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Im Thinking Of Divorce Just Few Months Into Marriage - Romance (6) - Nairaland

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Re: Im Thinking Of Divorce Just Few Months Into Marriage by ekumagab(m): 4:22pm On Feb 02, 2020
It has not gotten to the point of divorce. All you require is to sit her down and talk sense into her, or give the space she requested for while watching her from the rare. May be she does not want to get pregnant now she is in school and your aim of bringing the marriage forward was to at least have a Baby before she graduates and then NYSC considering what you have put into the relationship.
1. Do not rush her, because you still have a long way in the marriage.
2. Respect her opinion and pet her more because she is now your wife and not just your girlfriend.
3. You should continue dating her in the marriage so that she will not feel as if you rushed her.
4. Also work on your self not complain about your family matters to people but to your God.
5. Am setting you will enjoy your marriage, because you took the right decision.

1 Like

Re: Im Thinking Of Divorce Just Few Months Into Marriage by Sundaycomputer: 4:23pm On Feb 02, 2020
She have one poor boyfriend somewhere, fucking her well

1 Like

Re: Im Thinking Of Divorce Just Few Months Into Marriage by Coolcalmcollect(m): 4:23pm On Feb 02, 2020
all you weak and dull men will have sense by force, you paid her school fees when she's not an orphan, she pretended to love you but her plan to leave you before marriage failed cos you obviously rushed to Wed her, you thinking you've won lol, den came the shocker.....nice men una go get sense one day.....never raise a female child for her dad cos of marriage una no dey hear word...

6 Likes

Re: Im Thinking Of Divorce Just Few Months Into Marriage by bukatyne(f): 4:23pm On Feb 02, 2020
hybrid77:
Pls i need a sincere advice here.

Im 3 months old in marriage and im so unhappy about the set up (my wife too)

My wife is a student and she tried everything to shift the marriage until easter this year but i refused due to many projects for the year. so we got married 3 months ago.

I took care of her bills since she got admission and we dated for 5 years

But she is so disrespectful and want to make important decisions in marriage which ive refused to allow.

Now, she claims i forced her into marriage and she is not mentally ready because i asked her to change to my family's name.

She has been good then bad then worse..And i think her words about forcing her into marriage has irreparably hurt me.

I spent over 3m of my cash to give her the wedding she wanted (Without any support from her family) against my wish for a 1m wedding.

And despite getting the big wedding she wants before consenting to marry last year, she claims she is not mentally ready and was forced into marriage.

she has repeated this over and over and its making me go crazy..in fact im tired already

Right now she wants more time to be a wife..but im beginning to feel there is a love issue here..I feel she does not love me as she always claims

Though weve settled but we dont talk as usual..we dont even want to hear from each other...

it seems i nolonger love her like i used to..And worst still, continuing with the marriage when she claims she was forced is degrading and disreputable.

My question is, at what point should anyone seriously consider a divorce?

Your wife's words:

You think it is only a woman needs, she also needs a companion and not a boss today, friend tomorrow:

Your words:

Your wife wants to take important decisions which you do not let her.

I think we can both agree that you are bossy and don allow your wife take/have input in decision making.

Question:

1. Can you give us examples of the decisions?

2. Is there any reason you do not let her have input in decision making?

3 Likes

Re: Im Thinking Of Divorce Just Few Months Into Marriage by Style007(m): 4:24pm On Feb 02, 2020
I see a very difficult and authoritative man who thinks you own a woman because you married her. Your wife is not the problem but you.

Work on yourself or free the lady to cool her head off. She boldly said it that you don’t treat her like a wife rather like her boss.

4 Likes

Re: Im Thinking Of Divorce Just Few Months Into Marriage by PapaAdanna: 4:25pm On Feb 02, 2020
hybrid77:
Pls i need a sincere advice here.

Im 3 months old in marriage and im so unhappy about the set up (my wife too)

My wife is a student and she tried everything to shift the marriage until easter this year but i refused due to many projects for the year. so we got married 3 months ago.

I took care of her bills since she got admission and we dated for 5 years

But she is so disrespectful and want to make important decisions in marriage which ive refused to allow.

