride.

ABOKI: Oga, I neva reach?
ME: No ooo! E remain small; but you say you know the place?
ABOKI: Yes I know am Oga, I dey for front but your money I don pass ₦200.
ME: No wàhálà, I go Add ₦20 ... Just continue...

I go gist una how e end. But not now sha, we still dey road. Today, I must reach Australia with ₦220.

#Xavier.

1.Some girls will be like: if he cannot give u morning, afternoon and night food money, him no be man..
My sister go to a motherless babies home. Ur mate dey there.

2. The only advantage of being a Nigerian is that you can piss anywhere

3. I entered Okada early today and the Okada man was singing; "if I die make una no cry for me" Is like your brain is paining you!

4. Welcome to Africa whereby if you take a bath you will be asked where you are going.

5. Glo company is like SATAN. They will give you DATA and take away their NETWORK.

6. Don't date a girl with a screen cracked phone .....that will be your first relationship project work my brother.

7. Are u tired of this country? Do u
want to travel abroad? Just put
ur phone on flight mode, stand on it
and shout voom! Safe journey.

8. All the guys who hate and Insults ladies with sagging breast I believe your testicles are standing?

9. Men go shopping to buy what they want And Women go shopping to find out what they want! Wonderful creatures

10. Fastest finger
MTN 1500
269865106543185
Don't Tell Me It Didn't Enter Because I Tried It And It Entered.

11. How relationships will look like in 2022:
Boy: Babe are you coming or I should call Caroline?
Girl: Call Caroline, I’m at Kevin’s place.

12. A slayqueen posted on Facebook
"What can I do for you?" & her little sister commented " bring back my weavon biko".

13.The way girls cheat nowadays ehn! They can even give birth to twins and the two of them will have different fathers.

#Xavier.

Hello, Fellow Nairalanders, followers and Viewers of this thread "CHRONICLES OF JOKES", This is to inform you all that you are free to post any Jokes, Funny Memes (pictures), Funny Videos and Funny Audios here to keep the thread moving.
And don't forget to leave a comment, hit the like and share button when you visit or view the thread.
THANKS.

#Xavier.

.

A burglar breaks into a house. He sees a CD player that he wants so he takes it. Then he hears a voice “JESUS is watching you”. He looks around with his flashlight wandering “What The HELL Was That?”.
He spots some money on a table and takes it……Once again he hears a voice ” JESUS is watching you”. He hides in a corner trying to find where the voice came from. He spots a birdcage with a parrot in it!
He goes over and asks ” Was that your voice?”. It said “YES”. He then says “What’s your name?”. It says “MOSES”. The burglar says ” What kind of person names his bird Moses??” The parrot reply “THE SAME PERSON THAT NAMES HIS ROTWEILER “JESUS”.

#Xavier.

PARENTS PLEASE TAKE YOUR CHILDREN TO
SUNDAY SCHOOL…

A teacher came to the class and asked a
question
TEACHER: Who killed Goliath?
STUDENT 1: it’s not me
STUDENT 2: I wasn’t at school that day.
STUDENT 3: I don’t know.

The teacher went to the Headteacher’s office and told the HM that students in that class don’t know who killed Goliath.
The HM came to that class and asked…
HM: Who killed Goliath?
CLASS: we r not the ones..!!!
HM.: If u don’t tell me who killed Goliath, you’ll see fire today…!!
CLASS : We don’t know.

The HM turned to the teacher and asked; are you sure Goliath was killed by someone from this class??
The teacher fainted….!!

#Xavier.

Please be careful when buying rat poison, they are now selling the fake ones everywhere. Kindly make sure you taste it before you buy to ensure it’s the original one.

#Xavier.

MEDICAL ALERT:

Don’t Drink Water Immediately After Eating Fish ߊߐBecause Drinking Water May Cause The Fish To Start Swimming and Your Stomach Will Start Doing GulunGulun.

#Xavier.

Everything is now so expensive in Nigeria!!! Such that;Witches don’t even serve food in dreams anymore
.. I dey lie abi..Oya tell me when last U don chop for dream.

#Xavier.