crackhaus:

Lol, idealist...

What is idealistic about it? If I see a loved one stressed, I rush to help if I can. You don't?

BornagainThief:
i don't need your approved!

bye

But you wish you had it.

Mindfulness:


But you wish you had it.

Whatever makes you sleep well love .whatever makes you sleep well

Mindfulness:


Your bias won't let you reason like an intelligent person.

You definitely couldn't reason like one if you wanted Understanding your partner is key. I'm guessing her husband isn't much of a talker else he'd have shut her the first time she asked. But she had to rub it in like "what you staring at me like that for?" He did go too far by laying hands on her, but she doesn't have my pity. Judging by this, she'd have left him if he hadn't set her up in time for the rainy days.

Boyslick:

You definitely couldn't reason like one if you wanted Understanding your partner is key. I'm guessing her husband isn't much of a talker else he'd have shut her the first time she asked. But she had to rub it in like "what you staring at me like that for?" He did go too far by laying hands on her, but she doesn't have my pity. Judging by this, she'd have left him if he hadn't set her up in time for the rainy days.

I see. So hubby was too d*umb to understand his wife's struggle until she had to call him out severally.

mikezuruki:

I don't get you...so the wife telling him to wash the plate in public is his punishment for losing his business?

Hope you read the part where the woman said the man funded her business...with the same business he has done businesses with people! He lost it and of a sudden he's not responsible.

I don't see the point you're making

Many people have funded businesses that has come to ruin, hers is making progress from her efforts. Because someone funded your business doesn't mean they are entitled to your proceeds, not does it make the business automatically theirs. Dangote was funded with 500K from his family. That doesn't mean they own his businesses.
If he were responsible, he wouldn't need to be told to start washing the dishes while his wife serves food to customers. If he were so aware of his surrounding (probably lack of awareness contributed to him falling for scams) he should have noticed his wife was overwhelmed with customers, and noticed they were out of plates. He should know pleasing your customers is paramount and wouldn't want them to wait any second longer.
This is beyond husband and wife in their home, this is a business needed for the running of their home. For a parent to allow their ego and pride stand in the way of providing for their children shows they are very myopic and not responsible enough

I have seen former Managers of large establishments start running taxi services when they lost their jobs. Many graduates run uber, keke napep, and so many odd jobs here and there. This man in question was just asked to offer his help in the restaurant, and it suddenly becomes a big deal.
True life stoey- I know an elderly Indian medical consultant who is a force to be reckoned with in his field running a curry house/ restaurant and you see him serve customers, clean up the restaurant, load up dishes in the dishwasher. The restaurant was also funded by him, but run by his wife mainly and himself in his free time. It was never an issue to chip in his quota when they are short staffed, just to make sure their customers are pleased.

eyinjuege:


Many people have funded businesses that has come to ruin, hers is making progress from her efforts. Because someone funded your business doesn't mean they are entitled to your proceeds, not does it make the business automatically theirs. Dangote was funded with 500K from his family. That doesn't mean they own his businesses.
If he were responsible, he wouldn't need to be told to start washing the dishes while his wife serves food to customers. If he were so aware of his surrounding (probably lack of awareness contributed to him falling for scams) he should have noticed his wife was overwhelmed with customers, and noticed they were out of plates. He should know pleasing your customers is paramount and wouldn't want them to wait any second longer.
This is beyond husband and wife in their home, this is a business needed for the running of their home. For a parent to allow their ego and pride stand in the way of providing for their children shows they are very myopic and not responsible enough

I have seen former Managers of large establishments start running taxi services when they lost their jobs. Many graduates run uber, keke napep, and so many odd jobs here and there. This man in question was just asked to offer his help in the restaurant, and it suddenly becomes a big deal.
True life stoey- I know an elderly Indian medical consultant who is a force to be reckoned with in his field running a curry house/ restaurant and you see him serve customers, clean up the restaurant, load up dishes in the dishwasher. The restaurant was also funded by him, but run by his wife mainly and himself in his free time. It was never an issue to chip in his quota when they are short staffed, just to make sure their customers are pleased.

Okay. I agree with you. I fear another epistle Bro. LOL

mikezuruki:


Okay. I agree with you. I fear another epistle Bro. LOL

The funny thing is that this husband would gladly wash the plates and carry madam's bag if it was at work.

That said, we don't know the relationship between them prior to now.

We also do not know the pressure the husband has been going through. It seems like the husband has been visiting his wife at the canteen prior to now so her asking him to wash plates publicly where he was once an oga that the server girls would rally to serve might be the straw that broke the camel's back.