Now, she claims i forced her into marriage and she is not mentally ready because i asked her to change to my family's name.

She has been good then bad then worse..And i think her words about forcing her into marriage has irreparably hurt me.

I spent over 3m of my cash to give her the wedding she wanted (Without any support from her family) against my wish for a 1m wedding.
Oga you invested on wedding not in marriage, get ur facts right.

And despite getting the big wedding she wants before consenting to marry last year, she claims she is not mentally ready and was forced into marriage.

she has repeated this over and over and its making me go crazy..in fact im tired already

Right now she wants more time to be a wife..but im beginning to feel there is a love issue here..I feel she does not love me as she always claims

Though weve settled but we dont talk as usual..we dont even want to hear from each other...

it seems i nolonger love her like i used to..And worst still, continuing with the marriage when she claims she was forced is degrading and disreputable.

My question is, at what point should anyone seriously consider a divorce?
Re: Im Thinking Of Divorce Just Few Months Into Marriage by Reigning2020: 4:26pm On Feb 02, 2020
the lady is not really to be blamed in this situation, it's clear you force her into the marriage but some pipu might counter n ask if he put a gun to her head but the truth is not every one can remain firm when being pressure into doing something even if its against everything they stand for also I feel OP feels some sort of entitlement because you help some one does not necessarily mean they will be the one to pay you back it does look like the lady really love you though you should not have pressured her into marriage it is better to be single and happy than married and be miserable its best you both go your separate way now when there is no child involve

3 Likes

Re: Im Thinking Of Divorce Just Few Months Into Marriage by PapaAdanna: 4:27pm On Feb 02, 2020
hybrid77:
Pls i need a sincere advice here.

Im 3 months old in marriage and im so unhappy about the set up (my wife too)

My wife is a student and she tried everything to shift the marriage until easter this year but i refused due to many projects for the year. so we got married 3 months ago.

I took care of her bills since she got admission and we dated for 5 years

But she is so disrespectful and want to make important decisions in marriage which ive refused to allow.

Now, she claims i forced her into marriage and she is not mentally ready because i asked her to change to my family's name.

She has been good then bad then worse..And i think her words about forcing her into marriage has irreparably hurt me.

I spent over 3m of my cash to give her the wedding she wanted (Without any support from her family) against my wish for a 1m wedding.
Oga you invested on wedding not in marriage, get ur facts right.

And despite getting the big wedding she wants before consenting to marry last year, she claims she is not mentally ready and was forced into marriage.

she has repeated this over and over and its making me go crazy..in fact im tired already

Right now she wants more time to be a wife..but im beginning to feel there is a love issue here..I feel she does not love me as she always claims

Though weve settled but we dont talk as usual..we dont even want to hear from each other...

it seems i nolonger love her like i used to..And worst still, continuing with the marriage when she claims she was forced is degrading and disreputable.

My question is, at what point should anyone seriously consider a divorce?
U invested in wedding not marriage.
In ur words "I spent over 3m of my cash to give her the wedding she wanted" .
Now it's time to give her the marriage she would enjoy.

1 Like

Re: Im Thinking Of Divorce Just Few Months Into Marriage by Amumaigwe: 4:27pm On Feb 02, 2020
Punchline33:
Bros just take it easy. When young girls who are not working grt married they usually misbehave. Just go soft on her for now, then get her pregnant as fast as possible, pamper her more till she gives birth. After the first child don't give her much space let her a second. Then you can relax and see how she will listen when you talk. You have money, but native intelligence is what you lack. Until she gives you a child your investment will be a waste. Even if you divorce now and marry again you will face the same problems so don't think it will be better with another young woman, they have a lot in common. Just be patient and pamper her, you will laugh at last.

Abeg, wisdom go kill this man. OP digeet these words of wisdom and act without delay.
Re: Im Thinking Of Divorce Just Few Months Into Marriage by FRANKOSKI(m): 4:28pm On Feb 02, 2020
NOW MONEY CANT SOLVE THIS
YOU SATARTED WITH MONEY SHOW AND SPLURGE.
BREAK EVEN �
Re: Im Thinking Of Divorce Just Few Months Into Marriage by Ustec: 4:28pm On Feb 02, 2020
hybrid77:
Pls i need a sincere advice here.

