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My Kids Nanny Is Leaving - Urgent Advise - Family - Nairaland

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My Kids Nanny Is Leaving - Urgent Advise by omonikiba(f): 2:08am On Jan 06, 2020
This is so urgent now.

This woman is so nice to us, my kids love her and am heart broken she's leaving today.

I have being trying to manage her marriage, she has issues with the MIL and hubby, they don't want to see her around. Her husband wants to take her back to the village, we've done all our best, I knelt down with other elderly people to beg but the MIL insist she's rude and want her to leave.

I will really be hurt to see her go, who else can I trust my kids with? I leave my rooms open with no fear, she doesn't steal and obey all instructions to the letter. In fact, am soooo free with her around my kids.

I have two vacant rooms around, we don't mind housing her, my husband want her to stay with us but I said no, I thought about it carefully and so said no. My reasons are;

* I don't want to have issues with the MIL, we are both house owners, not just tenants that will depart sooner or latter so I don't want any issue with a fellow landlady.

* She is way older than me, I call her mama. So I hate to hurt an elderly person. Taking her DIL in will surely hurt her. And she might think so instigated the DIL against her.

* I don't want other landlords to see me as a bad person.

* What if something happens to this girl or what of if she starts to misbehave?

*My sister and older relations advise against it.

* Her MIL will do everything possible to tarnish my image in our estate.


This girl isn't a bad girl, she is this village girls that if you manage well, you'll get the best out of them but her MIL n hubby are phycos. Very difficult to be with. She's highly unforgiving. She insist this girl must go because she doesn't fit her status. But they saw the kind of person she is before marrying her.

Enough of too much talk.

What do I do to keep her without hurting her MIL.

If she leaves, the stress will be too much for me and I don't think I'll get someone else due to trust.

I need help.

Ignore my typos pls

11 Likes 1 Share

Re: My Kids Nanny Is Leaving - Urgent Advise by baby124: 3:43am On Jan 06, 2020
Who got the job for her? Did she come to you for the job herself or did MIL approach you for the job? You should not have gone begging psychos, it’s a waste of time, just wait for them to do their worst and stay out of it. Shebi their worst is that they don’t want her as wife anymore? Ok! But she is your employee. Her private business should not be your concern.

It’s strictly business and your kids come first. Ask her if she wants to go back to the village... if she doesn’t, try to rent her a room in another neighborhood where she will be coming to work from. If they ask you questions, tell them she came back by herself and she begged for her job back. Also, as it’s difficult to get help, your kids have refused to cooperate with anyone but her. So you had to rehire her. Besides you don’t want to get involved in her private affair. Shikena.

231 Likes 7 Shares

Re: My Kids Nanny Is Leaving - Urgent Advise by NwaAmaikpe: 3:49am On Jan 06, 2020
shocked




I was almost starting to think you were selfish about your decision to keep her but reading further it became clearer that you have a genuine bond with her, are empathetic to her plight and wants just the best for her.

But this is a very tricky issue and you would never know the lenght it will go when the tales are spurn in the neighborhood about how you housed a cast-away to spite her husband's people.
I will feel bad if I were her husband and even worse if I am her mother-in-law.

Life is easy.
This lady is extremely good to your kids and is a perfect fit in your house.
Your kids see her as family too.
Your husband is willing to house her despite knowing her husband is just a breadth away.

Most importantly, you see the good in her that not even her husband who married her and her mother-in-law who lives with her sees.
You apparently have concluded that this lady is indispensable to the life of your kids and the bliss of your family.

Hanty, there is only one way to keep her without hurting both yourself and her mother-in-law.
Just tell your husband to marry her, that way she will become you people's property and you will not feel so bad when your husband starts screwing her.

Because definitely, water must find it's level this one that Broda wants her sleeping under his roof.

Over to Lalast.iclala and the other elders.

111 Likes 5 Shares

Re: My Kids Nanny Is Leaving - Urgent Advise by Coldplay007(f): 4:05am On Jan 06, 2020
Its a simple decision.. who do you think requires your help and sympathy..
The Psycho MIL and Hubby, or the poor Village girl you have spoken so nicely about..
She is also a adult..you can rent a place for her in town..

22 Likes 3 Shares

Re: My Kids Nanny Is Leaving - Urgent Advise by PointZerom: 4:46am On Jan 06, 2020
I see you creating big problem for your family.
No human is irreplaceable on this planet. If you go ahead and accommodate this fellow you will regret it.

Just let her go and stop been emotional.

36 Likes 2 Shares

Re: My Kids Nanny Is Leaving - Urgent Advise by SmileDance(f): 4:58am On Jan 06, 2020
If you can afford accommodation for your nanny elsewhere without her mother in law knowing then it might help, she doesn't have to stop being your employee simply because she's divorcing her husband.

14 Likes 1 Share

Re: My Kids Nanny Is Leaving - Urgent Advise by iHart(m): 5:02am On Jan 06, 2020
MIL- Mother in-law
DIL - Daughter in-law

65 Likes 2 Shares

Re: My Kids Nanny Is Leaving - Urgent Advise by kodyx(f): 6:00am On Jan 06, 2020
Tell her to agree along with the plans of the MIL and hubby, when they might have taken her back home, she can always find her way back and by then you might have gotten her an alternative accomodation. It just for you to make the whole arrangements with her, that way those guys won't hold anything against you.

