delishpot:


Quite childish way of thinking. Reverse the case and put yourself in her shoes.
What you quoted was a response to another quote. But if you choose to be ignorant and pick what suits you carry go

Bro the truth is this matter is a broad one, and it was never written that the guy was shouting at the lady's dad but they were both arguing. I believe that the lady aligence now lie with her husband. Cause she's now the husband responsibility and no longer the dad. So I see it as childish and insensitive for a married lady to place her dad over the husband. And please do you mind making your point without insulting me (calling me a kid) ?

ChappyChase:

Bro the truth is this matter is a broad one, and it was never written that the guy was shouting at the lady's dad but they were both arguing. I believe that the lady aligence now lie with her husband. Cause she's now the husband responsibility and no longer the dad. So I see it as childish and insensitive for a married lady to place her dad over the husband. And please do you mind making your point without insulting me (calling me a kid) ?

So a lady must have some man responsible for her brain and function? She is not a human that should have her own dignity to ask, to contribute and to be? She has a husband and a dad. Her aligence lie with both. Non should command her like a commodity. She is the victim here. She should do what ever suits her in this instance. She doesn't have to listen to any of them.
I did not insult you. You it was who said the dad should marry his daughter. I replied, it is a childish way of thinking. I do not think I said anything insulting. If E vex you, then abeg, no vex again. I no plan to vex you today.

delishpot:


So a lady must have some man responsible for her brain and function? She is not a human that should have her own dignity to ask, to contribute and to be? She has a husband and a dad. Her aligence lie with both. Non should command her like a commodity. She is the victim here. She should do what ever suits her in this instance. She doesn't have to listen to any of them.
I did not insult you. You it was who said the dad should marry his daughter. I replied, it is a childish way of thinking. I do not think I said anything insulting. If E vex you, then abeg, no vex again. I no plan to vex you today.

You neither here nor there. In context of the question asked, what do you expect the lady to do? Sit down and get soaked in the heat of the quarrel (which she might likely say something she will regret) or kindly leave both of them(which will be going to the car)?

ChappyChase:

You neither here nor there. In context of the question asked, what do you expect the lady to do? Sit down and get soaked in the heat of the quarrel (which she might likely say something she will regret) or kindly leave both of them(which will be going to the car)?

Going to the car was the husbands command. Not her own reaction to what is on ground.
I said, she should do what ever suits her. She doesn't have to follow any of their commands and non should have the feeling like they own her. She is an adult, she can decide for herself without being see in as a bad wife or daughter in this situation.

pocohantas:
What would you do in this situation?
If I were the wife...

Well...thats a tough one.
Since I am married, I know the authority shifts automatically to the man, because I am a Christian.
So...
I will walk up to my dad, kiss him goodbye and walk to the car.
But...
My husband and I will settle such insolence when we get home.
...
Whatever happens a Responsible man should not make his wife be put a position where she has to picks sides with him and her family.
...

Sanchez01:

What on God's earth are you talking about? When a woman is married to a man, she drops her father's name and answers her husband's. The implication is that she belongs to a different family now and her access to her father's house can be greatly controlled or monitored by her husband.

The principles of marriage are clear on this. Should a woman do otherwise, she is termed immature and, or a rebel.

Again, should a father and his son-in-law get into an argument and both men decide to flex their authority on the vulnerable wife/daughter, she is to heed to her husband's call before any other. She's her father's daughter but she answers to a man before others now.

She could make a reconciliatory move afterwards but there and then, she just has to answer to her man. A contrary move or action could be termed as whatever and might cause her to lose her place in her home. Perhaps she could marry her father then.

Marriage vows and principles are like the terms and conditions of marriage. Your assertion seems to be the product of Telemundo. I honestly don't mean to slight you but it's the truth.

I'm sorry to say this but it is you that don't understand the basics of marriage!!!

You got married to a lady... you didn't purchase her from her parents dude

She's your wife doesn't mean she don't have a family where she grew up....

In our clime, a marriage between two people is actually a marriage between 2 families....

If the husband has any iota of respect, he won't let any misunderstanding get to the point of exchanging words with his father in-law...

This got nothing to do with Telemundo or Zeeworld or Africa Magic, this is about our African values....

I was trained not to exchange words with my elders, what about you?

LaylaAli:


You can't talk for me and mine, but you can talk for you and yours. Africa is a continent with many different cultures and countries and what works in your little corner of Africa isn't what happens all over. Our culture and traditional beliefs wouldn't accept my husband to shout at my father 1. Secondly, only a disrespectful low life would shout at his father in law and I wouldn't pick such a man. My father is ex army man so trust me he would send men that would not be begging! Basically, what I'm trying to say is speak for yourself! Not me.

