.

My dear, forget about this guy o and move on with your life, he's obviously a player.
rejoice and be happy, because you are seeing this now and not when you are married to him with children because it would have been more complicated.
Some breakups are just blessings in disguise.
I pray for strength for you to get over this whole situation, a good guy comes your way soonest

OPTION A. If your story is 95% true, then you have a good reason to breakup with him, count your loses and move on. Again, If you are 100% sure he cheated, please breakup with him without saying goodbye, don't even point to him his wrongdoings, no matter how he pressured you to point out his wrongs just tell him you have left the matter for God to judge... (that way his concience will keep hunting him, if at all some concience is still left in him).

OPTION B. If you know you can cope with an unfaithful husband for the rest of your life, then pretend as if nothing happened.

Goodluck.

just take it slow i know how it feels just take a long walk, probably across your street..... if nobody sells sniper then i suggest you go to the neighbouring street...... good luck

Always fun to see women get treated the way they always treat men.

sorry sis

You wont know someone true character until the person is comfortable

Why not confront him with your findings then quit the relationship

If he truly loves you he will come back
Then if you think you wanna give him one more trial then its all yours ..if not move on totally

Your boo sound like mr.cassanova

You have no joy bro!

Holumhidey:



just take it slow
i know how it feels
just take a long walk, probably across your street.....
if nobody sells sniper then i suggest you go to the neighbouring street......
good luck

This isn't someone you should be planning your future with.

Holumhidey:



just take it slow
i know how it feels
just take a long walk, probably across your street.....
if nobody sells sniper then i suggest you go to the neighbouring street......
good luck

Don't be this way

dont waste time with him... over dating is bad

Holumhidey:



just take it slow
i know how it feels
just take a long walk, probably across your street.....
if nobody sells sniper then i suggest you go to the neighbouring street......
good luck

Sense is definitely far from you

Leave him. He doesnt respect women in general, and you in particular. All of you young women in this love trapezium are all articles of pleasure to him. I'm sure you're more than that.

A quick one:

1. Come to terms with what has happened
2. Whether or not you dated for 4 years or lost your virginity to him, be thankful you both weren't married yet
3. Extricate yourself from the situation. I mean, leave him alone to sow his wild oats.

Didn't even sound like it was an interesting relationship anyway.

Bottomline, he doesn't deserve you. Move on.

2dice01:
sorry sis

You wont know someone true character until the person is comfortable

Why not confront him with your findings then quit the relationship

If he truly loves you he will come back

Your boo sound like mr.cassanova

And if this lying, cheating, unconscientious, unintelligent and mediocre man comes back, what then should happen?

Jacinthe:


And if this lying, cheating, unconscientious, unintelligent and mediocre man comes back, what then should happen?

if they are meant together

Nothing will stop them ..not even all these side attraction

Remember this is only a side to the story

2dice01:
if they are meant together

Nothing will stop them ..not even all these side attraction

Remember this is only a side to the story

And who would have meant this lady to end up with that kind of man? God?

There may be two sides to the story, yes. But right now, we have only one to work with and we have to work with it if we're going to say anything. Not ideal, but that's life sometimes.

But yea, don't mind me. If op thinks she is meant to be with the guy because of love or maybe she feels they are soul mates, sure. It's up to her. We really have no stake to it. Before the end of the day, both of us advising here would likely have forgotten about this story to start with. So it's to advise and/or wish her to best really.

it's so easy to tell someone to dump their partner. but to whom carried the cross knows how it feels and what it means

Love is a choice. People who are in successful r|ships or marriages are in it b|c they're choosing to put in the efforts to make it work. When these efforts are consistently maintained and sustained and the r|ship or marriage is thriving, then we can that they are meant to be together. You cannot tell me that someone w| an abusive partner, a partner who chronically cheats, who doesn't love them, etc, is meant for them. The fact that these signs are showing themselves prior to marriage is enough warning to walk.

2dice01:
if they are meant together Nothing will stop them ..not even all these side attraction

Remember this is only a side to the story

fineboynl:
it's so easy to tell someone to dump there partner. but to whom carried the cross knows how it feels and what it means

That's to say all of us advising her to do so on this thread are inexperienced children who have never had to leave bad relationships.

theButterfly:
Love is a choice. People who are in successful r|ships or marriages are in it b|c they're choosing to put in the efforts to make it work. When these efforts are consistently maintained and sustained and the r|ship or marriage is thriving, then we can that they are meant to be together. You cannot tell me that someone w| an abusive partner, a partner who chronically cheats, who doesn't love them is meant for them. The fact that these signs are showing themselves prior to marriage is enough warning to walk.

i get your point what am saying is dude might change his ways and realize his mistake

Jacinthe:


And who would have meant this lady to end up with that kind of man? God?