Whether we like it or not, most men are conditioned to see chores as demeaning and below their lofty stations. Done in public would be a castration of their ego.

If the husband had not been involved in chores prior to now, it would be herculean task to get him to do that while he is jobless and prone to interpret everything as been disrespected.

Unfortunately, the wife needs help she can't afford: I have not seen any eat in canteen run by one person.

The solution: the husband sees it as a family business which it is, swallow his pride and work together to make the place more efficient.

While I understand the husband's plight, it is an additional reason why I can't stand the average Nigerian husband.

DabuIIIT:
How the hell you ask your hubby to wash the plates!?
Huge mark of disrespect. A man is a man,he lost his mainstay,he still a man. Leave it to him to do the dishes on his own if he wants to but if he doesn't,don't tell him to. And you still asking who is to blame shows you still looking for trouble.

The guys gat a lot in his head and washing plates not one of them.






Finally,if she hurts your feelings,just walk away,don't ever raise your hands at her.

Your comment is idiotic at best.

What is bad in helping out your wife?

You men and your nonsense egos.

To assist in a business that feeds you and your children. Even if it doesn't feed you, so what?

Why would he slap her? Is she the reason he got scammed?
Even if he feels the dishes is something he can't do, can't he simply ask that they swap positions?

Look at how that one has let his life and the respect he thinks he deserves be based on how much he brings to the house.

It's even good he left the house.

The woman would be silly to go and beg him to come back. He should stay out as long as he likes.

Nonsense and maggi.

Mindfulness:


What is idealistic about it? If I see a loved one stressed, I rush to help if I can. You don't?

That you won't have to ask your husband to help you with the dishes implies that he always does it, and there has never, nor will there ever be a time when you will need to ask...because he always knows when to do the dishes.

If that's not 'idealism' hyped on steroids, I don't know what is.

Mindfulness:


What is idealistic about it? If I see a loved one stressed, I rush to help if I can. You don't?

*in that man's voice*

As long as it's not doing dishes, and other menial chores, sure I can help.

crackhaus:

That you won't have to ask your husband to help you with the dishes implies that he always does it, and there has never, nor will there ever be a time when you will need to ask...because he always knows when to do the dishes.

If that's not 'idealism' hyped on steroids, I don't know what is.

She asked you a question. Kindly answer. You're deflecting.

eyinjuege:


If the man hadn't been stupid enough to lose his business, to scammers, she would still have her staff intact, and his help wouldn't have been required in the restaurant.
He lost his business, she became fully responsible for the affairs of the home and subsequently her own business starts to suffer. If she loses all her customers because she cant afford to pay her staff, hasn't the man lost too?
A responsible man would ensure that bird in the hand (her business) doesn't suffer at all, because it's worth 2 birds (grandiose ideas which hasn't come into fruition like a new business/job) in the bush.

One has to be stupid to lose business to scammers.

You people will not kee me

crackhaus:

That you won't have to ask your husband to help you with the dishes implies that he always does it, and there has never, nor will there ever be a time when you will need to ask...because he always knows when to do the dishes.

If that's not 'idealism' hyped on steroids, I don't know what is.

Oh come on! Just stick to the story in this thread and stop making it so personal, it isn't, really.

MizMyColi:


*in that man's voice*

As long as it's not doing dishes, and other menial chores, sure I can help.

So nice to see you my lovely sis. How have you been?

MizMyColi:


She asked you a question. Kindly answer. You're deflecting.

Of course I'm deflecting.
The nerve, to ask me a question when she hasn't answered mine.

Tell her to answer this:
Would you "ask" your husband to do dishes right in front & to the hearing of strangers in a public place, or would you call him aside to a private corner before making the request?

Then we can continue

MizMyColi:


She asked you a question. Kindly answer. You're deflecting.

Don't know what drives him but it is not healthy.

MizMyColi:


Your comment is idiotic at best.

What is bad in helping out your wife?

You men and your nonsense egos.

To assist in a business that feeds you and your children. Even if it doesn't feed you, so what?

Why would he slap her? Is she the reason he got scammed?
Even if he feels the dishes is something he can't do, can't he simply ask that they swap positions?

Look at how that one has let his life and the respect he thinks he deserves be based on how much he brings to the house.

It's even good he left the house.

The woman would be silly to go and beg him to come back. He should stay out as long as he likes.

Nonsense and maggi.

Mindfulness:




So nice to see you my lovely sis. How have you been?