43 Likes 1 Share

Re: My Kids Nanny Is Leaving - Urgent Advise by SmileDance(f): 7:06am On Jan 06, 2020
kodyx:
Tell her to agree along with the plans of the MIL and hubby, when they might have taken her back home, she can always find her way back and by then you might have gotten her an alternative accomodation. It just for you to make the whole arrangements with her, that way those guys won't hold anything against you.
op listen to this advive

31 Likes 2 Shares

Re: My Kids Nanny Is Leaving - Urgent Advise by Amanee(f): 7:30am On Jan 06, 2020
Wasted my three seconds thinking you'll finally say something sensible, alas... undecided



NwaAmaikpe:
shocked




I was almost starting to think you were selfish about your decision to keep her but reading further it became clearer that you have a genuine bond with her, are empathetic to her plight and wants just the best for her.

But this is a very tricky issue and you would never know the lenght it will go when the tales are spurn in the neighborhood about how you housed a cast-away to spite her husband's people.
I will feel bad if I were her husband and even worse if I am her mother-in-law.

Life is easy.
This lady is extremely good to your kids and is a perfect fit in your house.
Your kids see her as family too.
Your husband is willing to house her despite knowing her husband is just a breadth away.

Most importantly, you see the good in her that not even her husband who married her and her mother-in-law who lives with her sees.
You apparently have concluded that this lady is indispensable to the life of your kids and the bliss of your family.

Hanty, there is only one way to keep her without hurting both yourself and her mother-in-law.
Just tell your husband to marry her, that way she will become you people's property and you will not feel so bad when your husband starts fvcking her.

Because definitely, water must find it's level.

Over to Lalasticlala and the other elders.

141 Likes 1 Share

Re: My Kids Nanny Is Leaving - Urgent Advise by hisexcellency34: 3:07pm On Jan 06, 2020
Let her leave. It may be difficult but you will get another one, even better. No human is indispensable. What if she dies?

3 Likes 1 Share

Re: My Kids Nanny Is Leaving - Urgent Advise by drizslim(m): 3:07pm On Jan 06, 2020
I only came to read comments

I don't intrude into family matters

3 Likes

Re: My Kids Nanny Is Leaving - Urgent Advise by Humphrizy(m): 3:07pm On Jan 06, 2020
In order not to bring in much worries..... Try and get yourself another nanny... From your story, One can deduce that you have good sense of humor and am not in support of you bringing her in permanently/temporarily to stay with you.... I no go give you that kinda advise.

You are a woman and she is a woman... Anything fit happen.

Naturally, some Ladies can't condone other ladies attitude.

So to be on a safer side.. Kindly check out another nanny.... I wish you all the best

3 Likes 1 Share

Re: My Kids Nanny Is Leaving - Urgent Advise by Nobody: 3:08pm On Jan 06, 2020
grin grin

Tough Decision

[Have you checked my signature TODAY
Re: My Kids Nanny Is Leaving - Urgent Advise by tityboi: 3:10pm On Jan 06, 2020
hmmmm
Re: My Kids Nanny Is Leaving - Urgent Advise by johnkay1(m): 3:10pm On Jan 06, 2020
Boki
Re: My Kids Nanny Is Leaving - Urgent Advise by Goodgod213: 3:10pm On Jan 06, 2020
Look for a job for her and find a single room for her that’s all finish

1 Like

Re: My Kids Nanny Is Leaving - Urgent Advise by DWJOBScom(m): 3:10pm On Jan 06, 2020
Thank God my mother will never ever do to this !!

#make I marry first sha
Re: My Kids Nanny Is Leaving - Urgent Advise by vincentjk(m): 3:11pm On Jan 06, 2020
Please what's MIL and DIL?

1 Like

Re: My Kids Nanny Is Leaving - Urgent Advise by A305: 3:11pm On Jan 06, 2020
To be honest I didn't read op's story but I know if her nanny is leave, she should let her leave. Hire a new one or take your kids to day care and get that CHEAP 09 corrolla on my page to make your morning runs easier.
Re: My Kids Nanny Is Leaving - Urgent Advise by oz4real83(m): 3:11pm On Jan 06, 2020
Assuming she gets a better job or an opportunity to improve her life through education, will u still insist she stays and continue being your nanny? Just learn to move on no matter how good she has been to your family. Don't create problems for yourself and family. If u love/like her so much, give her enough money as a pay-off from working for your family to enable her start a new life without her husband.

19 Likes

Re: My Kids Nanny Is Leaving - Urgent Advise by Neddstark: 3:11pm On Jan 06, 2020
omonikiba:
This is so urgent now.

This woman is so nice to us, my kids love her and am heart broken she's leaving today.

I have being trying to manage her marriage, she has issues with the MIL and hubby, they don't want to see her around. Her husband wants to take her back to the village, we've done all our best, I knelt down with other elderly people to beg but the MIL insist she's rude and want her to leave.

