Why are men so insenstive to the feelings of women?

I mean what is so hard about taking to time to understand what a woman is feeling and appeasing her needs? Whe she pours her heart out why take it for granted? Why the deception?

I know some women are "trifiling" and sorry but must all women suffer for what one has done to you?

->I'd appreciate serious answers! 190 & Mr. Cork  if you reply I am talking to you! (no oofiense!)

*Note: I am NOT calling anyone out! I am just remeniscing on a heart break that took place three years ago that I still cannot get over!

I want to buy two kilo of tomatto . . . . . .

^virgin!

Oh God,MzDarkSkin,who hurt u,u knw u are my very gud frnd,jst talk 2 me now ok.

MzDarkSkin:

^virgin!

Na u sabi . . . . .Sell me tomato jor

Babe believe me,you are not the only one wondering this,i've tried to find answers but it just seems like a waste of time.

@Battery to make a long story short, the guy who took my v-liscense three years ago, prior to that told me he is different, he loved me and etc. i find out the hard way not to trust men as three months after loosing my V-card to him, he bounced to the next prey! So I am crying at night and so forth and all of a sudden I see him a year later and he confesses he had a 2 year old son with another girl and that, he abandonded me because he thought it was best to go back to the baby's mother, MIND YOU we never technically broke up! He confessed to MULTIPLE LIES! this is AFTER he tells me he did a DNA test and it was not his child.

Now recently I see him on facebook and his "thought of the day" is saying "how can you get a girl to realise you love her when she dont know what love is!" now i am thinking i am glad that he is getting karma from some other chick but he has the nerve to ask that, not realizing HE HURT SOOOO MANY before hand. Now he, like most men, feel a little pain (the kid Dna incident to being ignored by someone he loves) and it's the end of the world for him? Are you kidding me? He told me took the virginity of 4 girls (i think it is more) all of which I am sure he left in the same way - in pain, and now he wants to moan?

I asked him "what about me?" he had me crying @ night for three years (i still do  ), and was in a relationship with another guy soon after who loved me and I couldnt appreciate because i was still heart broken, and when I bring it up to him it's like "oh well"? I don't get it!

so much for a short story eh? lol. sorry!

190:

SMH,

Walks away from thread!~

U beta do cuz am here o!

190:

SMH,

Walks away from thread!~

Get your azz back! i am serious!

Oh MzDarkSkin,am realy sory 4 dat ok,some guys can be heartles atimes. I gues d guy must 190's twin broda.

Mama gee ---

Heart matters really takes long to heal.@poster, sowwy, but you need to get your life on track, never let past events to weigh you down.

^Amen! Thank you.

@ battery Hey!  

yeah some guys can be very heartless, i really wish there were men who could actually defend this disgusting triat of theirs all they do is walk away (190 no pun intended!)  it's sickening to know someone can be ok after hurting someone.

MzDarkSkin:

^Amen! Thank you.

@ battery Hey!  

yeah some guys can be very heartless, i really wish there were men who could actually defend this disgusting triat of theirs all they do is walk away (190 no pun intended!)  it's sickening to know someone can be ok after hurting someone.

U knw i might surprise u?

Okay lets try to put some perspective into dis by playing devil's advocate. Now u know men are wired to think logical reason with our heads not hearts. Wen a man falls in love he usually throws logic to d wind (dats how u know he is). For d man who is not in it for the love the whole shebang is like a business deal if it works fine if it doesn't next partner please.

If u understand this about men den u will be a little more cautious in accept mere words as a token of love. Cos u ladies have a aweakness wen it comes to words. A sweet talking man always has ladies around him cos he makes em feel special by the influence of his words.

However a mans heart of love is not just only revealed in his words. He will ACT love if he truly is in love n not just infatuated or lusting.

I've gone this track cos I know there's no way to reverse time n stop ur heartbreak but mayb u can avoid any reoccurence. And for dat u are gonna have to break wit d past n believe u can find love. Just b wise n look for d signs.

@Lord_Reed absolutely! I guess what I am asking is, how do i decipher real love from deception if being a woman, i cannot tell genuine affection from physical game playing if you will. for example I love to cuddle, i love being affectionate, some men who are dogs let it be known from the "get go" 'listen i dont want a relationship/you are not my one and only' those guys dont bother me much because i know what is in store, but then there are ones like my ex who do hug, kiss, hold hands, and say i love you. its hard to tell the difference btn the real and fake! he just seemed too perfect i guess that was my first sign. is there a certain question or tactic/test one can use to enable them to know who is genuine and not? should i tell my current boo or any in the future "lets not have sex" to see if it is what they only want or is there another way to go about it?

with each passing day i am getting stronger and ready to move on, i just want to protect myself and other women from deception. this is not to bash men.

I understand MzDarkSkin so lets talk. Now I know it's easy to get carried away by d sweet nothings whispered n d laughter n d holding of hands n kissing n cuddling, very blinding stuff I know but u can know sincere genuine love how? U urself confessed u had some1 who loved u but ur head was to far in d past 2 appreciate it. How did u know? We can generally sense wen people care about us not for wat they can get but they seem to want to give us sometin most of d time.

Lemme ask u can u compare d affection ur ex showed u wit d affection of any of ur close relatives?

are women any different? or is this just a male bashing thread?