I've been well. We came back from our short vacation two days ago and I suddenly don't feel like working anymore.


And you lovely, how are you?
It's been so long

Mindfulness:


Oh come on! Just stick to the story in this thread and stop making it so personal, it isn't, really.

Hypothetical you mean...

Mindfulness:


Don't know what drives him but it is not healthy.

Are you two going to gossip me in my very before?

crackhaus:

One has to be stupid to lose business to scammers.

You people will not kee me

I doubt the sensibility of anyone who counts it as a slight to help in the running of his wife's business (which feeds him too btw) and even slapping her publicly on top of it.

MizMyColi:


I've been well. We came back from our short vacation two days ago and I suddenly don't feel like working anymore.


And you lovely, how are you?
It's been so long

It's always the same when one returns from a holiday. I know this feeling very well.

I am the happiest person on planet earth. Remember the sad story I confided in you some time ago? It's been resolved. I have never been happier. I am happier than happiest. I love everyone right now, everyone but Crack.haus.

crackhaus:

Are you two going to gossip me in my very before?

It's good for your ego. It's my good Sunday deed.

bukatyne:
The funny thing is that this husband would gladly wash the plates and carry madam's bag if it was at work.

That said, we don't know the relationship between them prior to now.

We also do not know the pressure the husband has been going through. It seems like the husband has been visiting his wife at the canteen prior to now so her asking him to wash plates publicly where he was once an oga that the server girls would rally to serve might be the straw that broke the camel's back.

Whether we like it or not, most men are conditioned to see chores as demeaning and below their lofty stations. Done in public would be a castration of their ego.

If the husband had not been involved in chores prior to now, it would be herculean task to get him to do that while he is jobless and prone to interpret everything as been disrespected.

Unfortunately, the wife needs help she can't afford: I have not seen any eat in canteen run by one person.

The solution: the husband sees it as a family business which it is, swallow his pride and work together to make the place more efficient.

While I understand the husband's plight, it is an additional reason why I can't stand the average Nigerian husband.

You just dey turn round and round trying to play the two sides and at the same time still be on the fence.

Your summary is you understand the man's plight, so what has not being able to stand the average Nigerian man got to do with it when you already seem to understand the plight of the average Nigerian man?

crackhaus:

Hypothetical you mean...

Camouflage tactics..

Mindfulness:


It's good for your ego. It's my good Sunday deed.

Good for my ego that two married women want to gossip me?

In what world?

crackhaus:

Good for my ego that two married women want to gossip me?

In what world?

In yours. Obviously.

crackhaus:

Of course I'm deflecting.
The nerve, to ask me a question when she hasn't answered mine.

Tell her to answer this:
Would you "ask" your husband to do dishes right in front & to the hearing of strangers in a public place, or would you call him aside to a private corner before making the request?

Then we can continue

Ohhh, I see what this is...

An ego boosting exercise(ish).

If you want me to answer...I mean, since of course you know we (Mindy and I) tend to reason alike, I would.

You know what, scratch that...

Here's my answer.

For fvck's sake...why should that be an issue?
That my husband came into the restaurant and saw how busy it is. Anyway, I trust him. He will want to do everything for me if he can while I just rest.

But since it's not my husband we're talking about here...

Again, I ask...what is the big deal in politely asking my husband to help with dishes?

And even if for some reason, I wasn't polite enough, apparently because I'm under enough stress as it is....

Why would he slap me?

If he can't swap positions with me or walk out if he's so stressed, it's prolly best that he left the house las las.

Can't deal with nonsense bikko.

MizMyColi:


Ohhh, I see what this is...

An ego boosting exercise(ish).

If you want me to answer...I mean, since of course you know we (Mindy and I) tend to reason alike, I would.

You know what, scratch that...

Here's my answer.

For fvck's sake...why should that be an issue?
That my husband came into the restaurant and saw how busy it is. Anyway, I trust him. He will want to do everything for me if he can while I just rest.

But since it's not my husband we're talking about here...

Again, I ask...what is the big deal in politely asking my husband to help with dishes?

And even if for some reason, I wasn't polite enough, apparently because I'm under enough stress as it is....

Why would he slap me?

If he can't swap positions with me or walk out if he's so stressed, it's prolly best that he left the house las las.

Can't deal with nonsense bikko.

I have always loved you so much and I love you even more now.

crackhaus:

Good for my ego that two married women want to gossip me?

In what world?

Gossip you kwa?

When you are here live and direct on the thread?

I thought gossiping about a person is usually in the person's absence?