Im 3 months old in marriage and im so unhappy about the set up (my wife too)

My wife is a student and she tried everything to shift the marriage until easter this year but i refused due to many projects for the year. so we got married 3 months ago.

I took care of her bills since she got admission and we dated for 5 years

But she is so disrespectful and want to make important decisions in marriage which ive refused to allow.

Now, she claims i forced her into marriage and she is not mentally ready because i asked her to change to my family's name.

She has been good then bad then worse..And i think her words about forcing her into marriage has irreparably hurt me.

I spent over 3m of my cash to give her the wedding she wanted (Without any support from her family) against my wish for a 1m wedding.

And despite getting the big wedding she wants before consenting to marry last year, she claims she is not mentally ready and was forced into marriage.

she has repeated this over and over and its making me go crazy..in fact im tired already

Right now she wants more time to be a wife..but im beginning to feel there is a love issue here..I feel she does not love me as she always claims

Though weve settled but we dont talk as usual..we dont even want to hear from each other...

it seems i nolonger love her like i used to..And worst still, continuing with the marriage when she claims she was forced is degrading and disreputable.

My question is, at what point should anyone seriously consider a divorce?
Bros,
Divorce her if that's what she want.
Tell her you will giver her a month to reconsider her decision, else,you will get yourself another wife.
As a man,you're the head and in charge,
She can't control you on top your own money na,
You're the boss.
Re: Im Thinking Of Divorce Just Few Months Into Marriage by 12345baba(m): 4:28pm On Feb 02, 2020
Petyprincess:
The truth is your wife doesn't love you no more or never loved you!! Moreover why did you forced her into marriage with you? That's where the problem started.Nw the best way is to go your separate ways since the marriage is even early nd she's already gotten fed up with you,nw that you have no kids you still can still divorce nd let her continue her single life since that's what she always wanted!! If you dnt divorce she will keep on blaming you for forcing her into marriage when she wasn't ready.Its better divorcing that getting stalked in marriage that love isnt mutual!!
what of his 3 million? Nna eh she must marry o. If am the guy I will turn her to after one before we separate ie she must born one pikin for me before she go. Thats the Compensation for my 3 milla
Re: Im Thinking Of Divorce Just Few Months Into Marriage by dingbang(m): 4:29pm On Feb 02, 2020
Omo that 3million na big money o. You better be patient with her because you cannot come and waste 3million just like that. That marriage must work in Jesus name!
Re: Im Thinking Of Divorce Just Few Months Into Marriage by TheRedpillguy: 4:29pm On Feb 02, 2020
Hehehe, and the Redpillguy is the bad guy. The first mistake you did. You got married. The girl want to be free so that she can fvck all the dicks before settling wen she is old and irrelivent. This is regular feminist strategy. The name part is feminist thing. Anyways cut your loses now, just capitalized on what she said and go now. Or she will get a lawyer and take all of your money. Then again serves you right.

3 Likes

Re: Im Thinking Of Divorce Just Few Months Into Marriage by TanyLoe(f): 4:30pm On Feb 02, 2020
hybrid77:
Pls i need a sincere advice here.

Im 3 months old in marriage and im so unhappy about the set up (my wife too)

My wife is a student and she tried everything to shift the marriage until easter this year but i refused due to many projects for the year. so we got married 3 months ago.

I took care of her bills since she got admission and we dated for 5 years

But she is so disrespectful and want to make important decisions in marriage which ive refused to allow.

Now, she claims i forced her into marriage and she is not mentally ready because i asked her to change to my family's name.

She has been good then bad then worse..And i think her words about forcing her into marriage has irreparably hurt me.

I spent over 3m of my cash to give her the wedding she wanted (Without any support from her family) against my wish for a 1m wedding.

And despite getting the big wedding she wants before consenting to marry last year, she claims she is not mentally ready and was forced into marriage.

she has repeated this over and over and its making me go crazy..in fact im tired already

Right now she wants more time to be a wife..but im beginning to feel there is a love issue here..I feel she does not love me as she always claims

Though weve settled but we dont talk as usual..we dont even want to hear from each other...

it seems i nolonger love her like i used to..And worst still, continuing with the marriage when she claims she was forced is degrading and disreputable.