^^^^^ Just like I thot, another male basher!!! Why would I trust a woman when most of them are evil and just simply sluts ^

Scenario A - A guy meets a lady he loves. The lady does not reciprocate his love, or does but treats him in a shabby way and leaves him for a richer or more sophisticated dude. The guy becomes a hard nut case, and decides that all women are just like that. He doesn't trust or respect women cos of his experience and those around him. Can you blame him?   

Scenario B - A woman gets a similar heartbreak from a guy. |He leaves her for whatever reason he has come up with. In return, she treats her next guys like excreta. She believes that all men are not to be trusted. She might even believe that she should just use men for her physical and material gratification. How is the guy and the lady any different from each other? If you want to understand why men are so insensitive, you first hv to understand or come up with the reason, women are so insenstive to the feelings of men.

Thank you for the post MzDarkSkin, im looking forward to read some of the guys answer's. Very interesting.

^No problem!

@deniyor: Scenario A, i CAN blame him because if it took ONE woman's deception to make him hate women in general, then his issue is not about love. He may have a rejection issue. Unlike myself where this has happened to me more than once because of my willingness to find love by any means. . .naive of me but a reality, and through out all of that I am still willing to waiger that there are good men out there for me.

Scenario B, women are becoming a product of "their environment" so to speak. It has become a bit of an accepted culture for women to endure bull while men fly free. This is why a woman who sleeps with 5 men is regarded low class compared to a man who deflowered 12. It is this male over female dominance that now has women fed up. Some women are not yet willing to let go and others are ready to get even by any means but as a woman I know they are fooling themselves because no matter how much they mistreat men, they are crying when nobody is watching. Women cheat/ act out on emotion, men on impulse.If you take the time to analyze NL arguments btn men and women you see the difference. A man will say his piece and be willing to walk away, but the women go on and on and on. A man can insult the woman and move to the next topic, the woman will either follow him or be on edge with any man who she feels is reminiscent of him.

@Lord_Reed My two exes differed because the trifling one used his affections to woo me in for his convenience. My well being was not cared for unless he was around me; no calls unless he wanted to hang out. A lot of us women use the fact that "he took my virginity" as a reason to play the fool for a man, and men know this. My ex after him and I broke up due to differences but he was more genuine in that he showed me affection whether he was happy or upset with me: sending flowers, candy, calling me every day, taking me on trips, making sure I was ok. He was even willing to allow me to vent about the other guy and gave me his view points. He was like my relatives because not only did my family embrace him but he showed me the same unconditional love they did. But my heart was with the loser and i viewed my relationship as just a friendship just taking up the time until the first guy would come back to me.

Although the first guy did come back to me and I did get "revenge" lol i still felt incomplete because not only did i let myself down and disobey my mothers wishes by not treating my V.ginity/body/mind/soul as something special, i went through a whole ordeal to be "grown" and then i hurt someone just like I was hurt (although he too turned out to be a bit of a deuchbag at times which is another reason we broke up).

I made a vow to forgive the loser and myself and to move on with life and I plan to. I have not given up on men and love I just want to equip myself with enough common sense to protect my heart. Men dont understand how devastating something as small as having sex with a girl, and not calling for even hours regardless if they have intentions to be with her let alone weeks/months at a time. it is better for a man to be like that without sexual intercourse but once that comes to play and the "i love yous" ,you essentially are killing someone inside when the declaration/promise is empty! This is not just an issue of "puppy love" a lot of men unchecked when young, grow and have families with women and still are eager to run else where. It is unbareable!

i ll giv u directions. Playaz are d best lovas becos they 2 are lukin 4 lv and are alwayz whining in d bathrum. Try datin a playa and hey quit cryin ova losers, they aint worth it. My two centz

Passing. . . . .

MzDarksin. . .I think I have a lot of perspective on this issue but I tell you one thing:

In most cases, the girl who is truly loved by a certain guy actually or will very soon love some other guy. A guy who is truly loved by a girl will most like be longing for another girl. It takes only ONE bad experience for most guys (way more than 50%) to turn from "good" to "bad" and after that, the ladies he dates until he is ready to be married will most likely continually pay for the "sins" of the first girl. That is why a lot of guys can switch to their head almost readily and though there may be ephemeral tender thoughts towards his current lady when she is around or during conversations, generally, he can run the "relationship" literally with his head and not his heart.

BTW, does losing the V-license to a guy really make a girl continually and helplessly attracted to the guy? Just assume this is not a bad or evil person, say just arguments and disagreements, does the V thing always make most women to want the guy who took their V??

@mzdarkskin
Both man and woman reacted the same way to the same problem but you found fault with the man and wrote the woman was a victim of her circumstances and environment. Talk about being totally biased. You think men don't go thru the same heartbreak over and over with women? You think a man isn't trying to find love too? The first time I fell in love with a lady, she cheated on me countless times while making me feel worthless. The next one after that had a guy on the side . Couple of them were quite free givers, or materialistic etc. What makes you think I wasn't looking for true love then.

Most of us prefer to look for the solution to our problem within others when we just hv to really loook inward. If you find it hard to keep a man, just ask yourself "what is it about me that can't make a man wanna stick around?"

MzDarkSkin glad to know u've reasoned out some of the issues. Is there anything else u can't wrap ur head around?