Welcome, Guest: Register On Nairaland / LOGIN! / Trending / Recent / New
Stats: 3,150,729 members, 7,809,798 topics. Date: Friday, 26 April 2024 at 03:07 PM

Help, My Husband Is Causing Me Pain - Family (6) - Nairaland

Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Family / Help, My Husband Is Causing Me Pain (58970 Views)

Help! My Marriage Is Giving Me Pain. / An American Woman With Two Husbands And Three Children Is Causing A Stir Online / Sex Is Causing Problems In My Marriage, Help Me Save My Marriage (2) (3) (4)

(1) (2) (3) (4) (5) (6) (7) (8) (9) (10) ... (20) (Reply) (Go Down)

Re: Help, My Husband Is Causing Me Pain by healthserve(m): 11:46pm On Dec 17, 2019
Hizzy:

So you sabi this man wife pass him


Hypocrite. Show me anywhere I suggested that


I know a trickster when I see one. even planets afar I can interpret motives intelligently with serious accuracy. Now get off my mentions

2 Likes

Re: Help, My Husband Is Causing Me Pain by Conceptman: 11:46pm On Dec 17, 2019
TonyeBarcanista:
Omo these feminists are useless
their sense of reasoning has caused so many adjustable marriage to fail, any small thing na toxic, no wonder we have lots of single mothers out there and the funniest part be sey, many ladies dey out there now looking for where to put their head mostly don't even mind being a second or third wife. This Op no get problem at all but she wan cause wahala for herself, women wey fine sef dey hustle for husband

1 Like

Re: Help, My Husband Is Causing Me Pain by Augustap(f): 11:47pm On Dec 17, 2019
Forward77:
Take my advise.

Men are big babies and you know babies are possessive and stubborn.

You have to understand that he’s your husband and not just anyone else.

He said clearly that women who work are not submissive.
He’s right about that.

Don’t argue with him. Show him that you are not going to be rebellious.

Don’t nag at him Learn to negotiate with your husband. Treat him you will treat yourself, because you won’t nag at yourself, but you’ll rather negotiate.

Don’t destroy your marriage now It’s obvious that he’s no more comfortable being around you; you have to make him feel comfortable. To have him with you because if you start to loose him, small girls with big gODS with snap him up.

Marriage is not always easy There’re no perfect marriages, so learn to compromise and always apply negotiation to avoid having a destroyed home.

From my understanding, there’s something you’re doing that is making him take such a decision and others things he does.

We know you’re a graduate and want to work and all that, but lower your standards and remember that you’re married.

The secret weapon is NEGOTIATION

I wish you good luck
I could have agreed with almost everything you said but saying she should lower her standards, mehn! That's nonsense

8 Likes 1 Share

Re: Help, My Husband Is Causing Me Pain by Desric(m): 11:48pm On Dec 17, 2019
djon78:
Many men are acheic, how can you tell your wife not to work? Most times it is guys that led very dirty lives as singles. They think every woman is loose. Absolute nonsense. My dear you don enter, find ways to mitigate the situation. I am so sorry for you
In all your submissions, always remember the one man's food is another man's poison, and people shouldn't be called names for the choices they make for themselves. After all that's why we were created in large numbers, so of A's lifestyle doesn't suit you, B might
Re: Help, My Husband Is Causing Me Pain by Fountainofyouth(f): 11:48pm On Dec 17, 2019
Desric:
Again ask this question, what kind of job is the wife talking about and can that work sustain the family six months if the man loses his? Even if it can, one of the worst nightmares of any man will be to be out of job while the wife works, just a few men will be lucky not to consider suicide due to the reckless abuses they'll be getting from their wives.


So are you saying it is better for the wife to also be jobless when the husband loses his job? So it's better if they are both jobless and eating sand abi? Smh,

Even if the job can't sustain them for six months, What is wrong in her boasting of having her own money?

5 Likes

Re: Help, My Husband Is Causing Me Pain by ngwababe(f): 11:48pm On Dec 17, 2019
As if there's work somewhere waiting for you. See as you dey nag, as if say, if him leave you now, you go just find work now now now.

My sister, sit down and chop your husband's money. Save from whatever he gives you( maka tomorrow).

But then, any man that thinks like this, him money no dey last and they always end up frustrating their wives.

2 Likes

Re: Help, My Husband Is Causing Me Pain by midnighter(f): 11:50pm On Dec 17, 2019
Augustap:

I could have agreed with almost everything you said but saying she should lower her standards, mehn! That's nonsense

Thats why I couldnt like the post. I understand where hes coming from but theres too much oppression there

People should learn to compromise but not "lower their standards", those two things are different.

