i mean because like anything African, the principles and styles of the West is a contradiction. Where most African cultures emphasize responsibility, western cultures praise carelessness such as cheating and having sex/children out of wedlock (??). When African couples emigrate to the west, the temptations are there and the way the societies of the west are, if you have anything named principle you are "behind".

[b]The black male is highly despised in the west so his worth is supposed to be minimum to none. They praise black women and claim we are the "ambitious of the race" and therefore grant us scholarships and drill it in our heads that we are not to be "second class" to no black man (ie "rescue mission to Africa to end "suffering of women" or female circumcision). The feminist movements have a blast "recruiting" African women as they regard African culture as backward and as a result you now have the AWs behaving like the AAs.

The concept of marriage in the "old African days" were the man was the provider and the woman the child barer and nurturer. Now I am hearing more and more African women telling me that that life style is oppressive.  Shocked and that they will not stand for it. There is a false sense of "Independence" within the black female population that to be independent means you need no man and should therefore have an attitude. So the African woman who comes to the west thinking she is now "free" adapts to the environment by imitating. The African man is no exception to this issue:

Some of them come to the west taking on the black AMerican mentality: players, gangsters; etc. and indeed some of them take male dominance to a WHOLE new level![/b]


Well put!

@abeg-abeg,
I strongly believe u are in the bathroom doing what u know how to do best, u know it, washing undies 4 her, !"argh"! you make feel sick,
next time let us know your level of brainwash, and if you are a woman, dont ever think that kind of negative thought would work on us,
let the westerners celebrate their highest level of failed marriages as it is today,in africa, we are happy with our records in africa in keeping couples together, by the way ,it is a free word, choose!

Im not sure who said it but the line 'the black man is depised in the west' is rubbish. I would like to know where they got there figures or facts from.

@poster,one thing u might not understand is the fact that not all africans
born and raise in africa agrees a %100 with what our culture and so call
moral values has to offer,some just follow it because they care so much abt
what the society will say if they don't.So when they come abroad it an oppurtunity
to exibit this hidded side of them,especially when its a free world like the US OF A.
We african men really wanna eat our cakes and have it,while we criticize our women
if they do the same,we cheat this women alot all in the name of culture and values
while we expect them to stay silent and digest everything we do to them.There should
always be checks and balances in everthign what you can't take don't give,and not to
say that our women sometimes don't take advantage of the fact that they could now dail
911 at the slightess scratch they receive from you,but in most cases we men are always the
the ones who provokes such behavior.And if u think the western man who made laws to
empower women is stupid,its has been proven that they are not, in the 2008 US elections
where they would rather vote for a black man to be come president of the united states
than to see a white woman rule the world strongest country.So after all been said and done
they still have limitations to what they will allow or accept from a woman.The problem with we african
men is we are so tied to the past,and we have such empty egos,like for real what is wrong if you occasionally
help your wife to take care of shores that we both agree is for a woman,or are this women supposed to maids
or slaves all in the name of marriage.When we talk about the western world opening our women's eye,why don't
we still kill twin babies when they are born believing that they ar evil,we no what our culture is and we still embrace it,but don't be to tied to it,cuz it will do us more harm than good on the long run.

@Blazay omo ale, u crack me up no be small "living in bondage"
best comment i don hear so far
"living in bondage" i die laughing

