Fellas!

I want you all to pay attention to me here because what I am about to ask you may upset ya, now I just thought of this after remembering what I heard another African brother say this, PLEASE DON'T TELL ME THIS NOT TRUE

He said that NONE of his girlfriend's exes is to be present AT NO GIVEN TIME for example if she see them on the street she is not to speak but wave and keep it moving. Now I thought it was just HIM that tripping and said each to their own UNTIL HE SAID THIS IS AN AFRICAN THING that I don't know nothing about.

He said that it is a sign of disrespect when a woman is still having friendship or relationship with her exes if she is in a new relationship. Is that true? Why wouldn't a woman not have friendship with her exes?

I guess he's right . . ,  Bringing it down to some nigerian girls' mentality . . . . .They would rather make friends with pigs and rats than to make friends with  their exes . . . .Might be they can't just resist the feeelings or  . . . . . . . ,

Hey Dsense Suga

Now, you wouldn't mind your girl hanging out with her exes? Be real boo, this your mummy you talkin to!

Hey Eve honey
Definitely i would mind . . .Because it happened recently and i could recall how i reacted . . . It's not that easy though ,But jealosy takes a huge impact in field. . . . . . . .If u re the type that's so envious u would mind of course,However if u re not ,u won't . . . ,   .So it's all about feelings and understanding ''sometimes''.

He said that it is a sign of disrespect when a woman is still having friendship or relationship with her exes if she is in a new relationship.

that's too true, why would she keep a string attached with her Ex? it shows lack of disrespect, its never done on our African soil, many other guys would accept my opinion too.!!!

[color=#990000][/color]Haba! They are also human beings now. As for me o, they could still be friends as long as the ex also sees it as friendship and not want to use that as a medium to get back.

There is nothing to it because I believe friendships can still be kept without intimacy,funny enough I became friends with my girls ex and I allowed their friendship cos I felt really secured in the relationship.

If the guy refuses to allow his girl to associate with her ex, it could be cos he is jealous and insecure. On the other hand he might suspect the fact that his girl could go back to her ex and try and prevent it. It all depends on trust. I don't know how it is seen as a sign of disrespect

Its a complete display of[b] IMMATURITY[/b] on the guys part== That is never a practise anywhere in AFRICA-- Its a behaviour he chose to practise and that shows how matured he is---- there is nothing wrong be friends with your ex.

So you AFRICAN BROTHERS don't mind your GIRL OR WIFE having exes as her friends? I know damn well SOME of yall lying! I know yall wouldn't be too happy if she confides in him and they seems pretty close, I know men can be a little jealous but at the same time trust their girl, BUT YOU GOT YOUR EYES PEELED, right brothers? I know I am right!

Hell no!!

what kinda friends??

I know what might happen if I am alone with my ex so I ensure we keep away. I may not be able to resist them so I make sure I stay away.


So with a thinking like that, why would I be comfortable seeing my wife hang out with her ex?

hell no 3x!!

Koyoke,

So my husband and his friends weren't tripping when they say that is AN INSULT TO THE AFRICAN men for their wives to consort with their exes?

well, true but not only African men.

Remember what happened in the movie Soul Food - when the guy (Mekhi Phifer) found out his wife (Nia Long) went to talk to her ex about getting him a job??

yea!

Yeah I remembered! It wasnt pretty! He lost his cool and Bird was like all I did was asked him to give you a job!

Do you think it an ego thing for men seeing their wives with their exes?

An ego thing for both sexes really.

favors are like debt you know - you may have to pay back in cash or kind.

. . and whose spouse would want that

I think men have it harder time accepting their wives having exes as friends than women,

Women will look at it like well she must not be all that if she is an ex so she is not threaten too much but then a man would be like why is she still consorting with him especially the way she been saying he a dog or wasn't a good man etc,

Men take it to heart more than women and women wouldn't trip too much about their man consorting with the exes,

I agree that men are more jealous.

One time a male friend of mine came to visit when my husband wasn't home and he was just a friend not an ex or anything. He have shared that he have taken interest in me but I was already involved and said he want to remain my friend.  I didn't take it as an issue, my husband took it as an issue saying that no man should have been in the house where he wasn't there and I shouldn't be friends with a man that has romantic interests in me,

Hmmmm, that extreme!