3 Likes

Re: Help, My Husband Is Causing Me Pain by healthserve(m): 11:50pm On Dec 17, 2019
Abuse is a norm to Nigerians so I'm not surprised and can't be. Many Nigerians don't know what healthy feels like. That's if they've ever experienced it or would ..

I'm sure we all can say Funke Akindele lands more jobs than JJC and works. And many women exists in the country who are working and are married. So how people automatically assume a working woman can't hold a marriage beats my imagination


Many Nigerians don't know what a clean psychological thing is and their ignorance would always see them fight even for primitive standards. This is the same logic that keeps politicians in positions they shouldn't have been in the first place. An expectation clueless Ness, ignorance and a damaged psyche

9 Likes 1 Share

Re: Help, My Husband Is Causing Me Pain by CsRockefeller(m): 11:51pm On Dec 17, 2019
Emaprince:
You are a FOOL!!!

In your usual irritating manner to hang a man, you always can't hide the uselessness inherent in you.

Cheat with his own daughter, just because he loves his daughter. Idiot!!!

I saw her post, pathetic!!

Lots of mad people here.

1 Like

Re: Help, My Husband Is Causing Me Pain by Fountainofyouth(f): 11:52pm On Dec 17, 2019
Forward77:



That’s the truest part most ladies ignore.
That’s actually why most ladies are either forever single or divorced


Calling you stupid is an insult to stupid people, I cannot waste my energy and time to reply you logically.

2 Likes

Re: Help, My Husband Is Causing Me Pain by Augustap(f): 11:52pm On Dec 17, 2019
midnighter:


Thats why I couldnt like the post. I understand where hes coming from but theres too much oppression there

People should learn to compromise but not "lower their standards", those two things are different.
Very different.... She should lower her standard and turn to a toy. The oppression was just too loud

6 Likes

Re: Help, My Husband Is Causing Me Pain by Nobody: 11:53pm On Dec 17, 2019
healthserve:



Hypocrite. Show me anywhere I suggested that


I know a trickster when I see one. even planets afar I can interpret motives intelligently with serious accuracy. Now get off my mentions
But you said that the man is subjecting her to slavery
Re: Help, My Husband Is Causing Me Pain by healthserve(m): 11:55pm On Dec 17, 2019
Hizzy:

But you said that the man is subjecting her to slavery


My dear go and read. Learn about bully tactics and manipulation. God epp your studies boy

3 Likes

Re: Help, My Husband Is Causing Me Pain by hkidola00(m): 11:55pm On Dec 17, 2019
Newguyhere:
upon say you Don marry, yansh still dey itch you to go taste outside prick bah undecided.
Your husband is a fool for marrying a supposedly "educated" lady like yourself. undecided.
Thats the usual excuse you guys use to start misbehaving. "I want to work"
work kee you dia.
Is taking care of the home and your kids not enough work undecided
i swear na only u get sense here... I av a gf wey just dey carry work work for head, wen u check most of demons, dey are idiotic cheats using work as cover up... dey want to use d work as a cover up to go hoe some place else.... imagine u stay in Ibadan, ur gf come say she don see one work for OGUN state say. by force she won do am, u come tell her say make she no go u go secure her a work where u both are... Abeg wetin dat one mean??
Re: Help, My Husband Is Causing Me Pain by ngwababe(f): 11:55pm On Dec 17, 2019
Desric:
Again ask this question, what kind of job is the wife talking about and can that work sustain the family six months if the man loses his? Even if it can, one of the worst nightmares of any man will be to be out of job while the wife works, just a few men will be lucky not to consider suicide due to the reckless abuses they'll be getting from their wives.

Men that thinks like these, always keep their wives and children frustrated in life. Because, you will want struggle till your last breath, just to provide for your family. I wonder what would have happened now, had it been my mum listened to my father then.

My brother, this country hard for one person to dey bring money ooo. See Otedola pikins dem, Dangote children, Buhari family, all our politicians, their children dey work oo, if not for any other thing, I know there are some things there fathers can never provide for them.

Bros, two hands are always better than one.

6 Likes

Re: Help, My Husband Is Causing Me Pain by Desric(m): 11:56pm On Dec 17, 2019
Fountainofyouth:



So are you saying it is better for the wife to also be jobless when the husband loses his job? So it's better if they are both jobless and eating sand abi? Smh,

Even if the job can't sustain them for six months, What is wrong in her boasting of having her own money?
You see why I said its all about conception and playing safe? After all, it's about ego. They should just find a way to massage one another's ego and be fine, from the woman's tone, she's sounding she's compelling the man, telling him that she's educated and cannot afford to waste all that or be idle instead of appealing to her husband to allow her work so as to assist him in taking care of the financial needs of their young family.

Her way of presentation might just be the wahala here. I know what I'm talking about, my own wife is a civil servant by the way.

