Mizwisdom:
Can someone help to clarify this issue for me, how can somebody in his right senses prefer to be a Boss to his wife than a friend and companion? I feel such a person is not well upstairs. Many men these days will keep reminding women that they are the Boss, why should I marry my Boss for God sake? that's the last person on earth that I would want to share my life with but I would marry my friend any day. OP, lower your pride, stop being bossy, you're using your hand to destroy your marriage, your wife is resisting because she's a human being and she wants to be treated as such. It's only a desperate lady or a villager that will allow you to manipulate and boss her like you're doing but after a while the woman will still find a way of dealing with you if you continue your bossiness. Stop it, be a friend and companion to her, listen when she talks and share your life with her. If you're nice to her, she will submit willingly, good luck

cococandy:
Your marriage won’t work until you drop the boss mentality and treat her like your partner.
You won’t “allow” her make decisions in your marriage. You insisted the wedding be at your own time instead of coming to a compromise.


In my opinion, you are the primary problem and your next marriage if you divorce from this one is likely to have issues too.

Kekereekun123:
the problem is the guy, she say she no wan marry now. you say na by force.

manontree:


Shocking coming from you. Your views have always been a bit more balanced than this

The bossy claim has no grounds. An unproven allegation which can clearly be analysed to be false. He stated she is rude and even her parents are against her. Her messages paints a picture of a woman that disrespects her husband

This is a man that has assisted this illiterate through school. If the claim that she pushed up the wedding bill to N3m is true doesn't this show a woman that is manipulate? Doesn't it show a woman that was scheming to ensure he balks and doesn't go through the wedding on account of the high cost?? Which same bride attempts to delete her fiance's purse if she planned living with him after the wedding

If he is bossy would he have obeyed her and paid for the high cost society wedding given his low income industry as a medical professional. N3m for a wedding is still extreme for a doctor in nigeria

She has someone else and all these claims is an attempt to shake tables and bail

Shugavee:
lol like it or not,, our weapon is our mouth !! If u not ready to get used to that fact ,, just know u are not ready to hv a woman under ur roof!!

Mizwisdom:
Can someone help to clarify this issue for me, how can somebody in his right senses prefer to be a Boss to his wife than a friend and companion? I feel such a person is not well upstairs. Many men these days will keep reminding women that they are the Boss, why should I marry my Boss for God sake? that's the last person on earth that I would want to share my life with but I would marry my friend any day. OP, lower your pride, stop being bossy, you're using your hand to destroy your marriage, your wife is resisting because she's a human being and she wants to be treated as such. It's only a desperate lady or a villager that will allow you to manipulate and boss her like you're doing but after a while the woman will still find a way of dealing with you if you continue your bossiness. Stop it, be a friend and companion to her, listen when she talks and share your life with her. If you're nice to her, she will submit willingly, good luck

Sorry to say this.. You sounded just like the woman in the text.. Hope you are not the wife. No offence pls.. My comment is below.

openmine:

Please speak for your self!
This unproven,outdated and preposterous narrative is not true for ALL women!
If that's your attitude,then that's your attitude...don't conclude every woman will behave like you!

Shugavee:
because she’s quite no mean say she no get mouth,, don’t take it personal,, when a woman uses her mouth on u , u gonna feel hurt!! Especially cause of male ego!! So chill.

openmine:

i still insist that not everyone is like you esp the female gender.....i have seen and related with so many ladies in my life...some with questionable characters and others with excellence in emotional maturity!
Stop making an excuse for your flaws through gender generalization!
.....and besides,there is no character flaw that can not be controlled esp the power of the tongue!
If you believe that's the way you are and you can never change,then that is your problem and cross to bear in future but it will be absurd to use your attitude to generalize every female....
The biggest mistake you are making is thinking that every lady's attitude is similar or exactly like yours!

Shugavee:
u win, u are correct.

openmine:

Its not a matter of winning....i am only being factual!

Shugavee:
kudos

hybrid77:
Pls i need a sincere advice here.

Im 3 months old in marriage and im so unhappy about the set up (my wife too)

My wife is a student and she tried everything to shift the marriage until easter this year but i refused due to many projects for the year. so we got married 3 months ago.

I took care of her bills since she got admission and we dated for 5 years

But she is so disrespectful and want to make important decisions in marriage which ive refused to allow.

Now, she claims i forced her into marriage and she is not mentally ready because i asked her to change to my family's name.