I will really be hurt to see her go, who else can I trust my kids with? I leave my rooms open with no fear, she doesn't steal and obey all instructions to the letter. In fact, am soooo free with her around my kids.

I have two vacant rooms around, we don't mind housing her, my husband want her to stay with us but I said no, I thought about it carefully and so said no. My reasons are;

* I don't want to have issues with the MIL, we are both house owners, not just tenants that will depart sooner or latter so I don't want any issue with a fellow landlady.

* She is way older than me, I call her mama. So I hate to hurt an elderly person. Taking her DIL in will surely hurt her. And she might think so instigated the DIL against her.

* I don't want other landlords to see me as a bad person.

* What if something happens to this girl or what of if she starts to misbehave?

*My sister and older relations advise against it.

* Her MIL will do everything possible to tarnish my image in our estate.


This girl isn't a bad girl, she is this village girls that if you manage well, you'll get the best out of them but her MIL n hubby are phycos. Very difficult to be with. She's highly unforgiving. She insist this girl must go because she doesn't fit her status. But they saw the kind of person she is before marrying her.

Enough of too much talk.

What do I do to keep her without hurting her MIL.

If she leaves, the stress will be too much for me and I don't think I'll get someone else due to trust.

I need help.

Ignore my typos pls




Your abbreviations bored me off

11 Likes

Re: My Kids Nanny Is Leaving - Urgent Advise by healthserve(m): 3:11pm On Jan 06, 2020
Stupeed woman
Re: My Kids Nanny Is Leaving - Urgent Advise by Nobody: 3:11pm On Jan 06, 2020
Parents, beware of this moniker, kaycee125 a pedophile.

#saynotochildmolestation

1 Like

Re: My Kids Nanny Is Leaving - Urgent Advise by GoodFaith: 3:12pm On Jan 06, 2020
baby124:
Who got the job for her? Did she come to you for the job herself or did MIL approach you for the job? You should not have gone begging psychos, it’s a waste of time, just wait for them to do their worst and stay out of it. Shebi their worst is that they don’t want her as wife anymore? Ok! But she is your employee. Her private business should not be your concern.

It’s strictly business and your kids come first. Ask her if she wants to go back to the village... if she doesn’t, try to rent her a room in another neighborhood where she will be coming to work from. If they ask you questions, tell them she came back by herself and she begged for her job back. Also, as it’s difficult to get help, your kids have refused to cooperate with anyone but her. So you had to rehire her. Besides you don’t want to get involved in her private affair. Shikena.

" Ask her if she wants to go back to the village... if she doesn’t, try to rent her a room in another neighborhood"
well said

3 Likes

Re: My Kids Nanny Is Leaving - Urgent Advise by Nobody: 3:12pm On Jan 06, 2020
I know someone that'll win your kid heart. she'll be like a 2.0 of the woman that left .. if you reside in lag.. you can get back at me
Re: My Kids Nanny Is Leaving - Urgent Advise by MariaAngeles: 3:12pm On Jan 06, 2020
Let her go.
Another good, or even better help will come.
You don't want to be caught in a family feud. Believe me, you can't handle it .

5 Likes

Re: My Kids Nanny Is Leaving - Urgent Advise by money121(m): 3:13pm On Jan 06, 2020
Ok
Re: My Kids Nanny Is Leaving - Urgent Advise by AfonjaBoston: 3:13pm On Jan 06, 2020
You are typical selfish, egocentric, proud, talkative, busybody and foolish naija woman who really don't care about her kids.

She is a good nanny liked by your kids but you are full of BULLCRAP about what her family will say about a nanny doing a good job.

She is not a criminal or ex-con so why would you be worried about what the neighbours or landlord association will say?

You are really foolish and If I was your husband na beating I go use reset your brain

1 Like

Re: My Kids Nanny Is Leaving - Urgent Advise by Amstupid(m): 3:14pm On Jan 06, 2020
NwaAmaikpe:
shocked




I was almost starting to think you were selfish about your decision to keep her but reading further it became clearer that you have a genuine bond with her, are empathetic to her plight and wants just the best for her.

But this is a very tricky issue and you would never know the lenght it will go when the tales are spurn in the neighborhood about how you housed a cast-away to spite her husband's people.
I will feel bad if I were her husband and even worse if I am her mother-in-law.

Life is easy.
This lady is extremely good to your kids and is a perfect fit in your house.
Your kids see her as family too.
Your husband is willing to house her despite knowing her husband is just a breadth away.

Most importantly, you see the good in her that not even her husband who married her and her mother-in-law who lives with her sees.
You apparently have concluded that this lady is indispensable to the life of your kids and the bliss of your family.

Hanty, there is only one way to keep her without hurting both yourself and her mother-in-law.
Just tell your husband to marry her, that way she will become you people's property and you will not feel so bad when your husband starts screwing her.

Because definitely, water must find it's level this one that Broda wants her sleeping under his roof.

Over to Lalast.iclala and the other elders.
no nid to blow grammer on u ,,, just want to say dis angry

18 Likes 2 Shares

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