@poster,one thing u might not understand is the fact that not all africans
born and raise in africa agrees a %100 with what our culture and so call
moral values has to offer,some just follow it because they care so much abt
what the society will say if they don't.So when they come abroad it an oppurtunity
to exibit this hidded side of them,especially when its a free world like the US OF A.
We african men really wanna eat our cakes and have it,while we criticize our women
if they do the same,we cheat this women alot all in the name of culture and values
while we expect them to stay silent and digest everything we do to them.There should
always be checks and balances in everthign what you can't  take don't give,and not to
say that our women sometimes don't take advantage of the fact that they could now dail
911 at the slightess scratch they receive from you,but in most cases we men are always the
the ones who provokes such behavior.And if u think the western man who made laws to
empower women is silly,its has been proven that they are not, in the 2008 US elections
where they would rather vote for a black man to be come president of the united states
than to see a white woman rule the world strongest country.So after all been said and done
they still have limitations to what they will allow or accept from a woman.The problem with we african
men is we are so tied to the past,and we have such empty egos,like for real what is wrong if you occasionally
help your wife to take care of shores that we both agree is for a woman,or are this women supposed to maids
or slaves all in the name of marriage.When we talk about the western world opening our women's eye,why don't
we still kill twin babies when they are born believing that they ar evil,we no what our culture is and we still embrace it,but don't be to tied to it,cuz it will do us more harm than good on the long run.

My friend you haven't spoken like an articulate fellow here. It is an exposure to the western ways of life that will make an African born child to challenge his/her own tradition (knowing that humans like to try new things).

Western culture is attractive now because they are the shinning one. I believe thousand of years ago African(Egypt) had it the later Arabs. A time will come when the western life that people shout about will fail. This is why they(western nations ie; USA, Germany, UK, France etc) are uniting their self to remain stronger.

Everything you see today has political goal behind it. Cling to your own culture and be proud of it.

The women empowerment you talked about has a political goal and the gain/glory goes to men in politics, those women are tools. Knowing that Africans and Arab cultures are against it but the women embrace it . These therefore makes those countries wicked/barbaric to women; weak; not fit for power.

After the women empowerment scheme they will always come up with other ideals/hypes. It will never end. You need to wake up from western hype, it is not real; it is a fraud; it is politics.

@ excoba101 very well said my brother,but let me remind you of somethigns that might be missing in your reasoning.
1.like the saying goes"na condition make crayfish bend" brings me back to my point that just
because you was born into a culture doesn't necesarily mean that you agree a %100 with
the believes and practises of that culture and i put it to you that isn't some aspects of your
culture or tradition you wish to compromise if you in the position to? and let me shed light
on another instance of our religion today,before the coming of the white men to africa didn't
we have our own religion practised amongs various ethnic groups e.g sango,ogun,obatala etc
but this days you dear not tell it to anybody that,that is what u still practise without them staying
a distance from you assuming you a either a pagan or ritualist.Now i put it to you that are this
same people not africans and HAS THE CULTURE THAT ONCE USED TO BE VERY STRONG,NOT BEEN
CHALENGED OR NOT.
2.points of correction woman empowerment is not a political agenda like you put it
its is just a review of womens right and to ensure that they are not just taken advantage
of by we men,just because they are the weaker vessels,and that is why i mentioned intially
that no matter how this westerners empower women,it will still be over their dead bodies to
watch them grow so big to rule over the world and most especially men.
3. nothign last forever my brother,the united states might be world power today doesn't mean
it will always be like that,that we both know.

@ excoba101 very well said my brother,but let me remind you of somethigns that might be missing in your reasoning.
1.like the saying goes"na condition make crayfish bend" brings me back to my point that just
    because you was born into a culture doesn't necesarily mean that you agree a %100 with
    the believes and practises of that culture and i put it to you that isn't some aspects of your
    culture or tradition you wish to compromise if you in the position to? and let me shed light
     on another instance of our religion today,before the coming of the white men to africa didn't
     we have our own religion practised amongs various ethnic groups e.g sango,ogun,obatala etc
      but this days you dear not tell it to anybody that,that is what u still practise without them staying
      a distance from you assuming you a either a pagan or ritualist.Now i put it to you that are this
      same people not africans and HAS THE CULTURE THAT ONCE USED TO BE VERY STRONG,NOT BEEN
      CHALENGED OR NOT.
   2.points of correction woman empowerment is not a political agenda like you put it
      its is just a review of womens right and to ensure that they are not  just taken advantage
      of by we men,just because they are the weaker vessels,and that is why i mentioned intially
      that no matter how this westerners empower women,it will still be over their dead bodies to
      watch them grow so big to rule over the world and most especially men.
  3.  nothign last forever my brother,the united states might be world power today doesn't mean
       it will always be like that,that we both know.

