Welcome, Guest: Register On Nairaland / LOGIN! / Trending / Recent / New
Stats: 3,153,238 members, 7,818,797 topics. Date: Monday, 06 May 2024 at 04:12 AM

My cousin who got married this year July is actually thinking of leaving the man - Family (6) - Nairaland

Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Family / My cousin who got married this year July is actually thinking of leaving the man (52155 Views)

As A Married Man, Do You Sometimes Dream Of Leaving Your Family & Disappearing? / My Cousin Who Got Married Last Year July Is Actually Thinking Of Leaving / My Boyfriend Is On The Verge Of Leaving Me. Help! (2) (3) (4)

(1) (2) (3) (4) (5) (6) (7) (8) (9) (10) (Reply) (Go Down)

Re: My cousin who got married this year July is actually thinking of leaving the man by Adinije(f): 9:18am On Sep 14, 2019
I wonder why only few people are applying their reasoning in this matter. Everybody is shouting 'she doesn't love him yen yen yen' 'true love no dey again yen yen yen'
This family married this lady for her kidney period! KIDNEY FAILURE DOESN'T HAPPEN OVERNIGHT.

3 Likes

Re: My cousin who got married this year July is actually thinking of leaving the man by emmansus(f): 9:19am On Sep 14, 2019
We are in a civilised world"has really buried integrity,dignity,confidence,trust,love and morals.marriage has now become for show,trade by barter,garbage in garbage out,jonkey and ulala.we have throw away commitment,devotion and strong respect for vows and the God behind the vows,not minding the fact that ones you say "I DO,a seconds after the I do.and something goes wrong,solution is your next approach but this days we see and hear rubbish on marriages.somtimes am thinking if this present generation will actually make heaven.GOD HELP US.

2 Likes

Re: My cousin who got married this year July is actually thinking of leaving the man by sylve11: 9:20am On Sep 14, 2019
gidob:

What are you even saying...after writing so much, you made no point


Lol grin cool
Re: My cousin who got married this year July is actually thinking of leaving the man by Martinez39(m): 9:20am On Sep 14, 2019
kongolo:

@Emboldened I think i just found my twin grin
You sef get sense. grin

2 Likes

Re: My cousin who got married this year July is actually thinking of leaving the man by openmine(m): 9:23am On Sep 14, 2019
hmmmm.....donating a kidney to a person should be based on volition or free will and not from manipulation or duress!
my opinion!
Re: My cousin who got married this year July is actually thinking of leaving the man by Leonardomike: 9:23am On Sep 14, 2019
LillyVal:
My cousin who got married this year July is actually thinking of leaving the marriage because the husband was diagnosed of Kidney failure and needs a transplant. The summary of the story is that the family of the man is expecting the newly married wife to donate one of her kidney to the man because my cousin is biological match to the husband, she and her family has said LAI LIA O, that his their child and they should find a way to go about it. After dragging this issues for some months na, my cousin family are pushing her to file for a divorce

a. would it be considered wickedness on her part considering, his not only the husband but PARTLY trained her in school too?

The marriage is less than a year no much money to even look for a seller, Aunty want to japa and leave the man

What do you think?
ladies with there useless sense ooh

2 Likes

Re: My cousin who got married this year July is actually thinking of leaving the man by oluomo2013: 9:24am On Sep 14, 2019
The man can find his way to brekete family on human right radio. People donate kidney for free. Lobatan! The family can remain.
Re: My cousin who got married this year July is actually thinking of leaving the man by nattyGENT: 9:28am On Sep 14, 2019
Hmm, like las las e come be say na game plan based on how she come behave after the marriage, to really know your cousin to involve her in their family secret or surprise her with untold wealth or properties of the husband. She go come cry foul how she trully loves the husband
Re: My cousin who got married this year July is actually thinking of leaving the man by MPESA(m): 9:34am On Sep 14, 2019
CyberEBOLA:
THEY MARRIED HER FOR HER KIDNEY IN THE FIRST PLACE
Exactly my thought except if the Lady knows before hand.
Re: My cousin who got married this year July is actually thinking of leaving the man by Midas01: 9:35am On Sep 14, 2019
Stop saying nonsense. There are actual facts that show that more men than women ditch their partners due to life threatening medical conditions.

My aunt just passed away due to a stroke about 4 days ago. Her husband who was a pastor left her when she fell ill.

If you doubt this I will pull up facts for you.
ChristianEast:

This is bullshii.