Mrs. Eve:

. . . and I shouldn't be friends with a man that has romantic interests in me . .

Agree with him to an extent . . .cos he is a man and knows how we think.

what kinda play is a snake doing with a rat?

Shouldn't the husband trust the wife to know that she would not let that happen or let the guy cross that line?

Your Husband was a nice Guy someone else might kick you out the curb for that how dare can you bring another man to your house when your husband is away?  I don't care if he is friend cousin co worker etc in my culture is a no no and I 'm not that rigid

Eve, there's thing little thing called r.ape

remember some stories from Martin Lawrence's You so Crazy  . . silent, cool - looking but deranged men . . . .

Maybe he didn't make a big deal about it because he know what kind of wife he has and know that I would never cross that line. You have to trust your spouses if not what the point of marrying them?

It really is a sign of direspect but depending on certain conditions. let me use my experience as an example. In August 2009, I invited my ex-girl friend to Benin City, an she ask me to get her meat pie which I did but on my way back, she was with another guy. she did not tell me who the guy was but the way I saw them, I knew there was a connection between them, her ex. but what happened? the guy took her out before I could drop the meat pie and come back to the spot where I had left them. And this around 8 p.m. she did not come back until after 10. what can you make out of that?

That shows that she has no control. due to that and some other acts of hers, i had to end every thing.

Mrs. Eve:

One time a male friend of mine came to visit when my husband wasn't home and he was just a friend not an ex or anything. He have shared that he have taken interest in me but I was already involved and said he want to remain my friend. I didn't take it as an issue, my husband took it as an issue saying that no man should have been in the house where he wasn't there and I shouldn't be friends with a man that has romantic interests in me,

Hmmmm, that extreme!

My dear I support ur hubby! A man has a right to defend wats his gurl! Cos he knows wat men are like, comin up wit o I want to be ur friend wen all they want is to hit it. U best b careful too don't be letting no male friends in ur house wen hubby ain't around. Sure he can trust u but can he trust dem? n can u say for sure he ain't gonna try nothin funny?

2sexy:

It really is a sign of direspect but depending on certain conditions. let me use my experience as an example. In August 2009, I invited my ex-girl friend to Benin City, an she ask me to get her meat pie which I did but on my way back, she was with another guy. she did not tell me who the guy was but the way I saw them, I knew there was a connection between them, her ex. but what happened? the guy took her out before I could drop the meat pie and come back to the spot where I had left them. And this around 8 p.m. she did not come back until after 10. what can you make out of that?

That shows that she has no control. due to that and some other acts of hers, i had to end every thing.

Well, I am sorry to say but your ex was whorish and she did what whores do. There is a difference when you converse with your ex but to go out with them and act like yall couples is COMPLETELY BIG DIFFERENCE. IF she had respect for you she would have not went far as leaving the spot where you left them. I am sure it okay to talk to exes but to "date" them is suspectish! Well you did what you did but all FEMALES aren't like that and some actually respect their man!

Lord_Reed:

My dear I support your hubby! A man has a right to defend wats his gurl! Cos he knows wat men are like, comin up wit o I want to be your friend wen all they want is to hit it. U best b careful too don't be letting no male friends in your house wen hubby ain't around. Sure he can trust u but can he trust dem? n can u say for sure he ain't gonna try nothin funny?

I hear what you saying though, I don't let strange men in my house when my husband is not home but I guess I can't trust no man huh? My husband didn't trip but he let me know he don't want it to happen again. I am like who you think you is Negro? Hmmph!

hmmm, just the reason for my quarell with bf yesterday. You see, i am good friends with both of my exes, i mean really matured good friends, and between you and i, i wouldnt touch them romantically again with a ten foot pole, but ohhhhh, my bf just would not hear of it, i mean he said get them off your face book page, stop your jists on d phone, bla bla bla, and i am like dude, get a grip, guys r just pals withh girlfriends of their own, but he wouldnt listen, now he is bothered i am going to a mutual friends wedding, and my exx mightt be there. Either ways, i told him i can not pass my ex like he is a ghost, girrl is gonna say hi nicely, and walk away. We have agreed on that, but eish men relax, sometimes being a friend just means being a friend. I persomally do not care if he is friends with all his exes, well except one who still has her panties in a bunch for him, so yeah whatever.

Whenever i meet ma exes Ms Eve starves me and locks me outside the house