1) Condition make crayfish bend can be viewed from both sides.
i)  Because i was born into African way of life i have no right to challenge my culture
ii) Because i have access from child birth as a modern person to the current dominant life style(western way of life which is very attractive) makes me to challenge my own culture

If we weren't exposed to western culture every body born in Africa would embrace only African culture 100% as did our ancestors. You will help yourself more if you read more of ancient African literature than histories of how white people came to Africa chit. Ancient Africans lived peacefully and if there was any acts that didn't go well, there was always a revolutionist who would speak against it and it will be changed. Our culture was the political system of those days. Politics didn't stated today, it had been since men evolved.

You talk about worship of sango and other demi god been done away with after the white people invaded Africa, but you are wrong, these acts exist in an attractive format to us today for example "Heroes" are celebrated, even in white world yes? They only took away our own and gave us theirs or they took our own and refined it and gave it back to us, this is the leadership they have over us.

2) I repeat, women empowerment is a scam. They are tools used by men in politics. And who said we treated women bad in Africa anyway. It is today we are made to believe so, apart from polygamy what would a husband wouldn't do for his wife(ves) and family? Read about ancient African histories women are sacred.

3) Don't be carried away with their hypes/theories. The best thing white people are known for his hiding/covering(greatest scammers ever known) truths just to stay on top.

Question: What more do you know about Africa apart from, white men came and took slaves and gave us Christianity and other chit? Do you think there is more to Africa before that era ;before Africans discovered white men or white men discovered African?

I have noticed that slaves from Africa are the ones trying to find out truth about ancient Africa tracing their origin while we that are home born feel reluctant.
The link below is a fact about Africa

http://yeyeolade./2007/03/03/the-ancient-jews-were-black/

http://www.africaresource.com/rasta/sesostris-the-great-the-egyptian-hercules/black-african-origins-of-the-ancient-greeks-dr-anu-mauro/

I could give you many more if you want. Try too find out about the rich and good culture of African. Don't give in to white washing.