2 Likes 1 Share

Re: Help, My Husband Is Causing Me Pain by midnighter(f): 11:56pm On Dec 17, 2019
Augustap:

Very different.... She should lower her standard and turn to a toy. The oppression was just too loud

Smh it is well
Re: Help, My Husband Is Causing Me Pain by Desric(m): 11:58pm On Dec 17, 2019
ngwababe:


Men that thinks like these, always keep their wives and children frustrated in life. Because, you will want struggle till your last breath, just to provide for your family. I wonder what would have happened now, had it been my mum listened to my father then.

My brother, this country hard for one person to dey bring money ooo. See Otedola pikins dem, Dangote children, Buhari family, all our politicians, their children dey work oo, if not for any other thing, I know there are some things there fathers can never provide for them.

Bros, two hands are always better than one.
Madam nobody is saying that the wife shouldn't work, what I'm saying is the need to do that in harmony with her spouse that's all, in case she feels the spouse can not support her chosen style of life, I think she'd better quit than be in a frustrating relationship.
Re: Help, My Husband Is Causing Me Pain by TonyeBarcanista(m): 11:59pm On Dec 17, 2019
Conceptman:
their sense of reasoning has caused so many adjustable marriage to fail, any small thing na toxic, no wonder we have lots of single mothers out there and the funniest part be sey, many ladies dey out there now looking for where to put their head mostly don't even mind being a second or third wife. This Op no get problem at all but she wan cause wahala for herself, women wey fine sef dey hustle for husband
OP is just creating problem where none is meant to exist. She will end up destroying her marriage herself

1 Like 1 Share

Re: Help, My Husband Is Causing Me Pain by Conceptman: 11:59pm On Dec 17, 2019
Fountainofyouth:



So are you saying it is better for the wife to also be jobless when the husband loses his job? So it's better if they are both jobless and eating sand abi? Smh,

Even if the job can't sustain them for six months, What is wrong in her boasting of having her own money?
what if the man decides to set up a biz for her? That woman doesn't have problem at all except she wants to create her problem.
Re: Help, My Husband Is Causing Me Pain by healthserve(m): 11:59pm On Dec 17, 2019
ngwababe:


Men that thinks like these, always keep their wives and children frustrated in life. Because, you will want struggle till your last breath, just to provide for your family. I wonder what would have happened now, had it been my mum listened to my father then.

My brother, this country hard for one person to dey bring money ooo. See Otedola pikins dem, Dangote children, Buhari family, all our politicians, their children dey work oo, if not for any other thing, I know there are some things there fathers can never provide for them.

Bros, two hands are always better than one.


My dad and mum met at a bank. Dad was a Don and could feed 100 people. She listened and retired. Till 20 years later she and the entire family suffered the decision. Men like that are con artists. I'm yet to meet a single married woman in the OP's condition to say they're happy in their marriage or aren't going through series of abuse. The moment she agrees to the logic, frustration and pain follows.

6 Likes 1 Share

Re: Help, My Husband Is Causing Me Pain by Conceptman: 12:03am On Dec 18, 2019
ngwababe:
As if there's work somewhere waiting for you. See as you dey nag, as if say, if him leave you now, you go just find work now now now.

My sister, sit down and chop your husband's money. Save from whatever he gives you( maka tomorrow).

But then, any man that thinks like this, him money no dey last and they always end up frustrating their wives.

better pikin, u reason the matter wella, she better start saving from what the husband dey drop and they should both plan on opening a biz closer to their house that will be bringing daily income not all these office jobs wey the salary na chicken change, salary no epp alot of people in this current state Nigeria dey, everyday now, people dey find ways to be their own boss. Oga go just dey use u dey balance him own account
Re: Help, My Husband Is Causing Me Pain by healthserve(m): 12:03am On Dec 18, 2019
Agbonkamen spotted. cheesy Yawa Don gas
Re: Help, My Husband Is Causing Me Pain by Nobody: 12:03am On Dec 18, 2019
healthserve:



My dear go and read. Learn about bully tactics and manipulation. God epp your studies boy
You said you support one feminist post or quota now did you know what she write before supporting her That's what I mean
She said the man is subjecting her to slavery
And if the man refused she should go and look for work by force
Man or guy use your sense not fingers
Re: Help, My Husband Is Causing Me Pain by Nobody: 12:05am On Dec 18, 2019
Forward77:
Take my advise.

Men are big babies and you know babies are possessive and stubborn.

You have to understand that he’s your husband and not just anyone else.

He said clearly that women who work are not submissive.
He’s right about that.

Don’t argue with him. Show him that you are not going to be rebellious.

Don’t nag at him Learn to negotiate with your husband. Treat him you will treat yourself, because you won’t nag at yourself, but you’ll rather negotiate.