There may be two sides to the story, yes. But right now, we have only one to work with and we have to work with it if we're going to say anything. Not ideal, but that's life sometimes.

But yea, don't mind me. If op thinks she is meant to be with the guy because of love or maybe she feels they are soul mates, sure. It's up to her. We really have no stake to it. Before the end of the day, both of us advising here would likely have forgotten about this story to start with. So it's to advise and/or wish her to best really.

What i meant is if he comes and realise his mistake she can forgive him

if she is still single she can give him a chance ..you know nobody above mistakes

But if she think enough is enough she can move on with her life weather single/dating or married

Yeah we can only try our bestb here..

Hope u are enjoying ur weekends tho

Am telling you, is not that easy at all, especially when is the same guy That disvirgned her.

fineboynl:
it's so easy to tell someone to dump there partner. but to whom carried the cross knows how it feels and what it means

The OP is particularly disappointed because the nincompoop deflowered her. OP, four years of one's time is much but won't you put them behind you rather than endure a lifetime of regret should you go ahead with him. Matters of the heart are somehow dicy, very sensitive, no one can absolutely say. Just move on if you are too broken.

For the records, cheats have something in common with leopards. My one cent.

He’s no longer interested in you. Just move on, though it will be painful.
From your write up, I guess you’re advanced in age and seem out of options.

2dice01:
What i meant is if he comes and realise his mistake she can forgive him

if she is still single she can give him a chance ..you know nobody above mistakes

But if she think enough is enough she can move on with her life weather single/dating or married

Yeah we can only try our bestb here..

Hope u are enjoying ur weekends tho

Okay, I get you.

Yes it is. Thanks a lot. Hope yours is too

Jacinthe:

Okay, I get you.
Yes it is. Thanks a lot. Hope yours is too

Yeah we thank God
Hope the salah meat is ready

Hmmm the dude bleeped up .He has no respect for you .

i know some element will be like you should japaa.. but trust me, thats not the solution to solve thing amicably..!
.
first thing is, do you still or really need that boy back?
.
if your answer is to be no, then you can make sure you tell him you see what he hide from you, the lies and cheat and trust me, watch him looking and begging for you back. because you catch his ego on suspense and he start knowing your worth.
.
but if your ans is yes, call him down, sit him down where you know he can feel your flow, presence, pains, emotion, the truth in your eye, and explain whatever everything in your mind plainly. how you love him, how you feel about him, how youre still being loyal to keep your body safe for him only and swear about that in his presence. pour out your pains to him, the sour, and request for his reply to think about it and that could give him a self thought to call his inner man home i.e if he's not a shame man.!
.
trust me, it only after this you can decide if to leave base on his behavior

It's time to talk about the future of this inspiring relationship.. 4years is enough to know the next step for both of you.

He has been compromised. know if he still have u in his future plans or not. it will help u to start now plan urself after this relationship.

else u want to wait another 4years without knowing ur fate with him.

He has been compromised.

First, I belong to the school of thought that believes that you don't go snooping on your partner's phone.

Secondly, I belong to the school of thought that believes that any partner that cheated on you while dating, will cheat on you when you are married. Every cheater I have ever known or come across, have cheated right during when he/she was dating. Leave that relationship before you contract STDs through him. Or before one of his Bleep mates attack you on the street or go diabolical on you. It does not matter how deeply you later he him and still want him. My people said that you don't use what you use to clean your ear on your eyes.

Talk to him and he will give you plenty reasons and don't be surprise when u start blaming yourself as the cause of his inability to control his phallus. He is a public toilet. Let me shock you, his philandering didn't start when he got the Federal Appointment. He has been dicking his phallus into every damn holes he he sight his eyes on. It's just that he has been successful in masking it.. Also don't be surprised that you are not even his main babe.

If you condone it now, you will continue to condone it. And viola, you will start giving excuses for his hoeing.

Thirdly, he forgot your birthday but remembers the birthday of a 'friend'.

Red flag....

For the last time, RUN for your LIFE...