An average man would make that sacrifice for the wife. #FACT

I will do it for my wife without dragging families into it. I am afraid of surgeries, I don't trust Nigeria medical system, but I will make that sacrifice.

3 Likes

Re: My cousin who got married this year July is actually thinking of leaving the man by Midas01: 9:36am On Sep 14, 2019
Oh please shut up. The average man ditches his partner due to a life threatening medical condition and this is pure facts. Most women stick with their partners . Google it and cure your ignorance.
Martinez39:
Thank you jare! All these females are just talking nonsense.

2 Likes

Re: My cousin who got married this year July is actually thinking of leaving the man by Martinez39(m): 9:39am On Sep 14, 2019
Midas01:
[s]Oh please shut up. The average man ditches his partner due to a life threatening medical condition and this is pure facts. Most women stick with their partners . Google it and cure your ignorance.[/s]

1 Like

Re: My cousin who got married this year July is actually thinking of leaving the man by Midas01: 9:40am On Sep 14, 2019
Wether OJB's story is true or false I don't know. But there has been reports of people who started cheating and even divorced their partners after a kidney donation.

There is a man in US who started cheating on his wife who donated a kidney to him shortly after his recovery. The story came on the news when the woman requested to have her kidney back.
marvelous000:

can you prove that he married extra wife after his kidney debacle, or you're giving a dog a bad name to hang it. cos as far as my memory serve me; such a thing never happened, instead; it was said that his other wives deserted him when his kidney issue started, only the one who donated her kidney stuck around, and i remember people on nairaland hailing her for sticking with him when others left.
Re: My cousin who got married this year July is actually thinking of leaving the man by Midas01: 9:41am On Sep 14, 2019
Exactly.
pocohantas:


When he was shown on HIP-TV, they were all with him. But going by your narrative, a man had a woman who loved him enough to donate her kidney- but he married extra wives. No wonder this one no wan give.

Before he will use her kidney and be doing "men are polygamous in nature" grin
Re: My cousin who got married this year July is actually thinking of leaving the man by owila4luv(m): 9:42am On Sep 14, 2019
if the reverse is the case the man will be labelled heartless, now i call the lady heartless cos she is indeed! they are one body as long as marriage is concern, she don't even need the advice of the family to make her decision. let her leave as planned but God is watching an he Never Fails

1 Like 1 Share

Re: My cousin who got married this year July is actually thinking of leaving the man by phillippians(m): 9:45am On Sep 14, 2019
yazga:
Did the kidney suddenly fail or it was there all along and wasn't disclosed? If it wasn't disclosed, she has a choice to walk away. If it happened suddenly, she ought to make sacrifice but you can't force her. I believe he has siblings, let love ànd blood lead.

Again, Instead of the two families to sit down and look for a suitable solution, it's divorce they are pushing her for? A fresh marriage for that matter, what exactly was their reason to get married if they can't support and help each other at their down times?
Oh so it's now you remember he has siblings, when some ladies will never allow their husband to assist their biological siblings in any way, now he's sick its falls on the siblings as their duty to revive their brother. See why I don't joke with my family? Mother, father and siblings first over anything else. Am married too

2 Likes

Re: My cousin who got married this year July is actually thinking of leaving the man by tayoccu(m): 9:48am On Sep 14, 2019
d33types:
See the way people are using threats of marriage vows on the poor iyawo.

There are very few instances where kidney injury can lead to end stage renal disease (the stage where transplant is needed) all within 3months and affecting both kidneys.

Kidney failure has stages 1 to 5 and only poor management would make it progress to the last stage within 3months.It is even almost 99% likely that the man has even undergone a renal dialysis (artificial kidney machine procedure)

Secondly the test for compatibility called the HLA typing, takes about 3weeks to get the the result. Now subtract this time from the marriage duration.

All in all, what I'm saying is, the man and his family likely knew about his kidney problems months before the marriage, but hid it from her.
He married that girl for the sole purpose of kidney donation.That alone is fraud, and the wife has no obligation to donate. She (the wife) is the victim here


I'm making the above impression ,as a doctor nearing being a nephrologist (kidney specialist).