@excoba dude your perspective will always be your,and mines will always be mines
we don't really have to see thigns the same way really,but i just think you would need
a lil more exposure,not just what u read from websites that have facts that has been
distorted,you need to see and experience whats happening on the other side of the
globe,probably you would have a better understandind and depths into this matter.

~~~Thanks for standing to your point of view in disguise and talking trash. Where do you think i live? What degree or level of education do you suppose i have?

Exposure my azz.

Advise: If you are African remain an African. There is nothing wrong with it. The rest is politics.

Wow @ abeg-abeg. You hit the nail right on the head. Educated illiterates indeed. Common sense isn't so common.

@ geometry, I'm not sure if you realize this but divorce rates of Nigerians home AND abroad are steadily rising. No one (women I should probably say) is willing to suffer in silence anymore, ESPECIALLY if you grew up seeing your own mother being treated like horribly and stifling it all in the name of marriage.

Of course we an see that from your post! It is really not common.

look at the pot calling the kettle black. Take the beam out of your own eye before acknowledging my splinter of a grammatical error which does not equate to lack of common sense but just quick typing Mr. Professor.

Thanks. Anthing else?

Tink_sh:

Im not sure who said it but the line 'the black man is depised in the west' is rubbish. I would like to know where they got there figures or facts from.

check this link out,

http://jeffreyw.multiply.com/journal/item/20/Africans_the_Most_Hated_Race_of_All

excoba101:


You talk about worship of sango and other demi god been done away with after the white people invaded Africa, but you are wrong, these acts exist in an attractive format to us today for example "Heroes" are celebrated, even in white world yes? They only took away our own and gave us theirs or they took our own and refined it and gave it back to us, this is the leadership they have over us.

All cultures of the world has these demi-gods stories, the greeks, the romans, the vikings, the aztecs etc, thor was the god of thunder for norsemen, so how would you know that heroes was adapted from the African ones, pls lets be more objective.

(2)
Almost all cultures of the world have treated men as second-class citizens, men have always have more rights than women, for most people this is unacceptable and since we are all humans facing the same challenges of survival, this is unacceptable, There are lots of places in africa where you don't even have an opinion as a woman, maybe if you were a woman in those societies, you would understand, even in the villages, these women are not happy about the fact that they can't even talk, its a human thing, not about Africa or wherever


Am from Edo State, i am not proud to be from there and i am not ashamed to be from Edo either, am just from Edo, everybody has to come from somewhere, its called the accident of birth. I have read i made researches about culture and race issues and i sill find time to do so, these people you call slaves, i would say they were kidnapped-people, have been enlightened and educated for a longer period than we do, they have access to information and other resources than us here, and they have a greater need, a desire a longing to find out these things, why would most of us who have always been here, heard about our history from proverbs, tales, festivals etc now have an overpowering desire to do all those researches.

I hate when African sisters imitate oyinbo culture in a wrong way and now tag themselves as "independent" just because they earn some few 100€/$. Or when they think they can´t cook or take care of their normal household responsibilities anymore. My dear sisters your role is your role anyday-anytime-anywhere. I´ve been married to an oyinbo for 8 years now, she´s a highly educated senior accountant, born with silver spoon with parents owning companies all over Germany (ajebo oyinbo) she prepares breakfast every morning, prepare our launch boxes for the office, comes home afterwork & cook all sorts of German, chinese & African food:- pounded yam with egusi, ogbono,rice & dodo with powerful red stew decorated with assorted meat she knows I´m the head of the family & my decision is final (even on our kids issues) yet she supports my naijaness. sisters, wake up!!! don´t adopt a mentality that even responsible and well cultured oyinbos don´t support!! otherwise we go bown all of una finally

we must learn to keep our values as Africans

furacao:

One must cease from making such generalisations. Not all Western people behave in the manner you have described. You must separate the conservative West from the secular West when describing things. You seem to have focussed on the extreme secular society. Of course there are more liberties in the West, but to  say that an African man not being able to hit his wife when she "is out of line" as you say, is wrong is a sexist thing to say. The bible says that women are to submit to their husbands, but that men are to love their wives, and they love themselves. As their own. It's a two-way thing, mutually beneficial. Now, hitting someone is not an act of love. Shoving someone around is not love. The same man would think twice about hitting another man in public!! And in the situation you describe, a man hitting a woman is supposed to be a show of authority.

With regards to helping out in the kitchen or with the children, one must realise that the circumstances in Africa (that  