YIMU
So u are feeling strong cos ur dad is an ex soldier?
What if u were unfortunate enough to marry another soldier much higher in rank to ur dad and also with double the ego ur dad has?
In that case, I guess ur lot and that of ur dad will be bruises, brutalization and a disgraceful divorce (specially for u).

obstead200:

YIMU
So u are feeling strong cos ur dad is an ex soldier?
What if u were unfortunate enough to marry another soldier much higher in rank to ur dad and also with double the ego ur dad has?
In that case, I guess ur lot and that of ur dad will be bruises, brutalization and a disgraceful divorce (specially for u).

Like I said speak for you and yours. My father comes first even if it leads to a divorce. I would never make my man choose between me or his mum so I shouldn't have to choose and if I must my loyalty will always be to my parents.

hedonistic:


Yeah Yeah. And it's your type that would sheepishly and slavishly blurt 'yes sir yes sir' when your boss/employer barks out orders at you, even sexual orders... And then you'll go back home to do yanga for your cuckold husband and form gender equality.

You "empowered" albeit misguided Nigerian females can be quite nauseating.

Unfortunately, I see neither male, female nor even hermaphrodite attached to your handle. Meaning you are a NOBODY and thus, definitely undeserving of a typical response.

PaperLace:
See as they are quoting me from all angles, I know how to get them talking. My husband can't shout at my father and get away with it, same way I can't shout at his mum. If for any reason he tries it, he would bear the consequences...that's all.

Can your FIL shout at you and get away with it? Just asking....

Fx55:
Can your FIL shout at you and get away with it? Just asking....

I would ignore him, which is what I expect my husband to do too.

PaperLace:
I would ignore him, which is what I expect my husband to do too.

Ignoring him isn't same as he getting away with it. Re-read my earlier question and provide a better answer. This time it should be well thought out and articulate.

Fx55:
Ignoring him isn't same as he getting away with it. Re-read my earlier question and provide a better answer. This time it should be well thought out and articulate.

K

Pocohantas

Did you ever had an old monicker?

Vorpal:
Pocohantas

Did you ever had an old monicker?

No...but I plan getting a new one.

pocohantas:

No...but I plan getting a new one.

Why?

I was wondering for you to have shared that post but perhaps as a result of the peeps you follow.

Vorpal:


Why?

I was wondering for you to have shared that post but perhaps as a result of the peeps you follow.

You're right, one of my 'following' shared it. I liked the story and decided to share, wonder why I am just seeing such a beautiful love story.

Why a new acct? I want to repent...

pocohantas:

You're right, one of my 'following' shared it. I liked the story and decided to share, wonder why I am just seeing such a beautiful love story.

Why a new acct? I want to repent...

Repent from what?

I look forward to your hilarious posts oh, do not let me fall into depression.

Some day i may repay you with a fat cheque

Xcelinteriors:
My loving and precious dad. Husband that will go out and sleep with other women, screw husband and he dare not argue with my dad sef shey he dey mad ni?

Sorry to ask but from this comment am forced to ask if you are married to a man or a boy ?

queenjuli:
I hope you'll go with sound reasoning when you walk in on your wife in a heated argument with your mother

first, the thing is that this scenario is highly unlikely as men respect themselves more. Wifey in a heated argument with mum is more likely.

secondly, in African culture, i respect my father-in-law even more than my own father. so for me and father-in-law to be having a shouting match, it means some serious shit has happened. Wifey is to stand by me at that hour. irrespective of whether wifey stands by me or not, or whether her dad is right or wrong, I would still have to go and prostrate to her father based on African culture things. However, Wifey standing by me determines where her loyalty lies.

[quote author=PaperLace post=52650917][/quote]any man that abuses u is a fool. Why would he even power play with your father. If he'd trained he'd simply drop a heated argument wit the old man. Afterall nobody can force him to do what he doesn't want to do.

engrobidigbo:
Women get confused when faced with such dilemma because they don't know the power they possess.

The following facts give her a strength when faced with such situation;
1) She's a wife to the man, thus got the keys to his heart
2) She's a daughter to the older man; and we know how men and their daughters get so bonded, sometimes they have stronger bonds with their daughters than their wife; hence, she's also got the key to his heart.

A woman is married into a family to further unite the home and not break it. If she takes any of th options you gave @op, she'll further tear up her relationship with the other person she didn't cling to.

If i were the woman, I'll yell at both my husband and dad and warn them to stop acting like kids. They'll be shell shocked at your reaction. Next, get them both to sit and talk some sense into them. If they refuse to listen and try to turn the table against you like your dad saying "did you just shout at me?"", then use the cry blackmail tool in your software (all women have this ). Cry that they don't love you that's why they want to destroy you by fighting and quarrelling.

if you're married I'm very sure u will never have a broken home. Good women don't keep homes, its politicians that keep homes. Unfortunately this can't be learnt. Its inborn.

Just kneel down, appeal to your father lovingly to forgive your hubby while winking at your hubby to take it easy......love wins and that could be the end if done well

[color=#770077][/color]Simple.....u obey both by sit nd stand, go into d car nd cum out den walk away

wetin I dey obey my papa for ? the one when I obey am b4 marriage never reach