And he somehow knew she was a match abi?
Re: My cousin who got married this year July is actually thinking of leaving the man by Offpoint: 9:49am On Sep 14, 2019
gidob:
What are you even saying...after writing so much, you made no point
I thought I'm the only one that saw that... very anyhow somebody.
Re: My cousin who got married this year July is actually thinking of leaving the man by DarkJeddi(m): 9:52am On Sep 14, 2019
meobizy:
It’s her marriage. She can do whatever the bleep she wants. OP, mind your business and stop airing her dirty laundry to strangers who don’t care to begin with.
This is a faceless forum and the OP can do what Furck she wants,she didn't mention any names..
Re: My cousin who got married this year July is actually thinking of leaving the man by tayoccu(m): 9:52am On Sep 14, 2019
Adinije:
I wonder why only few people are applying their reasoning in this matter. Everybody is shouting 'she doesn't love him yen yen yen' 'true love no dey again yen yen yen'
This family married this lady for her kidney period! KIDNEY FAILURE DOESN'T HAPPEN OVERNIGHT.

Like you can just take a kidney from anybody...
Re: My cousin who got married this year July is actually thinking of leaving the man by Nobody: 9:54am On Sep 14, 2019
truefood45:
it is a tradition of love where people believe marriage is for better for worse, if your cousin consider their request a threat, she should consider divorce, but she should mind the impart of divorce to the sick man, let her accept people who may call her wicked, and get what she want, solution is always available but is not known, her husband is cause of his own sickness and has continued to sustain it, sickness cannot grow in a body unless the body supported it, ignorance is not always enough to stop any sickness but knowledge can, try true food today, you can from there see the reason why many sickness become incurable, it is dilemma she either give it or she leave but knowledge can always save.




Are you confused or something?

Read what you posted here and give yourself a hard knock.

Anyway, the man made a wrong choice of wife.

Bet me, God want to save the man from the evil lady....


The man must survive and the lady will eventually regret.
Re: My cousin who got married this year July is actually thinking of leaving the man by tayoccu(m): 9:55am On Sep 14, 2019
Midas01:
Oh please shut up. The average man ditches his partner due to a life threatening medical condition and this is pure facts. Most women stick with their partners . Google it and cure your ignorance.

That's not true, been there, and I didn't ditch till she passed away. I know tons of guys who didn't ditch too
Re: My cousin who got married this year July is actually thinking of leaving the man by marvelous000: 9:57am On Sep 14, 2019
d33types:


Please, you'll need to take the IELTS. Although, your use of grammar, even though superfluous, passes very little message.

Your cohesion and coherence is even zero. Cheers
cheers to what? your cognitive mediocrity or your dearth of ability to deduce my comment, innocent of verbosity.

sincerely, I've ineffably tried to circumvent the urge to sound rhetorical , and it is by this triumph that I tell you that I've got infinitesimal tolerance for dilettantes, neither am i cut out to babysit people with lexical bankruptcy, nor will i pander to their inglorious whim.

now, shove your opinion up your rectum, and let me not hear anymore twaddle about grammar again. as you can see; I was having a civil discuss with pocohantas, before you came to conflagrate my countenance with otiose inanity

1 Like

Re: My cousin who got married this year July is actually thinking of leaving the man by phillippians(m): 10:02am On Sep 14, 2019
Acidosis:
Your cousin should first and foremost consider any effects donation might have on her overall health. Confirming that your cousin is a biological match means some steps already have been taken. Further 'light' tests should be considered to be sure there are no medical challenges (diabetes, HBP, etc.). Presence of health challenges automatically nullifies chances of donating to her husband. In my opinion, it's better to decline by dwelling on the aforementioned challenges.

Where there are no underlying health issues, no one should pressure her into giving her organ. Organ donation is more of sacrifice and selflessness than romantic and sexual love. It takes a special kind of love to give an organ to a spouse, sister, brother, parents or child, etc. What if she loves her husband but just can't trust the medical procedure? Some people don't trust medical doctors and surgical procedures. It's just what it is.

The mother of the man in context can also come forward and donate to her son. After all, people have made us believe that the love a mother has towards her son exceeds all forms of love. Let her come and prove that love.