She has been good then bad then worse..And i think her words about forcing her into marriage has irreparably hurt me.

I spent over 3m of my cash to give her the wedding she wanted (Without any support from her family) against my wish for a 1m wedding.

And despite getting the big wedding she wants before consenting to marry last year, she claims she is not mentally ready and was forced into marriage.

she has repeated this over and over and its making me go crazy..in fact im tired already

Right now she wants more time to be a wife..but im beginning to feel there is a love issue here..I feel she does not love me as she always claims

Though weve settled but we dont talk as usual..we dont even want to hear from each other...

it seems i nolonger love her like i used to..And worst still, continuing with the marriage when she claims she was forced is degrading and disreputable.

My question is, at what point should anyone seriously consider a divorce?

StarUp:
She has seen something better somewhere...

Tonyfx:
To be honest with you, you are the one at fault from your write up and the screenshots.
First marriage nor be house when you go rush enter because you don dey build an for 5years, if you rush enter marriage you go rush commot from am.
Secondly marriage is a lifetime journey and so it requires alot of patience and understanding between both parties. Your wife told you she wasn't mentally ready but you didn't want to see things from her point of view. Nor be so Bros (it takes two to tangle).
As for the decision part remember say na your life partner even as Dangote get money reach he cannot make any decisions about his own company without the agreement of his partners which are his board of directors. See things from her point of view and let her see from yours then both of you should come to a peaceful conclusion. The marriage too early for quarrel na.
As for divorce I won't support that instead why not give her time to adjust and be in the right frame of mind. Things will definitely workout because she isn't asking for a divorce.
Give her time and try to be supportive of her. I hope you will find something useful here.

Randy100:
Divorce is the surest thing now but since you don waste all your money on her get her pregnant so that you don't loose too much.

sconp:
@hybrid77

Out of curiosity, what step did you finally take? Where did it all end?

hybrid77:


Lol..we have been fine all these while..My wife had a baby boy last year and everything has been to sweet to be honest...

I dated my wife for 5 years before marriage and to be frank our disagreement were all because of my expenses during the wedding

She wanted an expensive marriage whicch didnt make sense to me at that time because i was building a hospital

So, as she didnt bend..i gues i went over board with trying to force everything on her...

She wasnt a bad person but her selfishness at that time resulted in my terrible and childish actions

All i did was to just give her some space, and everything seemed to have worked out perfectly for us..

I guess what i learned was to let bygones be bygones and forgive as early as possible...

The 2 weeks or so we had issues i was busy sleeping aroind with my EXs, partying and looking for ways to get down from my "man's pride"..

My actions were shameful and disgusting considering i wasn't married for more than 2 month...

Since then, we've been perfect for each other and marriage has been the best thing to have happened in our lives...

Thanks for asking...

hybrid77:


Lol..we have been fine all these while..My wife had a baby boy last year and everything has been to sweet to be honest...

I dated my wife for 5 years before marriage and to be frank our disagreement were all because of my expenses during the wedding

She wanted an expensive marriage whicch didnt make sense to me at that time because i was building a hospital

So, as she didnt bend..i gues i went over board with trying to force everything on her...

She wasnt a bad person but her selfishness at that time resulted in my terrible and childish actions

All i did was to just give her some space, and everything seemed to have worked out perfectly for us..

I guess what i learned was to let bygones be bygones and forgive as early as possible...

The 2 weeks or so we had issues i was busy sleeping aroind with my EXs, partying and looking for ways to get down from my "man's pride"..

My actions were shameful and disgusting considering i wasn't married for more than 2 month...

Since then, we've been perfect for each other and marriage has been the best thing to have happened in our lives...

Thanks for asking...

Kebbiprince:

Good one. But imagine sleeping around with your exes just few months after marriage meaning you had those side girls while dating her. Any day she cheats on you don't just get offended as you have already taken the lead. I don't see why we should stress ourselves to marry when we can't keep to one person. Tueh!

hybrid77:


Lol...we've moved on from here...Im not that man anymore..My comments were just to make people learn from my mistakes..

When you dont solve issues quickly, it coild easily explode into something else..

As i previously mentioned, cheating is a shameful act and i fully regret my actions...

Have a great day..My wife and I are reading your comments here as part of our low key celebrations for chelsea champions league qualification..you can join us..

bepositive11:


You're very wicked to suggest that