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dictated that women alone "owned" the kitchen and were practically solely responsible for raising the children) are different from those in the West. Women in that description in Africa who did such did not go to work, leaving the house at 7am and returning home at 9pm. In the West, and even in Africa now, such is the case. Women work long hours and contribute to the home financially.

Let us look at the big picture. As men are physically stronger, and women weaker vessels, the relationship should be one of love, and assistance and mutual understanding, not of insecurity and the need to suppress one gender or the other.

Women in the West are like women anywhere in the world, some are wayward and some are respectable. Some are good and some are bad. Just like men. And it doesn't matter what ethnicity or Race they are from.

God created male and female equal, but different.

[b][size=18pt] Absolutely! How I wish many ladies on here have independent minds/thinking like you to challenge if not by any thing else, by their acts, demonstrations, one voice and literature i.e. writings, the injustices/unfairness and pain our culture subdue women into would have been gently and steadily dismantled over time (because, such actions improve things e.g. the Aba women riots in 1927 changed the unfair tax system imposed by the British in Nigeria) otherwise , we would not be here arguing about these things.

Glad, that men/women not only travel the world and bring back ideas learned from other cultures but also, the advancement in technology beaming in our lounges all over Africa are helping in not only diluting but also, changing this our authentic and entrenched cultures thus, influences from other parts of the world are now eroding ours thus, empowering women to ask for their rights and get it hence, the scare among Nigeria men as shown by their complaints on here and in society.

But I say, chill men, chill - there's nothing to be scared off, if you know who you are/confident in yourselves! If men in order societies are not perturbed by women seeking their rights and getting it so, why you?  Again, it points to differences in cultural beliefs/values - Nigerian man likes to be served/worshipped as gods because, they believe men are superior to women therefore, women are created specially to serve men and be used as they pleases.  For example, an African women don't even have rights over their own bodies - in marriage the husbands detect how many children the wives should bear for them. Imagine, the fairness here?

He put in the babies, the woman carries the the babies for 9months risking her precious life in the process, go through the pain and complications of labour, delivering, breast feeding, nurturing and raising the babies until about 1yr at most and there you have it - he climbs her again

Thus, he would continues until a basket is full of children he wants and which he has difficulty feeding and educating thereby, leaving them to fend for themselves in the open world without skills of any kinds, which is a product of or breeding ground for all sorts of crime - prostitution, armed robbery, 419's etc This is our culture and many of us here, recognise this picture and if we don't, our parents certainly do.

In fact, this is nothing but evil and overt 'selfishness' of our men,  simply because, a man wants to satisfy his ego and standing in his community.  Or should we talk about issue of genital mutilation of women (not by choice rather, as some on here, would now point to Western Plastic Surgery as a way to justify our culture from this this evil act, that has been, and is still going on in most parts of Africa and some parts of Nigeria).  

Again, why perform this evil act on another human being, if not the need to control women?  To prevent them from developing sexual urges and enjoying sexual experiences in adulthood as enjoyment of such basically, seem to be, a  reserved for our men.  Glad, some modern ones, prefers sharing these experiences with their women and I ask, what's wrong with a women reaching orgasm and shouting it out?  Its natural and that's how it's meant to be, isn't it? So, why make a woman feel trashy, if she expresses these feelings - if not men's ignorance!

Thirdly, should we talk about the painful experiences of enforced and loveless marriages some women endure - marriages they do not want/agreed to.  How can anyone explain this wicked act that are still being perpetrated on women in the name of culture.  A woman must marry, otherwise, she would become single mothers - having babies from everywhere.  

I ask again, for the sake of fairness and justice, is marriage compulsory? And who is making these single women pregnant? Na Tree or Aeroplane? No bi men?  And why didn't you all kill them for climbing these women and making babies with them, several times? I want an answer?

Now, you blame it all on the woman, isn't it?  That's African justice and fairness! Some, would argue, after all, men did those things all over the world.  So--- And, that justified it? Perhaps, they did but these cultures have not only changed with time but have moved on, in favour of the needs of current society, except Africans.  

Our culture are so entrenched and set on stones -dare you go against the grain? Na lie for them. They are beginning to see it now, as women are being empowered, we will change things we consider unfair and against us, just as women in other cultures have done - time, socio-economic and political situation of the time will move things to a different level and change the entire male domininated African cultures. Some of us will live to see it happen. 