Of course, a mother's love has no comparison. No boundaries my dear friend, but in all, his wife is supposed to stand by him in trying times like this. I lost an aunt to kidney problem in 2014. From time time of diagnosis to her death was just six months, the husband ran away two months into the illness, my grandma, that's my aunties mother was ever willing to donate for as we made arrangements to fly her to Indian. The husband whom my aunty have opened a business for severally and he lavishes it on young girls ran away on discovery that he was a perfect match and a potential donor. Smiles# he family members encourage it though, but he perceived the money for transplant was almost ready as the Nigerian Police force assisted my aunt who was a police inspector with 2million naira, we needed 6 million. Some families members aren't worth it self, some of her rich biological brothers refused to support courtesy to their wives! We put up her house for sale, chai come and see where people were pricing a six bedroom apartment anyhow. Life is deceiving sha!! Pray you don't experience kidney failure. Our money got exhausted on three-times a week dialysis! funny enough dear husband wanted to hijacked the money. Long story short, she gave up the ghost few days to her traveling abroad, the knowledge that her dear hubby have abandoned her hastened her death. After her burial, the same hubby came wanting to claim her house. The house my aunt single-handedly built even before they met. What a world! In-laws are scam, they are mostly after the interest of their very own, they will never allow their son/daughter to lay down their life in times like this, but when things are okay, you hear them calling you 'my in-law my in-law every now and then!
Re: My cousin who got married this year July is actually thinking of leaving the man by frankeinstein(m): 10:06am On Sep 14, 2019
LillyVal:
My cousin who got married this year July is actually thinking of leaving the marriage because the husband was diagnosed of Kidney failure and needs a transplant. The summary of the story is that the family of the man is expecting the newly married wife to donate one of her kidney to the man because my cousin is biological match to the husband, she and her family has said LAI LIA O, that his their child and they should find a way to go about it. After dragging this issues for some months na, my cousin family are pushing her to file for a divorce

a. would it be considered wickedness on her part considering, his not only the husband but PARTLY trained her in school too?

The marriage is less than a year no much money to even look for a seller, Aunty want to japa and leave the man

What do you think?

Do not let the charlatan deceive your cousin into giving hin one of her kidneys. Chronic renal disease is a progressive process that culminates in failure. So the man must have known he had the ailment but chose to hide it. The marriage was built on lies from the first instance. I'm sorry if this sounds harsh, but he should find alternative means. Your cousin would be very unwise to acquiesce his demands. On top wetin? 2 months marriage?

3 Likes

Re: My cousin who got married this year July is actually thinking of leaving the man by Duggedised12(f): 10:10am On Sep 14, 2019
Martinez39:
She is compatible with the husband; a human can run fine on a kidney; and the doctors to perform the surgery are available. That's all that's needed. The woman has no tangible excuse. She doesn't want to give. It's her right not to give but it stands that she doesn't love her husband.
will she be able to bear children with one kidney? Cos i have seen some comments on that.

And like you said, its not by force and no one should be guilty shamed into doing anything.Kidney failure just doesn't come out of nowhere,if it is established that he knew about his condition and kept it a secret until it degenerated to this point ,then she should walk away.

And also ,she doesn't need any tangible excuse to refuse to give her kidney,its hers ,and she has the right to give or not. The choice is hers ,she doesn't need to explain to anyone her reason. I personally will not give a man i have no child for my kidney and that is that. Certain things need logic not emotions.

1 Like 1 Share

Re: My cousin who got married this year July is actually thinking of leaving the man by LaExpert: 10:11am On Sep 14, 2019
d33types:
See the way people are using threats of marriage vows on the poor iyawo.

There are very few instances where kidney injury can lead to end stage renal disease (the stage where transplant is needed) all within 3months and affecting both kidneys.

Kidney failure has stages 1 to 5 and only poor management would make it progress to the last stage within 3months.It is even almost 99% likely that the man has even undergone a renal dialysis (artificial kidney machine procedure)

Secondly the test for compatibility called the HLA typing, takes about 3weeks to get the the result. Now subtract this time from the marriage duration.

All in all, what I'm saying is, the man and his family likely knew about his kidney problems months before the marriage, but hid it from her.
He married that girl for the sole purpose of kidney donation.That alone is fraud, and the wife has no obligation to donate. She (the wife) is the victim here


I'm making the above impression ,as a doctor nearing being a nephrologist (kidney specialist).


I expect you to know better if you're a doctor in training as mentioned.

You should know that kidney disease is not likely to be diagnosed until the signs are obvious and that would be about stage 4. You should also know that an acute failure may occur really fast though a transplant may not be needed.

By the way, the HLA test can take as little as 1 week to get results.
Re: My cousin who got married this year July is actually thinking of leaving the man by deavicky(m): 10:12am On Sep 14, 2019
This is why we told to marry for love. If there is love, the family will not even hear the matter.
Re: My cousin who got married this year July is actually thinking of leaving the man by madgoat(m): 10:13am On Sep 14, 2019
LillyVal:
My cousin who got married this year July is actually thinking of leaving the marriage because the husband was diagnosed of Kidney failure and needs a transplant. The summary of the story is that the family of the man is expecting the newly married wife to donate one of her kidney to the man because my cousin is biological match to the husband, she and her family has said LAI LIA O, that his their child and they should find a way to go about it. After dragging this issues for some months na, my cousin family are pushing her to file for a divorce

a. would it be considered wickedness on her part considering, his not only the husband but PARTLY trained her in school too?