My question is, at what point should anyone seriously consider a divorce?



3m?
Re: Im Thinking Of Divorce Just Few Months Into Marriage by mendula(m): 4:31pm On Feb 02, 2020
my guy sit your wife down and talk things out....... it's too early to walk out of your marriage, they ain't any perfect wife or husband any where....understanding is the key bro

1 Like

Re: Im Thinking Of Divorce Just Few Months Into Marriage by ghettochild4u(m): 4:31pm On Feb 02, 2020
So u sponsored a girl thru school and u expect her to love u.....??
Anyways u make mistake sha o..
U no dey see post of people funding women's education and then after graduation she wants to marry someone else..
I blame u sha....
U saw the signs yet u still force her marry cos u feel u Don too invest in her..
Mr oga end d marriage
No be by force o

1 Like

Re: Im Thinking Of Divorce Just Few Months Into Marriage by Duru009(m): 4:31pm On Feb 02, 2020
Nothing like giving your marriage time ......

The handwriting is already on the wall.....


Separate now or divorce now, she doesn't love you at all from the onset. She only use you to get the little things she got. She is young and wants to explore.

A Consin of my has almost thesame experience a year ago....

He is better of now....

Be wise !

2 Likes

Re: Im Thinking Of Divorce Just Few Months Into Marriage by APOSTLECHUMA: 4:34pm On Feb 02, 2020
THERE IS NO ROOM FOR DIVORCE IN THE BIBLE NO, NOT EVEN FOR ADULTERY, EXCEPT FOR THE CAUSE OF FORNICATION. DEVIL SIMPLY ENTERED INTO THE MARRIAGE TO WRECK IT AND TO OVERCOME, YOU SHOULD PRAY, LOVE HER THE WAY U USED TO DESPITE ALL HER FAULTS AND DISOBEDIENCE ETC AND ALWAYS CARRY HER ALONG WHILE TAKING VITAL FAMILY DECISIONS. THEY DONT LIKE BEING EXCLUDED AND IT IS IMPORTANT U REALISE THAT GOD DIDNT CREATE HER A HEP-MATE, BUT AN HELP-MATE UNTO YOU. IF YOU BE ABLE TO UNDERSTAND THE DIFFERENCE B/W THE TWO, YOU WILL START CARRYING HER ALONG IN ALL THAT U DO AND YOU WILL SEE HER CHANGE.

1 Like

Re: Im Thinking Of Divorce Just Few Months Into Marriage by fineboynl(m): 4:35pm On Feb 02, 2020
It baffles me that guys still spend or waste monies on marriages. When you can simply have a baby mama for free.

Disparate people always fall for this type of shit

I have learnt my lesson not to spend a dime for wedding shit. Court wedding straight or baby mama.

I guess you are Ibo. It's in their blood

2 Likes

Re: Im Thinking Of Divorce Just Few Months Into Marriage by Mursz: 4:36pm On Feb 02, 2020
She’s tired. Why did you force her into marriage in the first place?

That was wrong move number 1, wrong move number 2 is asking her to change for you, while you were courting you should have studied her to know her kind of person, and wrong move number 3 is consenting to a break. Your 3m wedding is not the point, no one dipped their hands into your pocket to spend that much.

DO NOT BUY A WOMAN WITH MONEY! E no dey work!!!! If she no love you she no love you.

If you take that break consider the marriage over, better start looking for a divorce lawyer.

3 months in marriage and you are already having problems.

I pray thee wisdom in your next decision.

2 Likes

Re: Im Thinking Of Divorce Just Few Months Into Marriage by Howmon: 4:36pm On Feb 02, 2020
Men should recognize if a woman don't love them, marriage is not going to keep her, not even money can keep her, learn to face reality guys, some ladies are out of reach, even if you use money to keep them down, the day they get a richer guy or you lose your wealth is the day you lose them.