As we can see, for an African man control power and authority are important traits, in his disposition - a part in the recognition of their malehood thus, the need to control women emanate from their insecurities which can only be traced back to their childhoods - how they were raised e.g. parents raising confident young men, ensuring no favouritism among sibblings, no undue attention being paid and treating their golden sons like a python egg and, at the expense of their sisters.  

Also, parent should reassure their young sons, that the existence of their sisters/women generally, does not threaten their positions in the family and that their sisters are here to share everything with them because, they are part and parcel of the family - good or bad and, mean it.

Now, this takes us to another level of the argument that I would rather leave for now - family inheritance because, a lot of worms will wriggle out. However, its obvious that secured men, have no issues with women demanding their rights - they have no time for these kind of things because, they are seriously engaged and busy with important issues at hand i.e. thinking out ideas that would help mankind e.g. creating, inventing and competing with men from other cultures/countries either in being the first to climb Everest, to invent trains, aeroplane, ship, cars, satellites, mobile phones etc to worrying about women taking over the world.  Now, tell me, what did our men invent other than intimidation, subjugation and control of women and promotion of polygamism.  

Since, recognition, respect power and authority is so important to them in relationships e.g. an understanding of who is the head and in charge of the family (as if we women don't know that), why didn't they exert all that energy in the above areas that seriously challenged their intelligence, creative thinking abilities and determination to make their own mark on this planet earth instead of harassing, controlling women and, producing baskets full of children they can not feed, educate or even provide proper training that would gain them technical skills/hand-work that would benefit them in life.  

Instead, all, they do and continues to do is, to blame, blame and, blame the white man - white man did this and that to us.  Yes, they did those things to benefit their children because, they love their children and did not want them to struggle much in life and their great, great grand children are benefiting from it, even till today. But, I ask, which one did our own forefathers do to help alleviate suffering for the generation following them?  And what are our generation doing right now, or going to do to help the next generation after us NOTHING!

So, for a change, we must stop blaming and do something, instead! And, for those men who think women are in their way, I suggest you go home now and put on your thinking caps, occupy yourselves with something tangible to do, something good to be remembered for, by the next generation instead of harassing and controlling women - leave us  alone - we are not going to take the world and run off, ok!!  [/size][/b]

yankite:

@poster,one thing u might not understand is the fact that not all africans
born and raise in africa agrees a %100 with what our culture and so call
moral values has to offer,some just follow it because they care so much abt
what the society will say if they don't.So when they come abroad it an oppurtunity
to exibit this hidded side of them,especially when its a free world like the US OF A.
We african men really wanna eat our cakes and have it,while we criticize our women
if they do the same,we cheat this women alot all in the name of culture and values
while we expect them to stay silent and digest everything we do to them.There should
always be checks and balances in everthign what you can't take don't give,and not to
say that our women sometimes don't take advantage of the fact that they could now dail
911 at the slightess scratch they receive from you,but in most cases we men are always the
the ones who provokes such behavior.And if u think the western man who made laws to
empower women is silly,its has been proven that they are not, in the 2008 US elections
where they would rather vote for a black man to be come president of the united states
than to see a white woman rule the world strongest country.So after all been said and done
they still have limitations to what they will allow or accept from a woman.The problem with we african
men is we are so tied to the past,and we have such empty egos,like for real what is wrong if you occasionally
help your wife to take care of shores that we both agree is for a woman,or are this women supposed to maids
or slaves all in the name of marriage.When we talk about the western world opening our women's eye,why don't
we still kill twin babies when they are born believing that they ar evil,we no what our culture is and we still embrace it,but don't be to tied to it,cuz it will do us more harm than good on the long run.

GBAM

I hate when African sisters imitate oyinbo culture in a wrong way and now tag themselves as "independent" just because they earn some few 100 €/$. Or when they think they can´t cook or take care of their normal household responsibilities anymore. My dear sisters your role is your role anyday- anytime-anywhere. I´ve been married to an oyinbo for 8 years now, she´s a highly educated senior accountant, born with silver spoon with parents owning companies all over Germany (ajebo oyinbo) she prepares breakfast every morning, prepare our launch boxes for the office, comes home afterwork & cook all sorts of German, chinese & African food:- pounded yam with egusi, ogbono,rice & dodo with powerful red stew decorated with assorted meat she knows I´m the head of the family & my decision is final (even on our kids issues) yet she supports my naijaness. sisters, wake up!!! don´t adopt a mentality that even responsible and well cultured oyinbos don´t support!! otherwise we go bown all of una finally