The marriage is less than a year no much money to even look for a seller, Aunty want to japa and leave the man

What do you think?


That your cousin is a witch. She never loved the man or else she would not think twice of donating a kidney to a man she loves. I really hope something terribly bad happens to her and she will need the help of other.

1 Like

Re: My cousin who got married this year July is actually thinking of leaving the man by luluosas(m): 10:17am On Sep 14, 2019
In the small circle sense of mine, I will suggest that the wife donate her kidney to her husband if she truly loves him and married him on the basis of true love.
However, she shouldn't be coerced into rejecting or accepting the procedure, it should be her personal decision and should come from her alone.

Divorce? I don't think her family are thinking straight. Divorce in the first place is not the will of God, so they shouldn't push her into making ungodly decisions.

Again, what if she refuses to donate her kidney and the man got luck somewhere else, and both of them continued their marriage peacefully, but a time comes that something terrible happens to her and her husband's donor (anything of his body) would be the only option to save her life and the man turns it down, will you call the man a wicked man?

Let's judge this matter using ourselves. Can I willingly give my kidney to my wife/husband if I am the perfect donor if required?

I remembered when my wife underwent a CS during child birth. I was the first person to be tested for blood donation, but my blood failed the screening. So, it was three other people who volunteered and they donated their blood to her free, one being her younger sister, and the remaining two were my friends.

So, does she loves her husband? If she succeeded in divorcing this sick man now according to the wish of her family, and she remarry only to discover that her kidney is also required for her new husband, would she also divorce him and go for her third marriage?

May God help us to be wise according to God's love.
God bless you all readers of this comment of mine.
Shalom.

2 Likes

Re: My cousin who got married this year July is actually thinking of leaving the man by ChristianEast: 10:18am On Sep 14, 2019
Midas01:
Stop saying nonsense. There are actual facts that show that more men than women ditch their partners due to life threatening medical conditions.

My aunt just passed away due to a stroke about 4 days ago. Her husband who was a pastor left her when she fell ill.

If you doubt this I will pull up facts for you.
I hope you saw where I said "an average man"?
Re: My cousin who got married this year July is actually thinking of leaving the man by luluosas(m): 10:25am On Sep 14, 2019
Doc, you skipped the part that says the man even sponsored the woman in school before they eventually got married this July. Mind you, that point clearly shows that they have been in a long relationship before they finally agreed to marry, which makes it possible to some point that the woman was not entirely ignorant about the man's case if previous diagnosis exists. Don't crucify me please, I am a lame man in medical circles. Thanks.
d33types:
See the way people are using threats of marriage vows on the poor iyawo.

There are very few instances where kidney injury can lead to end stage renal disease (the stage where transplant is needed) all within 3months and affecting both kidneys.

Kidney failure has stages 1 to 5 and only poor management would make it progress to the last stage within 3months.It is even almost 99% likely that the man has even undergone a renal dialysis (artificial kidney machine procedure)

Secondly the test for compatibility called the HLA typing, takes about 3weeks to get the the result. Now subtract this time from the marriage duration.

All in all, what I'm saying is, the man and his family likely knew about his kidney problems months before the marriage, but hid it from her.
He married that girl for the sole purpose of kidney donation.That alone is fraud, and the wife has no obligation to donate. She (the wife) is the victim here


I'm making the above impression ,as a doctor nearing being a nephrologist (kidney specialist).

(1) (2) (3) (4) (5) (6) (7) (8) (9) (10) (Reply)

Chinese Man Rocks His Nigerian Wife's Behind At An Event (pics) / NAF Airlifts Conjoined Twins Back To Yenagoa After A Successful Surgery (photos) / Angela Nwosu: Why Family Members Of Some Rich People Are Poor

(Go Up)

Sections: politics (1) business autos (1) jobs (1) career education (1) romance computers phones travel sports fashion health
religion celebs tv-movies music-radio literature webmasters programming techmarket

Links: (1) (2) (3) (4) (5) (6) (7) (8) (9) (10)

Nairaland - Copyright © 2005 - 2024 Oluwaseun Osewa. All rights reserved. See How To Advertise. 77
Disclaimer: Every Nairaland member is solely responsible for anything that he/she posts or uploads on Nairaland.