Don’t destroy your marriage now It’s obvious that he’s no more comfortable being around you; you have to make him feel comfortable. To have him with you because if you start to loose him, small girls with big gODS with snap him up.

Marriage is not always easy There’re no perfect marriages, so learn to compromise and always apply negotiation to avoid having a destroyed home.

From my understanding, there’s something you’re doing that is making him take such a decision and others things he does.

We know you’re a graduate and want to work and all that, but lower your standards and remember that you’re married.

The secret weapon is NEGOTIATION

I wish you good luck
Men are big babies. See how you defend bad behaviour! If a man complained his wife behaved like this, would you say men are big babies?

Babies have no fvcking business getting married. If you're gonna be childish, stay single! Stop frustrating someone's daughter with your childish tantrums. Marriage is not a rehabilitation centre for badly behaved men.

12 Likes 2 Shares

Re: Help, My Husband Is Causing Me Pain by Conceptman: 12:05am On Dec 18, 2019
Madam, talk to ur husband to open shop for you salary jobs na slavery even salary no fit sustain the current hardship in the country, everyday people dey look for means to be their own boss
Re: Help, My Husband Is Causing Me Pain by healthserve(m): 12:05am On Dec 18, 2019
Hizzy:

You said you support one feminist post or quota now did you know what she write before supporting her That's what I mean
She said the man is subjecting her to slavery
And if the man refused she should go and look for work by force
Man or guy use your sense not fingers


We no dey the same league na.

And yes, he's reducing her to a slave. You don't break people down to earn their respect. No. To earn respect, you must be whole psychologically. As respect as wholeness is more internalised and personal than external.

Chew this capsule boy

1 Like

Re: Help, My Husband Is Causing Me Pain by imam07: 12:05am On Dec 18, 2019
Augustap:

Very different.... She should lower her standard and turn to a toy. The oppression was just too loud
Have u ladies, no u are a girl as i sensed from your comment. U hv not heard d from d husband side if d story, but u hv jumped to conclusion.
The woman's parents themselves know their daughter is stubborn. That is d reason she was told to listen to her husband.
Re: Help, My Husband Is Causing Me Pain by healthserve(m): 12:06am On Dec 18, 2019
Chi59:

Men are big babies. See how you defend bad behaviour! If a man complained his wife behaved like this, would you say men are big babies?

Babies have no fvcking business getting married. If you're gonna be childish, stay single! Stop frustrating someone's daughter with your childish tantrums. Marriage is not a rehabilitation centre for badly behaved men.


Babe. I owe you a drink... You get bad mouth cheesy

4 Likes

Re: Help, My Husband Is Causing Me Pain by UyaiIncomparabl(f): 12:07am On Dec 18, 2019
LesbianBoy:
My friend do what your husband said you should do. He married you with his hard-earned money and not the other way round angry

I'm very sure you're trolling. You can't be this senseless.

4 Likes

Re: Help, My Husband Is Causing Me Pain by Nobody: 12:10am On Dec 18, 2019
healthserve:



We no dey the same league na.

And yes, he's reducing her to a slave. You don't break people down to earn their respect. No. To earn respect, you must be whole psychologically. As respect as wholeness is more internalised and personal than external.

Chew this capsule boy
Yeah we no de the same league
I agreed but my league is harder and tougher more than yours
You might be richer but in terms of stars you can't compare Laliga to premier league


Stop supporting what you can't do
Do you know why the man refused to allow his wife to work
She's 24 she's too young and she can be easily deceived
Re: Help, My Husband Is Causing Me Pain by Nobody: 12:10am On Dec 18, 2019
healthserve:



Babe. I owe you a drink... You get bad mouth cheesy
Better a bad mouth than blind eyes or an empty brain. What is bad is bad. In this economy, the man wants her to depend on him hand and foot, is that not bad?

2 Likes

(1) (2) (3) (4) (5) (6) (7) (8) (9) (10) ... (20) (Reply)

Should I Confront My Brother's Wife? / My Wife Has Taken My April Fool's Joke All Wrong...please Help!! / "My Wife Is 21" - 60-Year-Old Kano Man Accused Of Marrying 11-Year-Old (Pix)

(Go Up)

Sections: politics (1) business autos (1) jobs (1) career education (1) romance computers phones travel sports fashion health
religion celebs tv-movies music-radio literature webmasters programming techmarket

Links: (1) (2) (3) (4) (5) (6) (7) (8) (9) (10)

Nairaland - Copyright © 2005 - 2024 Oluwaseun Osewa. All rights reserved. See How To Advertise. 72
Disclaimer: Every Nairaland member is solely responsible for anything that he/she posts or uploads on Nairaland.