@bavarian, olboy, u sabi lie o! Young ladies, don't believe this man, he's misleading you. Even my great grand mother did not do those things for my great grand father
Na my daughter go make breakfast, lunch and dinner; make bed, sweep and wash dishes; work, buy groceries and nurse kids all at the same time ?

yankite:

@poster,one thing u might not understand is the fact that not all africans
born and raise in africa agrees a %100 with what our culture and so call
moral values has to offer,some just follow it because they care so much abt
what the society will say if they don't.So when they come abroad it an oppurtunity
to exibit this hidded side of them,especially when its a free world like the US OF A.
We african men really wanna eat our cakes and have it,while we criticize our women
if they do the same,we cheat this women alot all in the name of culture and values
while we expect them to stay silent and digest everything we do to them.There should
always be checks and balances in everthign what you can't take don't give,and not to
say that our women sometimes don't take advantage of the fact that they could now dail
911 at the slightess scratch they receive from you,but in most cases we men are always the
the ones who provokes such behavior.And if u think the western man who made laws to
empower women is silly,its has been proven that they are not, in the 2008 US elections
where they would rather vote for a black man to be come president of the united states
than to see a white woman rule the world strongest country.So after all been said and done
they still have limitations to what they will allow or accept from a woman.The problem with we african
men is we are so tied to the past,and we have such empty egos,like for real what is wrong if you occasionally
help your wife to take care of shores that we both agree is for a woman,or are this women supposed to maids
or slaves all in the name of marriage.When we talk about the western world opening our women's eye,why don't
we still kill twin babies when they are born believing that they ar evil,we no what our culture is and we still embrace it,but don't be to tied to it,cuz it will do us more harm than good on the long run.

@Yankite

You are very articulate to me! especially the boldened part. This is the main issue.

African Mariage can survive in the west but with the same degree of failure as it is for western people.

Marriages in Africa has a higher survival rate due to a culture that maybe suppressive to women.

Whereas in the west marriages generally are susceptible to divorce perhaps and probably because more choices, and a

lesser burden of stigma are given to women.

If a husband understands this and affords his wife the matrimonial liberties encouraged in a western country. then the

survivability of the union climbs exponentially.

my two cents.

nitewalker:

African Mariage can survive in the west but with the same degree of failure as it is for western people.

Marriages in Africa has a higher survival rate due to a culture that maybe suppressive to women.

Whereas in the west marriages generally are susceptible to divorce perhaps and probably because more choices, and a

lesser burden of stigma are given to women.

If a husband understands this and affords his wife the matrimonial liberties encouraged in a western country. then the

survivability of the union climbs exponentially.

my two cents.

And the western marriages have been surviving?

Now, this takes us to another level of the argument that I would rather leave for now - family inheritance because, a lot of worms will wriggle out. However, its obvious that secured men, have no issues with women demanding their rights - they have no time for these kind of things because, they are seriously engaged and busy with important issues at hand i.e. thinking out ideas that would help mankind e.g. creating, inventing and competing with men from other cultures/countries either in being the first to climb Everest, to invent trains, aeroplane, ship, cars, satellites, mobile phones etc to worrying about women taking over the world.

@theblessed i have always respect ur post includin dis quote,i will learn to see hw much i can work harder for d generation to com and benefit somethin.

agitator:

And the western marriages have been surviving?

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Some, and with it, are the marriages of those Africans who understands and practices equally shared rights.

Remember that the ambiguity of the posters question lends one to assume that those marriages faithed to failure will fail regardless .

That's why I infer ed that the most effecting influence on marriage is environment. The western environment due to its empowerment of women experiences higher divorce rate, because a person empowered has more choices.
In essence African marriage in the west survives if both partners treat each other as equals.

my two cents.

To the person that said I dont know where it is acceptable to hit a woman

This is my reply. I dont know where it is acceptable for a woman to hit a man either. However some women do it. And my own rule is simple. The day a woman especially my wife hits me then I know that relationship is over. To make sure she knows it is over - I will return the hit with interest.

As for why they cant survive - it is simple African values defer from Western values. The person on the first page said it perfectly!