3 Likes 1 Share

Re: Im Thinking Of Divorce Just Few Months Into Marriage by juman(m): 4:36pm On Feb 02, 2020
lexy2014:


D guys marriage is a done deal. Its dead. All this grammar won't change anything. It will only make things worse. No man can live with a scorned woman.

Its small problem o. It can be settled easily.
They are learning to live a life of being married.

If you look around there are bigger problems in some families and they resolve them.

There are husbands that still stayed with their wives who cheated on them and have two or more bastard children. Confirmed bastard after DNA tests.
Re: Im Thinking Of Divorce Just Few Months Into Marriage by Jonathan39: 4:39pm On Feb 02, 2020
100% correct, there is somebody she is not tired of sleeping with, all she is giving is cheap excuse. Is either the op allow her to go or she will definitely cheat
Acme45:
she wants to enjoy her school boyfriend as her friends 're doing now in school.I work in the school environment and i see what is happening@ nights, so since you tied the knots it's like putting her in bondage.so she can't enjoy the night life with her friends.Guy let her go or else you will never enjoy the marriage because she will cheat on you,because she is already showing you the signs so pls just let her go.God will compensate you big time
Re: Im Thinking Of Divorce Just Few Months Into Marriage by Misscongenialit: 4:40pm On Feb 02, 2020
abbey621:


Sorry but your advice is like seeing smoke coming from your house and laughing, saying it's only smoke and not fire....lol. The best thing this guy can do is to dissolve the marriage quickly and move on, it is clear the girl is not ready for marriage but the bigger issue here is that she has no RESPECT for her husband or her mother. Such a girl cannot make a good wife, cannot make a good partner, cannot be trusted to raise good kids and most certainly is not worth the energy and sanity of a good man!

Let's not rush into hasty conclusions, like I mentioned it could be immaturity or her just being foolish. But time tells everything , that's why he needs to be patient and work with time. She could also be pulling the strings of manipulation and taking advantage of his love . So he has to be wise and give her what she asks for . I f she takes it good for both still early for them, if she changes still good for both for better understanding than one sided love.If they must move forward it has to be both and together
Re: Im Thinking Of Divorce Just Few Months Into Marriage by nkezecheckport: 4:41pm On Feb 02, 2020
I strongly believe you home can be remedied.
1. Delete every thought of entitlement you have; from your write up and hers its obvious that you feel entitled to always have your ways because of your investment in her thought her education and wedding. While its feels right to feel entitled given your investment , its wrong to flaunt it to your wifes face all the time. It belittles her, it gives her complex. Right now i believe she thinks she wants someone who will not feel be owns her who they can have a simple chat as friends and partners.

1 Like

Re: Im Thinking Of Divorce Just Few Months Into Marriage by Ooye12: 4:42pm On Feb 02, 2020
Boss don’t waste your time , your woman isn’t interested anymore ...she only love you when you are dating just cos you spend for her ....nothing like force into marriage both of you agree to be together ...

1 Like

Re: Im Thinking Of Divorce Just Few Months Into Marriage by Neoteny(m): 4:42pm On Feb 02, 2020
It's safe to conclude you're at fault, because you sound more concerned about your power and reputation than having a lover and friend.

I think she should immediately leave you and walk away.

4 Likes

Re: Im Thinking Of Divorce Just Few Months Into Marriage by TTMEG2: 4:49pm On Feb 02, 2020
Dude because of you i had to reactivate my over 6 years dormant nairaland account, now let's analyse your post (focusing on the claims & points referenced by you). I AM PUTTING MY RESPONSES IN BOLD AND AFTER //

My wife is a student and she tried everything to shift the marriage until easter this year but i refused due to many projects for the year. so we got married 3 months ago. --------------//DID YOU HONESTLY TRY TO UNDERSTAND WHY SHE WAS ASKING FOR A SHIFT OF DATE TO EASTER, I GUESS YOU JUST FORCED YOUR WAY INTO IT.

I took care of her bills since she got admission and we dated for 5 years --------- //A LOT OF MEN DO THAT, IT SHOULDN'T BE A TOPIC OR REFERENCE SINCE U DID IT VOLUNTARILY. GOD WOULD WANT US TO DO EVEN MORE AND TO THOSE THAT CANT REWARD US, IT MAY BE A GROUND YOU ARE STANDING ON AND DEMANDING SHE BECOMES SUBJECT TO YOU. .I THINK ITS WRONG

But she is so disrespectful and want to make important decisions in marriage which ive refused to allow.// MARRIAGE IS PARTNERSHIP< YOU HAVE FAILED TO UNDERSTAND SHE IS A HUMAN BEING WITH A VOICE AND MIND OF HER OWN. PUT YOURSELF IN HER SHOES, WOULDNT YOU WANT TO CONTRIBUTE TO IMPORATANT DECISIONS IN YOUR HUSBANDS HOME. CALM DOWN BRO AND BE MORE IN PARTNERSHIP, YOU WILL BE SUPRISED HOW HER OPINIONS WILL BE SAVING U A LOT OF $$$$$ & ERRORS.

Now, she claims i forced her into marriage and she is not mentally ready because i asked her to change to my family's name.// A CHANGE OF NAME IS THE NORM AND SHOULDNT BE FORCED, AM SURE SHE WONT EVEN WAIT FOR YOU TO TELL HER IF ALL INDICES ARE IN TOUCH. MAYBE YOU ARE USING THE NAZI APPROACH TO ASK HER TO DO THIS, REMEMBER THE AIR AROUND U GUYS ARE ALREADY HEATED UP, SHE MAY BE HOLDING ON TO HER NAME AS THE LAST ASSET SHE HAS THAT MAKES HER FEEL LIKE A HUMAN WITH HER OWN MIND. CALM DOWN Bro.

She has been good then bad then worse..And i think her words about forcing her into marriage has irreparably hurt me. // GOOD AND BAD IS STILL AN EFFECT OF THE SITUATIONS AROUND UR NEW HOME, MAKE A WOMAN TO FEEL LIGHT THEN U SEE THE BEST IN HER FOREVER. AM SURE SHE WAS SUPER GOOD WHICH MADE U WAIT FOR HER ALL THROUGH 5 YEARS WITHOUT GETTIG DISTRACTED BY ALL THE BABES RUNNING AROUND YOU, STILL LOOK TO THAT GOOD IN HER U SAW BEFORE AND BRING IT OUT MORE THROUGH KINDNESS, EASYNESS AND MORE PARTNERSHIP.

I spent over 3m of my cash to give her the wedding she wanted (Without any support from her family) against my wish for a 1m wedding.// YOU SHOULD HAVE GIVEN HER REASONS TO KEEP TO THE N1m BUDGET, AM SURE U ALSO LIKEd THE FEELING FROM THE N3m BUDGET. PLEASE DROP THIS PRIDE NOW, MY BROTHER SPENT N5m ON HIS WEDDING, SOME DEY EVEN SPEND MORE TO SHOW HOW U FEEL ABOUT WHAT IS ABOUT TO HAPPEN TO YOUR LIFE. MARRIAGE IS A LIFETIME SOMETHING, WEDDING IS JUST THE STEP TO IT. FORGET THE PAST AND DWELL ON THE FUTURE bro. DONT LET PRIDE KILL YOU

And despite getting the big wedding she wants before consenting to marry last year, she claims she is not mentally ready and was forced into marriage. //MAYBE YOU MISSED IT HERE, JUST TAKE THE GENTLE PATH AND LAUGH OVER SOME OF HER NAGGINGS. WOMEN ARE MADE TO NAG OCCASSIONALLY AND A STRONG LOVING MAN WILL ALWAYS LAUGH OVER IT

she has repeated this over and over and its making me go crazy..in fact im tired already// DO THE RIGHT THING AND WIN BACK UR MARRIAGE BRO.


In conclusion, i think you need to take a mirror and see if you can see yourself in it and see yourself as the part problem of this problem. GOD BLESS !!!

4 Likes 1 Share

Re: Im Thinking Of Divorce Just Few Months Into Marriage by Ooye12: 4:50pm On Feb 02, 2020
You can only force horse to go to river but you can’t force horse to drink water , bro free Dis gal joor

1 Like

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